“….Crying, uh…after all the tears….it’s….an ugly look…” his shoulders dropped with a look of helplessness and seemed to sink into the ground.
His shoulders hunched and a sullen air surrounded him. He suddenly bowed below his knees.
“What’s the matter? I said it was fine.’ Kalia couldn’t figure out what was wrong but she still reached out and tapped him on the shoulder to indicate that she really was fine.
His eyes that had been filled with embarrassment finally lightened a little though it was still rimmed red.
Kalia sat down beside him, the sheep enclosure’s fence at her back.
Leaning back comfortably, she said, “You still seem to love your wife very much Allen.”
“…Well, I don’t remember that feeling, but I still feel a little numb when I think of her.”
“Are you sad?”
Smiling, he looked up to the sea of stars, “I’m not really anymore. I miss her but I think I’m a little far from feeling sad.”
Hesitatingly, he opened up about another of his innermost thoughts, “I don’t want to shroud my memories of Nadia in sadness. Anyway, I want her to be a person who gives me happiness even when she’s not around, not a person who gives me negative emotions.”
“You still seem to love her very much.”
“Even if she is gone now, my past of loving her doesn’t,” he said shily, suddenly looking at Kalia.
“Isn’t the father of your child a loved one?”
Kalia thought for a moment before carefully answering, “It’s not someone I don’t love but at the same time, I can’t say I love you.”
“So…..it was a friend,” Allen concluded.
Kalia looked at Allen with amazement in her eyes. How did he know?
Seeing the look in her eyes, Allen smiled back tenderly, “Ms. Kalia seems to be easier to understand than I thought. When I didn’t know you well, I was a little scared.”
“You’re scared of me?”
Seeing the change in Kalia’s gaze, Allen continued in a hurry, “You’re very charismatic! Oh, you’re still charismatic now but you’re more honest than I thought. You seem to have a lot of affection and….that’s not a bad thing.”
“Yes, I know. Allen, don’t be scared. I’m sorry….”
“Oh,” he laughed after scratching his head for a bit, not sure how to continue.
With the lapse in conversation, the two looked up at the sky together to admire the stars. The further away from the capital they were, the closer the stars in the sky seemed.
“If you don’t mind….may I ask why you want to have this baby alone?” Allen asked after a while.
“It’s okay. You’re my doctor. I think you have the right to know to some extent.”
“Thank you for your trust and for saying that.”
Kalia laughed for a moment at Allen’s polite words.
“In fact, I thought I couldn’t have children and I was mentally prepared for the fact but that doesn’t mean I don’t wish to have children. Though I didn’t mean to, I somehow became pregnant with this child and… it really feels like a blessing. This baby is a miracle to me. And, I want to birth this miracle into a life filled with happiness. I want to raise them with love.”
Allen silently listened to Kalia’s story.
“Though the child is a blessing to me, it can be completely different in the eyes of someone else. They have a given position, a different status, different circumstances and different thoughts from me. I don’t want to force them to take responsibility for my mistakes. Now that I’m with his child… I don’t even want to see him….”
My child. The baby was just my child. She was determined to be a good mother and raise this child happily.
Kalia patted her stomach.
Although she could not see this child yet, it was as if she could distinctively detect the child’s presence and warmth, through her careful caress full of love.
“I just want this child to be born into happiness,” Her voice was firm and very powerful, full of determination and affection.
The Empire’s best swordsman was going to be a mother.
She, who was not afraid of death, has given up all the honor and status she had accumulated her whole life for the small life that was going to be born; she left that path purely for the safety of her child.
There was a powerful certainty in her eyes and Allen couldn’t help but be fascinated by it.
“…I’m sure you’ll make a good mother.”
Turning to Allen, she answered with a smile, “Thank you.”
It was the happiest expression he had seen her make.
***
The next day, Kalia felt a little queasy as soon as she woke up.
Allen had told her it was about time for her to start having morning sickness. Fortunately, the nausea soon faded away.
The elderly couple that had so kindly offered them the room for the night found out that she was pregnant and prepared them a meal of warm milk, soft spinach prata1 and freshly baked five-grain bread.
Though simple, the warm food was very nutritious.
“My morning sickness was always very bad when I was pregnant. Whenever it flared up, my mother would cook me a lot of soft and warm food and give me sweet and sour yogurt to finish it all off. It was very refreshing,” the wife reminisced.
“Thank you,” Kalia gracefully thanked.
“I can’t believe you’re making this journey alone… Where’s your husband? To be pregnant and only have your brothers to accompany you… it’s been hard on you, especially since you’re still in the early stages of pregnancy,” the wife laminated, quite blunt with her thoughts.
Kalia became a little embarrassed.
She had told them all this information so easily, feeling that they were a simple, sweet elderly couple but now, she was a little afraid that Simon, who might follow after her, would find out she was pregnant through them.
‘The fairies already know…. I wonder if this couple will also tell you. This’ll just be the confirming factor for Simon if the couple does say something… No, they2 don’t know who I am so it’ll be fine. I’m wearing a disguise after all.’ Kalia’s thoughts were a bit of a mess.
She couldn’t go back now anyways. She only hoped that the couple wouldn’t mention it.
Thinking up to here, she decided she still had to take some preventative measures. She needed to be more careful. Determined to hide her identity more thoroughly, she bowed her head slightly and tried to put on a wry expression.
“As a matter of fact, I…” she deliberately trailed off, her words seemingly stuck in her throat as if she was trying to broach a subject that was hard to speak about.
