Self Insert as Spider-Man MCU

Chapter 55: 54 Computer Rules


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“Hello, there.” I said and the woman behind the counter looked up at me. I held up the paper and pretended to read from it. “I was sent here for secretarial or assistant assessment, viability for a data entry position, and perhaps a computer maintenance position? I can't really read that last one.”

The woman held her hand out for the paper and read it. “I wish they would tell us these things beforehand.”

“I'm sorry to be a bother, ma'am.” I said and ducked my head a little. “I was just brought in today and I just signed the standard contract. I've been sent all over this place for assessment tests to see where I would fit in best and I was told to do this during my lunch break if I could.”

The woman sighed. “Fine, come around.” She said and pushed a button and the buzzer sounded as part of the counter opened up for me.

“That's handy.” I said and entered the opening and it closed behind me.

“Sharon? Can you handle this for me?” The woman asked and waved the paper at her. “I'm meeting Craig on B4 in about five minutes.”

Sharon stood up from her desk and came over to us.

“I'll owe you a shift swap later.” The woman offered.

“Done!” Sharon said with a smile and took the paper. “You know how I love long weekends.”

The woman chuckled. “No problem. Craig's working Saturday, too.”

Sharon nodded and read what I had written out. “We can handle the first at my station. We'll have to go to the computer mainframe room for the second, and I doubt we can do the third before lunch is over.”

“I'll be glad to get the first and second ones done, honestly.” I said with a smile. “Thank you.”

“Come on.” Sharon said and led me back to her desk. “What's your average typing speed?”

“That depends.” I said and she raised her eyebrows at me. “If I'm looking at the keyboard, I can top 80 to 90 words per minute.”

“Blind-typing?” Sharon asked and had me sit down after she minimized what was on the screen.

“If I'm not looking at the keyboard, I can run anywhere from 40 to 60 words per minute, depending on the content.” I said. I did not say it was computer coding, which had a lot of finger movements and slowed me down considerably.

Sharon's eyebrows dropped back to their normal positions. “That's not very good for a main secretarial position. You'll need to practice and bring those numbers up by at least 20 for each if you're seriously going for that or an assistant position.”

“It's the holidays, so I'm free during the days. I promise to get as much practice as possible.”

Sharon smiled and started a small program that gave a short typing tutorial. “Go ahead and get started.” She said and lightly touched my shoulder. “Don't be nervous that I'm looking over your shoulder.”

“I was warned by HR to not make jokes or inappropriate comments.” I said and then whispered. “Would telling you that I consider myself in 'pretty office woman heaven' right now, count as inappropriate?”

Sharon gave me a pointed look before she smiled warmly. “Yes, it might be considered inappropriate.”

“Then it's a good thing that I didn't say it.” I smiled back and started typing as I concentrated on the screen. It was just a standard typing practice program and I went through it and ended with 88 words per minute, near the top of my estimate.

“I could tell you were pausing there. Is it the standard keyboard?” Sharon asked.

“I usually type on a laptop and I don't have to hit the keys so hard.” I lied, because I had specifically paced myself and didn't realize I would get caught. “I have an idea to fix that, though.”

“Oh?” Sharon asked and leaned down closer to hear and her hand gripped my shoulder firmly.

I did not miss the very nice shot of her cleavage that she had given me. I looked at her face and saw her knowing smile. “It's...” I dropped my voice down to barely above a breath and she had to lean in closer, which gave me an even better view of her breasts. “...a keyboard pad.”

“A what?” Sharon asked as she turned her head to face me and her lips were right there, red and plump, and I could swear she wanted to be kissed. Her wavy blonde hair also blocked us from view.

Not now, not now... oh, damn. I thought and couldn't stop myself as I looked at her mouth and licked my lips, then I looked back into her amused eyes. “It's a long rubber pad that can be rolled up when not in use. I've got the design in my head and it'll work just like a normal keyboard, only there's no keys and it's just printed on the pad.”

Sharon's mouth opened slightly in surprise and I could almost see her brain working through what that could mean for her personally and probably for the secretarial pool as a whole.

“May I?” I whispered and glanced at her lips and then back to her eyes again.

“Yes.” Sharon whispered back and I puckered my lips a little and moved that last bit of distance to kiss her as if we had been dating for a long time. She made a little surprised sound and then her tongue was almost down my throat as we made out right there.

Pepper really did give me a bit of a fetish. I thought, because I was really turned on and she seemed to have no problem making out with me, which was surprising.

After a couple of minutes, Sharon broke the kiss. “The... data entry terminals... are in the server room.” She whispered and stood. Her nipples were poking out and the bumps they showed looked very appealing.

I stood up and gave her my best smile. “Please lead the way, Mistress... I mean Miss Sharon.” I whispered and she took in a sharp breath, then she gave me a very warm smile in return.

