Chapter 96: Chapter Forty-Four – With Both Hands

“Do you have any threes?” Moon asked after a long pause, fixing a steely gaze on Sakura. The girl thought for a long moment, the tension in the air ratcheting up in the resultant silence.

“Go fish,” Sakura finally grinned impishly.

“Gah!” Moon exclaimed. “Dammit!” She reached for the stack of cards on the table between them and drew the one on top.

“I do not understand this game,” Ashvallen admitted with a shake of her head. “There are no fish at all. Why not call it ‘guess wrong and pick up a card’?””

“The game is meant for children,” Moon shook her head. “No kid’s going to play a game like that.”

“Yet isn’t misnaming it going to cause children to be disillusioned? What if they expect fish and instead get…this?” Ashvallen had gone through quite the metamorphosis Moon marveled. The “fluff” she’d complained about had vanished in the past 8 months, replaced through the liberal and dedicated use of the base’s fitness centers with something barely resembling Minji’s body. Minji’s body was lithe and lean and athletic, though her boobs were still too large for Ashvallen’s taste.

Their relationship, too, had undergone something of a metamorphosis as well. Though physically, apart from some kissing and petting Moon couldn’t bring herself to fully engage with the idea of doing anything more with Ashvallen in her sister’s body. Emotionally, though was a different story. They had grown as close as she had ever been with anyone. They comforted each other and cared for each other, and Moon simply couldn’t imagine a point in time when Ashvallen wasn’t in her life.

Sakura, too, had become an integral part of their little group. From time to time one of her siblings would join them but usually it was the three of them sitting over cards or a board game or playing a video game at the end of the day. Ashvallen had learned to read and write in both Japanese and Korean and Sakura had learned Korean while Moon’s own Japanese was at least passable. College was going well as was high school for Sakura.

Their routine had become comfortable and, if not entirely pleasant, at least bearable. Sakura in particular would grow melancholic at the life and particularly the senpai she’d been forced to leave behind. Moon and Ashvallen did what they could to make sure they were there to lend a helping hand and, if nothing else, to at least listen to what was bothering her. Moon was able to send letters to her parents to let them know she was safe, though she always claimed to be with Minji.

Minji. As always, she was the wildcard. She obviously hadn’t died in the other world. Moon was grateful she hadn’t, but from what Ashvallen had told her of the other world, increasingly surprised in a pleasant way. No one could give them an idea of what was happening. The only thing anyone could do was pass the time as well as they were able and wait.

“So, Sakura-chan,” Moon smiled at the younger girl over her cards, “are you excited about tomorrow?”

“Ah,” the girl shrugged noncommittally. “Not really, I guess. I always wondered whether or not I’d make it to sixteen but now that it’s almost here it seems kind of hollow, you know?”

“You’ll see her again,” Ashvallen patted the girl’s shoulder soothingly. While originally stilted and awkward at empathizing with others Ashvallen had gotten progressively better.

“Yeah,” Sakura smiled sadly. “I…I hope so.”

“I know you will!” Ashvallen declared with a sage-like nod. “You two are fa- “Her voice suddenly failed her, dropping to a squeaky whisper as she gasped for breath.

“Ash?” Moon leaned toward her in concern as the color seemed to drain from Ashvallen’s face. “Are you ok?” Moon’s alarm grew desperate as a small trickle of blood emerged from the corner of Ashvallen’s mouth and her wide eyes found Moon’s own. “Ash! Talk to me, Ash!” Moon demanded frantically as her and Sakura rushed to Ashvallen’s side.

“Call for help,” Sakura ordered quickly. “I’ll start CPR!”

“Ash?” Moon stared at Ashvallen’s stricken form in a panic, her mind blank with terror.

“You have to call NOW!” Sakura demanded harshly, breaking Moon from her paralysis.

 

***

 

“Ugh,” I groaned, my body aching and my head feeling fuzzy. “Fuck that bitch! One minute she’s all ‘I love you’ and the next she’s killing me again. Seriously. Who the fuck does that?” I staggered to my feet painfully and squinted, looking around me curiously. “Wait. Where the hell am I?” I’d seen stories about a long white hall as you died but figured it was simply synapses firing in your brain making you see things that weren’t there, but I was, in fact, in what appeared to be a giant white room filled with bright light.

