Chapter 73: Chapter 72: The Vestan Way

It was just an hour later that Alex and Hans found themselves addressing most of the VDF about the new changes (at least addressing those that weren’t currently on duty). The two most senior officers of the force stood in front of a small crowd of about forty soldiers while they detailed the new squad arrangements.

In the crowd was Jenna, and she was listening to what they had to say alongside the rest of Rick’s squad.

“I know this isn’t the most ideal setup,” said Alex after some grumbling could be heard in the crowd. “Believe me, I’d like nothing more than to form a few more squads to take some pressure off you. But it’s not something we can force through right now.”

“Why not?” called out someone from the crowd. “Do they want us to get mauled by bears in the dark now?”

That earned some more complaints from the rest of the force, which Alex quickly acknowledged. “We just don’t have the funding to expand the VDF any further right now. But I won’t stop petitioning the Council until they vote to give us the numbers we need.”

“Looks like Belladonna is being a stingy bitch again,” said someone close to Jenna, earning some snickers.

Alex didn’t deny that. “Listen, you know as well as I do what kind of political climate we’re in right now. This is one of those times when we have to make do with what we’ve got. I know that every member of the VDF is intelligent, capable, and resilient, and this entire city is going to rely on you in the tough days ahead. I know you’re going to do the best that you can, and that’s all I’m asking. For now though, we’re going to start this new squad arrangement tonight. Your lieutenants have all the details. This city and your officers owe each and every one of you a debt of gratitude. Thank you for all that you do to keep Vesta safe.”

With those words, the meeting was called to an end. Jenna watched as Alex descended the platform looking like a defeated man. She couldn’t blame him. It was a tough message to give, especially knowing that it would send some of the people in the room to their graves, all to satisfy one simple debt.

Even looking as haggard as he did, Jenna kept her distance. When Alex turned in her direction, she deliberately turned the other way so she didn’t have to make eye contact with him.

Nothing had changed from the last time they’d spoken, and as far as she was concerned, their relationship was over.

What really sucked about the whole thing was every time she felt the smallest amount of pity for the way she was treating him, she couldn’t help but think of him with Ellie. Even just the thought of their bodies together, with her legs wrapped around his waist, sent her into an angry fury.

Just like that, any pity she had died.

Jenna went to the VDF locker rooms to begin getting ready for her shift. In the process, she ran into Renee Jenning, who was also a member of Rick’s squad.

Ever since Jenna joined Rick’s squad a couple weeks back, she’d struck up a quick friendship with Renee who was as friendly as she was knowledgeable. The few times they’d been on the same shift, they’d managed to get a basic understanding of each other, and although they’d just scratched the tip of the iceberg, Jenna could already count her as being an easy confidante.

And tonight, Renee definitely seemed pissed.

“Stupid politicians,” growled Renee as she opened her locker aggressively, slamming it into another. “They’re trying to get us all killed again. Six squads! Can you believe this with our current numbers? The last time we had six squads was over a year ago, and back then, we had twenty extra people to lighten the load!”

“It definitely seems shortsighted,” admitted Jenna. “But what can we do? We’re not getting any extra recruits anytime soon.”

“Well, it’s a damn good thing we got all you new recruits when we did,” said Renee. “Otherwise, we’d really be stretched thin. I just don’t understand how the commander could let this be approved. It’s suicide!”

“I don’t think he had a choice,” replied Jenna. “I know Alex well enough and I believe him when he says he tried to fight for it with the rest of the Council. The problem is Belladonna, Cassara, and Serrano.”

Renee grunted. “I have a feeling Rooney would have fought harder for it.”

Jenna shook her head. “I really don’t think so, Renee. I know him. His heart’s in the right place.”

The sour look melted off of Renee’s face as she started to smirk at Jenna. “Oh, I know just how much you know him. You’re still his companion though, right? Any chance you can get him to reconsider this current squad deployment? Change his mind about it?”

Jenna quickly averted her eyes. “I really doubt that’s possible. Besides, we’re not exactly on speaking terms right now. Not even close.”

“Why? What happened?”

Jenna let out a deep sigh. “It’s just . . . complicated.”

Renee started to laugh. “Complicated? Don’t you know that complicated is the Vestan way? There’s only one reason why relationships get complicated in Vesta so let me ask you this. What’s the name of the slut whose bed you found him in?”

Jenna found herself turning red. “Was it that easy to figure out?”

“Like I said, it’s always the same thing in Vesta. So who was she?”

“Ellie Vesta,” replied Jenna, hating the way the name tasted as she spoke it.

“Jeez, he certainly swings for the fences, doesn’t he?” replied Renee, letting out a low whistle. “I can see why you’re pissed. Ellie might have her flaws but beauty isn’t one of them.”

Jenna gave her a deadpan look. “Thanks for the reminder. I’d almost forgotten.”

