Three years after the return home
Angharad didn't expect she would have to go to her father's funeral two months after Tabitha's, and yet there she was. She spent much too long angrily arguing with James that her Jewish father should not have a Christian funeral before taking on the arrangements herself, and she was tired and sad and just wanted to go home. It felt like something had scooped out of her insides.
She just wanted to be held. Nobody gave her hugs quite like her father did. Nobody ever would again.
The only bright spot on the horizon was Freya appearing outside the building, as if Angharad's longing had summoned her like magic.
"I'm sorry for your loss," Freya said.
Angharad clasped her hands tighter against each other and asked, "How did you know?"
"I keep tabs on everyone we came home with. I should have mentioned I spy on you before this."
"Thank you for watching me. I feel kind of touched, actually."
Freya tossed her purple-brown hair behind her shoulder and reached out a hand. "Do you want to get out of here?"
"Yes, actually," Angharad said. "That would be good. That would be really really good."
*
The empty parking lot Freya drove her to looked like something out of a dream, an almost surreal retro image of what America looked like.
They were quiet for a while, and then all her feelings came spilling out of Angharad in a vomit of grief, before it subsided into a sob, then a faint hiccup, and then just the sound of her breaths huffing warm against the skin of Freya's neck. Being held, exactly as she wanted. Freya's arms around her felt like the only thing keeping her tethered to the world.
"I'm happy it's you that came to get me," Angharad said. She turned her head to the side so she could lean against Freya's shoulder in a more comfortable way, and Freya changed her grip around Angharad's body. Angharad slipped closer, until she was sitting in Freya's lap, legs tucked up tight underneath herself, one shoe pressed against the glove box. "Thank you for rescuing me from James and his creepy blank-eyed wife and obnoxious kids."
"How creepy?"
"It's like there's nothing there behind her eyes. She's the same age I would be if I'd stayed here all this time instead of ending up in Zapville. And she bleaches her hair the same colour I did when I was 15. But she has no hobbies or interests of her own. It's like he had her tailor made in a lab for his boringly specific specifications. Like the human embodiment of a lab created gemstone, but nothing cool like synthetic garnet."
"I'm more like a lab created diamond," Freya said, voice light.
Angharad laughed. "Jin would probably find that offensive somehow. How is he?"
Freya's breath hitched. And then she took a long, slow breath while Angharad waited for her to speak.
"I don't know," Freya said, voice soft. "We broke up."
Angharad sat straight up in shock. "What? Why?"
Freya looked out the window, and as she blinked her eyelashes got steadily more damp. The world outside was fog, growing steadily more dark. Inside the car the air felt no less thick.
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"We wanted different things. It's the mature thing to do. I hate it."
Angharad pressed a hand to Freya's face. "Okay, well, if you're still interested, I would absolutely sleep with you now."
"That sounds good. Let's do that."
*
A week later and already James's lawyers were trying to contest the will. Between that and staring at the same textbook for hours, Angharad was so tired she could barely think.
She told her flatmate she was going on a snack run and found the nearest convenience store. The lights were an unflattering blue light and everything in the aisle was covered with too much plastic packaging. Water crackers and spicy trail mix, fruit cups and hard cheeses: she threw them all into her shopping basket.
Her debit card was declined at the counter. Insufficient funds. Her hands started to shake as she opened her wallet again to try another card. And again, declined.
Her lungs filled with panic. Did she make a mistake? Did she check her bank details on a public network somehow? Did she use her phone in front of a camera? How could she possibly have done something so careless?
She left the food on the counter and stumbled outside. Someone grabbed her from behind. The world went dark.
*
When the darkness lifted from her vision James was the first thing she saw, just as she expected.
"There you are," he said. "Don't fight it. I made sure they drug you so you don't hurt yourself."
"Why... Why would you..." It was hard to speak. Her mouth was full of drool and her tongue was no longer the right size.
"You always think you're so smart, Angharad. Smart people are the easiest to fool because they never see it coming. They never think anyone will beat them. But you're not that bright. I hired someone smarter than you to fix this problem."
She tried to struggle but her hands were bound.
"Careful," he said. "I'll untie you later but you have to promise to be good. All I care about is this family and taking care of this family. I'll protect you from yourself. I'm the head of the family now. It's my job to be in charge and your job to accept it."
*
Her life became tray meals shoved under the door and every day pleading with James to change his mind and let her go. Just another trap, even tighter than all the traps she'd been in before.
"Just stop, Angharad," James said, shoving her back into the room. "This is for your own good."
Deep down she knew he believed it. He'd somehow convinced himself he was the hero of this story.
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