Chapter 10: Chapter Ten—Nitpicking

“Dead,” my father said, dropping his suitcase. “That storm that came after you left… the Outlands are in rough shape.”

“Is she dead, or did you leave her there to die—” I tried asking as he swung to slap me. I grabbed his wrist in the air, digging my nails into his coat fabric. “Careful, I am not a child anymore. If you strike a grown man, you should be prepared for the consequences.”

He jerked his hand away, annoyed. “Your mother is the reason for this ego of yours,” he snapped as his dark blue eyes still held that jealousy. This man hated me, and he hated anything that took attention from him. “Where is the head of the school?” he demanded, surveying the large lobby that was eerily quiet; a few staff members and security strolled around.

“Why?”

Father rubbed his wrist with an irritated expression. “I need to tell them something.”

“Tell them what?” I asked, as my glare made him visibly uncomfortable. He hated it when I stared at him like that. But it wasn’t on purpose; it was just my annoyance, and it might have sometimes appeared murderous.

“You have something dangerous inside you,” he answered, stepping back as he stared at me like I was some sort of abomination. I’m surprised he didn’t try drowning me as a child. The only thing stopping him was probably my mother. She was indeed the only person who could tame his out-of-control self-worth.

I tilted my head at him. “What would that be?”

“Once again, where is the headmaster?”

I glared at him for a bit, “Edwin is out. He just dropped me off, and it’s past four in the morning. Normal people are sleeping.”

“Is he the head of the school?” my father asked with his vexed tone I didn’t miss. 

Why couldn’t he just stay and die in the Outlands? I would rather mother be here than him. “No, he is above the Grand Scholars, and you do not have the pull to see The Lord Magister of the Archon Domain.”

“That works,” he agreed, picking his suitcase back up. “Take me to your room, boy.”

I didn’t respond, but he took that as a yes as we rode the elevator to my apartment, which was damn near the top. Sure, the view was marvellous, but it took a whole ten minutes to arrive at my floor, and I wasn’t enjoying the alone time with my father.

The doors slid open, and I exited through the dark oak walled corridor. We continued down the marble floor as my father gawked around in awe. This floor was luxurious looking, so his amazement was called for, but I didn’t care for it since seeing him delighted was the last thing I wanted. Finally, we came to my door. I noticed the green light next to the keypad—my door had been unlocked. I grabbed the golden handle and opened it, flipping the lights on to find Covic, laying on my couch in his underwear, and Danelle on the floor in one of my shirts, cradling a pillow with visible drool on it.

Covic woke up with a dazed expression. “Hey mate, um, we came back to wait for you to continue the party, but you never came back, and we just got wasted without you,” he stated, sitting up. “I am still drunk, I think.”

Danelle moved to her knees. “Who’s that?” she pointed, and Covic looked over at my father, squinting.

“That’s my—father,” I said, gesturing towards him. 

Danelle catapulted herself to her feet, rushing to my bathroom as Covic put on his leather pants and tank top quickly, almost falling over a couple of times. He walked over with his belt unbuckled, putting his hand out, “I am Covic.”

“They let the students get drunk? Sin’s Paradise is not an exaggerated nickname,” my father said, grabbing Covic’s hand, and shaking it weakly. “You can refer to me as Mr. Reed,” he finished, walking around, scrutinising the disastrous state Covic and Dannelle unleashed upon my apartment. The number of cans and bottles was shocking. How could three people drink that much?

I leaned over to Covic’s ear. “Where’s May.”

“Probably naked in your bed,” he mumbled.

I let out a delayed sigh. “Why?”

“She, I quote, was going to jump you tonight,” Covic whispered, folding his arms in front of him. “I was going to save you if needed.”

I put my hand on Covic’s shoulder. “Wow, you are my friend.”

“Anytime, mate,” he grinned, “I’ll keep your chastity safe.”

“Please never say that again.”

My father threw his arms up in disbelief. “And why is your face bloody?”

“Bar fight. How are you just now noticing?”

Father said nothing after that as he stared blankly at me. I could see how this looked terrible. He clearly had never been in the academy before he met my mother. Not that my father amounted to anything before living on my island; he was simply a photographer. 

Danelle came out in her clothes from last night and walked over, motioning me to bend down. Her lips came to my ear. “You’ll change your mind,” she whispered before kissing me on the cheek, “night… morning… What is it right now?”

“Morning,” Covic said, picking his jacket up. “Later, Cyrus, don’t forget about your… room,” he said, walking out with Danelle, and I cringed at the thought of speaking to my Father.