“I wonder if this is a god’s waiting room?” My head and chest still ached as if someone was trying to pull my heart out through my ear, but the burning agony had subsided somewhat. Maybe I was, but what god? “If this is a god’s waiting room they’re boring as hell and need some furniture and a plant or something. The feng shui is all off.”

I supposed, honestly, going to an Ikea wasn’t much of an option when one was busy doing whatever it was gods did. Most likely smiting things and coming unto people and the like. Still, blank white seemed to take shiftless a bit too far. It was very bright and unappealing. At least put up a cat poster or something, I mused as I wandered. Suddenly a break in the light caught my eye. Distant but noticeable, I cocked my head curiously and began to walk toward it.

Now that I think about it, I pondered as I walked, this is the first time anything like this has happened after I died. I didn’t remember every time since I was dead for most of it, but I think I’d have recalled a bright white Enka music video set being around. Every other time was just dark and cold and still. I squinted as I walked. Something appeared to be walking toward me. Something, I thought, or someone. This, I decided, was definitely a first.

As the person, for person it was, drew closer I was more than a little surprised to find myself staring at…well, not to put too fine a point on it, myself. Although I had lost weight and looked pretty good it was still definitely me. The me I was staring at’s eyes narrowed dangerously as they finally caught sight of the me in Ashvallen’s body and we gradually came to a stop a meter from each other.

“It’s you,” the other me growled. I tilted my head upward a bit to find me glaring back. Was I always so tall?

“Ashvallen, I presume?” It didn’t take a genius to figure out I had plainly suffered some sort of psychological break following the latest betrayal by Carrisyn and was locked inside my own head dealing with some metaphysical self-loathing manifesting as my real self.

“Minji,” Ashvallen nodded her head once, her voice low and hostile.

“You can drop the attitude, you know,” I sniffed, feeling rather irritated as well and in no mood to deal with the abject hostility emanating from her.

“You stole my body!” Ashvallen raged, fists clenched at her side.

“I did no such thing!” I shouted before sighing and rubbing my finger over the bridge of my nose irritably. “Look, I’m in no mood to be chastised by a physical materialization of guilt and anger. It’s been a long year and, honestly, I just don’t need it.”

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“Yeah!” Ashvallen snarled. “It has been a long year and then some stuck in this stupid, bloated, useless body with cow udders for tits!”

“You have no ide- Wait! What did you say?” I glared at her. “You ungrateful bitch! I got this piece of plywood body and you get a body with actual curves and you’re complaining? Not to mention I got shoved into a fucking dungeon where I was nearly sexually assaulted, then killed, then killed again and rinse and repeat and you have the audacity to bitch because you have impressive boobs?”

“Impressive? Ha! Useless is what they are! They are the result of laziness and too many snacks!” Ashvallen snarled. “Wait! You killed me?”

“I didn’t kill you! Everyone else killed you!” I shot back. “I thought it was because you were a half-elf and universally hated but now that I meet you in person, I can see it was probably because your personality sucks! You got a nice apartment and all the best amenities, and I got vampires and dead relatives, and fucking revenants so don’t take an attitude with me!”

“Yeah? Well screw you! People attacked your apartment and blew the whole thing up because they were after you! It couldn’t have been because of your interactions with anyone because you’re a shut in and recluse and I have no idea how you didn’t end up a desiccated husk of a human playing with your sex toys all day and all night!” Ashvallen yelled back at me. “It must have been because you were so worthless, they felt they were doing society a favor by killing you!”

“Someone blew up…my apartment?” I blinked at her. “What?”

“Ah…” Ashvallen’s rage faded quickly, and she glanced away guiltily. “Uh…yeah. I’m very sorry about that. I’m not really sure what happened there. There were some mages or something that attacked or…honestly, a lot was going on that I didn’t really grasp.”

“Is Moon ok?” I mumbled, trying to wrap my mind around things. My apartment was gone?

“Oh! Yeah! She’s fine! We’ve been living at a hidden base together for the last 10 months or so,” she nodded sheepishly.

“Oh,” I mumbled glumly, relieved Moon was ok, but devastated at the loss of my apartment and everything in it. “That’s good. Hidden bases are nice.” I squinted as a door appeared amidst the endless white some distance away. “Was that door always there?”

