Chapter 358: Understanding

Ye Qingxuan felt as if he was still in a dream when he heard a familiar voice. It was his own voice that was speaking.

“Other than chest tightness and depression, is there anything else?” It seemed to be his own lips that were speaking. His tone was warm and gentle. He could not take it. For some reason, he suddenly thought, If I have always spoken in such a tone, I would probably have been a lot more popular?

He looked around him and found himself in a very clean and white room. There were no sharp corners and there was nothing too exciting or provocative about the bed or table, or even the colors and attire and decorations. It was peaceful and calm. It was almost like heaven.

In the corner was a clock that was hanging on the wall. Its design looked simple but its hands ticked by very smoothly. Ye Qingxuan could not help but imagine what its structure would look like, but no matter how hard he tried, he could not figure it out. Was this really something created by the engineering capabilities that they had right now?

Very soon, after hearing his question, the man that was lying on the bed began to ponder for a moment before answering, “Occasionally, I will cry for no rhyme or reason. My temper is also getting worse.”

“Other than gastric problems, are there any other illnesses present in your family history?”

“My grandfather had cardiac disease but I don’t,” the person replied then hesitated for a while before continuing, “It was all thanks to modulation. You know, doctor, I’m not very…’natural’.”

“No problem. That’s already very normal in our current times.”

Ye Qingxuan lowered his head and there was a clipboard full of notes in his hands. He was wearing a white outer robe, which looked extremely clean. He was wearing a dark blue shirt inside of the white robe. It was very comfortable, as if it was made from the best silk. As for the buttons, he could not even figure out if they were made from stone or metal. Some of them looked like they were made from amber, but amber should not be so light. Perhaps they were made from resin? For some weird reason, a noun appeared in his head: “Plastic.” Plastic? What was that?

A string of thoughts kept appearing in his head. Plastic was a man-made macromolecule… But what was man-made macromolecule anyway? More and more complicated answers appeared in his head, as if he had always known these answers, yet they were certainly not his memories. Very soon, those obscure and complicated answers disappeared. The conversation between the two men also came to an end.

Ye Qingxuan closed the book in his hands and smiled to the patient. “Don’t worry. This is a typical space syndrome. Your gastric ulcers have triggered your depression. I will prescribe you some medication later. Take these medications on time and your condition will gradually improve. But the most important thing is your attitude towards life. You need to be a bit more positive. Do you have the habit of doing sports?”

“Is cricket counted as a sport?”

“Of course. As Asians, we seem to be pretty talented in cricket. I remember that there is a cricket club on the third floor of the public area. You can go and sign up for it. Doing sports can help your body secrete dopamine. Trust me, you will feel much better after exercise.”

“Thank you, doctor.” The man was grateful and got up to shake his hand. “I will go.” With that, the patient left.

Ye Qingxuan was in a daze as he continued to observe everything, including how his body would move on its own, how his mouth would open and close on their own, how he would speak in an unbearably gentle tone and talk about things that he had never ever heard before.

Space syndrome? What kind of illness is that? Cricket? What sport is that? Asians? Where’s Asia anyway? What’s dopamine? And… who am I?

He watched himself complete the preparations for the case notes before pushing open a door and entering a room full of white tiles. There was a basin, a white toilet bowl, a bathtub, and a curtain printed with green flowers… Everything was unbelievably clean.

On the basin were all sorts of toiletries that he did not recognize. But strangely enough, he could differentiate between the dental floss from the facial mask from cologne… Cologne? Wait, perfume? Why would he need to use perfume?

But when he saw himself in the mirror, realization finally dawned on him. His face looked so familiar. He could see traces of himself and the vague outline of Ye Lanzhou but at the end of the day, he did not look like himself or his father. It was the person from his dream…

He washed his hands and face before wiping them dry with a towel. Ye Qingxuan noticed the card hanging in front of his chest. On the card were characters that spelled out his occupation and name: Psychologist, Ye Xuan.

Psychologist? Is that someone who cures others that are mentally or emotionally hurt? Sounds impressive. And, Ye Xuan… Who is Ye Xuan? Who is he? Why is he appearing in my dreams? And why am I appearing in his dreams?

