Reincarnated as the God of Shitty Life Counseling for Defective Washed Up Waifus

Chapter 75: Consultation 75.


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Consultation 75.

“Can I call you Daddy?”

“...”

“Daddy. Hey. Can I?”

“...”

“Daddy?”

“I’m not your Daddy! Don’t you ever call me that!!”

“Ehhhh~ Why not, Daddy?”

“I said. Stop. Calling. Me. Your. Daddy!”

“Daddy. Daddy Daddy.”

I lowered my head and started to gently hit my forehead against the top of my desk.

“What’s wrong, Daddy?”

“What did you actually book this consultation for? Did you come here just to piss me off?”

“No, I came here to ask if I can call you Daddy. That is my only request.”

“You mean you paid all that money just for a request this stupid?”

“It’s not stupid, Daddy. I want a God Daddy.”

“Wait… what?”

“I want a God Daddy.”

“By any chance did you mean Godfather?”

“It’s the same thing, isn’t it?”

“...”

“It’s not?”

“It’s not.”

“What! How is it different, Daddy?”

“A Godfather would be a man who presents a child at baptism and promises to take responsibility for their religious education.”

“Isn’t that the same thing as a God Daddy?”

“Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. AHHH! Stop calling me that! It’s gross. I don’t have any children. And no it’s not the same thing at all! A God Daddy would essentially be a God who is your father. See? Godfather has a different definition.”

She looked at me like I was the weird one and said, “Ehhhhh? That doesn’t make any sense, Daddy. You should just concede and accept that you’re my Daddy.”

“You are no daughter of mine.” The last thing I want is a daughter who I might see on GodTok or GodlyFans or their human equivalents in the future.

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“How about we make a deal, Daddy?”

“What?”

“How about I call you Daddy and you can call me your beloved daughter in return?”

“Fuck off! Do words not get through that thick skull of yours?” I clawed at my desk in frustration.

“Daddy, why don’t you just give up?”

“Kkkkkkkkkkk.”

“Daddy.”

“STOP!”

“Daddy.”

Bang. Bang. Bang. 

I started to kick the desk underneath the table.

“Daddy.”

“FUCK! I get it! I get it! Okay? You can call me Daddy under one condition.”

“Oh! I can? What’s the condition, Daddy?”

“Never…”

“Never what?”

“Never become a TikTok or GodTok influencer… or create a GodlyFans or OnlyFans account... only then can you call me Daddy.”

“Eh? But the entire reason I wanted to call you Daddy was so I could make this TikTok video.”

“AHHHHHHHHHHHH! GET OUT! NOW!”

“Buuuu. Fine. It seems Daddy is having a midlife crisis. I’ll come back another time.” She pulled out her phone and held it up while I still had my head face down on the desk. She struck a peace sign before she started Flossing(the dance). It was my worst nightmare materializing before me.

Before I knew it, I was screaming out at the top of my lungs, louder than ever before. “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

The next thing I knew, I momentarily blacked out. Immediately after, my eyes shot open wide as I stood up in a panic. 

“Hah… Hah… Hah… Hah…” Out of breath, I looked around the room fearfully, but to my relief, there was no one in sight. The chair opposite to me was pushed in and it felt like no one had ever been here the entire time.

I let out a long sigh of relief and said, “Haaaaaaah. It was just a dream? Phew. Thank Go- me.”

I sat down in my chair and slumped back like a slug. I took out my phone to check the time, but immediately froze when I saw a text on the display. There was... a video attached. Mortified, I turned off my phone, put it away, and acted like I saw nothing. It was best to not know. 

As they say, ignorance is bliss.

Out of nowhere, a shiver ran down my back. I spun around in my chair frantically, fearful that I’d find her standing there ready to call out to me the same way she had before. Thankfully, there was no one there. It had just been my on-edge nerves.

That was single-handedly one of my scariest clients yet. As I thought, I can’t let my guard down around these sorts of crazy women. TikTok and OnlyFans women are absolutely batshit crazy. I classified them as being among the ranks of my most disturbing clients.

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