Chapter 73: Chapter 73: Flat Zone

So I'm in the marketplace. A marketplace… how in the world did Merida think I would find a Sacred Power holder here? That I would just bump into them randomly? Well… that is what usually happens, now that I think about it. Either that or they try to kill me. Or they're already dead and I just happened to come across their corpse. Or that they're a cat. I should return to Davidstown someday to say hi to the mayor just so I can pet the grass-growing cat. He may be evil, but he's adorable.

I travelled from stall to stall, exploring whatever there was to see. I may be looking for a Sacred Power holder, but in this place, I doubt I could find them. So I've opted to do something more interesting: browse the market. You never know what weird and interesting things you'll find here. For example, the stall I'm currently looking through sells seashells… isn't the nearest beach in Thawnerry three countries away?

"That is quite right, young lady." I turned to the source of the voice, the old man running the stall. "I'm well-travelled, and I quite enjoy beaches. Here you'll find seashells from the beginning of the coastline from Acies to its end in Waterfall and everywhere in between, like from the Secret Beach in the Walled Forest. Feel free to buy any that pique your fancy."

"You've certainly travelled around." Acies is on the northwest end of the continent, and Waterfall is at the southeast end. The Walled Forest is in the Garwet Kingdom, where we used to live, on the northeast end. He's been to three different corners of the continent. Hamblin, my hometown, is the last corner, in the southwest. "I've noticed you've been to three corners of the world. Have you been to Hamblin as well?"

"Haha… sure you jest, young lady. No one in their right mind would go to Hamblin. I have thought of doing so to truly have travelled to every corner of the world, but between the Desert of Bones and the Chaos Storm, I fear I would've died before I even saw Hamblin in the distance."

"The desert isn't that hot, and the Chaos Storm is cute, let me tell you that much."

"Hahaha! What entertaining statements, young lady. Let me tell you a marketplace secret for being such a dear and talking with this old man."

"Ooh, I love secrets."

"Do you want to know why our country is called Sacre Pla?"

"Umm… no."

"A great wizard founded a country on these lands, whose name was Sacre Pla. He did many things, like making his castle indestructible, the rivers' water immune to pollution, and trees that attacked any approaching monsters. Do you want to know what he did for our blessed marketplace?"

"Yeah, it sounds interesting."

"He made it so that if you closed your eyes and walked whilst thinking about what you wanted, a voice would come into your head and tell you your wish is granted, taking you to the stall with what you want."

"That's so convenient," I looked around to see many people walking around with their eyes open, "why does no one else do it?"

"It's a marketplace secret, of course. Don't underestimate the power of merchants, even ones as lowly as stall owners."

"Duly noted!" I saluted the old man. "Thanks for telling me. I'll be off!"

"Have a good day, young lady."

I closed my eyes, hoping to go where I wanted. I want a Sacred Power holder… or a cat… actually, no, I could really go for some flatbread!

Your wish is my command. Walk forward towards your desire.

Huh… wait, are you taking me to a Sacred Power holder?! Wait… did I just waste my… uh… wish? I opened my eyes and found myself in front of a… a bread stall… oh well. There was no one attending… no wait, never mind, they're just crouching down behind the table. Let's get their attention.

"Hello, baker stall! I wish for flatbread! As flat as can be!"

The baker stood up, looking more like a shady drug dealer you'd find in the alleys in Hamblin than a stall owner in a respectable marketplace. The unkempt hair, the half-closed eyes, the hidden knife under the jacket… why does a baker need a knife?

"To cut bread, obviously. Now, flat as can be, huh. Come behind my stall for a bit." Eh? Did I say something? Whatever, I'll follow her. I walked behind the stall into what I assumed was where she rested, a small tent that could barely fit two people. "Welcome to Lana's secret flat zone, where I flatten anything and everything. Tell me, who told you about this place?"

"Wait… did I accidentally end up in a secret service that stall owners offer again? This always happened back in Hamblin."

You are reading story Side Note at novel35.com

"Accidentally… did you really want your flatbread as flat as can be?"

"Umm… yeah?"

She took out her knife, "Guess I'll have to kill you."

"Umm… you can't kill me."

"Who says I can't?"

"Going to be honest, I could beat you in a fight."

"Pfft… you're just a maid." I suddenly equipped two daggers, then quickly thrust them towards her, one at her head and the other at her heart, stopping before they could touch her. "Okay, I was sorely mistaken… would you like some free bread?"

I stared at her eyes, trying to gauge what she was trying to do when suddenly, a familiar blue screen appeared.

Flatten You can flatten anything.  Side Note: Pettan!

Oh… a Sacred Power holder. That was easy. I put down my daggers and stood up to leave.

"Eh… you're just leaving?"

"Yeah, I'm satisfied. I'll be taking one piece of flatbread, though."

"Sure thing, boss."

"I'm not your boss."

"Got it." And back to the castle, I went.

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Character profile: Lana

Sacred power: Flatten

Dream job: Necromancer

Description: The baker stall owner who has a secret service. The following message is an advertisement for Lana's Secret Flat Zone: Hi, I'm Lana, owner of Lana's Secret Flat Zone. What do we offer? A wide variety of services. Have some rubbish you can't seem to properly dispose of anywhere because of its size? I'll flatten it. Have a neighbour whose house is the object of your ire? I'll flatten it. Have a rival in love whose breasts are bigger than yours and are stupidly seducing the dumbass you fell in love with? I'll flatten it. I'll flatten it so fucking much. FUCK YOU ABI- This advertisement has been interrupted due to technical difficulties.

Chapter namesake: Flat Zone from Super Smash Bros. Melee