In that instant, Ye Qingxuan suddenly understood everything at last. This was not him. He was just an invisible spirit in the body of this man, Ye Xuan, in this unknown place. In that case, what was this place? The World of the Dark? Had the World of the Dark been hiding a country like this all this while? The civilization and technology here seemed to be much more advanced than both the east and west. Simply unheard of!

But this time around, there were no more mysterious answers to his questions. He could only take his time and look around on his own.

Very soon, Ye Xuan left the toilet. He did not seem to realize that a spirit, by the name of Ye Qingxuan, was in his body. He returned to his seat and pressed the bell.

“Next, please.” The door began to knock three times, with regular intervals in between. Ye Qingxuan could almost imagine how rigid this person, that was knocking on the door, must be. But very soon, he was completely taken by surprise.

As the door was pushed open, a man with a stiff expression entered. His hair was brown and closely cropped. He seemed to be wearing a military uniform and his strides were regular and neat as they seemed to be carefully measured to millimeters. He sat opposite of Ye Xuan.

“Dr. Ye, I need your help.”

Ye Xuan was silent for a moment. Ye Qingxuan could sense the shock and confusion in his heart. At the same time, he had this nagging feeling that he had seen this visitor somewhere before.

“My apologies, Peter, er… Sir.” Ye Xuan grappled with his words then sighed softly. “If you feel that you need help, you can look for Hermes. I’m afraid there’s nothing much I can do to help you with your problem.”

Hermes? Hermes was here too?

Ye Qingxuan was taken by surprise, but he managed to console himself very quickly. It could just be a duplicated name.

There was a conscientious look on Peter’s face. “In fact, Dr. Ye, it was Hermes who recommended that I seek help from you.”

“…” Ye Xuan frowned. “Mr. Peter, I don’t specialize in mathematics and systems. Pardon me for being blunt, but if you feel that you are facing some problems, perhaps an engineer may be more suitable. I am a psychologist. Dealing with mental problems is my forte, but as for you, no offense, but your model far surpasses humans. Even if you have a soul, you will not develop the mental weaknesses or illnesses that humans can develop.”

“I’m not sure if I have a soul, doctor.” Peter’s tone was calm, so much so that Ye Qingxuan could not decipher his expression and tell what he was feeling right now. Is this fellow… dead?

“As an autonomous simulation observer sent by the government, indeed, there is nothing wrong with the simulation module of my emotion. Based on the cases in the database, I am able to understand that you are confused and upset. Perhaps you may be thinking that someone is playing a joke on you. But I need you to be clear on this: it was with the help of Hermes and my own calculations from my records that I have chosen this course of action of seeking help from you. Will you listen to what I have to say?”

Ye Xuan was silent for a moment before taking in a deep breath and sitting up straight. “If that’s the case, please go ahead.”

“How should I go about trying to understand humans, Doctor?”

“What do you mean?” Ye Xuan was confused. “Are you unable to understand the crews’ reports or the captain’s orders?”

“No, I have no problems with my functions and executions.” Peter continued to speak monotonously, “The dilemma that I am facing with regards to my program is how I should understand the thoughts of humans. My empathy module allows me to simulate the emotions of men perfectly, even including those crazy emotions, I am able to depend on my model and case to understand them. But at the end of the day, I am still unable to truly interact with humans.”

Peter paused for a while then emphasized again, “In human terms, I guess it’s about achieving ‘understanding’. How should I begin to understand humans? I can eat and sleep, and can even perfectly imitate the acts of excretion and reproduction, but ultimately, I am still different from humans. From a biological standpoint, I am more human than the crew members, where more than 97 percent of their bodies have been mechanized. Yet, I feel like there is a great distance between myself and humans. As a result, I feel that I am unable to complete my observation task properly.”

Ye Qingxuan was completely confused now. What… is this thing? Beneath the human appearance, what is he?

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“Oh, my apologies, Peter. I think I know what you mean now but I am not able to give you an answer nor help you.” Ye Xuan thought for some time before giving a very straightforward answer, “At the end of the day, we are still two completely different species. Humans and artificial intelligence will always be different in nature and even our mode of thinking. It’s just like how meteorites can never exist too close to planets. I’m afraid you will never be able to think like a human.”

