19: The Saint’s Regret ~POV: Lula~

I didn’t expect to become a saint.

At the time, my father had contracted a severe illness and didn’t have long to life. Thus, I miserably clung to his hand and prayed for his recovery.

…Suddenly, a veil of light cascaded upon my father, and before I knew it, he made a full recovery.

Then, the rest was history.

Hailed as the ‘Saint’, I received an invitation to the royal palace. That was my first time being invited there since that garden party. Afterwards, I was subsequently escorted to Prince Freddie’s room.

As I had never had a chance to speak with the king in my whole life, I was understandably confused. Moreover, I didn’t know what I was supposed to do. Mustering all the manners I had learned from my scary aunty; I greeted the king. In the end, I held Prince Freddie’s hand and prayed—just like I did with my father.

To my relief, the same phenomenon occurred, and Prince Freddie soon awoke. At the end of his sparkly gaze, was me.

From that day on, it was like a dream came true.

Unlike what I expected, right after annulling his engagement to Lady Daisy, Prince Freddie came to me.

Previously, I—a mere viscount’s daughter—could only cry after being bullied by a higher-ranking lady. But now, I had become the first prince’s fiancée! I could fly from my absolute happiness!

…Although, my happiness would’ve been perfect if my fiancé had been Lord Ryan. However, even after I became a saint, his cold demeanor didn’t change.

Still, His Highness Freddie is quite nice. Most importantly, he chose me—

—Which is why I’m in love with him!

Now, all that was left was for Lady Daisy to chastise me in public. After all, if a marquis’ daughter were to berate me for snatching her fiancé, everyone’d come to understand that there were more important things than just status. Contrary to my expectations, Lady Daisy didn’t seem to be annoyed, let alone lash out at me.

Well, it’s fine.

The fact that Prince Freddie chose me wouldn’t change.

As he’d always approve everything I did, I could do as I pleased right?

With Prince Freddie by my side, I felt at ease as I prayed for Lady daisy.

The desperation I felt when I prayed for my father’s recovery, or for Prince Freddie to awaken—

—I had completely forgotten about it.

★☆★

“Lula, I believe that after our graduation, my father will dictate we marry and embark on a journey to aid the whole country, but I want you to refuse.”

One day, Prince Freddie summoned me to the royal place. Seemingly encumbered by work, he seldom attended class at the academy.

Certainly, the king had called for the saint, but the appointed time itself was a few days later. As such, would it be alright for me to listen about it from Prince Freddie instead of him? In addition…

“…Would it be possible to refuse the king’s royal decree?”

“Since you’re the saint, my father shouldn’t be able to force you!”

Is that so? Is that truly the case?

…But why should I refuse?

While thinking wasn’t exactly my strong suit, I still did my best amidst the confusion.

Since I was the only saint in that country, if I didn’t lend my healing power, many would perish, right?

If such was the case, shouldn’t it be natural for me to embark on such a journey and help those in need?

Although the part where I’d be traveling by a horse-drawn carriage sounded tedious, I was sure that the towns and the villages would welcome me with open arms.

“Thank you for gracing us with your presence, Lady Saint.”

Merely hearing those words, the weariness from my travel would surely subside. Besides, it wasn’t like I abused my status to degrade or torment people… Therefore, I should be able to get along with commoners just fine.

Above all, if I were married with Prince Freddie and then we traveled together, wouldn’t it be akin to a long honeymoon?

“I want to travel around the country as a saint and aid the sick!”

Thus, I smiled my best smile—a saint-like one, which Prince Freddie praised as cute.

In response, Prince Freddie turned grim. His expression was unlike anything I had ever seen before.

“—But I don’t want to!”

Huh…?

“From the moment I was born, I was destined to be the crown prince!”

Eh…?

“…Lula, what do you think of Jake?”

“Why do you suddenly mention him…?”

“Lula, I think it’d be best for you to marry Jake.”

“What…?”

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“If I get back with Daisy, everything should revert back to normal.”

“Huh…?”

“Lula, can you please petition this of His Majesty the King as the saint? Tell him that you’d like to annul your engagement with me and marry Jake instead.”

What…?

What is he saying—?

No, first off, why doesn’t he do it himself—

—Could it be, he tried and it didn’t work?

 Is that why he’s trying to push me to do it?

But wait, this is strange? Is he being serious right now?

Huh?

Why would I get engaged with Prince Jake?

Eh? Why?

But didn’t His Highness Freddie choose me? He got engaged with me because he CHOSE me, right?

So why is he telling me to be with Prince Jake…?

Eh…?

Why—

I stared incredulously at my fiancé, Freddie.

Unlike during our first meeting, his eyes bore no light in them.

“Even if I’m like this, I still understand that our engagement isn’t something that can be annulled so easily.”

…After all, didn’t you make a display of annulling your engagement with Lady Daisy before subsequently announcing ours?

“Moreover, hasn’t Lady Daisy already gotten engaged with Lord Ryan?”

What I said should’ve been considered general knowledge, yet Prince Freddie’s face contorted all the same.

…I became engaged to Prince Freddie because I believed he had chosen me. However, the moment he set his eyes on the throne, he casted me aside.

It wasn’t until Prince Freddie—until my own fiancé betrayed me that it dawned on me—

—Until now, I had been blind.

Why didn’t Lord Ryan notice me…?

Why did those mean girls mistreat me so…?

Why did the friends I painstakingly made leave me…?

Why are there no decent boys around me…?

Why isn’t there a single boy who’d choose me even after annulling their engagement…?

…The things that I trampled for my enjoyment were just as important, if not more.

The girls who got betrayed by their fiancés were still engaged, with Lady Daisy being the only one who got abandoned as a result of my direct actions.

…But, even if those girls remained engaged, the fact that they’d been betrayed would never disappear, regardless of the fact that it was a one-time thing.

Surely, the bonds and trust that had been shattered by me were in a state of utter disrepair.

I had crossed the line.

After Prince Freddie pampered me with lavish gifts and a luxurious life, I became conceited, so much that I simply accepted the notion of making Lady Daisy his mistress.

I could never forgive that one, mean girl from my past.

However, Lady Daisy had never mistreated me—not even once.

Perhaps, Prince Freddie’s betrayal was my retribution.

I’d inevitably marry Prince Freddie. Nevertheless, after what took place today, I didn’t think I’d be able to entertain the idea of him loving me for even a second.

If only I hadn’t gotten intimate with those boys whom were already engaged…

If only I hadn’t behave passive-aggressively towards any of those girls to provoke them…

If only I had picked someone who chose me from the start…

…That way I wouldn’t have settled with Prince Freddie for the sole reason of him canceling his engagement for me.

I despaired at the reality that I’d be living for the rest of my life alongside Prince Freddie.

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