Chapter 137: Chapter 136: Typical Story

I exited the Crimson King's court, finding myself in a building. A really weird building. Looking to the right, I see an endless hallway with nothing but colourful doors. Looking to the left, I see even more hallway with even more colourful doors. So many doors… I am so tempted to open them all. I wonder what I'll see?

"You'll… umm… see nothing." I look at the source of the quiet voice and found a kid. I shit you not, he looks like a kid. Short, young-looking, and someone I could punt over a mountain. "Hi there." He nervously waved at me. Maybe I won't punt him. Not because I'd feel guilty, but because there's no mountain around.

"Are you here to hand over the goods?" That was the first question that came to mind. What are the goods? No idea, but it's something the Hamblin folks loved saying. That and 'I'll kill you, you bitch,' and 'You fucked my daughter!'

"Haha… I guess?" He stretched out his right arm to the side, his hand disappearing as if entering something. After a minute or two moving his arm around, he pulled out, taking out two… uh… necklaces? "It's a lanyard. Take them."

"Okay?" I grabbed both, putting one on my neck. "Why do I need this and why are there two?"

"They're for guests. Most folks get lost here, as you can see. Very confusing…" He scratched the back of his head. "The other one… umm… Kaneyama-senpai said you'd be here with your partner?"

"Oh, good point!" Mel should be in the Shadowrealm right now! I tapped my foot, creating a portal in my shadow, which Mel rose out of. She looked around cautiously before her eyes met mine and immediately dashed towards me for a hug.

"You fucking scared me with what you said before."

"Well, you never went in-depth about death flags." I return the hug while also sneakily putting on her lanyard. For once, I'm putting something on her… hehe.

"As soon as we're in a safe place, I am teaching you so much about tropes instead of passing comments."

"Aye aye, teach!" We ended the hug.

"So…" She turned to the kid. "Why is there a shota? Is this some sort of Ise… fuck, we're in the Reincarnator's Organization's base, aren't we?"

"Umm… yeah…" He sheepishly looked down. "Kaneyama-senpai said you're more likely to ask many questions… so… umm… I was tasked to answer them. I'm also your guide."

"Sure, I'll ask questions. First off, how and why are we here?"

"Kaneyama-senpai said Madeleine-san is important, so she made us save you guys from the Abyss. We… uh… have prior experience with it."

"Okay, no more questions."

"Umm… really?"

"Madeleine has influenced me a bit. Speaking of Madeleine, we should stop her before she… she has already gone through a door, hasn't she?"

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It's me, Madeleine here. I opened the door and went through it! I have no idea what Mel and the kid are talking about, but it doesn't matter to me! I entered the first door and ended up in a… bedroom? It's a big bedroom, with a big bed, with many people in it… mostly women. Naked women.

"I don't remember calling for room service." A head pops out of the pile of women, staring right at me. "Eh, whatever. Join the pile."

"Do I have to get naked to join the pile?"
"No shit… how else do you have sex?"

"Lingerie still on, but one boob is exposed."

The man raised a single eyebrow, probably imagining what I had just said. "I could see it. Okay, you can do that."

"I've just realised something."

"What?"

"Is this one of those isekai harem scenarios Mel told me about?"

"Hell yeah!" A hand rises from under a woman, giving me a thumbs up. "Interested?"

"Umm… not really."

"So why are you even here?"

"I have a list of names, and I was told to look into their eyes."

"Oh… read it out."

"The first name is… uh… Haruto Suzuki."

"That little pussy. If only the guy was a girl, he's really pretty looking… then again… hmm…"

"Next is Erwin Kunis."

"The water cooler! Love that girl… a shame about her tastes."

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"What's wrong with her tastes?"

"Slime girls."

"I can see it."

"I think… I will not share my opinion."

"Why not?"

"You seem like the kind of woman who is capable of beating me up."

"I probably am." He seems really weak. Naked people tend to be weak since there are no hidden weapons… although I do know this one maid who could hide an entire shotgun in her vagina. Terrifying.

"Who else is on your list?"

"The last guy is Fuller Stallion."

"That's me!" The guy slowly got out of the pile, crawling over bodies to reach the edge of the bed, where he sat. "So you need to look into my eye, right? Who gave such a weird order?"

"The Crimson King!"

"Oh… her." He rolled his eyes, not hiding his contempt. "So all you need is to look in my eyes, right?"

"Yep."

"Come and get it, sugar." I'm going to ignore the last part and look in his eyes. What a boring shade of blue.

The Emperor You are The Emperor. You are the leader of leaders. Side Note: He Whose Journey Brought Authority

"Leader of leaders?"

"Yeah." He gestured towards all the women. "Noblesses, chieftains, princesses, queens, and even one Empress. There are very few female leaders I haven't touched."

"Isn't it a bad idea to take them away from their homelands?"

"Probably."

"Oh, okay."

"So you need Erwin and Haruto, right?"

"It's what's on my list."

"Erwin should be behind that door. She's always a hard worker, so she sticks around in the lobby."

"Thanks."

"No problem. Feel free to hit me up anytime. I've always wanted to fu-"

And off I went.

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Character profile: Fuller Stallion

Sacred power: The Emperor

Favourite JoJo character: Yoshikage Kira

Description: Obligated harem protagonist that needs to be shown because there's always one if Reincarnators and Transmigrators are involved. Despite his very apparent desires, Fuller is one of the less troublesome Otherworlders. In fact, he has been much more helpful compared to the average Otherworlder. Fuller founded the Gaia nation, named after the Earth God that had given him his blessing, and used it to become a safe haven for Otherworlders. In return, the safe Otherworlders were to pool together their knowledge to create a country much more advanced than others. He also personally saw to alliances being built with every other country, and although he often used seduction, it wasn't his only ace up his sleeve. Two leaders have constantly evaded him, which troubles him to no end: Mana, the System Manager, and her sister Cyst, creator of Cyst City.

Chapter namesake: Typical Story by Hobo Johnson