Chapter 187: Gideon

"Are you OK?", Travis asked Talia when Ashley and Heather were out of the earshot.

Talia nodded, but her expression was not good.

She wanted to retaliate and to tell those two women that they were wrong, but somehow… everything they said sounded right. Maybe that was a reality check she needed.

The truth was that Talia didn't know, what is she to Damon? A nobody? A pet? He called her so many names, from Mrs. Blake to kitten, and Talia didn't know if any of those would last.

Did he mean it, or was that just sweet-talk with a purpose to trick her?

From the beginning, Talia knew Damon as a moody Alpha. He would do what he wanted, when he wanted, with whom he wanted… and that included sleeping around.

Talia was dejected at the thought that Damon slept with those two… Ashley and Heather. Is there a girl who didn't spread her legs for him? But who was Talia to judge them when she was the same?

Talia hoped that maybe, just maybe, she started figuring him out, but maybe she was wrong. How could someone like her, uneducated, ignorant, and without background, be comparable to Damon?

She had fun at the party, and she was confident that the magic will last, but it was broken, and the reality reminded her that she can't take care of herself and that she was brave only when Damon was by her side. She was useless.

Travis touched Talia's chin, making her look up at him, and he said, "I don't know what that was about, but you shouldn't concern yourself with people who don't have better things to do than to poke their noses where it doesn't belong."

Talia looked at Travis and she observed his genuinely worried expression. It reminded her of Olivia.

When Talia was sad, Olivia would give her a comforting hug, but Talia knew that this was not Olivia and that even if Travis gave her a hug, it wouldn't solve anything because this was not his problem to solve.

Or maybe Travis's concern was not genuine. Maybe Talia had a problem of seeing things she wanted to see, and everyone was laughing behind her back because a nobody like her dared to stand next to Damon, like she was important.

Talia's heart tightened with every next thought, and it was difficult to breathe.

She felt her eyes prickling and she knew that tears were coming, but she didn't want to cry here, in front of the library, for Doctor Travis and who-knows-who to see.

"I am sorry for making you come here, Doctor Travis", Talia said. "I apologize for wasting your time, but I don't feel like picking a book right now. I would like to be alone."

Travis helplessly watched Talia as she swiftly disappeared between the buildings.

…

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Talia thought that she might burst into crying, but she didn't.

She walked through the forest absentmindedly, and she lost track of time.

Talia knew that she should think about what to do next because just wandering aimlessly was stupid, but her mind was muddled with indistinct thoughts, and she just let it be.

She was emotionally numb, and this was not the first time. Talia knew this feeling because she would go there wherever the reality was too hard to bear. It was her way of shielding herself until the storm passes.

Eventually, this will stop, and she will be able to think again.

After an unknown measure of time, Talia emerged on a meadow that was full of wildflowers. She took a deep breath, allowing a mix of scents to enter her system, and then she sat on the ground, leaning her back on a tall rock.

Talia wondered, what was she doing? Why was she here in this meadow instead of going to the packhouse? But somehow… that packhouse didn't feel like home.

Can she be near Damon and not fall apart every time she remembers that she was nothing special to him?

Yes, Damon said that he gave her many of his firsts but how can Talia believe those words when Damon slept with nearly every young woman she met?

If she thinks about this rationally, the best thing would be to cut her ties with him and stop this madness before it spirals even further.

Should she move to live in one of the buildings with Omegas?

However, staying in the Dark Howlers pack without being with Damon sounded impossible and she started going over her plans which she put on pause not so long ago… plans for her independence and leaving.

Her heart ached at the thought of leaving, but what were her options?

Talia told herself many times to enjoy this patch of happiness while it lasts, but how can she enjoy the moment of sunshine while clouds are gathering from all directions?

Damon was like sunshine. Warm, soothing, hot, and steamy, and she really missed his scent of the forest and the dark chocolate that was impossible to forget.

Talia was happy when Damon's attention was on her and his embrace had an effect of calming her personal demons, but these moments, like the one with Ashley and Heather, were unbearable.

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The higher she flew with Damon, the harder she would fall every time she realized that every moment she cherishes was nothing special for him.

Talia told herself that she is stupid. She was not supposed to fall for Damon. She repeated in an endless loop that being close to him won't bring anything good and now… she was lost, unsure what to do, because no matter what she did, it looked like a path to disaster.

Her eyes widened when she realized that a pair of worn-out slippers was in front of her, and she looked up in slow-motion to see an older man with a frown looking down at her.

Talia scrambled to her feet, and she wanted to go backward and put some distance between the man and herself, but there was that blasted rock, and she was not sure if she can jump over it without tripping.

How did he get so close without her noticing? How could she be so distracted and not realize that a stranger got so close to her?

Talia nervously glanced left and right, and she confirmed that there was no one else.

It was just her and this older man whose sun-kissed skin told her that he spends a lot of time outdoors. But his trousers and t-shirt were neat and clean, and he didn't look like a wanderer. Actually, if not for his frown, she would think of him as a scholarly wise man. 

"Why are you here?", he asked.

Talia pressed her lips into a line and hugged her purse tightly against her chest. She couldn't come up with a lie about why she was there, and she didn't want to tell him the truth either.

"Don't worry", he said. "If I wanted to hurt you, I would do it the moment you stepped into my garden."

Talia's eyebrows shoot up. "Garden?" It was obviously a meadow with wildflowers.

He hummed and gestured while talking, "That's the area with chamomile, there is echinacea, feverfew, behind it is goldenseal…"

Talia realized he was right, but it still looked random for a garden. She just assumed that flowers grew there on their own because there was no landscaping or a fence she could see.

"…thistle, and there is…" He stopped talking when Talia's stomach rumbled.

Talia was embarrassed. Normally, skipping a meal or two was no big deal, but lately, she was eating well and now that she skipped lunch, her stomach was protesting. Loudly.

He let out a long breath. "My house is behind those trees. How about you follow me, and I give you something to eat?"

Seeing that Talia didn't move, he made a face. "I told you already. If I wanted to hurt you, I would do it a while ago. Come with me or stay here. It's your choice. Actually, if you are going to reject my offer for food, I will appreciate it if you get out of my garden."

Talia looked at his retreating back and wondered if she should go after him.

She concluded that he is definitely from the Dark Howlers pack. After all, she didn't walk that far and since he has a home here… Her stomach rumbled again, and her legs moved to follow after the man. She was hungry.

Talia thought how it was silly to be defensive because he is probably a werewolf, and he could catch her and snap her into two without blinking.

…

It was a small and cozy cabin-like home with one open area that had a kitchen, a dining table for four people, and a sitting area with a sofa and two chairs. On the right, there were two closed doors for which Talia guessed are bedroom and bathroom.

Talia inhaled scents of lavender and basil, and there were also mint and several other plants that mixed together into something sweet and soothing.

The man put on the table bread, yogurt, cherry tomatoes, and a plate with sliced smoked meat.

He gestured for her to sit with the question, "Tea?"

"Yes, please." She would take anything. Talia looked at the food and swallowed the saliva that pooled into her mouth.

"Thank you for the food.", she said.

"You are far from Darkbourne."

"How do you know I came from there?"

"Humans who wander in this area on foot would have backpacks with food and drinks, yet you have a skinny purse.", he responded, and Talia thought how that made sense. "You didn't answer my question, why were you in my garden?"

"I wanted some time for myself, so I started walking. The forest is peaceful and… I didn't mean to trespass into your garden. My name is Talia."

"Talia", he repeated. "You can call me Gideon."

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Gideon, the Shaman of the Dark Howlers pack. You can see his pic in the comments.

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