“This way.” Sharon said and led me across the room and through a normal door into a short hallway.

I thought that was odd, considering the server room should have some security besides the multiple cameras I could detect with my spider-sense. The door at the end didn't have a handle and I wondered what she was going to do to enter.

Sharon touched the wall beside where the door handle should have been and it depressed before it opened to reveal a hand scanner. She put her hand on it and spoke. “Agent 21365.”

The door beeped and buzzed and stayed where it was. I was disappointed, because I expected a whooshing sliding thing and it was just a push and enter version.

Before I could step forward, my spider-sense tingled a little and I was shoved up against the wall.

Sharon looked a little frantic as she kissed me hard as her hand grabbed my erection through my pants. “Mmm, so delicious.” She whispered and rubbed her chest on mine as her hand rubbed me through my pants.

“Cameras.” I whispered and kept my hands flat on the wall and didn't try to grab her or kiss her back.

“Faked.” Sharon said and kissed down my chin and started nibbling on my neck.

I didn't comment that they weren't fake and just stood there as she did what she wanted. I could honestly say that she knew what she was doing, because I was getting close, and I wasn't helping her at all.

“I can feel how responsive you are.” Sharon whispered into my ear and then bit my earlobe.

“I'm going to mess up my pants in a minute.” I whispered back.

Sharon moved back slightly and looked at my face as she smirked at me. “That could be a problem.”

“Yes.” I said and she saw on my face that I didn't want to mess up my pants.

Sharon took a deep breath and let it out before she stopped moving her hand on me and stepped back. She gave my crotch a significant look and then she walked to the door without a handle and pushed it open, because it was already unlocked.

I put my hands up to my face and rubbed it for the cameras, as if in exasperation, then I followed Sharon into the server room. I refrained from telling her how easy it would be to bypass such a simple locking mechanism and entered the server room. We went over to a bank of computer terminals and there were several other people there. Two men and a woman.

“Kelly? We have a possible candidate for your department.” Sharon said. “Can you give him the basic run through?”

A very short-haired brunette stopped typing and used a marker to mark on the large printout of folded sheets where she was, then she stood and walked over to us. She looked at me from my head to my feet. “He's a little young.”

“He just signed up and is going through assessment today.” Sharon said and handed her the paper with my list on it.

“I see.” Kelly said and smiled at me. “Follow me and try to keep up with what I tell you to do.”

“I'm very good at taking directions and following orders, ma'am!” I said with enthusiasm.

Sharon made an odd sound and then gave Kelly a particular look.

“I'll bring him back out to your station when he's done.” Kelly said.

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“Thank you.” Sharon responded and gave me a hungry look before she left.

“Depending on how much you like having sex, you either lucked out by having her assigned to you or your luck sucks just as much as she does.” Kelly said to me.

I blinked at her several times before I understood. “It's an even mix of both, ma'am.”

Kelly looked surprised for a second, then she laughed. “Take my place at my terminal. It's already set into the system and you'll be entering the numbers from the printed spreadsheets in descending order.”

I walked over to her desk and sat down. “This seat is really warm.”

Kelly gave me an odd look. “I don't poach other women's prospects.”

“It's kind of funny that no one really asks me what I want to do.” I said as I turned my head and smiled at her. “Sharon doesn't even know my name. It's Ben Parker, by the way.”

Kelly's odd look changed to a genuine smile. “Are you actually going to tell her no?”

“This is my first day and I haven't even received a department assignment.” I said. “I could become someone she'll have to answer to and that's going to be really awkward, considering I had to stop her from doing more than feeling me up in the hallway.”

Kelly's eyes went down to my tent pole and back to my face. “You know I could report you for that.”

I nodded. “I was warned by HR about inappropriateness.”

Kelly nodded back as she tapped her finger on the top sheet beside the computer terminal. “Start here and enter the numbers. It automatically jumps to the next entry on the screen as long as you hit the period and enter the last two digits of the number to activate the macro.”

I looked down at the sheet and saw 56.67 was the next number. “Hold on, that's it? Just entering numbers?”

“That's the current assignment, yes.” Kelly said. “Once we have these entered, we will move on to adding any new files that need to be digitized, including written reports, photographs, witness statements, invoices, and anything else that needs to be added to the database.”

I looked at the keyboard and it was a full one with the numerical keypad on the right. I did a quick test and made sure the period actually worked. “My WPM is going to jump to a ridiculous level now.”

“What do you mean?” Kelly asked and looked curious.

“All the numbers are right here under my right hand.” I said and put a finger on the sheet to guide myself, then I trusted my spider-sense as I started typing. My right hand had to barely move as I flicked my fingers over the number keys like lightning and I made sure to apply enough pressure to make the numbers appear.

