Chapter 190: Chapter 190: –

Darkness spirals around me as I spin and fall down, dragged through the void by a demon claw that wrenches me back towards the world below. Rushing, howling cosmic winds envelop me from the speed of my descent. Like a jubilant star crashing down towards terra firma, I fall, enveloped by blinding light as I plummet. My core, my essence radiating with a burning heat that repels the empty of the void as we fall further. Further. Further still down towards the dungeon. But as I fall, as we fall, my perspective doesn’t shift. I don’t awaken to new eyes. I simply fall and fall and fall and fall. I see nothing but black-water. I feel nothing but the clawing hand dragging me through the murk and the biting winds on my core. I see nothing but the haunting eyes of a thing that skitters, staring down at me from far, far above. From up there in the blackness beyond the light of any star or god.

 

Here in limbo, where there is nobody here but me.

 

  I don’t understand. I don’t understand. My hands spiral around me, reaching for anything, grasping for anything, anyone. I see, but I don’t understand. But there is nothing as I fall, there is nothing here but me. But me. But me and ten thousand eyes that hound me through the cosmos. Ten thousand eyes with just as many skittering legs, ticking and tacking as they run after me with their sharp little spindly feet that dance against my eyes. I don’t understand. I fall.

 

It skitters.

 

  Eyes open themselves all around me. Self-illuminated as the only things visible in the wretched darkness of limbo, the darkness of the bardo, as I fall. Eyes the size of my own. Eyes the size of a human’s. Eyes the size of a fairy’s. Of a hydra’s. All of them filled with radiant splendor, all of them filled with radiant souls, all of them watching me as I fall, as I spiral. Only my eyes are filled with terror, are filled with truth. Only my eyes can see. Only my eyes can SEE AND I STILL DON’T UNDE-

 

*Khkhkraaak*

 

My bones crack as my body spasms against the stone floors. I see. I see. I see. I see. I see -

 

*Kchraaach*

 

I see. I see. I see -

 

Metal rattles against the stones below as my limbs flail around like strange worms, as my hands rattle around inside of the metal. As my fingers claw at my eyes that are no longer there. I see. I see. I see. I see -

 

Breath comes and leaves my body a thousand-fold over as I writhe on the floors. It hurts. I scream, but no words come out. I see. I see -

 

A metal hand reaches, slapping itself out against the stones as I reach out further. As I reach. As I reach. As I reach just a little bit higher, just a little bit higher. Just a little bit further towards the apex of the world so that I can SEE.

 

  My shoulders spasm as the power that weaves my bones together pulls tightly, like it were pulling on the strings holding a doll’s joints together. I shake and I rattle, my body twitching and jolting together as if I were a man shivering with a deathly chill, as I rise, as I rise and see. As I open my eyes and scream. As I feel it. I feel it. I feel it. I feel it in my eyes. IN MY EYES!

 

I fall over forward, crawling. Metal rattles as I lurch, as I scream. No words come out. No words come out. All that comes out are screams. Are SCREAMS. I WANT TO GO. I WANT TO GO. I WANT TO GO -

 

My hands jam themselves into the hollow sockets of my head as I dig, as I look for my eyes. They’re in there, but I can’t touch them. I can’t feel them, but I see. I see. I see -

 

Another hand slaps out as I crawl another step forward. It hurts. It hurts. It’s in my brain. It’s itching. It’s itching. It’s itching.

 

  My shoulders crack as my body is jolted back upright, my spine popping into place as my skull is wrenched back into position. But my hands still clench my hollow eye sockets as my head is pulled back as well and my body spans taut, as my gaze raises towards the ceiling. The scream never stops. The scream leaving my mouth never stops. I’m here alone again. I’m here. Alone again. I’m here. Alone again. But it’s here too. It’s here too. It’s here too and it’s going BMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM-

 

My body spasms again and my waist cracks, popping into place as something reconnects my joints. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. Hurtssss Hurtsssss- sss

 

Sss-

 

Sssss-

 

Ssss-un

 

Sun-

 

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Sun-

 

Sun-

 

  My arms flail out of my control, slapping against the metal breastplate as I rise up onto my feet, lurching over forward, my body unable to hold itself upright against the weight of my armor. Unable to look towards the sun. The sun. The sun. It lives in darkness. It lives in darkness. In the black-water. In the black-water. My legs crack as the pulverized bones are compressed together by the unseen hand of some cosmic entity. I’m so sick of telling you. Why won’t you listen. I claw, I reach. It’s in the water. It’s the water.

 

I look around. Everything is blue. Everything is corrupted. Everything is tainted. Stained. Stained. Stained. My armor rattles as I turn to look. It’s all tainted. It’s all befouled.

 

My eyes go wide.

 

Befouled.

 

BEFOULED!

 

My arm cracks as something grabs it and pulls it outward to my side, popping the joints from my shoulder down to each of my fingers back into place.

 

  Guy. Guy. Guy. Guy. Look at my eyes. Look AT MY EYES. Do you see it too? Purple. Purple. Purple. The sun is gold. The sun is red. But when the sun sets and twilight comes, the world is purple. When the eyes of the night open, it’s purple. When the people lay their heads down to sleep, for the night their hearts safe to keep, it’s purple. The nightmares in their restless dreams, when they see with closed eyes. The thing. The thing. The thing. The thing. The thing-

 

  My other arm is wrenched up into the air. The bone that was snapped in half comes together, fusing back into one whole piece. The fingers of my good hand clutch something behind myself, something that billows. Something that waves around with movements that are so sussurant. The sun is in my eyes. The sun is in my eyes. And I can see it. I can see it. I see. I see…

 

My fingers grasp the cloth and I pull it around, looking at the fabric of the cape that I hold in the shaking gauntlets that are my hands. I see. I see -

 

My eyes gaze down towards my legs, towards my waist and towards the rattling purple armor. With fearful, shaking grip I push my breastplate aside and look down beneath the rim of cloth on my waist.

 

I see UNDERPANTS.

 

I clutch my face and howl with laughter.

 

They’re purple, of course. I’m a man of taste, after all.

 

  My body cracks once from top to bottom as a wave of energy ripples through my core. Dust falls from my bones as I turn my head to look around the hero-grave that has been entirely consumed by the blue fungus. It’s everywhere. Every crevice, wall and crack is full of it. The once bleak, destroyed cavernous chamber resembles a luminescent meadow now. Fuzz covers the walls. Covers the ground. Fuzz covers everything. I let go of my beautiful, beautiful cape and bend down low, getting a feel for my body.

 

The lance rips free as I pull it out from the growth starting to overtake it, like a forest growing over old ruins. I rip it free from the roots that snap with disgustingly clear pops and tears and I look at it. And it looks at me, asking me "Why? Why? Why?" My eyes narrow in disgust as I look at it. Why? What else is there to do?

 

I’ve got to believe in something.

 

  The blade of the heavy lance lets out a thunderous clap as I let it fall down against the stones, the shaft held tightly in my grasp, as I look around and as I walk and make my way out of the hero-grave. My eyes are open. My boots thud out loudly with every step and with each step I take the next one come quicker, until I find myself running. Until I find myself chasing, hounding, screaming as I sprint through the dungeon. As I run through the darkness, sparks fly out around me from the lance scraping against the rock as I barrel my way towards the moonlight-arena. Even if I’ve never saved anyone. Even if everything I’ve done has failed and even if my EYES SEE THE WORLD FOR WHAT IT IS-

 

I’m still going to go down towards that place. I’m still going to try to save her. I’m going to try to save them, guy. My hand grasps the lance tightly as my eyes shine with CONVICTION.

 

We’ve got to believe in something.

 

 

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