Chapter 16: Chapter 16

There was once someone smart, a man that used to work for the Steward of the Gondor, a scholar. His name was Fred and he was interested in alchemy although his work was to copy down information from other languages, especially elvish, into his own. He was amazed with all the information he found from elves about health, economy, war, power but he couldn't quite use them for his own. He was limited to his own species and it drove him mad. Then, one day he took initiative and during a feast for their visitor, Saruman the Wise, Fred asked him for a favour. But the wizard denied him such knowledge and so the human decided he should take matters into his own hands. Only, elf magic does not work for the wicked human soul and the results were disastrous. 

He would repress his anger every day and lash out every night, like an animal. He was forced to move as far as possible by his peers and so he was left all alone. But one night, after the earth shook under Sauron's defeat, he was surprised to have a visitor. 

"Help me. I need to hide." It was a person drenched in sweat and dirt, dressed in only a dark tunic, bare feet and an overall aspect of someone who has been abused. 

Fred let her in, but only because he noticed her ears. She was an elf. As soon as she sat down, he brought her water to drink. His hands were trembling with delight, finally meeting a woman that could help him use the elven magic to become immortal. 

But the elleth was not keen on helping anyone. She rested for a day before she decided to move forward.

"Stay. It's still dangerous outside." Fred said with eyes wide and creepy. His hands seemed to want to reach her continuously, as if he could get her soul. The elleth needed one look at him to know what he was.

"I can see into your mind, a man whose desire is eternal life. But nothing can give you what you wish because men are weak and easy to manipulate. I have seen your kind giving their souls for power." She answered, her grey eyes striking the man. He was left speechless for a moment before he screamed after her.

"How dare you! I saw your hands, you have been marked with the dark fire! You scum! You left your kin for power, just like a poor, treacherous man." 

Those were his final words as the elleth cut his neck with one sway of her sword. That came as a shock- how easy she could kill one loud mouthed human.

Those images drifted away and changed into the calming sight of water falling. Mistril couldn't help but let her past consume her. There was a cliff from which one would die instantly if he were to fall and that idea has been swirling in her mind for a while. 

"Are you alright?" Elladan asked approaching her slowly. 

Mistril hadn't said anything ever since they left, almost three days ago. She seemed to be in a constant state of sadness and self-pity, which was very unlike the elleth they had met when she arrived in Imladris with Glorfindel.

"No." She answered, not lying or hiding her true feelings. "What if I fall off that cliff? I'll probably die instantly."

Elladan's eyes narrowed at her and quickly surveyed the sight. It was better to be safe rather than sorry so he had to speak to his brother later and inform him of her thoughts.

"Don't frown. It won't matter if I die since I will be sent back. Again and again and again..." She added, turning to the dark haired elf with a forced smile. "That's my punishment after all. Do not look so worried, I'm not going to do anything that would endanger you or your brother." 

"I do hope once we arrive in Lorien you will stop thinking so lowly of yourself. I'm sure my father told you before but the past doesn't matter anymore. It's what you do from now on that makes a difference." Elladan explained, his dark long hair swinging in the air.

Mistril smiled at the wisdom of such a fragile creature. Elves born with the choice of immortality were rare and she only met them briefly before. But she was living with the wisest of them all, he returned her memories and still welcomed her into his land. He trusted her with his sons and with choosing the right path to Lothlorien. It was quite an honour and guilt was eating her soul away.

They walked for several more days when Elrohir noticed how drawn Mistril was to the water. She'd prefer to stand there rather than near the fire and she'd always touch it softly as if she was caressing the surface, before placing her feet in. 

"Running away from the source of warmth?" Elrohir asked as he sat down next to her. It was rather breezy and the river was cold, yet she seemed content.

"Fire reminds me of...Mount Doom. I used that fire in order to create the means of many deaths, most of them innocent. For you, is a source of warmth, of food and light but for me, it's all about hatred and death." She explained calmly, her eyes narrowing as she looked into the horizon.

"Now that you remember, why do you think you were found in Greenwood?" Elrohir asked genuinely curious.

"I'm sure the Elvenking is wondering the same thing." She said chuckling when she imagined his face. "I was going to Esgaroth. I had to bring a sword taken by orcs but I was also searching for something...someone."

"Who?"

"A creature created by selfishness and dark magic. A creature that should never see the light of day. But the goblins noticed me and followed me all the way from the mountain. I killed all of them but one managed to wound me. My eyes and my hands changed, I survived that battle because of this darkness inside."

"There are many ways in which you can repent. Lady Galadriel will guide you." Elrohir said, looking at her but not quite seeing much since she was staring ahead.

Elrohir didn't notice but from the moment he started the conversation, her mind opened up and her soul reached far, so far into Greenwood, and into the mind of the elf that changed her life. 

The Elvenking was enjoying silence after a busy day talking with his ministers about the upcoming winter when he suddenly got this chill up his body and he started to dream with his eyes open. He needed to lean against the wall because the force of so many memories was overwhelming. And then he started to see everything, welcoming the flood of information.

"He was right, all along." He heard her voice although she was speaking to someone else. "I'm nothing but a tool that the Enemy can use, no matter who that enemy is."

"There must be something to fight for. You have Glorfindel now and to me it seems like he already made a difference in your destiny." Elrohir added, his words sounding so much like his father.

"I'm...not so sure anymore about that," she muttered.

---

It was curious how everyone believed that her salvation was found into Glorfindel. Lying back on the grass, she placed her hands under her head and looked at the starry sky. Closing her eyes, she could still picture the moment she realized she could cling onto Glorfindel. She was young...

"Mistril! I have an errand for you!" Her father's voice rung through the walls of their home. The store was downstairs while the top levels were reserved for the family. 

