I was a mess. The choker around my neck constantly electroshocked me, burnt the skin around it and Aska tormented me to get what he wanted. His hand was currently under my ribcage, violently pushing my lungs to the side without caring a thing about me. All of my organs were pretty dead by now, but that didn’t stop him from grabbing my heart and slowly but surely pulling it out like it was candy. Unable to fall unconscious, or even die, I was forced to endure it as he retrieved my heart through my belly, only to lay it down directly in front of my eyes on my exposed chest.
“Still not willing to speak?” I winced and even if I wanted to tell him the banal truth now, I couldn’t. My lungs were horribly punctuated, deformed and failed completely. I couldn’t utter a single word. He said nothing more, grabbed my chin and forced me to look at the ceiling. My eyes, probably the only thing he didn’t touch, darted towards Aska, then away from him, and then again to him. He smiled sweetly as he opened my mouth and ripped a bit of my heart off, only to push it into my mouth.
It tasted horrible. Uncooked heart with my own blood was seriously not my thing …
Bit by bit, I was fed my own organs, all while I was electroshocked by the choker he placed around my neck earlier. I didn’t even twitch anymore. I just laid there, powerlessly and couldn’t move one bit, only felt the pain as it reduced my reasoning slowly but surely.
“Oh, you know … I have a meeting with a few farmers who want to sell their fruits to me. I kind of have to go now …” And he vanished, leaving me behind only to be electroshocked with increasing voltage, a ripped open belly, quite a few missing organs and bound to the table by chains and nails.
This bastard left me alone. At first, it was just a single day full of suffering, then a week. Before I knew it, it turned into a month. I would tell him anything at this point, I wouldn’t even dare to hide a single thing from him by then and considering how much pain I went through, he should believe me. But he still didn’t come. A year. A goddamn year, full of suffering, where my nervous system along with my brain was fried, again and again, only to heal once more.
Nobody could claim they wouldn’t get crazy by this. And I was not an exception. It is just that my starting point of craziness was a lot higher than from others. As such, I wasn’t even screaming anymore in the end, but rather giggled constantly whenever I was able to. For some reason, being cooked alive by electricity became strangely thrilling as I imagined all the other possibilities I could use electricity for. Even banging my head against the table didn’t help at all in regaining a clear head, but I still didn’t stop. And then, Aska came back when I was fried by electricity, banging my head against the table constantly and giggling like I was crazy. Well, I probably went a bit crazy.
“Oh, shit.” He left me alone for quite some time and I was in no condition to form any coherent thought, thus, I didn't even register how Aska came back. He swiftly disabled the choker and pulled out the nails. He even healed me, but my mental state didn’t change much. I still stared into the air, completely devoid of anything. From time to time, I still giggled, even though my mind was emptied of any thoughts.
He tried to fix this issue in many ways but failed spectacularly each time. He gave me time to heal my mental scars by myself, laid me down to sleep and even tried to get any reaction by hurting me once more. I only giggled in return like a mentally insane. I didn´t know how long I spent in that state as time seemed to flash by in front of my eyes.
Only as he threw me into a tub of water did my instincts kick in and I flailed around wildly. I saved myself from the water quickly afterwards and slowly began to regain my will incredibly fast, driven by the angst of water.
“wow … that was so much fun” I concluded after one more day of resting in the barn and laughed crazily, only to realize that I was rather close to losing myself again. “She told me you did something to me. That my whole life is a lie … and that you lied about the seed of life.”
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“That’s all?” I nodded weakly, leaning against the bathtub while I stared at the ground between my legs. “Alright … you did well.” Anger started to boil up inside me, but I still didn’t move one bit. I felt so tired, so spent that I just wanted to go to bed.
“Could you … reincarnate Luna to Solaris?”
“You mean her?” He grabbed my hair and forcefully made me look upwards. Luna stood there, without any emotions and stared straight ahead. She wore the clothing from the day of her death, but also a choker I knew too well. “Now that we have solved the issue of the goddess, let´s solve the second one. Your feelings are standing in the way. I never thought you would develop strong emotions to anyone in all honesty. Do you even realize how much they hinder your progress already?”
“No … please …” Luna opened her eyes wide as she was dragged out of her trance. “please … not her.” I looked up towards Aska and shrank back as I noticed his emotions. He looked at me just like that time all these years ago, full of disgust and anger.
“Hmm, I wonder how this will play out.” He said and vanished instantly, leaving only a Luna and me behind.
“Hi Luna. I missed you.” I said and smiled weakly while trying to get a grip of myself and stop myself from laughing.
“I … where are we?” She asked in a daze.
“Purgatory…” I said.
“You are dead as well?” So she knew she was dead. At least her memories weren’t wiped yet.
“No, I …” I started to explain everything. At least the things I could without worry. I told her who I was, why I was on Solaris and what happened after she died. She was happy that I survived and glad she understood my way of thinking soon enough. All in all, it went exactly as she planned, although she did hope that the flood would end them once and for all. She, or rather her magic, knew from the very beginning what I was capable of as soon as she saw me standing beside the corpses. I was able to fool everyone, but this simple-minded mage saw right through my disguise and surprisingly didn´t condemn me for my character.
In any case, I had to tell her two hundred and ten years of my life and that took time.
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