Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Death

Ah, I died.

I'm a lot calmer than I expected, perhaps it had to do with the fact that I died by a woman's hands. An extremely beautiful woman might I add.

I can still vividly remember her sweet luscious ass and thighs crushing my chest as she maniacally stabbed my balls twenty-seven times. Yes, I did count, why do you ask?

She must've been that serial killer everyone was talking about...I believe she was called the Ball Stabber. Quite the fitting name.

I wonder if my family will miss me... Probably. Yeah, probably.

Even if I was once a convicted felon ready to get the electric chair, I'm sure somewhere deep in their hearts they'll mourn my untimely death. Or at least they have the decency to not spit on my grave... Heartless bastards.

Ahhh, I'm getting angry just thinking about it.

...hmm, come to think of it.

Why am I thinking about it?

Is this the afterlife? An empty abyss where the only thing living are my thoughts?

...That's a bit morbid. A little too morbid for my taste.

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If I'm forever stuck here with only my thoughts, I'll be driven insane!

Damn it!

God f*cking damn it!

—THUD!

Damn it I fell!

......wait.

I FELL?!?!

———

Author's Note: Sorry this chapter is so short, I'm only writing this for shits and giggles. I don't intend to churn out a masterpiece that requires me to expend more than three brain cells.

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