Chapter 3: Chapter 2: To spend or not to spend

“To be, or not to be? That is the question—Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, And, by opposing, end them?”

Hamlet, Shakespeare

That is the question indeed.

I mean is it better to try and build a stronger foundation before birth, becoming a super baby? Or is it safer to stay as I am and grow naturally? Maybe here all babies are born super.

Is it better to keep it simple and not stand out or should I stand up and face the world as strong as I can be? Yet if I don't do something in here surely I will go mad. I need something to focus on, to hold to. For how ever long this may take.

But by standing out at birth might I not end up getting hammered down? 

'出る釘は打たれる.' Deru kui wa utareru comes to mind. 'A nail that stands out will be hammered down.'

To die once more, perchance to sleep again, and still yet may be reborn once more.

But what to spend these points on.

I don’t think spending them on strength would be a good idea because I could hurt my mother simply by moving .

Dexterity has no use to me here because I can’t move anywhere and I don’t know what it’s going to be like when I’m born. Though when I’m born is it going to be dangerous? Hopefully not.

Everything seems to be okay here but I’ve got another 3 to 9 months, an appallingly vague assumption, waiting here and there’s not a lot I can do.

Magic? Again don’t want to cause any problems and who knows what fire, ice, air, earth or simply some form of magical energy might do to me in here, let alone my mother.

Clarity, mind and senses seem like the only stats that I can really change without leading to some form of disaster. But again there is no guarantee . . . . I simply do not know enough . . .  so my conscience . . . or simple overthinking makes a coward of me . . . and I lose the will to act.

Maybe I will be able to take the risk at a later date, but for now, for when it all seems so novel and new, and completely bewildering, I will wait to make a decision. Lest I become more than discombobulated in mind but in body as well.

The paradox being that by not choosing I'm still making a choice.

My choice is I’ve decided I’m not going to spend any of these points.

Ultimately being informed is more important than being totally ignorant.

I just don’t know what I’m doing or what I’m going to need.

Besides, I don’t want to cause problems whilst I’m here in a womb.

In any case, my stats seem to be improving naturally as I am growing here anyway so maybe saving them for when I stop growing or an emergency is the best choice I can make.

I choose to save rather than spend.

Having got my time sense skill, it seems to have added itself to my stats list and I don’t need to count every second for it to continue to add my age although not too accurately yet.

But I found out that by counting for another 2 hours I can continue to level up my time sense ability. My skill is still at level two so not quite enough experience to move my overall level up to level two.

My main problem is that I am still falling asleep far too quickly and way before I can count up to 14,400 at the moment. 4 hours of concentration seems to be a little too much for my baby brain. I will have to wait for my stamina to improve.

Right, so other than counting and keeping track of time.

My next question is what else can I do for an hour at a time.

The only thing I can think of and something I never had enough time for in my first life is meditation.

Breathe in, then breathe out.

That doesn’t work out too well for me at the moment. Meditation seems to be a lot harder to do if you are focusing on your breathing when you’re not actually breathing. I literally cannot breathe being surrounded by amniotic fluid and without air in my lungs.

Try it out sometime, breathe out until there is no air left, because that’s how it feels at the moment. Somehow for me it still feels comfortable to be under that pressure but it makes it challenging to focus on an in and out motion without breathing in and breathing out.

Without that to focus on what is next easiest to focus on, keeping track of time and I’ve done that.

Let's try meditation again.. can I get rid of all my thoughts and just feel…

. . .

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Managed it for a second but there is just so much noise bubbling all around me.

and

. . .

Well

. . .

It's a little boring!

Still I’m going to keep trying. It took me several tries to get the time sense skill so it will take sometime to get the meditation. What it doesn’t take much for is for me to fall asleep.

Or daydream.

As I lie here with my eyes closed counting I keep wondering what else I can do? How can I get another skill or gain more experience. The only other thing I can do is listen to my mother’s heart beat.

Right, that’s it!

By the time I’m born I am going to be a super counter and a super listener. Can I do both at the same time. Just listen to my mother’s heart beat and count it.

Lub dub, lub dub,

1, 2, 3, 4

Lub dub lub dub

5, 6, 7, 8 . . . . . . .

Lub dub lub dub

3,599, 3,600

Ding! Listening (Lv 1)

Listening is now Lv1! Although my Time sense has yet to level again, I've managed to get to Level 2! I just need to keep on going just like a certain little fish.

. . . 

Just keep counting,

Just keep listening.

What do we do?

We level.

. . . 

Or at least that's what I hope I will be able to keep doing. Otherwise it is going to be a long gestation period for me!

 

Level: 2
Experience: 0/400 Age: 2 days
Health: 20/20 Stamina: 7/7 Mana 10/10

Vitality: 2
Endurance: 1
Strength: 0
Dexterity: 0
Senses: 3
Mind: 47
Clarity: 1
Magic: 1

Free Points 20

Skills: Time sense (LV 2) Listening (LV 1)

Can I level two skills at the same time?

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