My father kicked a few bottles on the wood floor as he surveyed around. “I expected more from this place.”

“Better than getting smacked around at home,” I responded and I saw my father’s eye twitch in annoyance.

“Oh, I am sure it is. But creators forbid you get disciplined,” my father said, tossing his bag on my brown leather couch. “I’ll wait for Edwin, but I want to see him soon.”

“Cyrus?” I heard and looked to my left at May, poking her head around my door.

My eyes rolled in anticipation of what I would have to deal with behind that door. I announced I was going to shower and made my way towards my room. May slid back inside, and I stopped, glancing around the living room.

 “You can sleep on the couch or whatever,” I said, waving my hand around with a lack of enthusiasm before entering my room.

The room was pitch-black as I fumbled over to the wall with just one massive window and opened the curtains. The glow from the ring lit the room enough to not trip over things. May quietly sat on the edge of the bed. I walked over and knelt in front of her. She just wore my covers around her body and stared at the floor.

“Are you still intoxicated?”

May glanced up. “Yeah, a little.”

“Do you want to stay here, or do you want me to take you home?”

“I want to s-stay.”

After standing up, I glared down at her. “Can you control yourself?” I asked, and she weakly nodded. “I will be back in a few minutes after taking a shower.”

It took more than a few minutes while I let the water run over my sore face. I would heal myself but needed to syphon more of May’s magica. Since the talk, she hadn’t touched me as much, and I would not ask for it. It always felt dirty taking people’s magica; it sort of felt like I was stealing at times. The lack of asking permission probably didn’t help this feeling.

The water hit the back of my head as I leaned against the tiled shower wall with my hands. My mother… of all people, I wanted her to see me become something. I tried to make her proud. She wasn’t the mother of the year, but she always made me feel appreciated, even for the most trivial things. If it wasn’t for her constant praise when Father wasn’t in the room,  my self-esteem would’ve been crushed. I had to ask him how she died. I needed to know.

The thought of her being gone hit me more than I expected it would. Going through life numb always seemed like the right idea but being emotionless was not an option at this moment. Forcing the tears back did no good, as I gave myself an hour to feel. The sobbing was for my mother, but I think that just was the crack that broke the dam. Everything lately was stressful, and I had just been shoving it farther and farther in the back of my head for relief. It pressured me to make Edwin proud, to be an idol to May and… I appeared to want Danelle and Covic’s attention—this all was a complex notion since I wanted to be alone most of the time. For the first time in my life, solitary was not what I wanted.

I got caught in a cycle of panic attacks and overflowing emotions as I sat in the foetal position under the water and steam filled the room. This was pathetic, but I needed it. I needed to get this out so I could face future problems. This was weakness leaving the body, and there was nothing wrong with this purge. If I let anyone see this stress, they would think less of me—at least that’s what I told myself.

After realising I had been in the bathroom for far too long, I got dressed in grey sweatpants and a T-shirt from underneath the sink. Usually, I’d sleep in my underwear, but I needed as many clothes on as possible with May around. I returned to May, sitting in my shirt in the middle of the bed with her knees in it. She didn’t move as I walked over and got into the bed, staring up at the ceiling; I hadn’t gotten it all out in the shower.

“May… I am going to need to be weak in front of you.”

May turned to me. “What’s wrong?”

I put my hands over my face, letting those frail emotions leak again. May reacted immediately, putting her arms over me, hugging me tightly. She just slowly rubbed my arm for a while with her head on my chest, glancing up several times with a look of pity. That was the one thing I didn’t want: pity.

“I didn’t… I didn’t think I would be this torn up about her being—” I said, swallowing my emotions before saying the word. “Dead,” I mumbled, putting my forearms over my swollen eyes. I was so tired. It wouldn’t be long before I blacked out from all the excitement I hadn’t asked for.

“Who?” May asked, rubbing my cheekbone with her thumb.

I turned my head to her. The shape of her face was only visible in the darkness. “My mother.”

There was a pause. “So that man was…” May muttered, putting her other hand up to my cheek, cupping my face. “I am sorry for your loss, my love.”

“She wasn’t an exceptional mother, but she was the only pleasant thing on that island,” I said, turning away from May, rolling to my side as I stared at the bathroom door. “I am sorry. I didn’t want to do that in front of you.”

May pulled me by my shoulder to my back again. I turned to face her as she struggled to move me to my other side. “You can be vulnerable with me, Cyrus,” she said as our noses touched. I just stared at her soothing eyes for a while. 

Why did I feel so relaxed with this woman? Yet, I can’t bring myself to be intimate with her—maybe it was time.

