Chapter 81: ——~(75)~——

"Sometimes...

Your heart needs more time to accept what your mind already knows."

-Unknown

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Bakugo seemed to... choke on thin air.

Deku, on the other hand, smiled grimly.

"So it was indeed the case. You know, I always felt it was rather... strange. Even the most weak-minded, adaptable person wouldn't have the ability to change the very core of themselves as fast as you have shown yourself to do, and you are the farthest thing from that, I'd say. You are very stubborn and prideful. For you to so easily disregard your attachment to very ideas that makeup yourself and remake them from scratch, just for some idiot you never cared for? It's nigh impossible. I'm sure you've changed somewhat, but... Bakugo Katsuki, I can say with almost absolute certainty that you've woven a lie so good you fell for it too."

His words were haunting and grim, but there was an indescribable, magnetic tone to his voice that enraptured a listener's attention regardless.

(Even if they didn't want to listen-)

"Bakugo, no, Kacchan. To put it as simply as I can... You don't like me. You hate me. And that's fine."

(-his words were the whispers of the devil itself.)

"I hate you too."

Bakugo couldn't say a single word in response, as he simply stood there, with a blank look on his face.

He didn't even know how to react.

But it was certain enough that those few words that he had uttered had already thrown his mind into a deep turmoil, so much so that each thought blended into the next and mashed up all together in one big mess as they all collided at the same time.  He was truly confused. Was-... Was it truly like that..? Did he really do all of this out of some goddamn sense of guilt?! (The one thing that really scared him was that he couldn't say without a shadow of a doubt that 'No, it's because I care about you, you dumbass' and 'You're being ridiculous, of course, it's not all just a lie'. He truly couldn't tell.)

Deku slowly craned his body up into a sitting position, clicking his tongue in irritation at the still present tug of metal upon his wrist, but it was long enough to allow him to fully sit without an awkward incline.

Small mercies, he supposed. It was nice to focus on those, rather than the obviously bad parts; if he couldn't do this much, he would have long collapsed under the weight of his life.

"Well, you've got your answer. Would you please stop bothering me from this point forward? I realize that you're doing it because you feel guilty, but it's honestly better for me if I never see you ever again. Unfortunately for you, my little feelings still haven't gotten over it," He smiled a smile that was bitter to the taste; the pain of the zesty lemon could only make you pucker up and it oddly made you want to cry. "I'm not sure they ever will. But still, that's beside the point. If possible, I'd like to go through this as calmly and maturely as possible. So, what do you say, Kacchan?"

"You-... I-... What..?"

He was still the very essence of calm.

"You don't need to answer immediately. Feel free to fully process and think this through," His eyes became frothy. "However, don't expect me to treat you with the same... patience that I'm giving you now, if you refuse to leave me alone and let the past be the past. I didn't get it either, at first. I thought that because I had committed sins far worse than your tiny little brain could ever imagine, that I had to forgive you. Help you, even. But I know better now; the past can just be the past. I don't have to forgive it, I don't owe anyone my forgiveness, but I can forget it. You never killed anyone, after all; it'd be foolish to take your life in turn."

All Might simply sat there, his lips parting as he attempted to utter a single word, but he ultimately closed them with a vengeance.

He was a true outsider in this, and while he wasn't exactly sure what was going on, it wouldn't be a smart choice to intrude with little to no information.

Besides... He felt like this was one of the more mature ways this conversation of theirs could have proceeded.

Of course for Bakugo, despite the very mature way that this was being handled, it didn't spare him any confusion in the slightest. Gradually, the idea that he was doing it out of guilt more than anything else was slowly gaining traction. With it, the feeling of nausea grew as well. If he really was just doing all of this because of some fucking guilt and had somehow repressed that fact deep inside himself so far he didn't even realize that it was there, what did that make him? ...Actually, what the hell did it matter if he was a scumbag? He never tried, never wanted to be some saint. He didn't care if people liked him or not. He didn't care if people were afraid of his face, or his admittedly... violent methodolgy. (Shouting 'Kill!' from the rooftops casted some doubt on your character, even if you never actually killed anyone, for petessakes.)

