Chapter 133: Howl Of Loss - Part【7】

My breathing harshens to conceal my excruciating heartache and I shake my head in objection my lips quivering I do not like this, I do not like this at all. I take stumbling steps backwards away from the sickening sight that repulses me.

"I love you." She whispers as she coils her arms around his neck and drags him down to her. Phobos visibly stiffens under her touch as though he had predicted what she was going to do for she angles her face to the side and crushes her lips to his and my male...lets her kiss him. My male does not shove her away but remains still permitting her to do as she pleases.

Silence.

Betrayal they say comes in the night as a devil would with its sharpened claws so it can thrust them into your chest and rip out your beating organ depriving you of your will to live. Watching another female kiss the lips that belong to me shreds me apart to the point that I fight to give way to my lungs, for my ribs compress around my heart even tighter the bones piercing into the delicate flesh. Raw anguish, I thought I had felt it when I came to know of my infertility but this here cannot compare. This here rots my flesh.

My eyes do not leave my male who has my favourite ocean blues set on the wall of the tent behind Moira as she lovingly kisses him. It is not a deep kiss there is no tongue or passion, she kisses him like a juvenile yet it is still a kiss for I will never look at his lips the same again. They are tainted to me now. I wonder what he feels at this moment? Is he thinking about me of how I would be waiting for him in another tent? Does he see this as a betrayal?

Drakho has his gaze focused on his feet, his head bowed with respect to what Phobos is doing and bile climbs up the back of my throat. His Alpha is going against his female, his queen and he thinks he is doing something righteous. Then the truth finally dawns on me, this is not the first time this has occurred. Phobos had let Moira kiss him whenever she got drunk plenty of times before. His lips had never truly belonged to me, had they?

Muffled sobs vacate my chest as I clamp my palm over my mouth stifling my cries of torture. Every loving word, every affectionate look Phobos gave me was all a lie. If he truly did love me as he claimed to he would never allow this. He would never do this to me.

I had been foolish so utterly blinded by love. In a way, it was always me who had been running after him chasing after him begging for his attention but never once did he do the same for me. Where had my self-respect gone to? Had I slaughtered it after he abandoned me when I was eighteen? I shut my eyes taking in a deep breath as tears of agony spew down my cheeks. He knows how I feel about his relationship with Moira how I suffered because of their despicable bond yet this is what he does in hiding.

The despair of being betrayed is truly unendurable. I place my palm over my barren womb and bawl harder. Perhaps if I had something else to love other than my mate I could be stronger than this and confront this situation with strength but with him being the only one I have it makes it more arduous. But I cannot get past this, I cannot forgive him for this sin. Ever. He will face the consequences of his actions I will make sure of it.

Whirling around on my heels brushing my tears of suffering away with the rear of my palms I march back to the clamorous celebration smiling at wolves along the way greeting them with terse nods as a Luna should. I will not show any weakness in front of them.

Spotting an unopened bottle of liquor I seize it from the table and gulp it down ignoring the bitter taste of it that torches the rear of my throat. I had always found the heartbroken females getting drunk at the bar back home ridiculous yet here I am here doing the very same. I understand it now, this is the only thing that would aid in forgetting the grief of your heart and soul. It comforts you as a lover would in your time of need, sings you a lullaby tires out your body and sways you into a deep slumber.

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The potent liquor has my mind dragged into murk my steps turn wobbly within a few minutes for after all just like Phobos's dear friend Moira he rushed to comfort, I had drunk an entire bottle by myself as well. The sensual beats of the drums have me shamelessly stumble towards a male who is of my age, young, wild and free. As soon as he catches me intruding on his personal space he halts chatting with his friend and turns the wholeness of his attention to me his eyes dilating as he unhurriedly skims down my curvy being as though he has never beheld such beauty before.

"Do you know who I am?" I ask and he shakes his head. He does not know I am the Luna for I did not greet him at the gates he must be one of the latecomers.

The male unhesitantly takes a curt step forward towards me showing to me his keen interest, his fascination...his lust. I tilt my head to the side watching him and slowly remove my jacket baring my hands and shoulders to his aroused eyes. "What is your name?"

"Karel." He utters with a smirk and takes another step forward to wrap his arms around my waist and tug me to his body. He hisses when my breasts press against his, brown eyes goggle right into the low neckline of my dress to get a glimpse of my bra-clad voluptuous bosoms.

"I like your name." I stumble my surroundings spinning for the drink is getting to me but he holds me to his chest not allowing me to fall and I steady myself clutching onto his strong veined forearms for support.

"What is yours?" He asks.

"That does not matter. Tell me, Karel do you find me attractive?" I ask peering up at him from beneath my lush lashes. His eyes darken as a robust need consumes him from within setting him aflame.

"Fuck yes. Who wouldn't find you attractive?" His voice is throaty and low whilst his friend who stands to the side whistles lowly looking at Karel as though he is the luckiest male on this earth.

"Then kiss me," I whisper boosting my face to him closing my eyes shut giving him the permission he is desperately seeking after.

"You blessed bastard." His friend chortles from the side taking another swig from his cup.

Karel is prompt with his actions as he tows me closer and smashes his chapped lips against mine and forces his slippery tongue into my mouth.

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