I thought I was born with a good life, but there was nothing that interested me.
Growing up as an illegitimate child of the Count’s family in a remote part of the mansion, it was not pleasant to see my mother being scorned by the children of the main wife and being pushed around by a man who could not be called a husband.
Even so, I suppose I was fortunate to have been blessed financially enough to lead an unencumbered life.
My behavior was controlled and restricted, though not as much as my half-brother’s. The only time I was free was while reading a book. Thanks to that, I’d read all the books in the mansion. Still, there was nothing of interest. I kept reading just to escape from the hand that was controlling me for a moment.
As the years went by, there was a gap between me and my half-brothers and sisters; my grades, my looks. The main wife and her sons were not amused by this and attacked me occasionally with nonsense. When I didn’t respond to them, it escalated. It would have been better if I had responded appropriately at some point, but even that seemed like a waste of time and I let go, which turned out to be a bad idea.
There were just over six months left until school graduation. Would I continue to join some laboratory or move on to prepare for entering the House of Lords? I didn’t have a single interest in my future, and just consumed my days, hoping for the best.
I was still feuding with my half-brother, but I hadn’t expected him to attack so overtly. The direct reason was, ah, I messed with the older fool’s fiancée. How disgusting. I was not inconvenienced enough to take someone else’s. It was the other side that forced me to come. It was just too much trouble to say no, but they didn’t care about that.
“Oh, here he is. Not a bad day to be playing hide and seek, is it?”
In a corner of a deserted back street in the capital, I was looking for an opportunity to escape while shielding my side from the stab of a hired thug, when a stranger called out to me indulgently. He was slender and tall, not badly dressed, but his face was unrecognizable due to the deep hat he wore.
The weather was certainly not conducive to outdoor activities, with a light drizzle mixed with sleet, but it was hard to gauge the true intentions of this elderly man who seemed to have a reason to talk to me like that. The wound was not that deep, but it would be troubling to see it bleed more than expected.
“……If you don’t want to get involved, go away.”
“Hmm? I’m a doctor, even though I don’t look like one. It’s not in my nature to overlook an injured person.”
“Ah, hey, you… Hgh, guh.”
Despite his leisurely tone, I was pinned down to the ground with a brilliant touch, and healing magic was poured into my wounds without question. I was in extreme pain and felt faint in the head as the maximum amount of magic that could be absorbed was poured into my body with no consideration.
“Well, my treatment is quite expensive. From the looks of it, you don’t have any money on you, so I’ll let you pay me with your body.”
My consciousness plunged into darkness as I thought, quite calmly, that this guy was also a pawn of that guy.
I woke up on a cot. The window was on one side, and there were multiple people behind the curtains that hung around the three remaining beds. My head was heavy and hazy, but gradually I could hear what was being said.
“…Ou… And here’s the pain again… huh.”
“Ah… It’s the season. There are a lot of them, especially on rainy days.”
“……I know! It hurts so badly, I can’t bear it.”
It seemed to be some kind of clinic. The older woman’s voice complained endlessly about the pain in her knee, while the soothing voice of the calmer man continued. After that, there was a constant stream of patients with abdominal pains, sprains, and children with fevers, so it was quite busy. The voice of the man who seemed to be a doctor reassured everyone, and they left.
I listened to the changing voices as if they were a lullaby.
“Oh, how are you feeling? I think your head is clearing.”
Before I knew it, the patient seemed to have disappeared. It was raining outside, and the time was vague, but judging from the darkness, it was probably well past dusk. I couldn’t make out the man’s expression due to the backlighting from the examination room.
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“Oh, you don’t have to get up. I’ve closed the wound, but it’s not healed yet. You’re young, and if you stay like that until morning, well, you’ll be able to move. Now, you need to sleep. Then, we’ll talk.”
He patted my head as if I was a child and left……It’d been years since I’d had my head touched.
Is he a friend or a foe? I closed my eyes again, my head was skeptical, but my heart was relieved. My eyes vaguely watched the man behind the swaying curtain.