“I ran away from my husband. He was never home because he was out gambling and drowning himself in women and booze. He…has a lot of women and I finally couldn’t stand it anymore. So… I’m running away,” Kalia wove a sob story on the spot.
“ W-what? Oh my God! Your husband is a piece of crap!” The kind elderly lady flared up in anger.
“No, it’s my fault that I didn’t even know what kind of man he was before getting married.”
Her acting was somewhat awkward but, truthfully, that awkwardness only helped to authenticate Kalia as the woman in her story. Combined with the natural, casual air she had about her, it really sold her story.
The farmer couple were angry at the nonexistent garbage husband on her behalf. Kalia kept her head down. Her sad eyes were trained on the floor while she chewed on the mixed-grain bread as if she was lost in melancholy.
Seeing Kalia’s acting and sudden change in attitude, Humming and Allen almost spewed out the milk they were drinking.
In surprise, Allen blankly tried to process the situation and he watched Kalia with a slightly dazed expression. Humming, on the other hand, was quick-witted and had already figured out the situation.
Suddenly, a tear slid down Humming’s face.
“…Wuuuu. Thinking about all of the hardships my sister’s had to go through…!” Humming immediately slipped into her role as Kalia’s sister. She, who had been eating mixed-grain bread with blueberry jam, cried loudly on the spot, soaking her bread with her sudden downpour of tears.
‘W-what? All of a sudden? What’s happening?’ Allen’s brain short-circuited. When the two women started acting at the same time, Allen, who was caught in the middle, sat there frozen, not knowing what to do.
‘What a tactless man you are,’ Humming mentally rebuked, seeing him in his dazed state. Discreetly, she poked him in the ribs. Startled, Allen quietly lowered his gaze and only gave a clumsy and strained sad smile.
Even though Allen was a lost cause, Kalia flashed Humming a quick look of pride. She had very quickly assessed the situation and reacted accordingly, as if she were an extension of Kalia’s own limbs.
To finish off the act, Kalia asked the old lady with a very sad voice, “….and by the way, please don’t tell anyone that you saw us. I’m afraid might husband might come after me”
“Don’t worry young lady! I won’t say a word. I’ll pretend you were never here!”
“Thank you…. Sir, the bread is really good, by the way.”
“I’ll wrap a few loaves for you to bring with you!”
“Oh, you don’t have to… But I will accept it and eat it with gratitude if you do,” Kalia smiled nicely and sipped her warm milk.
This was her first time acting like this and she though impromptu, she felt it really paid off.
***
Simon returned to the capital with no profit.
Upon his return, he immediately headed to Kalia’s mansion.
He had wrecked her house the first day he was back to find Kalia but, by now, Kalia’s mansion was in the process of being restored to its original appearance before it was destroyed.
Restoration spells used mana to reverse the flow of time and in actuality, it was a very tricky type of magic.
It wasn’t something that could be done with just one hand or a few easy cantations. Depending on the range and intricacy of the intended restoration, the spell required extreme mana consumption.
In order to restore a mansion of this size, even if it was a high-class wizard, they would have to pour at least 70% of their mana.
Of course, it wasn’t very easy magic for Simon either.
He also poured a considerable amount of mana into restoring Kalia’s mansion.
It was only 20-30% compared to the other wizards.
However, it didn’t matter if it took more than 90% of his mana to restore her mansion. To him, this was nothing short of a waste.
To him, anything related to Kalia was never a waste.
It was a magic that could recover her ‘presence’ and what’s a little physical pain compared to her scent disappearing? It was nothing.
Simon reached her bed with weary steps and sank onto the ground besides it.
Tipping his head back and pressing it into the soft mattress, he murmured helplessly in a strained voice, his eyes closed to take in her scent, “Where the hell…. Where the hell did you go Kalia?”
His heart throbbed and tightened as it had many times over the past few days. *His head was throbbing so much he felt like it could burst.
It had only been three days.
Three days without her. 3
Until he found Kalia again, he would have to endure each night of agony. Why did she leave?
Though the two of them may not hold the same type of love for each other, , there was still their ‘brotherhood’ or ‘friendship’ forged over the years from blood.
Yet, she hadn’t told him anything and simply vanished from existence.
Rather than a sense of betrayal…. The pain of being abandoned was all he could feel and it was heartbreaking. Did he amount to only this much in Kalia’s eyes?
One moment he was angry, the next he was sad.
The feeling in his chest matched his violent mood swings. One moment his head and heart were seething, but in the next, the both immediately sunk to the ground, as if dosed with cold water.
‘Was.. that night the problem? If we hadn’t spent that night together, would Kalia have left me without a backwards glimpse? If I hadn’t been willing to indulge in the sweetness and pleasure of being in her embrace? ….If I could turn back time, could I stop that night?’ Simon couldn’t help but imagine.
No, it was impossible. Simon couldn’t resist her kiss.
He couldn’t help but fall even harder for her with the sweetness of their kiss.
First of all, he didn’t regret that night.
But, but… did Kalia regret that night?
“I might really go crazy at this rate,” Simon groaned.
Only three days.
Three. 4
Simon dared not crawl onto her bed. He only reached a hand out to touch the tip of her quit, swallowing a sigh. Pulling on the soft blanket, he turned and carefully leaned his forehead into the ledge of the bed. The familiar scent that reminded him of her set Simon’s heart alight again.