The Average DC Experience

Chapter 47: Distraction #47


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'I can't lie here...' I firmed my resolve and stored my helmet in my inventory as I turned to Batman, keeping my expression neutral. The caped crusader wouldn't be here if he didn't already know everything there is to know about me, and keeping the helmet on would only make me look like I was clinging to straws.

"Me? No. Harley already knows most of the things I don't want her to know about me," I replied with a shrug, briefly turning to Harley and then back to the caped crusader. "You, on the other hand, have much that you wouldn't want her to her, her, or anyone else to know, I'd imagine..." I added, letting a slight meaningful smile tug on my lips.

"Wouldn't you agree, Mr. playboy billionaire, Bruce Wayne?" I asked, raising an eyebrow as I intently observed Batman, and much to the man's credit, he didn't even flinch, didn't twitch, and didn't move a single muscle at the revelation of his secret.

'If even Selina barely reacted when I put her on the spot, it would make sense for this guy not to react at all...'

"Is that a threat?" the caped crusader asked, his tone noticeably colder, and I even noticed the cowl's white eyes narrow at me. How the hell did that even possible. Damned comic book logic right there.

He didn't confirm my words and didn't bother to deny it, which is a problem since I already had an explanation for how I figured out his identity, and it was part of the plan rapidly formulating in my head as we spoke.

'Oh well, I just need to push the conversation in that direction, even at the risk of sounding vain...'

"A mere display of capability, nothing more, nothing less," I replied, gesturing to the side as I shrugged my shoulders. "It was simple. Anyone with a brain and an internet connection could do it," I added, losing my smile as I assumed a blank expression.

My acting might work on someone like Selena, but I doubt I'll get one over the world's greatest detective, so I might as well put on a poker face and hope for the best.

And although I can make Selina back down by threatening her with her identity, I doubt the same strategy would work on Batman because his entire persona was based on being uncompromising.

I couldn't threaten him, and I doubt I could beat him either, which I wouldn't do even if it that within my capability since the League is sure to come knocking next.

I needed to impress him, convince him I was not a threat and that his time would be better spent doing something else, like dealing with Intergang, Black Mask, or the mastermind behind this mess, and I had just the thing in mind.

"Believe it or not, there are fan sites out there that took it upon themselves to measure the top speed of the Batmobile and Batplane," I explained, letting out a genuine chuckle of amusement despite myself because I couldn't help it.

I wasn't lying, and such information was merely one internet search away, along with information about other costumed heroes, such as their most remarkable feats and rough measurements of their speed, power, and abilities.

"Once anyone had that, they'd only need to calculate how fast it took you to arrive whenever an incident happened..." I added, gesturing to the side as I resumed a blank demeanor. 

"From there, it's only a matter of measuring the distance you traveled to get there based on simple math and creating a parameter around the area," I remarked, momentarily pausing to clear my throat.

"Repeating the process and locating the point where the parameters cross would lead to your lair beneath the Wayne manor," I concluded, shrugging my shoulder as if what I'd just said was the most natural thing in the world.

It was, and I'm more than sure anyone could do it if they were smart enough, but I didn't do it myself because I didn't think the caped crusader would come knocking so soon, which is why I didn't say I did it, merely that anyone could do it, so I wasn't lying technically.

"Interesting theory. Smart, despite being flawed," Batman spoke after hearing my words, finally breaking his silence, and I could swear I detected a hint of amusement in his tone.

"The internet is unreliable as an information source. I could have easily published false information myself to confuse people like you," the caped crusader added, the slight amusement I detected earlier disappearing, replaced by a neutral tone.

"Not to mention I could choose not to move at full speed to mislead people further. You are optimistic and naïve," he added, crossing his arms in front of his chest as he paused, waiting for me to reply.

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'Wait... is he testing me something...?' I paused for a second, raising an eyebrow. Batman didn't bother to deny it at first, and he still wasn't denying it, merely questioning my theory and trying to egg me on.

"I'm sure you published false information, but that doesn't mean reliable information doesn't exist on the internet," I replied, shaking my head in dismissal. "One would only need to try everything and settle on the result that would make the most sense," I added, shrugging my shoulders while gesturing to the side.

"Like the residence of one of the few people in Gotham who can afford the gadgets you use on a daily basis, for example," I remarked, slightly raising my arms apart.

"And even if such information doesn't exist on the internet..." I added, trailing off as I scratched my head. "Anyone with access to the city's surveillance system and a sufficient level of tech-savvy could figure it out on their own," I concluded with a careless shrug of my shoulders to emphasize how trivial I found the whole thing to be.

"As for the other points, it's impossible because you, Mr. Wayne, are a hero," I said, regarding the caped crusader with a smile as I shook my head. "People's lives depend on how fast you can react to incidents," I matter-of-factly concluded, pausing to see the man's reaction. 

"Impressive, but as I've said, optimistic and naïve," the caped crusader said, shaking his head in disapproval. "I don't know what you hope to gain by telling me all this, but you've only managed to oust yourself as a bigger threat," he added, firmly gesturing to the side.

"Your display, as you call it, changes nothing. You are a criminal, and you've just proven yourself to be a dangerous one," he added, pausing again and waiting for me to reply.

'Yup, he's definitely testing me... but to what end?' I paused again but quickly dropped the subject to form a reply.

"What I did, what I do, and what I'll do, everything is for survival," I replied, shaking my head with a bitter laugh. "I know things, Mr. Wayne, many things that drive me to improve, grow stronger, and do what I do," I added, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath.

"World conquering aliens, bloodthirsty demons, and unjust gods walk among us..." I added as I opened my eyes and let out the breath I'd been holding. "I refuse to let myself die at the hands of such beings, only to spend an eternity in the afterlife of some jumped-up cosmic elemental," I added, firmly shaking my head and gritting my teeth in frustration.

I was not lying. A big part of what drove me to grow stronger was to avoid suffering such a fate. I'd already experienced death once, and although I didn't want to go through that shit again, what scared me the most was what would come next.

"Then you should have gone to the League. That's why they exist, to defend the people from such threats" he replied, his tone sounding even more disapproving.

"I think not. How many times has Superman been brainwashed and almost destroyed entire countries? How many times have the other heroes?" I asked with a scowl, snorting in disdain.

"Besides, what guarantee do I have that the League members wouldn't simply deem me too dangerous because of my knowledge?" I asked, dismissively gesturing to the side.

"What guarantee do I have that they won't simply lobotomize me as they did to Doctor Light and many others?" I asked again, and Batman visibly frowned at my question this time.

"The League would never--" Batman quickly replied, prepared to defend his friends and colleagues. However, he stopped mid-sentence, and I knew I'd struck gold.

'Bingo...' I barely held my glee at the caped crusader's reaction.

"Oh.. now that's rich... you don't know, do you?" I asked, grinning in amusement as I watched the caped crusader still after I finally caught him off guard.

"Better yet, you do know. It's just that you don't remember..." I added, pushing the point as I let out a slight chuckle, to which the caped crusader grunted in pain and held his forehead.

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