At first, An Yize did not realize the sorrow reflected in this girl’s eye.
It was Su Jian that walked past him and accidentally bumped into him. Hence she repeatedly said, “Sorry.” Only then did he lift his head to take a glance.
At first sight, he only felt that this girl’s eyes were clean and limpid. Furthermore, it seemed to be filled with sorrow that couldn’t be relieved, which was totally inharmonious with the bar’s atmosphere.
But he didn’t pay too much attention to it. With only a simple nod to her, he then broke eye contact.
Su Jian also hurriedly walked away from his side with her dampened expression.
………
When the night had dawned upon Su Jian, she was still outside the bar.
She was being bullied by two guys blocking the secluded area beside the bar.
An Yize stopped in his footsteps momentarily, turning towards her.
His upbringing had not allowed him to only run away when danger presented itself, but, furthermore, that girl was about the same age as his younger sister.
Being the hero that saved the beauty also wasn’t the simplest thing to do. An Yize fought with the two guys, and although being victorious wasn’t considered difficult, he had suffered quite a few blows.
Unexpectedly, the girl was really anxious. “Do you want to go to the hospital to check?”
He shook his head, turned his body in preparation to go, but the girl called him out.
“Thank you! Thank you so much!”, the girl had seemingly did not how to express her gratefulness, she abruptly bowed with the perfect ninety-degree bow towards him.
An Yize was silent for a moment. Afterwards, he indifferently said, “You seem to be unfamiliar with these types of places? After this, it would be best if you come here less often.”
The girl seemed to think of something, and her eye sockets were a little red. Then she murmured, “It’s not that I want to, but I need money.”
…….
An Yize didn’t want to be nosey, but after listening to this sentence he couldn’t help but crinkle his brow. “Why do you need to come to a bar if you need money?”
At that moment the girl’s face somewhat paled. She glanced in his direction flurriedly and nervously averted her eyes.
An Yize finally understood instinctively.
He thought, so everyone had their own stories.
By no means was he in the position to interfere with other people’s businesses, so he looked towards the scared stiff girl with a glance. Without saying anything, he naturally poised to turn his body.
But the girl stopped him to explain herself.
She said that her mother had gotten a serious illness, which required a large sum for the treatment, but her family really couldn’t prepare such a sum. She asked her friends to lend her some money, but the total amount she gathered wasn’t much. Born in a family where her mother raised her single-handedly, she was affixed on saving her mother. She honestly was at her wit’s end, and in a moment of desperation, she had thought of selling her body. However she wasn’t well versed in this aspect, and yet she was embarrassed to inquire others about it. So going by her assumptions, she felt that she would have a chance at the bar. However, who knew that she would ultimately have met bad people…
“Thank you so so much!” The girl had once again bowed towards him. When she lifted her head, her eyes slightly glistened, but she quietly wiped it with a relatively composed expression.
An Yize was silent for a few seconds. Afterwards, he monotonously said, “This isn’t a good solution.”
The girl gave a bitter laugh, softly saying, “I know that as well, but I really had no other ideas…”
An Yize did not say anything more. He nodded in the girl’s direction of the girl, and left.
Howbeit at that every instant he turned his body, he suddenly thought of a plan.
He languidly turned his body and stared at the girl for a long time.
The girl felt somewhat perturbed, and she anxiously peered at him: “Sir?”
An Yize unhurriedly uttered, “I can offer you a deal. I will help you pay for your mother’s treatment fees, but you will have to put up a show with me, would you be willing to do so?”
…….
An Yize knew that this action of his had traces of animosity.
He also knew that he couldn’t leave any prospects of him being with her anymore.
Unattainable things would always be at the back of one’s mind, and the one who received such biases would have a strong advantage.
He never did obtain it, and as such he didn’t need to pursue it any longer, even with an upheaval, he had to suppress it resolutely.
She had always been on the partial side, but now he didn’t want to leave that backdoor. He who had waited so long inside, had been hurt so deeply that he thought he ought to seal up this backdoor.
