Chapter 90: 90 And Afterwards You Wake Up, Part Three

In the hospital hallway, Jin grabbed Angharad's sleeve and pulled her around to look at him. Just looking at him made her want to hit something, but she wasn't going to. That was not the kind of choice she would let herself make.

"Why can't you do the responsible thing and rein in your strength, Jin?" she asked.

"I'm not sorry," he said.

"You're never sorry for anything!"

"He hurt Tabitha and should have to suffer for it. He ruined her life."

Angharad clenched her fists so hard it hurt. "He ruined her life? Him? He broke her arm. You killed her father. Think about which one of you did more to ruin her life."

"So what? She killed people I knew."

"Why does that give you the right to hit Tsuyoshi?"

She turned around to check on him, but Tsuyoshi was already gone. Nothing took up space in the hallway but she and Jin and their stupid argument

"You never apologise for anything, either!" Jin yelled.

"I didn't ask you to rescue me." It was easier to calm down her voice when she didn't have to look him in the eye.

"You need me to rescue you all the time. You're reckless and delicate and..."

"Rescue me from physical danger when you have to. Do your action hero thing. I have no feelings of shame about needing that help some times. But don't try to rescue me from difficult conversations. I handle those way better than you can."

She could hear him breathing heavy behind her, turning the air around them hot.

"Fine," he said. "Fine. I'm going for a walk to clear my head."

They manoeuvred around each other with ease as they went in their different directions.

*

Early morning a few days later found Angharad at the edge of camp, surveying the border once again. She took notes, trying to figure out anything she could about it. Whatever she observed she noted down, whether it made sense or not, whether it seemed relevant or not. She and Freya were hard at work again, ever since they'd moved into Tabitha's room. At the end of each day they compared notes in the cafeteria with Jin, Mnemosyne and Maria. Sometimes Antoine would be there when his wound wasn't hurting too much. Even if they didn't understand what any of it meant, at least it felt like they were doing something.

The cool light of the morning was still grey over the camp as she walked through the cool, clear air. The only sounds in her world were the buzzing of the barrier and the slight rasp of her own breath as she stopped for a moment to make a note. There was a rainbow ripple like an oil stain in a spot behind the hospital, and then it washed away into the rest of the electric field.

She'd never handwritten so many notes in her life.

She started walking again, checking the edges of the barrier as it got closer to what used to be the other side. Then beyond that, and the ground had a soft crunch beneath her feet. Some days it felt like there was something hard beneath the dirt and gravel, but she didn't know what that meant. Maybe she was imagining it – the bottom edges of the buildings didn't seem like they were on uncertain surfaces, even when she heard them settling in the night.

She was so distracted by the barrier that she didn't hear the second step of footsteps until she walked right into the back end of the industrial field.

She shoved her notebook and pen into the jacket she was wearing – the jacket borrowed from Freya, because it looked surprisingly cute with a mini and tights and had tons of pockets – and felt at her belt for the thing that was supposed to be clipped there.

The footsteps didn't stop, so she moved forward, not looking back. It was at that moment she realised she'd left the walkie talkie in her room, where it was completely useless to her.

She turned around.

Of course it was Neo. Who else would be following someone like a creep at seven in the morning? Who needed robots that raised the dead to scare people when there were living creeps like him just hanging around, waiting until someone was alone?

He didn't say anything as he followed her.

She stumbled back and then whirled around, diving between the machines. One started itself up. Of course it did, the whole place wanted to make sure they knew they were never safe. She almost wanted to laugh as she ducked around it, only sure how far away Neo was by the sound of his steps. He sped up. She wouldn't let herself panic or look back. She wouldn't talk about it. What was the point? Neo had nothing to say that she wanted to hear.

Another machine started up, and another, and then there were whirring and stomping noises. Why did they need a machine to press things down? What was all this for?

She wasn't going to fight back or test her strength against Neo. She wasn't an idiot. But the more she ran, the more the field turned into a maze. Angharad started to suspect that the floor plan of Zapville wasn't stable, that things moved around under their feet and changed where they were placed. That the hospital sometimes seemed larger than usual because things inside it moved around, expanded. That whether or not it was an illusion, it definitely wasn't safe.

How long had there been a metal beam laying on the ground?

She got so caught up trying to puzzle out the mysteries of Zapville that she lost her focus on the things around her and tripped over something else. Her knee hurt under her tights, but there was no time to pause and take a look.

"I will find you," Neo said. "You can't run forever."

She pushed herself up off the ground and sprang into one of the metal tubes. Oh, big mistake. It was big and dark and loud, her every step like a response to Neo's call.

And then something slammed shut, and the clear light at the other end of the tube she'd been running to disappeared. That was it, she was trapped.

"You can't get me," she said, under her breath, but at the other end of the tube Neo was already catching up, hand on one metal edge like he was ready to climb in.

"Oh, I can," he said.

"You don't want to do this," Angharad said, trying to sound reasonable instead of like she was pleading in fear. "I'm likeable. I have a lot of friends. If you hurt me, people are going to hurt you worse."

Neo started to step in. "Nobody's around. Who will know?"

"I will know, dumb ass," rang out loud and clear, Tsuyoshi's caustic voice like a beacon of hope.

