Chapter 229: Green-Eyed Monster

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~ SASHA ~

Sasha was shocked to silence for a moment. It was the first time Zev had spoken to her sharply.

She sat back and held his gaze. "I was talking with Lhars overnight. While you slept. It was a difficult time, and he was kind enough to stand guard for you, outside. All night," she said pointedly.

Zev's jaw just twitched. "Talking?"

"Yes, talking," she said firmly. "I asked him to arrange some meetings for me, and I was getting his input on my own… ideas. The way I'm hoping to move forward. He knows the councils and the people. He's been here while we've been gone—and from a position of leadership. He's a great resource, Zev. And he wants to see us succeed."

"Us? Or you?"

"Zev, seriously? Since when are you this kind of jealous?"

He glared at her, his eyes dark, brows heavy. Sasha wasn't sure whether to laugh, or snap at him. "Zev," she sighed. "Seriously, what's going on?"

"You're mine," he said quietly, his good hand fisted in the furs. "You can't… I won't let him—or anyone—try to take you—"

"Trust me, that wasn't what was going on," she said dryly. "C'mon, Zev, you know you can trust me."

"It's not you I don't trust," he growled. "Do I need to remind you what we just went through with Xar?"

A flash in her head, gripping that rock, slamming it into the older man's skull, the bone caving under her hand—

"Xar was… losing his mind. You told me that yourself."

Zev nodded. "Yet he had his supporters—my brother was his second!"

"And planning to defect with the wolves. You told me that yourself. Lhars helped me, Zev. He helped you! Trust me, he has no interest in me for a mate."

"He displayed for you—challenged me for you!"

"He was challenging you to make a show, to give you a chance to step up the hierarchy, Zev. You told me yourself, he was helping you!"

Zev closed his mouth, his lips tight and thin. "You're right," he mumbled a second later. "But… but you have to see, Sasha… this connection we have. It drives me. Literally drives me. Even the idea of another male's hands on you… it makes my skin itch!"

Sasha sighed, holding his gaze. "Zev," she said carefully, "I really think Lhars has a good heart."

Zev grimaced. "Maybe. Probably. But that's not the point. You're a desirable female, Sasha, you need to understand that."

"You told me the Chimera would touch me now that we'd had the public declaration!"

"That's exactly my point—I said no male in his right mind would touch you. And yet, here we are! My brother should have been keeping his distance!"

"He did," Sasha said simply. "I didn't."

Zev froze, gaping at her.

Sasha groaned and put a hand on his arm. It was tense. A steel bar under her palm. She stroked it with her thumb.

"Not that way," she said quietly. "We talked a great day. Your brother is hurting on a lot of levels, Zev. And he's trying to help you, even though he hurts. I comforted hi as a friend."

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"Why the hell would you do that? Since when is Lhars your friend?"

"Since he told me what I needed to hear, not what was easy. And since he helped you."

"And that meant you needed to touch him?"

"Yes!"

"Why?!"

"Because that's who I am, Zev. And your brother was the one who snapped his fingers in front of my face and said if I'm going to be successful here, among the Chimera, that I have to stop apologizing and own who I am. Be who I am, even if it's different. I have to make my decisions, then walk them out, regardless of what others think."

"I told you that, too! I believe that!"

"Good. Then this is me, doing that, Zev," she said firmly, folding her arms.

"But—"

"No buts. I'm someone who cares about people, Zev. I reach out and I want to help. And if they're helping me, I'm even more invested in making sure they're taken care of. But no one is ever going to touch my heart—or my body—like you do. So relax. Your brother needed a hug, even though he didn't know it. So I gave him one."

"YOU HUGGED HIM?" Zev tried to sit up, and grunted, his hands fisting in the furs as he closed his eyes and breathed through the pain.

Sasha was not impressed. "Seriously, Zev? You think because we bonded I'm suddenly, what, a possession you can just withhold from other people?"

"No!" he growled through his teeth, eyes still closed against the pain. "Of course not."

"Then grow up."

"This isn't an issue of being juvenile," he spat, then took a breath and opened his eyes to find hers. "The new bond is… it makes me hyper-aware of you, Sash. Drives me to keep you safe."

"You can't expect me not to meet with and talk to men. Apparently, I'm alpha! And that's virtually all that's here! I am going to have to talk to males, Zev. Meet with them. Eat with them. Be around them, and—"

"There is no need for you to be comforting them," he growled. Then his entire body shuddered, and despite the heat of anger in his gaze, a pleading fear was there as well.

Sasha took a deep breath as she watched him fight for control.

This whole time had been hard for both of them. And she could feel him through the bond, feel his tension and his fear… Was it fair to criticize him for feelings?

Sasha unfolded her arms and leaned forward onto the bed, one hand to the center of his chest, the other in his hair. "No one has me like you do, Zev," she sad quietly.

Zev brought up his good hand pulled her down into a searing kiss. She returned it deeply. And deep within her, she felt that light, that heat, fizzing in her veins, and driving her heart forward, towards him.

She broke the kiss, but pressed her forehead against his, her fingers tight in his hair.

I can't do this with anyone but you, Zev, she said in his head. You have my heart. Feel it. Feel me.

Zev sighed. I can, he sent back, flattening his hand over hers on his chest, their hearts beating in time. And you have mine.

Sasha sighed, relaxing into him.

But that doesn't mean I want you touching my brother, he rumbled in her head.

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