“So what are you going to do about it?”

“Do about it? Nothing. It’s over. If he wants to be with Ellie, then he can go do that. I’m not going to stop him.”

To Jenna’s surprise, Renee started to chuckle again.

“Oh, Jenna, come on now. Did you forget where you are?”

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Jenna let out a sigh. “It’s not that easy, Renee. I’m not from here. I haven’t lived here long enough to adapt to the way Vesta is regarding relationships.”

Renee pursed her lips. “Permission to speak frankly then? As a friend?”

“Sure, why not?”

“Do you like him?”

Jenna paled at such an upfront question. “What do you mean?”

“I think it’s obvious! Do you like him, Jenna? Yes or no.”

Jenna hesitated for several seconds before she was finally honest. “Yes.”

“How much?”

More hesitation followed. “Plenty enough. What’s with the questions?”

“Because you have to get over this Earth morality you brought with you,” replied Renee.

Jenna started shaking her head. “I don’t know how you do it. I still think of him with that slut sometimes and it makes me angry enough that I could hit something.”

Renee smiled fondly. “I remember those feelings well the first time my husband brought home his second wife, Abigail. If I remember right, I’m pretty sure I put my knee in his balls for it.”

Jenna actually smiled. “How did that go?”

“About as you would expect. We didn’t talk for weeks but then something happened that I didn’t expect. I missed him. I missed him terribly.”

Jenna let out another sigh. Though she didn’t want to admit it aloud, she also missed Alex terribly. She missed the feeling of his body against hers at night. She missed the way he kissed her. She missed the way it felt to be in his arms.

Mostly, she just missed the feeling of having a partner. She hated when he wasn’t nearby.

Renee smiled at her. “You’re thinking about him now, aren’t you? You miss him too?”

“You can say the wound is still a little raw,” Jenna admitted.

“It gets better with time, trust me.”

Jenna started to shake her head. “Seriously, how do you do it? How do you share? I’ve been trying to wrap my head around sharing a man ever since I found out about Vesta and I thought I could handle it when the time came. Granted, I never thought I’d find out about the other woman the way that I did but how do you do it?”

“You want the real answer? It helps to be friends with them,” replied Renee. “I love my husband’s wives like they’re sisters to me. That’s because they practically are. I made that a condition of my return—I had to get along with any other wives. And it was really hard at first to make common ground with Abigail but we did it. It just took some time, but I found that she was remarkably similar to me. And then when the third wife, Kat, came along, it went so much smoother. I can honestly tell you that all three of us are friends now and we keep our husband, Jack, happy as well as each other happy. I couldn’t imagine it any other way.”

Jenna really started to think that over, wondering what an arrangement would look like between herself, Alex, and Ellie. While she was thinking, Renee started speaking again.

“I guess the biggest question is can you ever be friends with Ellie? Because that’s going to be the biggest determinant of whether you move on or not.”

Jenna took a deep breath. “I just don’t know. I have so much resentment toward her that I don’t know if I could ever look at her the same way again. What she did was incredibly selfish and shortsighted.”

“Well, that’s the Vestas for you,” replied Renee. “Allen, her grandfather, was the same way. He was laser-focused on something when he wanted it, almost to the detriment of everything else. It was great for the colony because it meant he wouldn’t stop until he got what he wanted but Ellie also inherited some of that gumption. And it has just manifested itself in different ways. Now, do I think Ellie is a bad person? No, I don’t. But do I think she can be incredibly selfish at times? Well, I think you know the answer to that.”

“Ellie is only one part of this equation,” mumbled Jenna. “The other part is Alex. How could I ever trust him again, Renee? How do you do it? Don’t you just always have that voice in the back of your mind?”

Renee smiled. “I did at first but it goes away with time. At the end of the day, men are pretty simple creatures. I can boil it down to one statement really—they’ll never give you any trouble as long as you keep their stomachs full and their balls empty. And trust me, my husband is a very happy man. And we’re all happier for it. We’ve learned to get along and how to trust each other because this has all been worth it. I think that’s what you still need to decide. Just how much is this guy worth to you?”

That was the one question that Jenna didn’t want to answer. The truth was so complex that she couldn’t begin to unravel her feelings about Alex. How could she ever think to come back from the pain he inflicted on her? How could she just forgive and forget?

Jenna shut her locker as she finished getting dressed. “I just don’t think it’s possible, Renee. There’s just too much pain there.”

Renee patted her shoulder. “I’m not telling you to do one thing or another. You do what’s best for you and nothing else. If he’s not worth it, then he’s not worth it.”

Jenna felt her eyes start to become watery. “I wished it was that simple but it’s not. I just don’t see a way that I can come back from this.”

Renee’s instincts kicked in and she took the younger woman in her arms and held her tight. “You’re going to be just fine, Jenna. There will be other men, I promise you that.”

Jenna just wished that she believed her.

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