*

Tsuyoshi grabbed Neo by the shoulder and ripped him away from the metal construct. Neo was smaller than Tsuyoshi expected. Had he been starving himself? Tsuyoshi didn't consider himself that strong. It shouldn't have been that easy to throw him around.

Neo rolled on the gravel and tried to stand up, but Tsuyoshi was ready with a kick to his side.

"I didn't do anything! I didn't do anything!" Neo screeched, in his small, annoying voice.

"Yet. You didn't do anything yet. Nobody here is stupid enough to think you weren't going to try."

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Neo tried to scramble upright, but Tsuyoshi held him down with a foot on his back. Neo kept struggling against the weight. Tsuyoshi's filthy Doc Martens won against the strength of Neo's back.

"Don't hurt me," Neo begged.

"Why not?" Tsuyoshi asked. "You were going to hurt her."

There was a chain on the ground. Convenient. Like he'd gained the camp's favour and it was providing the chain for Tsuyoshi's use. He knelt down, foot still keeping Neo in place, and grabbed at one of Neo's flailing hands so he could wrap it up.

"Because... Because the thing she said. I hear people talking about you. They'll say you've gone over the edge."

Tsuyoshi wrenched that hand behind Neo's back, and grabbed the other. "Over you? Nobody cares about you."

"Even if it's me. They'll turn on you."

Tsuyoshi slammed Neo's head on the ground and started to laugh. "They already have. I broke a girl's arm. I'm violent and dangerous. Why don't I prove people right?"

Tsuyoshi kicked Neo in the ribs again. And again, and Neo made a squeaking noise and started to cry.

Tsuyoshi knew Ibrahim was around, probably already helping Angharad out. It was fine. He didn't have to feel responsible for anyone.

*

Tsuyoshi dumped Neo in the hospital hallway, all wrapped up in chains like a present, just outside where the nook Dr Yeoh was having her morning cup of decaf tea. She turned and raised an eyebrow at him.

"Just for you I'll even clean his injuries," Tsuyoshi said.

"No need," Dr Yeoh said.

*

Irene Yeoh took a deep breath as she looked at Neo, who lay on a clean bed, neatly trussed up for her to deal with as she wanted. He struggled against what bound him, a pointless gesture.

"Be calm," she said. "I'm a doctor."

She pressed him flat on his back with a firm hand. Nobody else was on the second floor, just them and the all-seeing presence of the security cameras. She smiled up at the corner where one camera sat, small and easy not to notice.

"I didn't do anything," he hissed out.

"But you would have." She placed her hand on the tray of surgical implements and surveyed her options. They all looked interesting. Clean. Sharp.

"Ah, but—" She watched his panicking eyes as they rolled around, searching for a way out. "You don't really care if I do hurt her. I've met people like you. We're the same. We don't really feel things like that for strangers."

"I suppose that's possible," she said.

"She's just someone you find useful."

"I do find her very useful. It would be a shame to have train someone else up like I've trained her."

"You could find someone else!"

Irene looked down over him, at his struggles on the bed, and sighed. "Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm one of those people who doesn't feel that maternal urge when they see a young person look up to them in wonder. Maybe I feel nothing for almost anyone here. But, Neo, you stupid child, I know what you did to my son."

"That wasn't me! I didn't do it!"

"It doesn't matter to me whether you squashed his arm in the metal press or just left him there when it happened by somebody else's will. A mother's rage is not easily talked down."

"You're a doctor. You swore an oath."

His voice was shrill. She clamped a hand over his mouth so she wouldn't have to hear it anymore.

"I am a doctor, yes. I've done such amazing things. If you knew the things I've learned from medical experiments, you would cry from the glory of discovery.

"It's sad, really, to think about how you've wasted your life. You killed a few domestic animals and tortured one small child before getting yourself caught. I learned about my inability to feel deep compassion at a young age and funnelled it into a productive career. People have paid me to experiment on people who couldn't give informed consent. It's all about knowing your strengths and figuring out the most intelligent way to use them.

"Then again, maybe I do like Angharad and want to take care of her. Maybe I'm warm and giving and like a lot of people – my son, my late husband, Antoine when he cleans up after me, Captain O'Connor and Major Keating when they laugh over gossip."

It was possible people could change for the better.

She took her hand from his mouth and wiped it on her coat.

"You won't kill me," Neo said.

She smiled and picked up the scalpel. "You'd be surprised what the body can withstand. Scream all you like. Nobody will care."

*

She wiped her hands as she walked down the steps. Tsuyoshi stood at the bottom of the stairwell, his body leaned against the wall. His face was a dark cloud; the way his arms wrapped around his torso reminded her of an angry child.

"He's unconscious but alive," she said. "You didn't damage his ribs overmuch."

"I didn't ask," Tsuyoshi scoffed.

"You should go talk to that girl. You're obviously worried about her. Nobody is fooled."

"The last thing she needs is to talk to someone like me."

Irene breathed in deep and smiled a little, looking down the hallway at its endless possibility. "You know, Neo thought he was the villain of the piece, the big scary monster. He didn't realise that on that account he's completely outclassed. So are you, Tsuyoshi. You have a long way to go before you become someone to be afraid of. That won't be your path."

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