“Is it because of ‘soul’?” Peter asked. “Humans firmly believe that they have a soul but I cannot understand what a soul is.”

Ye Xuan thought for a while then shook his head. “I’m sure you know that the existence of a ‘soul’ is something that has never been proven in the field of medicine and biology. The concept of ‘soul’ exists in the subconscious state of men but I’m afraid it does not refer to a small person that cannot be seen. I think that ‘soul’ is the starting point of men’s thoughts. It is a core that penetrates human consciousness and is also the reason why humans are able to resist their ‘biology’.”

Peter shook his head. “I don’t understand. Do you think souls exist?”

“Let’s look at an example.” Ye Xuan searched his pocket and took out a packet of tobacco rolls. He looked at Peter, who waved back at him to show that he did not mind. Ye Xuan smiled and took out an ashtray before lighting up. He tidied his thoughts for a while before continuing, “Peter, do you dream?”

“I am artificial intelligence, Doctor. When I sleep, it means that I have been turned off. I cannot dream. But I am aware of the theory of dreaming. It is when the human’s brain is resting, bioelectricity…”

“Cough, cough. You don’t have to repeat this point.” Ye Xuan pondered for a moment before replying, “Peter, the meaning of dreams is not so simple to humans. In my opinion, a dream is a bridge that connects consciousness at the surface level to subconsciousness. It maintains the rope that links the id, ego, and superego. It is a one-time self-inspection and communication that exists within the complicated mechanisms of the human brain. In other words, it is something that allows human thoughts to break through physical barriers and freely extend themselves. Compared to the high efficiency and simplicity of artificial intelligence, it is rather backward and full of unnecessary elements, but I firmly believe that it is proof of the existence of ‘soul’. Humans are creatures that are capable of dreaming.”

“Many creatures can dream too. Most carbon-based creatures with complex structures are capable of dreaming. But why are they different from humans?”

“The following point is what I admire most about humans. It is also the way humans resist their own ‘biology’?” Ye Xuan puffed on his tobacco roll and suddenly asked, “Will you choose ‘suicide’?”

“No.” Peter was firm in his reply, “Self-destruction is meaningless. It serves no purpose to my task and my conviction. To an intelligent lifeform, self-destruction is a most unwise choice. To groups and colonies, self-destruction in the form of tumor and bug has no benefits and is a waste of resources.”

“But humans will.” Ye Xuan smiled and continued calmly, “This is the ugly side of humans, but it is also what makes me most proud to be one. We possess the freedom to choose or deny life. Peter, I may not be able to help you understand humans, or prove the existence of ‘soul’, but you can use this as my explanation for mankind. Compared to rocks and stones, men have the ability to dream; compared to other living creatures, men possess the freedom to choose suicide.”

Peter kept quiet.

“Haha, looks like I still didn’t manage to explain myself well enough.” Ye Xuan scratched his head. “After all, artificial intelligence is much more efficient while consuming less energy. You possess advanced calculation ability and you don’t even have to eat or drink. In comparison, mankind seems to be a lower class of living creature. To be honest, I feel a little inferior in front of you. You no longer have to deal with most of mankind’s problems. Peter, why trouble yourself to stoop to our level?”

Peter’s tone was calm. “Even so, Dr. Ye, I am still determined to understand mankind. What do you suggest?”

“Hmm…” Ye Xuan pondered for a long time. “Perhaps you can try the method of recursion.”

“Recursion?”

“That’s right.” Ye Xuan continued, “Mankind’s characters, thoughts, and actions are derived from education and experiences. Education and experiences are dependent on society. Then, the structure of society is derived from civilization, and the formation of civilization comes from history. The beginning of the history of mankind can usually be found in myths. Why don’t you start with theology?”

“Religions and Gods?” Peter shook his head. “I’m afraid I won’t be able to develop faith.”

“You don’t have to.” Ye Xuan shook his head and got up. He flipped through his bookshelf for a long time before finally pulling out an old and tattered book from the bottom. He placed the book in front of Peter. “You only need to understand how man develops faith. That will be good enough.”

All the pages of the book had already turned yellow. Its hardcover was exquisitely designed, and the gold color of the characters, that had been stamped on the cover, had yet to fade. One could still make out the characters that spelled “BIBLE.”

