Chapter 45: Drahá - Part【1】

Phobos is unsettled. Throughout breakfast, he was rather reserved not uttering a sole word to me keeping my beloved sight, his stunning ocean blues away from my questioning ones. I could not feed properly for how could I when my male resisted to even spare me a single glance of acknowledgement.
The unfriendly space he shoved between us, I could sense it with a distinction. That barrier that was hastily set by him to prohibit me from nearing his essence I did not like it of course, but I did not complain taking his retreat as a sign of his need to reflect or be isolated in his cave. He did not wish to be disturbed for something was drastically disconcerting him.
It was a foreboding feeling indeed that consumed me from within, a sense that something shall happen. Something which would undoubtedly perturb me, therefore I did not seek to challenge my mate. If Phobos held certain matters he needed to discuss with me he would have done so already. It was possibly a secret I assumed or an issue of some sort that he desired to keep with himself.
My moon blessed seemed to be bound by a disheartening world of his, I did not know how to save him from drowning. Perhaps in the past, he was on his own and required to deal with issues himself but is it not different now that he has me? I would carry the entireness of his burdens for him but the moon has entrusted to me a stubborn, reclusive male who refuses to communicate with me the truth of his feelings.
Well, I suppose I am perched on the same ship as him for I hinder from doing so too for telling him my feelings terrorises me a little. I dread his reactions and his responses, the only thing that has brought us back together seems to be my cuisine. Yet he and I still linger on opposite sides fastened by that loose thread and I do not wish to rip it. We need more time to become closer to take a hold of each other's souls.
Following our supper, he praised me as always clemently nudging his nose onto my cheek pressing me to his chest. Yet his hug felt strange today, and it made me apprehensive. That comfortless feeling which probed in the pit of my belly had me shackled all morning to the point I stood unsteadily fighting to breathe beneath the dome of panic. Why? Why would he act that way with me?
"The males have returned!" Moira voices out from behind me, my cynical thoughts fleeing whilst I quickly whirl around to regard them. It was a short span of time indeed since he left for the sea yet I missed him, I am truly entranced by this male that I cannot seem to even bear a couple of hours without the warmness of his flesh. This feeling of mine is deadly for certainly, it shall prey upon my emotions in the near future.
Phobos had led an assembly of males earlier this morning to go fishing. It once again seemed sudden for he had not notified me, therefore, adding to the several uncanny situations that have occurred today. We females on the other hand were occupied preparing to descale and gut what would be delivered to us. Moira informed me they would fetch substantial amounts for apparently, the males on these lands are remarkably skilled in fishing.
I watch in awe the way he rides on Asger steering the excited horse towards us his face as aloof and emotionless as always. My male mildly kicks his rear a direct command to still as the creature trots in circles coming to a standstill in front of me as if knowing where exactly rather to whom exactly he must transfer his master.
Phobos's globes are instantly on me, discerning my appearance from head to toe. Yet the smile I seek for does not come, only his distant blues calmly watching me. Have I perhaps done him some wrong? Can he not see how upset I am by his indifferent actions?

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"How much were you able to acquire this time?" Moira questions my male peering up at him with a warm smile on her face piercing through our tension-filled contact. How is it that she often finds it so simple to discourse with him whilst I tend to choose and interpret each of his actions laboriously? I am his female, yet why do I find communicating with him to be so strenuous?
"A lot." He answers as I gaze away from his flickering globes that appreciate my bare ankles for the breeze plays with the hem of my dress teasingly covering and revealing my flesh to the greedy beast every few seconds.
His first words of the day are intended for her ears and not mine. He would not speak to me but to her, he does so with ease. We were doing all right together, just like the connection we embraced when we were young. Why is he recklessly creating this distance between us, I do not understand his ways.
"Hello, Asger." I greet his horse patting him in between his orbs, as he neighs and swings his head in answer. He seems to recognize me quite well. I am happy I am the only wolf he allows to touch him other than my male, it makes me feel somewhat superior.
I wait patiently for my moon blessed to call my name for him to demand my attention but instead he calls another female from that mouth of his.
"Moira, come." He beckons her with his bewitching voice whilst unmounting Asger as she briskly nods towards him in affirmation marching ahead towards the parked trucks. He unlocks the rear door exhibiting the copious diverse seafood they caught stored in large buckets.
Too close, they are standing too close. Her shoulder slightly brushes against his but it does not displease him as though he has gotten used to her flesh encountering his. He does not like being touched yet he seems to be all right if she does it. My moon blessed points at the buckets as though he is familiarising her with the names of each fish like one would do with their mate. Like what he must do with me instead.
His beast is astonishingly composed as well as though subdued by her soothing presence, as though he does not mind having that female imminent. How is this possible? What kind of a connection do they hold? Friends, this I know. Moira is a moral female she does not wish to possess him but why does my heart squeeze blisteringly when I mark them together, why cannot I seem to stop doubting them?
Jealousy, possessiveness, suspicion are disastrous things for they wield a certain power greater than others. They can ruin a being slaying both the mind and heart concurrently. My wolf unveils her teeth at her male gnarling seethingly pacing back and forth behind her fence, she loathes what she is seeing.. This she finds to be a revolting scene to behold.

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