I ended up grabbing her hips and pulling her body to mine. This almost caused us to kiss, but May jerked her head back. 

“I love you, a lot,” I mumbled, sliding my hand under the shirt to her ass, weakly squeezing it; the lack of enthusiasm was apparent. This was so damn embarrassing, but she deserved—some affection. Probably the most unsexy time to do it, considering I was crying like a child about my dead mother a few minutes ago. “This is how you want me to touch you, right?”

May gave a suppressed laugh. “Normally, yes, but you’re about to fall asleep…”

***

My eyes fluttered open as the sunshine sneaked through the crack in the curtains. May slid the straps of her red dress over her shoulders and turned back to me. “Hey, I think it’s time to… get me out?”

I sat up in bed as my head rang horribly. Something was wrong. “I should go to Doctor Federine.”

My neck was so stiff it could barely move, and there was pressure behind my eyes. 

May stared at me concerned, “You don’t look so good. Take a second.”

After calming my brain, I got up and stumbled to the door. Sadly, I opened it to my father, sitting with his arms crossed. This, regrettably, was not a nightmare. 

“It’s noon,” he said, highly perturbed.

“Yeah, and you’re, unfortunately, still here.”

“Edwin, now,” he snapped.

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My hand fell on May’s shoulder as I glanced over at her. “Get Edwin and tell him… I need the doctor,” I pointed at my father, “he may not talk to him until I am awake.” The words barely left my mouth as my face slammed into the oak wood floor, and everything went blank.

***

As my eyes slowly opened to those white pasty walls again, the light shone down and my head no longer hurt, but the illumination was so bright that it was hard to keep my eyes open. I shielded my vision, letting out a groan. Why was I always getting hurt? At this point, it was starting to be a regular occurrence, which was an unwanted pattern.

“How did you not get knocked out by that hit?” Doctor Federine said, sliding over on a rolling stool. “You have a severe concussion. That brain of yours got bigger.”

“It did hurt,” I replied, glancing over at him, “But the hit itself didn’t seem like it caused that much damage.”

Doctor Federine picked his clipboard up. “The Cranial Tomography came back fine yesterday. I sedated you for a few days during all this.”

“Is sedation always necessary?” I questioned, touching the back of my head. The days following always made me feel strange, which meant I was unproductive, and that was not a luxury I had right now with all the shit Edwin expected from me.

Doctor Federine took a second to respond. “I don’t like people, so yes.”

“You’re a doctor, though.”

“Do I need to converse with people to be a doctor?”

“I would think so,” I replied, staring at him incredulously.

“Doctor,” a nurse behind him spoke, carrying a clipboard to her chest. Her dark violet eyes stared at me intensely, sending a chill down my spine. Her flawless sun-kissed skin and widow-peaked, pitch-black hair running down her shoulders were a heavy contrast against her white scrubs. This nurse was gorgeous in every sense. It made me wonder why she worked in a hospital and did not find some wealthy businessperson to lock up. There was no shame in the act, and she was more than capable.

Doctor Federine swivelled towards Nurse, “One second, Nova.”—returning to me—“Cyrus, You can go, but I wouldn’t go to class or exercise for a few days,” he stated, leaving the room.

The nurse stared at me until she heard yelling,  breaking her concentration. I had gotten such a strange sensation from her. It wasn’t a bad feeling but also not good. I dressed in the clothes folded at the end of the bed and sluggishly made my way out.

I stepped out into the busy hall, where mangled bodies lay on stretchers and on the floor. Some men and women wore the Archon Domain maroon and gold army uniform. Others had the black Empire and white church outfits. Doctors and nurses ran around frantically as I pushed my way to the exit. Screams filled the air as a woman with half her face blown off was rolled down the hall on a hospital bed—how she was still alive was unknown to me. I averted my eyes quickly, as it was disturbingly similar to the boat. Examining the head anatomy in person was a lot different from the books.

Becoming caught in the chaos, I ended up staring at the unavoidable, gruesome scene of blood splattered and organs hanging from body cavities. Arms and legs are shredded or gone altogether. The rusty smell of blood filled the air, making me nauseous.

A doctor came out of an elevator howling, “What the fuck happened?” He looked at the carnage rolling through the hall in disbelief.

A nurse approached him, shaking his head, “The machine guns…these weapons tear through our enchanters.”

“And everything else,” The Doctor replied, disturbed. 

I wasn’t sure what this machine gun was, but it was a weapon giving magica a run for its dominance, which was concerning.