“Door?” Ashvallen asked, turning in the direction I was facing. “Oh. How peculiar. I didn’t see that before.” She turned back toward me, and her eyes grew wide. “Is that supposed to be happening?”

“Hmm?” I asked, turning around to find the white area behind me was beginning to crumble, the white falling away to reveal only endless black night. “Oh. I don’t think that’s a good thing.” As the chunks of white began to fall away and vanish, spinning away into nothingness. Wherever we were was beginning to collapse around us. Forget about the dream collapsing I thought in alarm. The entire reality here is collapsing! I had no idea what was going on, but I was positive the door was the only way out.

“Run!” I cried as I took off toward the distant portal waiting placidly for us. My legs propelled me forward faster and faster as the door grew incrementally closer. How far is this damn door? I wondered, the room continuing to spin off into the void around me.

After what seemed like an eternity, I reached the door and flung it open. Beyond was nothing more than a cool and starry sky. Far below I could see the faint outline of mountains and trees as if the door itself hung suspended in midair some 20 kilometers over the surface of the world. Well, I thought, it was still better than nothing. I turned to find Ashvallen running my way still, her legs propelling her along as the white room fell away. She was not going to make it. That much was obvious. The precipitous fall frightened me, and the white room unnerved me. But the soundless, lightless void absolutely terrified me.

“You can’t leave her to vanish, dear,” Meri’s voice whispered in my mind.

“Still with me, eh?” I thought, searching for a way to save her without putting us both in danger.

“Evidently so,” Meri answered. “You have to save her.”

“I know! I know!” I snapped in reply. The room beyond Ashvallen and my body had already mostly vanished into nothingness, only bits and pieces remained, plain white windows in the dull blackness of the grave.

“Fffuckk,” I hissed, rushing back toward her.

I reached her quickly enough and grabbed her hand in mine, pulling her with me as fast as I could. Her breath was coming in ragged gasps as the limits of her body…my body…were quickly being reached. The stars hung through the doorway not far away, now. I could see them twinkling welcomely through the collapsing tunnel the white room had become.

“You have got to hurry up!” I entreated her desperately.

“I’m trying!” she gasped in response, her gait becoming unstable as her legs began to give out beneath her.

“Fucking try harder!” I snapped, bemoaning the years I’d spent propped in blankets and pillows on the couch eating popcorn watching anime. I figured I’d be one of the first to go in a zombie apocalypse and was kind of ok with it, but never imagined this sort of scenario. Suddenly I stumbled and fell, my body jerking backward. I whirled in alarm to find the ground beneath Ashvallen had vanished, leaving her dangling over the void, only her tenuous grip on my hand keeping her from falling away.

Instinctively I set my feet on the white ground and pushed myself backward, holding on to her with all I was worth. My muscles, honed over the past year through combat and toil and hardship, bunched and coiled and my slide toward the edge slowed and eventually stopped. I risked a panicky look around me and confirmed I did not have much time left.

“You have to give me your other hand!” I shouted desperately, her fingers slipping tenuously through mine.

“I don’t want to go back! I can’t!” Ashvallen sobbed in exhausted reply.

“I don’t know how any of this shit works, but I can’t hold on unless you give me both hands!” I felt rather than saw her pause for a long moment. Suddenly with extreme effort she swung her body and her other hand slipped over the edge. I grabbed her and pulled with all my might, Ashvallen helping the best she was able. Several exhausted, anguished moments passed before I managed to pull her up over the edge and onto the white floor.

Though both of us were exhausted I helped her to her feet and turned back toward the door. So close, yet so far away. The remainder of the world was gone, vanished as if it never was. Only the spot we stood upon, and several lone stragglers remained. Ashvallen and I looked at each wordlessly. There was nothing left to do.

“I’m in love with Moon,” Ashvallen gasped, nodding at me once. Oh, please say they didn’t have sex in my body, I thought to myself desperately. The awkwardness at family dinners if I got back would be too much to bear.

“I had sex on a magical spider web with the countess,” I shrugged.

“What?” Ashvallen blinked at me curiously.

“JUMP!” I shouted, grabbing her hand, and leaping over the abyss toward the door as the last of the room where we’d just been standing spun away and vanished.

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