Chapter 111: 05. The villain

“Marriage.”

Raymond couldn’t see Carynne’s reaction. Even so, he vaguely imagined that Carynne would react positively. Or, perhaps dazed. But truly, as she was in Raymond’s embrace, Carynne was frowning. Because this was too cliché. This time again, it’s like that. That’s all she thought.

For Carynne, Raymond’s marriage proposal was nothing special. So, she felt no excitement. Having been proposed to by the same man dozens upon dozens of times, it was difficult to be filled with admiration with the way things were.

‘I’m annoyed.’

But this time, she felt quite strange. Carynne herself was a little surprised by her own feelings.

Why? Ever since the proposals went over the double digits, the only thing left was boredom. But what she felt now was a bit different.

At first, Raymond looked at Carynne with a cold stare that she had never seen before—but then, his attitude towards her changed too quickly.

Had it not been too long ago since he was still silently interrogating her with that suspicion laced in the look of his eyes? As expected, there’s a problem with Sir Raymond as well.

Carynne sighed as she noticed the slight excitement in Raymond’s voice.

What in the world was on his mind? But nevertheless, he proposed again in this iteration.

In this life, Raymond proposed to Carynne, and his decision was sincere. It wasn’t just something that’s said through words, but there would be a document to prove it.

This was probably love.

* * *

With wide eyes, Lady Lianne gaped at the piles of stationery in front of Carynne.

“Wow…”

“Haa…”

Carynne sighed. Before her was the schedule of the wedding and the list of people to send invitations to. The fact that she couldn’t see the end to this made her increasingly annoyed.

“There’s so many. Will all these people come?”

“I believe so.”

“Prince Lewis as well?”

“Perhaps.”

Since it’s come to this.

“I should ask Mother if I can get a fitting for a new dress right away! Carynne, can I be your bridesmaid?”

“I’d be honored if you could. Still, we have to get Madam Elva’s permission first.”

“I’ll make sure that we get it!”

Dododo. Lady Lianne ran out, her steps resounding. In her haste, her steps became undignified, but she was cheerful the way she was.

As the child left the room, Donna approached carefully.

“…Lady Carynne, aren’t you happy that you’ll be getting married?” Donna asked.

“Does it show?”

“…Yes, a little.”

Carynne was losing patience. Even if a child couldn’t see it, and adult would definitely notice.

Lamenting the way her patience was slowly running out, Carynne replied.

“I don’t quite know.”

Carynne answered frankly.

She’s not Raymond. Neither was she Dullan. There was no reason to deceive her.

Donna comforted Carynne by bringing her a cup of hot tea.

“It’s probably because it’s my first time.”

No, it’s because she had been married one too many times.

But without saying anything more, Carynne pushed all the papers on the desk to the side and lay face down on the surface.

“My head is spinning…”

This time, too.

Carynne struggled with boredom, but at the same time, with the knowledge of what’s to come after the wedding. This time, too, he was no different. It’s similar in this iteration as well. Again, Raymond proposed to Carynne in a way that she couldn’t understand. Yes, she couldn’t understand, but that was, perhaps, not what she should be preoccupied with right now. It’s the list in her hands right now that needed to be dealt with.

“It’s only because you have much to think about, Milady. If His Lordship and the Madam were alive, they would have helped you a lot…”

“Would they?”

“Of course. If His Lordship was alive, how much would they have… hiic.”

Carynne lifted her teacup and sipped it gratefully. All the while, she was ignoring how Donna sobbed quietly to herself.

“The Madam as well…”

If what she was holding right now was a brandy glass, she would have thrown hands while shouting, ‘Goddamnit, Mother! You should have done the responsible thing before leaving!’ But then, what spilled onto her tongue was tea instead.

Cough, cough.

“M-Milady, are you alright?”

Carynne waved one hand, stopping Donna from reaching out to her. She felt a bit embarrassed.

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“…Yes, it would have been different if Mother was here.”