“Cyrus,” I heard in a very soft voice. Peering down, Nova was looking up at me with her doe eyes. “Follow me,” she said, leading me to the elevator through the chaos. “Edwin is at the entrance,” Nova said, hitting the ground floor button with blood on her hands. “Goodbye, Cyrus,” she finished, stepping out of the elevator. Her violet eyes stayed focused on me until the door closed. I looked over at the blood on the control panel—all this violence, for what?

After making it to the ground floor, I made my way out of the glass hospital building that resembled the academy to find Edwin sitting in his car, which stuck out from all the others. Edwin’s car was definitely its own experimental model with it’s smaller flowing design that definitely was more aerodynamic than the box steam car layout. Knowing Edwin, he was proud of it but also, at the same time, didn’t want attention.

A massively long steam train came sliding in behind the hospital, screeching. It was probably unloading all the injured soldiers. However, it was in vain considering what I saw in the halls; they struggled with what they had. I didn’t even want to see what the military docks looked like right now.

Hyperventilating, a soldier walked out, stumbling against the wall next to the door. “I told her not to join. I told her she would die,” he yelled, but his voice cracked at almost every word, falling to his knees, sobbing. He put his head to the marble ground, mumbling to himself. I stared down at the ring on his left finger as a heaviness settled in my heart. This had to stop. They would destroy how many lives before the world learned violence is a failure at communication and not a symptom of justice?

“I am sorry for your loss,” I said as he turned his swollen eyes to me. I knew my words would give him no comfort, but I said it anyway. His face scrunched into pain, but he remained quiet. I meekly walked down the stairs to Edwin’s car.

I opened the door on the passenger’s side and got inside. Edwin and I sat in silence for a moment before Edwin pushed his round glasses up his nose. “I should’ve taken you to the hospital,” he said, gripping the steering wheel tightly, causing the leather to make a crunching noise.

“Let’s deal with my father. My head is throbbing again, but I want to get this over with,” I responded, sitting back in the seat. “You can’t predict the future, Edwin,” I finished, shutting my eyes. The light still bothered me.

Edwin opened the glove department, handing me sunglasses. I put them on, reclining the seat. We sped down the road, which took a little while with the traffic making its way to the hospital. Probably the product of the emergency room calling in more staff and loved one’s seeing the massive military vessel approaching from the sea. The large steam fortresses were hard to miss, considering the city was well above sea level.

Edwin looked at me a couple of times on the way before saying something. “What’s wrong?” he asked, glancing over at me as we sat in the stopped traffic.

“I’ve just seen so much death today. It appears like it’s the only thing I know now. And, unfortunately, it is the only thing this world knows.”

“In war, people die. It is for a worthy cause,” Edwin stated coldly, returning to the road.

“Grief does not evaporate because the world needs saving,” I replied, glancing over at him, “and don’t act like you believe for one second it’s for a worthy cause. Was devastation to my home a worthy cause? Allowing hardly any men to prepare for the hurricane? My mother would be alive if it weren’t for you people.”

Edwin went to express something, but stopped. We sat through the rest of the ride in silence. Finally, we pulled into the school’s underground parking garage, and Edwin turned off the vehicle but didn’t get out. Instead, he stared forward, blankly.

“When I was young, every day brought me happiness. Life was good. I was valedictorian. My fiancée was beautiful. I couldn’t ask for more,” Edwin said, looking down, taking his glasses off. He folded them and placed them on his lap, returning his stare forward. “Destiny is what they called it. The laws of the universe are pushing me towards what I should be and not what I want. Because that is how it works.”

“Edwin, what I said earlier—”

“My appreciation for women was simple because simple was painless, but… but for some reason, she was worth the trouble. Given how much she rejected me, maybe I was just invoking fate’s wraith,” Edwin said, giving a suppressed laugh. His face fell back to sadness. “She was given her own unit. They added another Archmage rank so she could lead without waiting. That’s how skilled she was. No one in school history graduated and went straight to Archmage. When she walked through those doors at the Academy to speak to us about joining her unit. That was it. I couldn’t stop thinking about her.”

“Wait, Gelida Winsung was your fiancée,” I said, shocked. Gelida was much older than Edwin and if she was talking on the subject of joining the infantry units, that meant he was a freshman at the academy, yet to choose his career path, which made Him… “Oh.”

“Yes, the age difference was… large. And it was extremely inappropriate. I recognise that,” Edwin nervously coughed, trying to return to what he was talking about. “So back—”

“I would say twenty years is an enormous difference.”

“Will you stop? I am being serious,” Edwin replied with annoyance, glaring at me, “She didn’t even return the feeling until I was nineteen, calm down.”