She was about to get married.
In that case, he could just marry also.
That way, the preposterous idea of him and her together would be shattered.
……..
Recently, his parents had actually urged him to marry, but his heart was stolen so he had always disagreed to it.
Although the An family didn’t need him to go for a political marriage, they definitely required him to have a wife.
He didn’t know if he could still love someone in this life, and thus, he didn’t want to hurt an innocent girl.
He himself knew that taste of suffering of not being to obtain what one wanted, so he couldn’t bear to personally inflict it onto an innocent girl. Since he couldn’t give his future wife his genuine love giving her what she needed it would be sufficient.
…………..
After listening to his condition, Su Jian was dumbfounded and she hesitated, saying that she wanted to go back and think about it.
An Yize nodded his head.
On the second day, he received her call about accepting it.
The two quickly got the marriage certificate.
He suddenly felt like a large weight had been lifted off his shoulders as he looked at the page that displayed their photos that didn’t have any smiles.
At the same moment, he felt a shrewd pain at the bottom of his heart as if it had been torn by something so relentlessly sharp. Yet it brought him a shrewd of absolute delight.
He closed and closed his eyes, before opening his eyes once again.
The girl beside was rather helpless as she looked at the silent standing man next to her. “Sir?”
He tilted his head and silently gazed at the girl.
Afterwards, he held her hand, slowly softening his expression.
“From now on, call me ‘Yize’. I’ll call you ‘Jian Jian’, how about that?”
…….
Su Jian was a girl that was completely different from Ji Yan.
Not only their facial features, but their temperament wasn’t similar at all.
Although there were some nervousness and over-cautiousness in the beginning, after some gradual interactions, Su Jian would be less reserved. But generally speaking, her nature still leaned towards being quiet. In front of others, she would naturally match him, after they left, she would be gentle as well as polite.
This kind of temperament was not annoying. Instead, he felt that her attitude was very suitable for their current situation. With the interactions he had with her, he felt it was simple and natural, which was totally different compared to the other person he had lived with who was calculative.
In addition, her looks were more youthful than his younger sister’s, so he who doted on his sister had added even more servings of warmth without withstrain, which was completely different from strangers that got the cold treatment.
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He thought, although it was a transaction, he also helped her, but how deep would this transaction damage her reputation? Originally she was an unmarried woman, and yet after a year, she would be a divorcee because of him. They called it a deal, but she was the one who got the short end of the stick.
Thereupon with about a month’s worth of association, the two weren’t intimate. But they slowly got accustomed to it as they accepted this tranquil and calm interaction.
……..
But no one could’ve known that she would get into a car accident, and lose her memory as well.
She was not like the former gentle and sweet girl before. She became extremely blunt, her expression would always be umpteen, and yet she was so incredibly simple. All her emotions would be written right on her face, letting others see through her with just a glimpse.
This version of her had made him feel a little helpless, but he quickly realized that he had actually been mesmerized by her ever so slightly.
He had seen many intelligent and capable working women. He was used to benign, rich ladies and had came across clingy or girls who feigned things. Yet it was the first time he had seen such a lass so lively even after breaking her leg.
Moreover, she always did things that leave him at a loss for words, and did things that made him at a loss to take action.
Although he was often put into awkward situations because of her, he also couldn’t deny that it was very interesting to be with her.
In the past, his life mostly consisted of waiting full of dejection; after he had the fake marriage with her, his life quieted down. However, all was quiet at sea, devoid of any emotion.
Yet now his life started to have unexpected waves crashing one after another, going into high gear to “pound” in full bloom.
By being together with her, his vision and heart were almost entirely occupied by her bizarre mannerisms, letting him have a non-existent abound time to think about other things.
Only after he came back to his senses did he found out that he already had forgotten about that painful person for quite some time.
So, his gaze became even all the more so gentle.
Because he was together with her, although he would feel frustrated, he would never feel hurt.
………..
Yet again, she totally lost that wariness she had with him before the accident.
