“Auuuuuu!” I howled into the night, pretending to be a hungry wolf. A few of the guards, sitting by a campfire nearby, clapped into their hands and laughed loudly. Amused, I curtsied towards them, even though the whore was already getting on with it.
“Milady, there is a pack of wolves in the distance!” She said theatrically, with her hand in front of her mouth. Shocked, that bitch stared into the dark forest around us. “And I can hear a few civilians as well!” She exclaimed, pointing towards nothing in particular.
“My guards, my trusted companions, now is our time to save these poor souls from the menace we were hunting for days! For the kingdom!” Hannah said, standing on a wooden box and pointing in the same direction, a little bit upwards though.
“Eww… I give you a four.” I said, shaking my head in disappointment.
“Three.” The whore commented drily.
“What have I done wrong this time?” Hannah asked, slowly getting off the box because she struggled with the frilly dress.
“Your left hand for example. Someone who holds speeches regularly never lets it hang down to their side … I don’t know, ball it into a fist and hold it in front of your heart or so.” I said and winked to the guards who were amusing themselves with a bit of alcohol we brought from a travelling trader.
“Your voice was wavering.” The whore commented, and I had to agree. She was slightly off as she mentioned the poor souls.
“You are always quarrelling, but now you are on the same page?” Hannah commented, which was fair to be honest as that whore and I couldn’t stand each others presence … at all.
“Do you think I like agreeing with her?” I muttered and noticed how the whore nodded in approval. “Hey, stop agreeing!” I glared at her in anger, while she looked at me as if I drunk a bit too much.
“Why is she here? It is clearly not working out between the two of you.” Hannah interjected, probably knowing where this would go.
“You haven’t told her?” The whore asked in wonder.
“Hmm? I think I did … or maybe not?” I uttered, scratching my cheek in amazement. I was sure I told her why the whore was with us yesterday … but maybe I was too wasted for that inside the room of the inn.
“Hannah, what could I teach you?” The whore said, smiling lecherously.
“Eww … Lucy, I don’t like where this is going.” Hannah said, slowly backing off the whore who pretended to squeeze onto something.
“Chill, it is only weird in the beginning.” I commented, smiling brightly as the whore and I made fun of Hannah´s reaction.
“I will not do that.” She said, swiping through the air with her hand vertically.
“What´s wrong with doing that?” The whore asked, creeping towards Hannah who backed off against the carriage.
“I don’t know either. Maybe she took my drugs?” I said, chuckling lightly as Hannah balled her hands into fists. This would be quite interesting. Amused, I sat down on a nearby chest and enjoyed the unfolding spectacle.
“Don’t worry, I will treat you like a princess if you want. Or you can be a guard as well. I can be whatever you want my darling.” The whore said, placing her hands on Hannah´s shoulders. Usually, she would have been boxed by Hannah already, but the nearby guards stopped her from doing anything rash as we were in plain sight.
“Lucy!” She shouted, looking at me pleadingly.
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“… ten points.” I said and clapped loudly.
“Perfect execution.” The whore said, finally letting go of the perplexed elf.
“What?” She asked, not really understanding the situation.
“We are improving your skills as an actress, my dear maid. And I don’t know anyone who can do so better than her.” I pointed towards the whore with a bright smile on my face.
“Aye! I can play every character. The innocent schoolgirl, the naughty tavern owner, a masochist …” She must have picked up my glares when her explanation went in a rather weird direction. “well, you name it.”
“You can even impersonate Lucy?” Hannah asked, strangely enthusiastic to switch the topic, after realizing she just made a fool out of herself.
“… I would say I´m way too good at it at this point.” The whore said awkwardly, making me burst out in laughter.
“Tell me, how do I do that?” Hannah asked, ignoring my wheezing for the time being.
“I … I really don’t like impersonating her that much … so if we could rather talk about a different person …” The whore muttered underneath her breath.
“No, please, enlighten us!” I exclaimed, stood up and walked over to her. I stared into her eyes as she tried to walk backwards, only to be stopped by a way too curious Hannah.
“Soo …” She started, looking into my hate-filled eyes. I only waited for her to provoke me. So far, I couldn’t hurt her at all, but this dark forest gave me the perfect opportunity. “you know how she sometimes tilts her head to the side … she does it if she is thinking, or interested in something.”
She started of great, but I didn´t want her to stop at all. At some point, she would say something bad about me.
“And try to smile whenever you can … and if she is angry, her right eyelid twitches … but she doesn’t do any of that if she is acting as another person … That’s all there is, she has a flat character otherwise.” The whore said, turned around and dashed away towards the guards. Flat? Wasn’t it supposed to be shallow … except she did it on purpose.
“Flat? Who are you calling flat?” I muttered, looking down in frustration.
“And here we go again …” Hannah said, placing her palm on her forehead in desperation.
“No, no, no. This time, I will act like a responsible adult.” I breathed in deeply and folded my hands together.
“Your eyelid is twitching…” She said, making me stop it immediately.
“Screw this, I´m going to torture her tonight.” I said while smiling innocently.
“I´m not sure you would want that.” Hannah said, pointing behind me. As I turned around, I could barely see how the whore vanished inside one of the tents the guards put up … not alone obviously.
“Okay … let´s ignore that she touched you, shall we?”
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