“I know chasing women twenty years older than you is serious—she was almost forty, damn Edwin,” I said, pointing my finger at him. “You like powerful women,” I grinned.

“Really, Cyrus?” Edwin stared at me, so disappointed.

I put my hand on Edwin’s shoulder. “I didn’t mean what I said. You do not need to tell me the end of this story. I know it.”

“And you are one of the few people that know the entire story,” Edwin said, sighing but with a smile. “The only people memories I can’t alter are ones with extremely high anima control near the Magister’s Or you. It is as if you nullify it.”

“You try this often?” 

“Almost every time I see you.”

I was going to let this attempted invasion into my head pass for now. “So That’s why there is no mention of your name with hers.”

Edwin sighed. “I wanted her last memory to be of her fighting The Liche King. Not the boy she had an affair with and was about to divorce her husband for.”

“That must have taken you—”

“Years and years of altering everyone’s memories, yes,” Edwin said, putting his hand to his face. “And I didn’t let it stop there. Once you taste the feeling of controlling someone’s mind, you can’t stop. Life is just easier when everyone smiles and agrees. Until the Lord Magister caught what I was doing. Which wasn’t hard, considering my name was well known for graduating at the top of my class, yet they oddly dismissed me from the military.”

“He threatened you?”

“He offered me a job,” Edwin chuckled, “I am sure saying no would have ended in threats.”

“What was the job?”

“To stay out of trouble,” Edwin grinned, “I am his advisor. Problem fixer. Aid. Whatever you fancy. I keep things moving smoothly so The Lord Magister can focus on the important things, like war. That is why I must not get too emotional over things out of my power. I know these conflicts can strip people of their loved ones, and I empathise with them more so than most.”

“Understood”—my head nodded at Edwin—“Well, problem fixer, let’s deal with my father,” I responded, trying to get his mind off what he couldn’t control. As I got out of the car with the sunglasses on—I was going to steal them. This was a style I was going to adopt.

Edwin and I walked over to the elevator, waiting for it in our cringy awkwardness—Edwin and I sure had a lot in common. The art of socialising escaped us often, and I was thinking we had the same taste in women. Gelida Winsung was known for being… aggressive, to put it mildly, and I can imagine Edwin as the submissive type with women. Female authority was an unusual attraction for me as well. Odd because usually, I couldn’t stand being told what to do.

“You hurt me earlier,” Edwin said, putting his hands in his pockets. “I am sorry to hear about your mother. But I didn’t kill her, and I am the only family you have now, so let’s not toss things of that magnitude around.”

I am taken back by Edwin's words… Edwin was my family now, and he was the only supportive person in my life. Sure, May supported me, but Edwin was constantly bending the rules and making exceptions for me. He was trying to put me in the best position possible to succeed. Everything Edwin did was to help me be better. Even if he had alternative motives, he wasn’t faking the concern he expressed for me. I had no doubt Edwin would do anything for me. He always would.

We arrived at Edwin’s office, which I had been in so many times to be yelled at. His tall wooden door sat lording over the hallway, emitting superiority. Crystal handles perched themselves towards the middle, and Edwin’s nameplate sat next to the door on a golden plaque.

Edwin’s fingers stopped on the handle. The signal was all too obvious. “What we say in this room stays here—no matter what,” Edwin said as he opened the doors to my father sitting over by his desk. I walked around, taking one of the chairs and moving it to the wall as I took a seat facing Edwin’s workstation—I would not sit next to him. I barely wanted to be in the same room as him.

Edwin went to his chair and sat down, leaning on the desk with his elbows and hands folded together. “How can I help you, Mr. Reed?”

“Maybe have Cyrus leave,” my father suggested, glancing over at me in my sunglasses as I slouched in the chair.

Edwin paused, continuing his stare. “Josiah, I’ve come to enjoy your son’s company. I think the two of us have built a relationship of trust, so removing him from the room would be uncharacteristic of me.”

“How do you know my name?” he inquired, slightly irritated.

Edwin tilted his head. “I know everything that has to do with me or my surrounding people—what is interesting is the fact your son doesn’t know your name.”

Josiah looked at me. “And you know this how?”

Edwin glanced over at me quickly before going back to Josiah. “His expression.” Edwin sat back in the chair, crossing his legs. “It’s clear why he has authority issues now.”

“Are we to talk about my parenting practices all afternoon, or would you like to discuss actual issues of importance?” Josiah replied, tsking.

Edwin waved his hand around unenthusiastically. “Go on.”

“Cyrus is the Demon Lord.”

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