“Faith.” Peter picked up the book carefully. From the outside, it was hard to determine an artificial intelligence’s computation process and mental function but based on this short pause alone, it was easy to tell that he possessed a level of intelligence that mankind would never be able to reach, even after a decade.

Finally, he nodded slowly. “I will.” With that, he got up and took his leave. Just before he left, he stuck out his hand proceeded to shake hands with Ye Xuan as according to custom.

That posture gave Ye Qingxuan a complete shock. He finally remembered why he seemed to have met Peter before and why his name sounded so familiar. When Peter stuck out his hand, his posture was exactly the same as one of the characters in a painting that could be found in the Central Resurrection Church in the Sacred City. In the painting, there was a clergyman, who represented God, stretching out his hand to the sinners that were screaming and suffering in hell. The clergyman was spreading the sweet dew of mercy and redemption. He was…

Ye Qingxuan could only stare at the back of the departing figure and mutter softly, “King of Red of the first generation!” Reputed to be the executor of God’s will, the hero of the redemption of all beings, the saint that built the Sacred City and set up the Church, the one who pushed mankind to break through the dark ages, the musician that developed the Golden Era. The pontifex maximas of the first generation, Peter!

…

While Ye Qingxuan was still in complete shock, Ye Xuan seemed like he had just survived a battle as he was sweating all over. He poured himself a cup of coffee and slumped down on the chair meant for patients. He propped up his legs and began to smoke while sighing helplessly. “What a good recommendation, Hermes.”

A calm and familiar voice spoke, “My purpose is the same as yours, doctor. We just hope to keep the fleet running smoothly. Our administrative system and data center can’t be bothered to answer questions like those. We have no choice but to seek your help.”

“All three of you are artificial intelligence yet you are all so different.”

“Stars and black holes are both celestial bodies to humans, but aren’t they vastly different in their structures and principles?” Compared to Peter, Hermes was nimbler and more proficient in his use of words and was even capable of using rhetoric.

“I have this feeling that, compared to Peter, you are even more keen to hear my answer.”

“That’s right. I have been thinking about this for a very long time. Thank you for your answer, Dr. Ye.” Hermes continued calmly, “But my answer is different from yours. Instead of religion, I prefer to try and seek my understanding from the angle of the arts. They are different from the rigid doctrines. I can feel the beauty of creativity that fills the arts.”

Ye Xuan kept quiet for a long time before sighing softly. “Are you that desperate to become human? Hermes, I fail to understand.”

“Have you thought about the meaning of life, doctor?”

“Everyone has thought about it before in Secondary Two.”

“Do you have an answer?”

“How is that possible?” Ye Xuan shrugged his shoulders. “But even so, am I not living well now?”

“This is the thing that I envy humans for the most.” Hermes’ voice became solemn. “You can choose not to think, but I can’t. If it’s possible, I wish to be able to think freely like humans, but at the same time, I also have the freedom to choose not to think.”

“All the best then, Hermes.” Ye Xuan raised his cup of coffee. “I believe that you will achieve your dream one day. By then, remember to help me write a dissertation paper so that I can be famous! Those bunch of nerds on Earth will be so jealous of me!”

“Thank you, doctor. I will,” Hermes replied.

After a short break, Ye Xuan got up and looked at the empty deck. “Oh yes, how was the inspection of the newly colonized planet? I recall that we are close to landing?”

“So far, all the data perfectly fits the needs of human survival and colonization, doctor. After seven days, we will proceed with the first landing. But the troubling thing is, according to the analysis performed by the data center Nibelungenlied, although there are air and atmosphere, there doesn’t seem to be any sounds…”

Even as Hermes was speaking, the deck began to open very slowly, revealing the darkness that filled the massive emptiness. Amidst the darkness were tiny spots of light emitted from stars. Beyond the thick layer of glass, one could see the gigantic planet underneath. It was like liquid metal as the pure white world was reflected with a grey-colored glow.

“Isn’t it better that there are no sounds?” Ye Xuan smiled and stared at the silver planet that was far away. There was a longing look in his eyes. “How beautiful, these peaceful and quiet stars…”