Chapter 4: 4. Dinner

3 years had passed since that wondrous day. I still yearned to learn magic, but every time I asked Alaya to teach me, she brushed me off. The only thing that I got out of her was that I should start meditating, as good control over my own emotions would translate to better control over mana.

Having no reason not to believe my trustworthy maid, I started incorporating meditation exercises into my daily routine. 20 minutes as soon as I woke up and 20 minutes before I went to sleep. I hadn’t particularly noticed being more in control of my feelings than I was before, but it did help me stay relaxed.

Other than that, I had been training my body and mind. I played around with Elly and occasionally joined her in swordsmanship practice for some casual training, since putting harsh stress on my premature body could have been counterproductive.

The time spent training was definitely worth it though, I could already feel it paying off as my coordination had gotten a lot better. My body was also a lot stronger than it was 3 years ago, at that point I could pretty much move on my own and didn't need a babysitter to save me from tripping or hurting myself.

For my mind, I had mostly been busy reading a ton of books with Alaya and sometimes with Elly. I remembered Alaya's reaction to my learning speed like it was yesterday.

A month ago, I felt like I had pretty much grasped the written part of the country's language and decided to read out loud to improve my pronunciation. Alaya was baffled, her eyes widening in amazement “Oh my goodness, that was perfect! We must show his lordship, he will be thrilled to have a bright young mind in his household.”

I did cringe at her mentioning my father, but thinking back on it, perhaps she was right? If the marquis saw value in me, he might have been inclined to throw resources at me or give me more options, maybe let me learn magic early or even find someone capable to teach me?

Though I was somewhat unsure if he would care at all, seeing as he never acknowledged me whenever I came across him in the mansion. Not that it happened often, but still. Then again, he didn't acknowledge the maids and butlers either. Perhaps that was just how he is?

Anyways, today was probably the best day so far to bring it up with him. A special day, I thought to myself as I inspected myself in the mirror. My deep black hair flowed down my shoulders to my back, framing my face and my bright grey eyes. Proof that I am his daughter. Below that, I was wearing the midnight blue dress that Alaya had gotten for me for today. The intricate lace and golden embroidery on the dress were a testament to its craftsmanship.

I had thought about putting on some accessories, like a necklace or earrings, but I decided not to in the end. It would have looked weird on me and I also didn't want to look ostentatious. Elly wasn't wearing any either.

As I was inspecting my outfit for the last time before thinking about what was to come, I noticed the reflection of Elly in my peripheral. Walking up behind me, she put her hands on my shoulders and smiled as she checked my outfit “The dress suits you, mother would be proud.” She told me softly.

Feeling a sudden surge of emotions inside of me, I just nodded with a bright smile, not trusting my voice as my eyes started glistening with tears.

Her smile vanished, “Are you ready?" she asked me unsually serious.

Loosing my bright smile i matched her energy as my eyes flashed with determination, "As ready as i'll ever be."

 

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As my sister and I entered the dining room, my sister infinitely more confident than me, I couldn't help but feel nervous. She took the lead and greeted the head of the house. She curtsied, without bowing her head, and said, "Greetings Father, Stepmother, Stepbrother," as she looked each of them in the eye with an indifferent look.

Trying to follow my sister's lead, I hyped myself up, You can do this! As I stepped forward with uncertain steps, my legs felt like Jello from all the pressure in their gazes. I tried to imitate my sister and brought one foot behind the other, bent my knees, and lowered my body, keeping my back straight as I looked at the ground.

As I was shakily holding the position, preparing to greet them, I heard a distinct scoff. Must be stepmother. Sister warned me. I couldn't help but feel the heat rising to my cheeks. She is trying to make me nervous. Gritting my teeth, I stopped curtsying and made an effort to stand ramrod straight, glaring at her.

My brows furrowed and I did my best to hold eye contact with my hateful stepmother. Her mouth curved into an evil smirk. "Is that the best you can do?" she said in a disdainful tone, "I expected more from a child of noble blood."

I swallowed hard.

Her son held his hand in front of his mouth, annoying snickering sounds coming from him. "She is so stupid, Mom," he said in his ear-grating high voice, "why is such a loser allowed to eat with us?"

My sister stomped furiously and shouted, "Don't you dare insult my sister, you piec-!"

"Enough!" I flinched as my father shook the room with his voice. He glared at the young boy who didn't dare meet his gaze. With down-turned lips and furrowed eyebrows, he held the glare for what felt like an eternal moment.

He said slowly, pronouncing every word, "Are you insinuating that my blood would produce incompetence?" His voice was cold as ice.

Schooling his expression to an emotionless mask, he continued, "Do you doubt my blood as well?" As the light began flickering, shadows creeping, his voice echoed through the room, "The blood of my ancestors?" he whispered in an obsessed tone.

As stepmother opened her mouth, he shot her a warning look and turned his head back to his quivering son, piercing him with his ice-cold stare. "Watch. Your. Tone. Boy." he said in a dark, foreboding voice.

As the tension in the room was palpable, the marquis turned his sight towards me and inspected me. Coming to my defense, my sister put her hand on my shoulder and stared defiantly at him. Meeting his gaze, I tried to put on a brave expression that probably came out as looking anxious. I tried to hold my ground. Nodding, and seemingly coming to a conclusion, "Sit." he declared.

My sister took my hand and we sat opposite his wife and son. My father sat at the head of the table, between Elly and stepmother. Taking the silver tableware into his hands, he ordered in his deep voice, "Eat." We started eating in uneasy silence, concentrating on the food.

I cautiously took a bite of the food in front of me. It was some kind of meat I had never seen before, but my caution was unwarranted as the flavors burst in my mouth and I couldn't help but close my eyes in delight. This stuff is amazing! The atmosphere at the table was tense as my stepbrother kept glaring at me, but I tried ignoring it and focused on enjoying my food, savoring each bite.

Despite the daggers that my stepbrother was shooting me, I felt comforted, knowing he couldn't do anything as long as my sister was close. But even though I had the support of Elly next to me, I couldn't find the courage in me to breach the subject of my fast learning.

Too scared to break the fragile balance, I remained silent and ate my food as my father inquired about Elly’s swordsmanship and studies, seemingly pleased as he nodded all the way. Perhaps next time. I told myself, knowing it might not happen anytime soon.

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