Chapter 23: Chapter 0023 – Confessions

‘The box is smaller on the inside.’ Ravela thought to herself as she sat down.

 

There would be nobody in church for hours, so Ravela could take her time to talk with Namon. She needed an ally with moral authority, not just a fascination with the unknown and superpowers.

 

Ravela was pulled out of her thought by the separating door being opened. The grid in it hid their face as much as a piece of window glass would have. Ravela now understood what Namon meant when he talked about the principle of the thing.

Ravela leaned forward. “So how do we start this?”

 

Keeper Namon sighed. “The customary phrase would be: ‘Guide me, Keeper, for I have strayed from the path.’ If you wish to follow the tradition strictly, that is.”

 

Ravela leaned back from the partition and said. “Guide me, Keeper, for I have strayed from the path.”

 

Namon just responded. “Tell me about it.”

 

She felt a bit disappointed that he had no customary response to it, but she filed that away for a conversation for another time.

 

“Where do I even begin?” Ravela started her tale.

“I have deceived you and everybody in Gradjia. Unwittingly at first, but then willingly, yet simultaneously without evil intention. I am not Ramiel Roice. I never was. I knew that from the start. I kept this lie going 'cause I have no choice if I want to have a life here.”

 

Namon drew in his breath sharply. That was a much bigger bomb than he had expected.

 

“Then who are you?” He inquired.

 

“I- I don’t quite know that. It wasn’t a complete lie. I didn’t know how to speak a word when I arrived here. I know that I am called Ravela. Ravela, the Wanderer by a higher power.”

 

Keeper Namon didn’t interrupt her, so Ravela kept talking.

 

“I also lied to you directly. The days after the bus accident I told you I had a nosebleed and a headache that day. That was not true. I was there. I intervened when that bus crashed through the barrier.”

 

That confused Namon. “How did you intervene? You didn’t cause the crash, did you, Ravela?”

 

“I did not.” Ravela thought about how she could best say what she did. “I caught the bus.”

 

“You caught the bus?” Namon repeated.

 

Ravela leaned toward the grid and repeated. “I caught that bus. Do you have a copy of the Golden Path in there with you? I will show you what I mean if you hold it up.”

 

Keeper Namon wordlessly pulled one of the books into view. Ravela telekinetically pulled it from his palm. “I caught the bus like that.”

 

Keeper Namon went a bit paler. “You caught an entire bus with….what? An invisible hand? Magnetism? What is this I am seeing?”

 

“This isn’t some cheap trick with magnets. I can move things with my mind. I could lift you if that made you believe me. In fact…” Ravela lifted Namon off his seat, careful not to bump him against the ceiling of the confessional box.

 

“Woah, okay. Alright. P-put me down. I believe you.” Namon said in a startled and unusually nervous fashion.

 

Ravela let him down slowly.

 

Keeper Namon collected himself and then spoke.

 

“So you saved the town’s children. Why are you confessing the good you did?”

 

Her response was simple. “I lied to you about what I did that day. I am trying to confess how I wronged you and the town by misleading you.”

 

“So you did a good deed, and to hide this good deed you told a lie. Would it be better if you said you went running that day and the town hated you for not alerting us to the accident?”

 

Ravela thought about that. “I suppose that would have been worse. I couldn’t have told anyone about the accident. I barely made it back to my room before passing out.”

 

Keeper Namon took that opportunity to inquire. “So you were ill that day. Was it because you saved the children on the bus?”

 

Ravela looked down at her hands. “Yes, believe it or not, catching a bus is no easy feat.”

 

Keeper Namon laughed. “I can’t imagine it would be. So, Ravela, what is it then? Are you a criminal in hiding? Or what is your story?”

 

Ravela thought about her answer for a while. “What I am is a good question.” Ravela tapped the tip of her nose, mulling the question over.

 

“What I am is complicated. I was not a criminal, so I believe. But I am no doubt faking myself into a chance at life here, which is a crime. So I am a criminal now. But what if I had…a higher purpose here? Would it be a crime to sneak me in to fulfill what I have found my duty?”

