Seeing Myself In You

Chapter 1: Chapter 1


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I sit there in class, looking out the window at the heavy rain falling. The sound of the raindrops hitting the windowpane is a familiar comfort to me, it reminds me of home. I am lost in my own thoughts, wondering what the future holds for me and my studies. I know that I need to focus on the task at hand, but the rain outside is a constant distraction.

I hear my name being called out by the professor, "Ye-ye, uh--" And I quickly correct her with my name, "Ye-jun." It is a bit embarrassing, as the professor apologizes for her mistake. The professor then starts scanning the room, "Ernest? Ernest? Ah, there you are. You'll be pairing up with Ye-jun."

I see Ernest looking up, he seems to be searching for me, and I notice that he immediately looks back down at his papers, not wanting to appear as though he is staring at me. I can't help but feel a little bit self-conscious about my appearance. I know that I have an intimidating look, but I don't want that to be the first impression that people have of me.

After the professor finishes her lecture, she decides to let us sit next to our partners. I see Ernest looking over at me and before I can get up and move over to him, I notice that he is frantically moving all his stuff, trying to make space on his desk. I approach him and sit down next to him. I politely introduce myself and we start discussing the project we will be working on.

"So, it looks like I'll be helping you with the stage design for a music performance, is that right?" Ernest says with a shy smile on his face.

"Yes, that's correct," I reply, with my gaze locked on his. "I'm really excited to work with you on this project."

"Oh?" He responds, surprised.

"I've seen some of your work before and I think you're really talented," I say, remembering how the art piece I saw that was done by him made me feel some sort of connection with his artwork.

This seems to have taken him by surprise, which makes sense because he probably didn't expect me to know about his artwork.

"Where have you seen my work before? If you don't mind me asking," Ernest says quietly.

I smile and reply, "I saw your artwork at the student art exhibition last semester. I was really impressed by it, and I've been wanting to work with you ever since."

As he speaks, I can't help but notice his features. He has piercings in multiple places, including a bullring and rings in both sides of his nostrils. He also has a lot of ear piercings. He has brown eyes and skin that matches, and medium-length, black, curly hair that slightly falls in front of his eyes. He has a shy and kind of awkward personality, but as soon as he begins talking about his art, his expression softens, and he almost looks like a little boy, beaming with excitement.

Ernest and I continue talking about art and the project well into the end of class. Suddenly, Ernest grabs his phone out of his backpack and looks at it. "Oh, I need to get going!" I apologize for taking up his time, but he reassures me that it's okay and that he just has somewhere he needs to be. As he starts packing up his things, I ask him for his contact information so we can plan the project. He gives me his number and I give him mine. "Okay, well, I-I have to get going, so we'll meet up soon," he says before quickly leaving the lecture hall.

I sat in the lecture hall thinking, "What an odd kid." I mumbled under my breath. I don't understand why some people can be so quiet, especially in college. It's important to present oneself as confident, even if one doesn't feel confident. Insecurities should not be made visible to others. That's how you can get hurt.

I don't know why I am thinking about this so much. I grab my laptop and slide it into my messenger bag. I take a look outside and see that it is already dark, which means walking back to my apartment will be stressful. Hopefully, the rain has calmed down. I am walking out of class when I feel my phone vibrating, I take a look down and see that my friend Don is calling.

"Hello?"

"Dude! Why haven't you texted me back?" Don shouted into the phone.

"Bro, calm down! I was in class," I chuckled.

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"Didn't class end like hours ago?"

"You're being dramatic! What do you want?"

"What are you doing tonight?"

"Going home. Why?"

"Want to go out?"

"Not really..."

"It'll be fun!"

"How is this going to be different from any other night?"

"I don't know, maybe we'll do something new or different. Come on, it'll be a change of pace from just sitting at home," Don says.

"I don't know, I'm pretty tired," I replied.

"Come on, it'll be good for you to get out of the house. Plus, I need a wingman," Don says.

"Wingman for what?" I asked.

"I met this girl at the library earlier and I want to ask her out. I need you to come with me for moral support," Don says. I don't need to see him to know that he has a big grin on his face. I met Don after playing a gig at a local bar. He came up to me, super drunk and told me how great I was at playing the guitar, and that was enough for me. I've always found Don to be very outgoing, and even though he's on the shorter side, I have to give him credit for at least attempting to hit on any girl he's interested in.

"Alright, fine. But we're not staying out too late," I agreed.

"Thank you! I'll pick you up at 8," Don says excitedly before hanging up.

Another night of getting drunk and waking up feeling terrible. I hope this girl is worth it, Don. 

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