"Is it for the palace?" Her voice came back instantly.

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"Yes, it is." Was his answer as a knowing smile appeared on his face. He could hear her come down the stairs, excitement and anticipation running through her veins. "Now, why is that you look so eager to do errands for the palace but bribe your sister to do the others?" 

Mistril was younger, her face held the same innocence as Legolas and her hair was long and red. She did look slightly different, brighter and the way she moved seemed to be quicker as if one could literally see life flowing through her. 

"I enjoy the courtyard of the palace. It's a beautiful place." 

"The courtyard is where lord Glorfindel likes to spend his time." Valdaglerion always suspected his daughter had a crush on the hero but he never said anything about it. 

"Do you want me to get it there in time or not?" She asked grumpily, hiding her face behind her hair. 

Gondolin was a beautiful city, always covered in flowers. The houses were all kinds of white and beige while the roof was always yellow, as if to attract the sunlight and make them seem like every house was a star shining brightly. 

Once arrived, she walked up the stairs into the palace and smiled at the elves working inside. There were many healers coming in and out and she loved how they always seemed to glow with kindness. But of course, nobody could rival Glorfindel. Once she entered the palatine courtyard, she couldn't help but feel her heart beat faster. He was standing with his back at her on a chair so she walked to him, grasping the sword in her hand tightly. 

"I'm here, lord Glorfindel. I brought you the sword." She said softly, suddenly shy in front of such a personality.

The man rose and placed his book aside before he turned to face her. Unlike what the memory was about, and she knew it definitely happened like she remembered, the person that faced her was not Glorfindel. Her whole body tensed and she lost sight of where she was. To be frank, it didn't matter because she realized once his face came into her mind that something has changed.

Mistril opened her eyes and had to cover them immediately after. It was day, she fell asleep while taking a walk through her memories. 

"Are you awake? We should go. If we maintain this pace we'll be there by the day after tomorrow." Elrohir said while packing his stuff. Elladan was still sleeping though which made his brother kick him lightly. "Time to wake up, sleeping beauty." 

"Yeah, yeah. Five more minutes." Elladan mumbled but it was clear his brother won't have it so he kicked him harder. "Stop being so violent, brother!" 

"Am I really? I want to sleep in a bed as soon as possible." 

But Mistril was still in the aftermath of her dream. The change was sudden but it made her heart still beat out of rhythm. It continued on for the rest of the trip although she did not dream anymore.

---

Entering Lothlorien was like entering Gondolin in a way: it was magical. 

Lothlorien was a place so peaceful that even stepping in the forest made Mistril feel this amazing surge of relief wash over her. It wasn't Gondolin, it wasn't home, but it was the elvish land that felt the most like home to her. As they continued their journey to the capital city, the golden leaves drew Mistril's attention and made her gasp in awe. 

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Elrohir asked noticing her sparkling eyes. It was rare to see those deep green eyes of hers so full of emotion. 

"Wait until we get to Caras Galadhon. I've been here before and it still leaves me speechless." Elladan added smiling with contempt and pride.

Mistril could hardly listen to the twins with how much beauty surrounded her. The trees were thick and lively, not quite like the ones in Greenwood, which were silent before her. These golden trees were murmuring, were so alive that she could feel them pulsating under her feet. 

And then she heard her. The Lady was watching her walk into her land, knowing who she is and who she was. The forest opened up to them and welcomed the three visitors. As soon as they got in the city, Mistril faced the most beautiful sight she had ever seen, after Gondolin of course. Two people walked to them, one elleth that looked pure in her beauty and an elf that was visibly a leader in every aspect. 

"Welcome to Lothlorien, Mistril of Gondolin." The ellon started, "I am Celeborn, the master of this land. Lady Galadriel already told us about you but fear not, there is no judgement." 

Mistril nodded in respect before she turned to the elleth. She smiled kindly and looked straight into her eyes with such knowledge that Mistril swore she saw Elrond in her eyes. 

"Arwen Undomiel is my name. I'm pleased to see my brothers have not disturbed your peace on the way here." She said a glint of bemusement in her eyes. "Please follow me. I will show you around until the lady is ready to see you."

"So, you are Elrond's daughter," Mistril begun the conversation as soon as they remained alone. Celeborn took the brothers inside as they had much to talk, probably about her too.

"And you are the light in lord Glorfindel's eyes." Arwen replied making Mistril flustered by the given title.

"I do not know why I receive these titles because really, there is nothing but disappointment and sorrow attributed to my person. I'm not sure if you know, but I am-" She was cut up immediately.

"Daewen. I know. The Shadow of Angmar stepped inside the one place where darkness cannot enter. That is enough proof that Lady Galadriel knows what's in your heart." Arwen said softly, smiling encouragingly at the newcomer as they walked up the stairs to a platform that reminded Mistril of the one in the halls of the Elvenking. It was wider and it was built into the trees, which was indeed a wonder for someone whose home was regular. 

"Guilt. I'm sure she sees it. But I've been thinking a lot about these marks. They appear harmless for now but the darkness has not vanished from Middle Earth. Once it rises again, I will become your enemy." Mistril admitted, licking her lips anxiously. She could already see the crowds turning against her as soon as those eyes will turn completely black.

Arwen smiled softly and touched Mistril's wrist gently, as if she could sense what the older elleth was imagining. The touch was so light that it felt like a leaf brushed her hand. 

"Do not be afraid. Trust who you are now. They sent you back for a reason." Arwen stated, her gaze strong and firm. She was a soft version of her father, and if Elrond could so easily see through Mistril, then Arwen could too.

"They sent me back in order to punish me." Mistril muttered with dejection.

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