 

Keeper Namon leaned forward. “That is quite the rationalization there, Ravela. What higher purpose do you have in Gradjia, I wonder?”

 

“But it is my duty, as I have gifted two others here with powers.”

 

Namon’s face abruptly appeared behind the grid again. “What do you mean by you have gifted others powers?”

 

Ravela sighed. “It is as I said it. I am not a human, Namon. I am not like you. I have to guide the girls, but I lack the experience necessary to form them. I can train them, and make them warriors but I found teaching the ethically right way to be….difficult. They want me to grant another person powers and they are so blind to the risks that they even tried to steal from me.”

 

“W-what? Hold on. Stop. Again from the start, but slowly. Did you just say that you aren’t human?”

 

Ravela looked at the grid, nodding. “Yes, I am not human.”

 

Keeper Namon looked at her skeptically. “Then what are you? You look human to me.”

 

Holding up her right hand, she said. “I look human because of this ring.”

 

Namon’s expression got serious, “Then show me your true self, Ravela. You want to confess, not the mask you wear right now.”

 

Ravela looked at the wooden ceiling and let out a long sigh followed by a pondering pause. Slowly her hand wandered to the ring, yet her fingers pulled back at the touch of the metal. Hesitation tested her resolve. “And you are certain you wish to see?” Ravela asked one last time.

 

The man in the other cabin nodded slowly.

 

“So be it then.” She took a deep breath. She closed her eyes before she pulled on the ring. Ramiel’s ring slipped off her finger, and she felt the illusion dispelled.

 

Ravela just sat there for a moment before she opened her eyes and looked at the keeper and his reaction. The glow of her eyes reflected on the grid.

 

She heard Namon swallow dryly. On his face was stamped complete surprise as if he hadn’t expected Ravela to turn into something not human. Ravela wondered if he thought her a superpowered madman before she took off the ring.

 

“You look shocked, Keeper Namon. I suppose that is only right.” Ravela nodded to herself. Her voice vibrating through the cabin hid her uncertainty well. Ravela for the first time noticed the reverberation that carried more strength than normal. “And now you see the truth of my words. Where do a Wanderer and a Keeper go from here, Namon?”

 

The keeper leaned back in his seat. He needed a moment to gather himself. Ravela waited patiently for Namon to speak when he was ready.

 

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This awkward silence dragged on for an uncomfortably long time. Ravela got worried. Perhaps Namon froze with no idea how to move on, but then he spoke up.

 

“So, why are you here then?”

 

Ravela thought carefully about the question. It had a hint of something Ravela couldn’t place. It was not fear, nor was it affection. She felt now more awkward than during the time she barely could articulate herself when talking to Namon.

 

“Here in this box or here in Gradjia?” Ravela inquired.

“Hm, let’s start with why you are in Gradjia first. Then we will go from there.” Namon said.

 

Mindful of the cultural significance of the continued conversation, she weighed her answer carefully.

 

“Chance brought me here at first, but I found a place amongst your people and found help from you and the sheriff.”

 

She could hear Namon shift in his seat. “Then why pick the name Ramiel?”

 

Ravela pondered her options to steer the conversation without lying outright. She thought of the man halting the guards in her dream. He had taken her in and formed her into his gladiator. The only father she ever knew.

“My father was stern, powerful. Those he led followed his words as if they came from god himself. When I was young, I learned at his feet. A proud daughter seeking glory in devotion, purpose in loyalty. I came here after I saw to it that my father gained incredible honor through victory in a tournament our…our tribe hadn’t won in…I honestly think I was created, at the time, we had last won.” She put her elbows on her knees and placed her chin in her interlocked fingers. “It was that very moment that I got chosen. I am on a journey that led me here by a light that I can’t put into words, but I’m sure I don’t have to. I feel that is all I am allowed to say, on that, in the greater scheme of things.”

 

Her conversation partner seemed to mull her words over. Namon did seem precisely happy with this roundabout. “So I ask you why you chose that name for your human form, and you tell me about your father,” She could see Namon massaging his cleanly shaven chin with one hand while the rest of him remained hidden from her view. “I see. I understand what you were saying.”