The man introduced himself as Daniel Reynolds. He said he was a doctor who ran a clinic here in Meissery, a short distance from the royal capital… I knew that name.
“Reynor, the chief physician of the royal court…”
“I think I’ll be happy if you call me Dr. Daniel now. I have long since retired.”
He told me to cover it, but I was only surprised to see a highly respected doctor who was probably no stranger to the nobility. I see. I didn’t think there was anyone else who could immediately activate healing magic after judging my tolerance level just by looking at me. I was sure it was him.
He said he had gone to return a book to the library in the royal capital. He said he had a favorite bookstore in that area and was going to stop by on his way home when he found me lurking in an alleyway. He told me plainly that he’d always been good at finding kids who were hiding.
As if I had forgotten my usual caution, I told him everything about myself and my background, not because I heard his name, but because I was carried away by his atmosphere.
It was not sweet, but all-embracing, an atmosphere that could never be rejected or denied.
“Inclusion” … Maybe that was what this was called.
“I see… I’ve heard some things about the Disraeli family. So you’re the son of the good man. So, Mark. What do you want to do?”
“What do you mean?”
“Are you going to kick your brothers to the curb and take over, or are you going to find another way? Do you want to get even for getting stabbed? Or do you want to just walk away?
… I hadn’t thought of them. It was annoying to be done, but that was it. As I went about my day, I didn’t feel any emotion. I was alive because I couldn’t die. I didn’t want to die willingly, but I also didn’t want to live and do anything.
Dr. Daniel smiled and poured me another cup of hot tea.
“You’ll need time. I’ve taken care of the wound, and it will heal quickly, but you should stay here for a while. I’m sure you’ll see some things as you go along.”
“… Can you let me stay here?”
“You’ll have to work to pay for the treatment.”
He said that so lightly. I knew that I could not pay for his medical treatment anytime soon.
“I’m assuming you have enough credits to graduate from the school? I know some of the professors there, and I’ll talk to them. Let’s heal the wound first. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but the weapon was even carefully coated with poison. You’re lucky you didn’t die instantly.”
“He wanted me gone so badly, didn’t he? Well, it seems to have been for nothing.”
“No, I don’t think that’s the part where you should get mad…”
He introduced me to the patients visiting the clinic as an intern assistant. Life in the moderately sized country town was peaceful itself.
During office hours, I stood by Dr. Daniel’s side, followed his instructions, helped him with the details, and at night I borrowed his books to read. It was interesting to learn about medicine. It was the first time I had studied something and found it interesting, which surprised me.
Few people were injured, probably because most of the residents had a calm temperament. Why was he only dealing with patients who were under his skills as the first physician of the royal court?
He could make as much money as he wanted by staying in royal capital and treating the nobility, but why was he here for an almost free consultation?
Why did he pick me up in the first place? Even if he was right and couldn’t overlook the injured, why would he keep me here when he would just send me home and be done with my treatment…? There was so much about Dr. Daniel that I didn’t understand.
“My, Daniel, it’s been so long. Ah, so that’s the new assistant.”
‘It’s nice to meet you’, said an elegant woman of the same age as Dr. Daniel, smiling softly. I was taken to a nobleman’s mansion on the outskirts of the village, backed by a forest, to make a house call. Buddy, the big dog, and this former Countess Adelaide Dustin lived here, one person and one dog.
“Addy, how are you? He’s Mark Disraeli. I picked him up in royal capital.”
The afternoon tea was naturally prepared while they laughed peacefully at the fact that something good had fallen… I thought we were here for a house call.
On the table in front of us were two kinds of baked sweets and cups of fragrant tea, both of which were probably made by the madam. The boss was completely at ease, and I understood that this was a regular occurrence.
I saw nothing modern about the way she dressed or lived. If you called her outdated, you were right, but she seemed appropriate for this place where time seemed to have stopped.
Apparently, these two old friends met occasionally for a cup of tea and called it a house call. The time passed peacefully, and we left the house, making no plans for the next appointment.
