Chapter 18: 18. As Many Times…

Keith

“Cut.” When Mike’s voice rings out, Shiro jumps away from me, wearing a deer-in-the-headlights expression, and I have to stifle the groan that longs to escape my throat. We are supposed to pretend we’re reunited after a long absence, which leads to our characters almost kissing before being interrupted by Pidge, but Shiro looks like he’s stuck with his former high school bully, not a guy he carries a secret torch for.

Thirty fucking takes for one scene. While big movie production can employ up to a hundred takes for the more complicated stuff, we don’t have the same luxury. Shows rarely have the policy ‘as many times as it takes.’ No, they’re all about ‘time is money,’ so reshooting one scene over and over is not a reason for celebration. It wasn’t this one scene, either. Every moment we shared with Shiro was like pulling teeth. What happened to our chemistry from his auditions and the panel? The chemistry that apparently already prompted people to ship us? 

He seemed to do okay when shooting scenes with the rest of the cast earlier, unusually for a newbie. Still, I guess it’s not surprising he can follow orders. Because that’s what acting is, for the most part. Go there, stand on this mark, talk for five seconds and not a second longer. So the scenes he had with the guys, Allura, or all of us together went fine. No, it’s when we’re together that things go to shit. The fact we’re shooting parts of the romantic plot as the first scenes doesn’t help, but Shiro wanted to do it. Why does he act all skittish now? 

“You know what, guys? We’re losing daylight, and we’re not making any progress. Let’s wrap it for today, and circle back Monday morning, so Shiro, Keith, get your act together over the weekend, okay? I say this with love. Keith, a word.”

Mike says something to his AD, Axca, then waves me over. Shiro exchanges a couple of words with Hunk and Lance. With shoulders drawn back and deep grooves around his mouth that even make-up can’t cover, he looks miserable. My heart aches for him, but I’m also worried that hiring an inexperienced actor might have been a mistake that has the potential to complicate everything. 

I cross the set to talk with Mike. 

“What the fuck was that? Your first day shooting or…?”

“I’m sorry about Shiro.” 

“It’s not only Shiro. Watching you two together is painful. Did you forget how to act?” 

“No,” I grit out. What I am is uncomfortable about acting as a gay character, and my recent call with Kolivan only confirmed my worries. He gave me a fantastic lecture about how I’d be finished in Hollywood if my ‘secret’ got out. Only I didn’t realize he got so deep under my skin that it started affecting my performance. 

“Need I remind you it was you who wanted to hire him?”

“Guess I’m not entirely comfortable with the whole romance thing.” There. A partial truth. Better than nothing, no? But Mike doesn’t soften.

“You agreed to it, so get your head out of your ass and start behaving like a professional. Do you want to go through recasting Shiro? You should know what a hassle that would be, especially since fans already love him. Also, changing the scripts would be a pain.”

“What do you suggest I do?”

“I don’t care; just fix it.” 

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“Helpful. Thanks.” 

“I don’t know, Keith. Talk it through. Rehearse the scenes together. Call in an intimacy coordinator. Whatever you choose, we’re behind you. Just do something about it, okay?” 

“Yeah.”

Mike gives a terse nod and turns to the camera crew to thank them or give them pointers; I’m not sure. Don’t care, either. Not the stellar beginning of my dream project I imagined. This shooting was supposed to be fun after the endless grind of Weird Matters, the small, crappy parts I had before, or, oh my god, the commercials. Instead, it’s turning into a nightmare.

Okay, enough. Wallowing won’t help me here. Plus, Mike’s right. I’m a professional. I should behave like one, and since Shiro’s new, it’s up to me to come up with a solution and help him out. By the time I reach the house I’m renting for the shoot, I feel more optimistic about the whole thing. Everyone can have a rocky start from time to time, but you can’t give up when that happens.

It’s late, but I order takeout anyway, and as I’m munching through dinner, I shoot a message to Shiro.

Me: Can I come over?

The three annoying dots flounce around the screen for a long, long time. Then they dare to disappear with no message in tow. What the hell?

Me: We need to work on the scene.

This time, I get an answer. Hallelujah. 

Shiro: Tomorrow? I’m pretty wiped today.

I frown at the cell in my hand. So innocent, despite punching me in the gut with such a blatant brush-off.

Me: Sure, no problem. Good night, Shiro.

No other message arrives. Why should it, really? We set up the meeting, and Shiro owes me nothing. Still, disappointment niggles at me as I fall into bed, willing sleep to claim me. 

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