 

Ravela felt a tad bad misleading him about that part, but she needed to be accepted by Namon and needed his help.

 

“Are you one of the Nephilim?”

 

Ravela turned her eyes to the door in front of her. “I am not.”

 

“And you gave children in Gradjia powers?”

 

Nodding, she replied. “I did. Two children.”

 

“Who are they?” The keeper inquired even though he probably already knew. Who had helped Ravela study the past months, after all?

 

“Laena and Safora got powers through me. I taught them control, but something happened. Safora came to me with her brother, who knew of her change. She attempted to have me change the boy too. I told her that she had to convince me she understood what she asked of me. Keeper, these alterations are connected with grave risk.”

 

“Risks? And you changed the two girls anyway.” She could hear the disapproval seep into his voice.

 

“The first time, it was, as I said, by accident. Hmm, or maybe by fate. Safora and Laena went through my things while I was traveling, and they took something of mine. As I retrieved it, I used my powers, and the girl became gifted at that moment. Laena and Markus were there at that time, and though I sent them both away, Laena later approached me, asking for a chance to gain a gift like Safora. I saw that Safora wanted her friend to get a chance badly, and rejecting her would lead to her resenting me and rejecting my offer to train and guide her to understand her powers.” Ravela sighed deeply. “So I caved and did for Laena what I did for Safora. Luckily, the girl didn’t turn into a salt pillar or other horrible adverse events that could happen when one comes into contact with the alteration.”

 

She paused her tale waiting for Namon to ask her anything or interject otherwise, but he did not. So Ravela kept talking.

 

“That all happened a month ago. I have been training both girls. So they get used to their powers. So they’d use their strength responsibly and for good. They absorbed everything I taught them so easily, I thought. But the day before yesterday, Safora came to me with her brother Markus, you know the kid?”

 

Keeper Namon leaned forward, looking through the small obfuscated window once again. “Why? Do you consider their request?”

 

Ravela looked down. “I am not sure I should after what happened earlier this morning. Laena and I went running around the lake like we do every day before breakfast. Usually, Safora is part of that routine too, but she didn’t show up the day before. At first, I thought she was staying away because she was sulking, but Laena was late, and I had a suspicion. I turned back and found Markus and Safora in my room. They wanted to force my hand, and now I am here. I thought they’d respect my words, but it turned out they didn’t much care for anything I said at all. Unsure how to deal with this, I turned to a friend. That’s you, by the way.”

 

Namon held his hand over his face on the other side of the wall. He was shocked at the blatant attempt of the teenagers to just steal from Ravela.

 

“Ugh. I see. So you came here to confess your deception and seek guidance.”

 

Ravela nodded. “Yes, I suppose so. It would be invaluable if you had a sermon on the topic which could guide them toward a more wise approach. But don’t confront them with your knowledge of their powers directly.”

 

Namon’s face abruptly appeared behind the grid again. “I would never use what was said to me in a confession against others. You have to understand this. Inside this box, I get to know the truth as god knows. But I am not to use that knowledge. The only reason to know these things is to help you.”

 

“I see. That is good then.” Ravela nodded.

 

“As for your problem, I have quite a few passages that talk about exactly these kinds of troubles.” Keeper Namon put on his storytelling voice and began to tell Ravela the tale he had in mind for her situation.

 

Ramiel, The Watcher, brings gods gift to Ombo, King of the Nubians, when the king was traveling through his lands and made camp at a newly discovered oasis. He was overjoyed, but upon returning home, his wife is furious. ‘Ombo,’ she said. ‘ return to that place and demand that your children become gifted too. Surely, god can’t refuse you.’ And so Ombo the Prince returned and convened once more with Ramiel. Pleading with him to grant his children god’s blessing too.

Ramiel, coming down from heaven, grants Ombo his request. All his sons were now gifted by the lord as he was. Yet on his return, his wife was not joyous as he was. She told him that god should’ve gifted all their children powers, yet Ombo’s daughters were still without gifts. And Ombo looked at his daughters and could not bring his wife to seize her demands.