Kelly's mouth dropped open as I burned through the sheet she had gotten halfway through. I flipped it up and did the next, then the next and the next, all without looking at my hand. After a bit more than ten minutes, I had finished her stack and the two men at the other terminals were only about a quarter of the way through their stacks.

“I had the same talk from HR, or I would be cursing my head off right now and I would be begging you to join my department, with the threat of death if you didn't.” Kelly said.

I chuckled and stood up so that she could enter her finish code, or so she said, and I now had her computer access code to the database.

“How did you do it so fast? That was...” Kelly paused and looked at the stats for my data entries. “...290 words per minute!”

“When a word counts as only four digits with a period in the middle? That's almost five full entries a second. I could do that all day and not break a sweat.”

Kelly stared at me. “Are you kidding me? After the twelve minutes you just took to finish my assignment, that's almost 3,500 entries!”

I shrugged. “I slow down considerably if there are actual words and I can't look at the keyboard.”

Kelly gave me a calculated look. “You come work for me and I'll guarantee that you'll be on minimal report entries. You'll only be assigned numerical data entry tasks and it will free up my whole department to work on the things you have trouble with.”

I blinked my eyes at her in surprise, because that was a really fantastic offer. Like, really fantastic. I put a hand on her shoulder tenderly and smiled. “I really appreciate the recommendation, Kelly. I'll add it to my final interview at the end of my assessments.”

“I'll be doing better than that, Ben. I'll send it to HR myself after I bring you back out to Sharon and she can hand you over to computer maintenance for...” Kelly paused as a soft ring sound came from a speaker near the door.

The two men paused in their work as they marked their sheets like Kelly had when she had stopped.

“We're heading to the cafeteria.” One of the men said.

“I brought a lunch, so I'll meet you in the break room later.” Kelly said and both men nodded.

As soon as both men had left the room, she turned to me and gave me the best sad puppy dog eyes I had ever seen on a woman. With her short dark hair, she reminded me a little of Max when she begged me to go down on her.

“You're lucky I'm not allowed to tell you how cute you look right now.” I said and she beamed a smile at me before I walked over to the closest guy's station and did the same fast typing trick.

It only took about eight minutes for me to finish, so I went to the next guy's station while Kelly entered her security code into the other man's computer terminal to end his assignment. It took just over seven minutes for me to complete the last stack and Kelly used her code and ended the task on that terminal as well.

Kelly's terminal beeped at her and she nodded at the screen. “Barb is bringing me the next stack of reports already.” She said and sent and acknowledgement. “Ben, you don't realize how much time and work you've just saved my department.”

“It only took about half an hour for me, so I hope you have pay scaling for awesome workers.” I joked and she softly laughed before she marked my list with two check marks and handed it to me.

“Come on, I'll give you back to Sharon before she wonders where you are.” Kelly said and led me over to the door of the server room and opened it.

I followed her out and we met an older woman named Barb at the outer door. She handed a huge stack of file folders to Kelly and I couldn't stop the sad look I gave her.

“You're not abandoning me, Ben. You passed your assessment with flying colors and you don't need to stay and keep helping.” Kelly said and looked around. “Where's Sharon?”

“Gail from HR came to see her and they left about fifteen minutes ago.” Barb said.

Kelly and I exchanged knowing looks.

“I guess that means I need to head over there to meet my guide, too.” I said and Kelly nodded. “Good luck with all of that.”

“It's what I do.” Kelly said and then squinted her eyes at me. “I better see you later, Ben.”

Barb looked a little surprised at that.

I chuckled and decided to mitigate that loaded statement. “I impressed Kelly with how fast I can complete simple tasks.”

Kelly understood what I was doing and chuckled. “Almost 300 wpm for data entry is not simple!”

“You're kidding!” Barb gasped.

“I'm writing up a recommendation and a requisition form for him, because I need him in my department.” Kelly said and her voice dropped an octave. “They better accept them, or there could be... trouble.”

Barb barked a laugh. “You definitely impressed her if she's already this possessive.”

I nodded and smiled at both women. “I'll be adding my own request, so we might be seeing a lot more of each other soon.”

Barb gave me a pointed look.

“I really need to work on not saying leading or provocative things.” I said with a big grin and Barb smiled right back. “Have a great day, both of you.”

“You, too.” Barb and Kelly said and I walked over to the front counter.

“Get everything done that you needed?” The woman at the counter asked.

“Only the first two tasks.” I said and showed her the list. “I might have gotten to the maintenance test if Kelly hadn't unleashed her puppy dog eyes on me to make me stay longer. Those things should be outlawed!”

The woman laughed and hit the button to open the counter for me. “Good luck on the rest of your tests, young man.”

“Thank you.” I said sincerely and left the administration office. I had spent a bit longer there than I had intended and also gained a lot more than I thought I would. With the department head's own computer access code to the main servers, I could do a lot of things and ensured my threat to the doctor was not an empty one.

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