Regarding the way he treated her, it also slowly became a more genuine.
The interactions between the two became much more natural, and much more intimate.
He didn’t reject it at all, but instead he felt that it was not bad.
In his life, the space she occupied grew more and more.
As for his heart, her significance grew more and more.
Seeing her lie on him and obediently letting him blow her hair, he often felt his tip of his heart have a kind of heat that would make people shudder.
This little lass only had him now.
She lost her memory, and broke her leg too. She couldn’t go anywhere, she could only obediently await for him at home, waiting for his tending, waiting for his… doting.
This is how she relied on him, and he was almost her everything now.
This made him feel mystical, it let him feel a type of ineffable ease and an incommunicable delight.
………..
He had no idea how he came to like her.
Perhaps it was because of the wounds, so he needed her warmth.
Perhaps it was because those who emerged before him had commonly only made him haggard and sad, so she who always full of vitality, made him feel novel yet soothing.
Perhaps it was because she had obediently accepted his care, causing him to have a peace of mind. Previously he always wanted to give it, but always failed to do so. However, by currently seeing her enjoy it like a squirrel, he was also infected by her happiness, even causing him to be slightly addicted.
Or perhaps it was because of a compelled communion—his and her acting of affection became more natural, letting him progressively blur the lines of acting and reality, gradually kneading into his genuine feelings. Because he felt that if they were really a loving husband and wife, doing so would be a major slip-up, but it had given an interesting and exuberant life—it wasn’t anything bad.
Hence, what he felt towards her was initially compassion, which was followed by exploitation, proceeded by serene association, and his heart had spouted something fantastic; it finally evolved into attraction, heartache, and heart-warming.
…………
Indeed at times, even he himself couldn’t believe it completely.
He had always thought that his former infatuation had squandered all his emotions, and in this life, he would not be able to feel for another person again.
Yet who knew, not long after, he met her.
He also didn’t know where he had heard this from: if you want to forget that period of emotions, there will only be one solution: time and new happiness. If time and new happiness also can’t help you forget it, there can only be one reason; it wasn’t long enough, and the new found happiness wasn’t good enough.
He naturally thought that not enough time had passed yet.
But he indeed confirmed that his frozen heart had started to melt.
He thought, if he had told that little lass of a new lover, she would definitely unreservedly proudly reply, “That’s a given!”
Thinking about that little lass’s possible reaction, he then felt that this reason wasn’t that bad.
…………
But right now the little lass was actually in his arms and told him that she liked him a lot. The person she most loved was him.
In a split second, he strangely felt that he was slightly at a loss.
He had thought of this before. Every morning he would tightly hug the relaxed yet sound asleep little lass who probably had some feelings for him nestled in his arms. But he never would have thought that her feelings towards him would actually be to such an extent.
He felt helplessly shocked, and yet he was relieved and happy at the same time.
The tip of his heart slowly became scalding hot.
Originally he only was perturbed towards her, but after listening to her drunk truthful ranters, he had suddenly felt that his own feelings towards her had intensified further.
These thirty years, he had learned a lot of knowledge, earned a lot of money, went to many different places and had seen many people. In his youth, he had the most simplest infatuation, and he had once experienced the most painful event. But, for the first time ever, he tasted the feeling of reciprocated happiness.
This kind of feeling had no need for words, it only had the beauty of a deep attraction.
Fortuitously addicted, he couldn’t bear to let it go.
His heart beated agitatedly, slowly turning into a cozy addiction.
He thought, so all along this world, there indeed was magic.
So indeed, life will always gift you with new joys, removing the poison from the tarsal bones.[1]
…………
An Yize gave a light peck on the person’s forehead at his bosom, marginally tightening his arms.
The vehicles and pedestrians bustled along, except for him, calmly embracing his perfect one.
Su Jian laid in his arms, still muddle-headedly muttering, “I will listen to all your words next time…”
Filled with gentleness, he replied with a murmur, “Mhm.”
Su Jian muttered, “I love you the most… Mom…”
An Yize: “……”
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