 

So Ombo the King returns to the oasis. Ramiel greets him like an old friend, but he is no longer alone. By the water of the oasis, three more of Ramiel’s brothers stood. Unlike Ramiel, their expressions were grim. Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael all had their arms crossed.

 

Ombo told Ramiel that his daughters were his children too. They shouldn’t have been excluded from the gifts. The four archangels looked at each other. Three of them shook their heads, but once again, Ramiel vanished toward heaven. His brothers followed him. Their expressions left no doubt about their position.

 

King Ombo waited three days and three cold nights at the oasis, and on the morning of the fourth day, Ramiel returned. God, in his mercy, granted Ombo the King this last request. Ombo was about to return home when he noticed that the water in the oasis was draining. Ombo, King of the Nubians, saw some of the rich vegetation had vanished. He looked at the archangel, in his eyes a pained look, and King Ombo knew he could not return lest the oasis vanish and the desert they now were able to cross become unpassable again.

 

But upon his return once more he found no peace at home. The laughter of his children was soured by his wife’s bitterness. ‘How could you not ask for me to receive gods blessing?’ she asked him. This time King Ombo spent two blessed months with his children enjoying their gifts attempting to leave the matter behind, but his wife never stopped berating him.

 

After two months he returned to the oasis again. But this time no archangel waited for him. The plants of the oasis turned brown when he entered. The water vanished into the ground. There was a lone angel with no wings sitting at the former lakeside.

 

‘Ombo the King. King of the Nubians. Your children and you were blessed by god. Why would you return here?’

 

The angel greeted him. And an angel he was for his eyes glowed with divine light.

 

‘Oh angel, I came to plead with Ramiel. I have no peace at home. My wife seeks god’s blessing as well. Won’t you call Ramiel so he may hear my plea?’

 

‘I shall not. I was sent here in his sted. Long have I traveled to reach this place. Long have I waited here. I had hopes that god sent me here in vain, but no path I wandered on his order ever led nowhere.’

And the angel took from Ombo King of Nubians the gifts god bestowed on him, his sons, and his daughters.

 

‘For I am the Sorrow of God.’ The angel said, and as he turned he vanished as if he never had been there.

 

Ombo, King of the Nubians was horrified and hurried back home. But when he returned his children had fallen victim to their powers, and his wife had taken her life after witnessing the death of her children. Ombo, King of the Nubians died on the spot from grief.

 

“So goes the passage on Ombo, King of Nubians. I think it is rather fitting for the occasion.” Keeper Namon finished.

 

Ravela exhaled deeply. “Yes, it seems so. Sorrow of God…I like The Wanderer better.” Mixing in one last comment to imply that higher powers were at work. It wasn’t a lie but what Namon took from the comment was so obvious that it may as well be one. Yet in Ravela’s mind lying and someone else reaching a false conclusion after hearing a true statement were two different things.

 

Namon just sat there for a moment before he spoke again. “For your deception against me, I forgive you. Nowhere in the Golden Path are we taught to do good and claim our deeds. It is, rather, the opposite if you do good for the good deed's sake, it is regarded as higher. God sees your deeds and measures you by them. Your deception to gain an identity in Gradjia, well… I do not see a way you could have lived here without changing your name and outward appearance. I absolve you of that as well. But did you not know how to speak our language? I mean it is said that you have the gift of tongues from god.”

 

Ravela relaxed a bit. “You see, I know many languages, but I am a bit of a different case. I have been far less often on this planet than I have been to other realms. I also have a different gift of tongues for the same reason.”

Keeper Namon sputtered. “Other realms? What do you mean by that?”

 

Ravela laughed. “I have seen many things on my journey. But what I lacked the most was a companion on all my travels. You are a good friend, Namon. I hope you keep teaching me about your world and its current state. Talking to you always felt like having a direct line to home. But I should go for your sermon is not so far away anymore, and the early birds will soon arrive.”

 

Namon looked at a pocket watch he pulled from his robe. “Very true. Then Ravela the Wanderer, we shall meet again. I will do what I can in my sermon, but once the iron is hot, the duty to form it right is with you.”

 

Ravela put Ramiel’s ring back on. “Please, call me Ramiel.”

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