We walked back to the clinic in a blazing sunset.
“… The only reason you’re in this village, Doctor, is because she’s here.”
“That is so. She’s very important to me.”
When I was a little surprised to see Dr. Daniel asserting himself without hiding, he paused and looked straight at me.
“Mark. Status and money are meaningless if you don’t have them when you need them. I couldn’t help her. That fact will never go away.”
I wondered what he was going to blurt out. After a moment’s delay, I realized that this was a topic that he had talked about once before and had never come up again.
“If you can reach out your hand, you should. One day, it will help you. It’ll come in handy when you have something to protect.”
“… I have nothing to protect.”
“Protecting women and children is the true meaning of a man’s life, I believe.”
His tone was joking, but his expression was bitter.
“In the meantime, you should start by accepting the favors you are given. I will not ask you to suddenly fall in love with someone. You don’t have to reply, just receive the words and feelings first. Then you’ll start to remember that you’re human…. You know, you’re just one person, Mark.”
Because I didn’t treat myself as a person, they would do the same to me. That was why it was so easy to kill me. Of course, the fault laid entirely with the other side.
The words, tinted by the setting sun, pierced the back of my mind and would not leave.
In the end, I spent about four months in Meissery. After returning to royal capital and graduating from the academy, I spent some time learning the basics at the academy’s medical department while staying at the Royal Academy of Medicine under the arrangement of Dr. Daniel.
My entry into the medical clinic suspended the succession struggle, and with Daniel Reynolds behind me, the outward attacks on me were muted.
When I had gained most of the knowledge and skills, and had made some acquaintances, if not friends, I returned to Meissery.
“… I didn’t call you.”
“I’d like to be your apprentice.”
‘You are still a funny kid, you know that?’ Having said that, this mentor with deep pockets accepted me again. I wanted to live beside this person more than my birth parents.
“Don’t worry; I’ll take care of you in the end.”
“I’ve become an old geezer to miss that kind of talk, haven’t I?”
Before I knew it, I was smiling, looked back into the eyes that were watching me happily, and I thanked him profusely.
Before the clinic started, I went to the forest to gather some medicinal herbs that might run out. Healing magic was effective for external wounds, but not for internal diseases, so medication was required. This forest, protected by the Count Dustin’s family, was home to many kinds of medicinal herbs, which the doctor and I had permission to collect.
I found what I was looking for, and as I approached the path that led to the backyard of Lady Adelaide’s mansion, I heard the light, joyful squeal of a friend.
When I looked over, I saw Margaret spinning around, twirling the basket in her hands as if she were dancing. Black hair fluttering near her shoulders, the hem of her skirt spreading gently…. The sun was shining softly around her as if it was only there, and the waltz that was supposed to be inaudible could be heard on the wind.
As I stopped to stare, she suddenly crouched down and clasped her ankles. That was probably true, she was not healed yet. If it weren’t for the doctor’s treatment, she would still be in bed.
I couldn’t help but chuckle, for some reason I felt warmth in my chest. Just as I was about to go help her, she stood up and walked slowly with Buddy as if nothing had happened.
I watched her go back to the villa and went back home.
I found myself always looking for her.
When I met my teacher, I became a “human”. And now, I couldn’t hold on to my newfound emotions.
She had a straightforward gaze, a smile with no hidden agenda. The carefree look she had on her face when she was with Lady Adelaide or my teacher. White fingertips touching the palms of conversing hands… everything that was far away from me.
I held them in my hands and didn’t want to let them go.
I knew the name that will be attached to this feeling. But I didn’t want to use such trite words to describe this urge I felt for the first time in my life.
Margaret dismissed as unnecessary many of the privileges she should have received as the Spirit Orison. It seemed that what she sought was not the ostentatious adoration of many people, but only the affection and gratitude of those closest to her.
I wondered what the world looked like in her two-colored eyes, which always wore an air of serenity. I wondered how different the world she saw from my own.
It would be full of light, and I hoped one day to know it.