No, he didn't care for people at all. He just prioritized what he wanted and acted how he saw fit, because if you lived your entire life giving a damn about what extras thought about you, what was the point to that?

(Well, he cared about some people. His mom, for one. But he didn't like Izuku. He always felt that he was too soft for the real world, too naive, too nice. And because of that, he had and would never care for him. He could and does have guilt for what he did because there are just some lines you don't cross, and he knows that now. But that was just to the image of Izuku Midoriya. In practice, they were just too different; only sparks could rise from the clash of their egos head-on.)

Really, he just wanted to win. It was as simple as that. How had he forgotten that? He was so caught up in the minor details and the looming overhead problem that he forgot himself. It was true that he was guilty. It was also true that he bothered with Izuku Midoriya for solely that reason. He would acknowledge it. He wasn't some coward who would run away from the truth if he was aware of it. But still-...

He starred at Deku, a bizarre mash-up of emotions and apathy mixing and mingling in his gaze.

(It would never be truly black and white, after all. There might be a little smidgen of him that cared for him. But in the same token, it was also true that he hated him more.)

"...You're right. That's all it is."

He smiled.

"Good. Now I can truly hate you and the person that you are."

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---

{Achoo-!}

"How can lightning even sneeze?"

Gray shot Shittyroki with a death glare before she continued to sneeze.

The rest of the group looked on in amusement (it didn't look right because there was a bank up in flames behind them and an army of clones in the backdrop causing all kinds of chaos, but it was what it was,) with Toga slightly snickering as Twice argued the possibilities of it with himself. The four of them made one... an interesting group of musketeers; a talking lightning quirk serpent, a burnt pyromaniac, a bloodthirsty teenage girl, and a clinically insane, bipolar guy.

So yes.

Perfectly normal.

{-aooo! You-... You think I know?! Quirks are weird!}

"Says the quirk."

Gray ignored him with all the finesse of a long term sufferer of teasing.

{Anyway... I feel like something good happened. Like something that was festering for a long time was finally cut loose... The wound will be open, but now it can heal. How curious-... Wait, you damn bastards! Don't leave without me!}

---

"But I won't be able to follow the 'leave me alone' part. I still need to fix you."

Deku was incredulous at first, but rather quickly, veins started to throb on his forehead.

He sighed.

"Aren't you refreshingly scumbag-like? This is why no one likes you."

"And why should I care if a couple of nobody trash doesn't like me?"

He sighed. Again.

(He felt like he was seeing a big pattern in their future interaction-... No, he was getting rid of him. There was no need to notice patterns. Thank god for that.)

"Bakugo, I'm not going to interact with you if I have to. Which I don't," He paused, before a hint of something demonic seeped into his regular placid smile. "We've established by now that we both hate each other, correct? You don't need to fix me; you just need to assuage your guilt. If I prove a way for you to do that, will you leave me alone for good? Because, well... I'd rather not have to resort to option two."

He hesitated a bit, because everything wasn't that cut and dry, but eventually nodded his head.

That was the primary reason. If he got rid of that, the remaining garbage would be so insignificant that he wouldn't even bother to take it out.

Listening, and possibly following his proposal, wouldn't be all that bad.

(Dear god would he do anything to rid himself of this nauseating sense of - now identified - guilt.)

"Why, we can just have you own up to everything..."

His smile was positively devilish at this point.

"Take responsibility for all of it; the mocking, the abuse, and of course, my attempted suicide."

AN: Yep, this was always how I planned their relationship to end up.

I'm sure this pretty much satisfies everybody, and if you still want me to kill him... He's a teenager. They suck. But that shouldn't mean you have to go and kill someone who scratched your pinky toe (or worse, but the point still stands). This is how normal people do it. They reconcile, or at the very least, agree to hate each other and never see each other again.

Well, anyhow. Hope you like it.

 

 

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