This task was something parents should do. Carynne recalled the memories of her first time getting married, back when she saw the mountain of work that she was set to do. The oath of marriage was to be done amidst a gathering of numerous people—soldiers, nobles, royalty. After that, the relationship could neither be called a temporary relationship, nor a snare in which you’d be trapped.

“Everything’s so annoying…”

Carynne did not believe in other people’s vows, just as much as she couldn’t believe in her own feelings. She had gotten involved with countless men, but less than a tenth of them had proposed to her. And the men who actually held the ceremony with her and even signed the documents could be counted with two measly fingers. Marriage was a danger to men, too.

“Still, Milady, aren’t you happy that you’ll be marrying Lord Raymond?”

Carynne looked down at the table once more, thinking about the things she had to do. Wedding preparations, which she had to suffer through dozens of times, was nothing but tiresome and annoying. She hung her arm.

She was well aware. A man like Raymond was extremely rare.

“I know he’s a decent man.”

Yes, she knew. No one knew better than Carynne. Objectively speaking, she knew that he was a decent groom. Regardless of his appearance and personality, it would be difficult to find a man as good as him.

She couldn’t remember the plot of the novel all that well anymore, but Carynne made this judgement based on her own memories. Wasn’t that why Verdic chose Raymond for his daughter? Even though Raymond did not choose Isella.

“But I don’t think I’m happy.”

Because time would not flow.

Nothing would come to fruition from their marriage. Their emotions would not move forward. First meeting, confession, proposal—over and over, until… death. Rinse and repeat.

After two people would become husband and wife, and declare this to society, there was nothing left. Oh, however, this was a fact applicable only to Carynne. Not to others. After that instant, the others would remain. Was this not enough to prove true love? Carynne did not know what would be better to do.

Marriage had its own risks. It was an oath that held significantly more weight compared to the promise of engagement. Carynne thought of the men who she had gotten married to—one of them was Dullan.

“Mother must have experienced the same thing before she got married.”

She must not have believed in love. She must not have known who to choose for her to be enveloped by the grace of death.

Thanks to Carynne’s father, she knew that unconditional love was not the answer. But then, why did Dullan mention true love? When Raymond proposed to Carynne, could his feelings be quantifiable?

“Fall in love, sincerely.”

“In that case.”

“I will help you.”

“…He might surrender once the kiss at the wedding takes place.”

Or would that not be enough? Carynne twirled a lock of her hair.

Perhaps, if she were to make a show out of the first night and make him watch, he just might die of a heart attack. Ah, no, it might be a kink of his.

“Lord Dullan? Do you still keep in touch with him, Milady?”

The maid panicked at that moment, but in response, Carynne winked and whispered to her.

“Don’t tell Raymond.”

Donna’s face turned as pale as a sheet. Entirely shocked, Donna asked.

“What? Really?”

“It’s a secret.”

And then, Donna’s face turned pink when she realized that Carynne was teasing her.

Carynne then smiled at the maid, but she turned her gaze back to the work that’s before her.

“As for the dress, Countess Elva said that she’d introduce me to someone, so I can take that off the to-do list…”

But Carynne trailed off as she turned away.

“What’s wrong, Milady?”

“Ah, those flowers. Wait.”

Carynne saw the flowers that Donna had raised. It was the bouquet of flowers that Raymond gave her as he roused her earlier this morning. In fact, it was the same kind of flower that he gave her on any other day. They weren’t any different. If she were to look closer, they might be a little bigger—but just a little.

“Milady, shall I put these flowers in a vase? Or should I dry them right away?”

“…Just put them in a vase.”

They didn’t matter all that much anyway.

Which would be faster, for the flowers to wither, or for Carynne to die?

“Do you still feel quite low, Milady?”

“Does it look like that?”

“…Yes, it looks like you’re conflicted.”

Donna replied cautiously.

Towards her nervous maid, Carynne gave a forced smile. She waved her hand to dismiss the thought.

“It’s just that it feels strange to think that I’ll soon be married.”

Whether she liked it or not, ‘that day’ was approaching.

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