Chapter 96: Chapter 96: Nolan the Nobody Part 5

It was a cave clearing with bodies strewn across on the floor.

“Nolan,” Fez said. “I thought I will die as a hero. I thought that maybe I will be banging Sheen and have three babies with her.”

“Shit, don’t talk like that, man.”

“Why did we fall in love with people like them?” Fez asked.

“I don’t know. But at least she accepted you. I was eighteen when I courted Ciara. Look at me, I am going to become thirty, and she still won’t accept me. She talks to me, but never really does out of politeness. I am graying, but at least I am not balding like you.”

“Harsh, but true, fair...say, should you go for another woman?” Fez said.

“Nope, I don’t want to. I want her.”

“Traditions are fine and all, but it’s not like the world would care.”

“I accepted the challenge, and I never back down Fez. You fuckers made me stubborn and loyal, and I hate you all for it.”

“Hah, that’s our weakest, always so loyal, and I’d probably be angry. We wasted so much time helping you, but damn you are such a loser when it comes wooing woman, how the fuck do you spend so much time?”

“Says the guy who had his ass kicked by Sheen, and was dominated like a bitch.”

“But she’s my woman, and you have none. Eat that, weakest.”

“Fuck, I am parsed as fuck, do you have anything?”

“Nope,” Nolan said. “I have run out of it, and I rather not have you drinking.”

“Shit, I wish Ton was here to kick your ass,” Fez said.

“Sir Gil, Ton, and the others...are they fighting out there?”

“Who knows? Sir Gil has reached his prime. Ton...you know what happened to him. No way would he survive a fall with a huge hole in his chest. Crazy bastard, died like a hero, and he really outdid us.”

“Yeah, he was such a bastard, and he had to do it.”

“Let’s not shit on the bastard,” Fez laughed. “He’ll be rolling that his best friends are insulting him. Maybe, he’s a ghost now? Watching on the sidelines like the sneaky shit he is.”

“You there, Ton?” Nolan said.

“Obviously the ghost won’t come, idiot.”

“And if it’s Ton, he’d be snickering, waiting, for us to compliment him.”

“Shit, can you not move you’re back so much?” Fez asked.

“Sorry, still can’t move, man.”

“Fine, shit, why do I have to be stuck with you all the time?”

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“Who knows? You should really punch the past you who took that beer mug from me. You were honestly so disgusting when you said that you wanted to be friends just because of a beer. Shit, can I punch you for that embarrassing scene?”

“Don’t lie, man. You were asking for my friendship, shit, I remember your teary-looking eyes when I said that. Fuck, admit it, you love me, and Ton a lot.”

“Shit, of course, I do, man,” Nolan said. “You are family, and I don’t regret being with you guys.”

“Same, I thought you were annoying, but hell, you are a good friend, man. I love you.”

“Please don’t kiss me, man. You aren’t going to say you suddenly want to kiss me, right?”

“No, but if possible...I would have loved to.”

“Shit, you are creepy, my man,” Nolan said.

“Hah, Nolan, serious question,” Fez said. “What do you think would happen if Sheen answered me faster, and none of this happened?”

“First, you’d be a good father,” Nolan said.

“Whoa, I thought you’d be jesting,” Fez said.

“No,” Nolan shook his head. “Even I can’t lie when you ask so seriously. Heck, I pity Sheen that he’d have to love such loveable bastard like you, since knowing you, you’re going to sire a lot of fucking kids, and then you’d buy a good house, invite me and Ton to drink with you, then Sheen would kick our assess for being annoying pieces of shit. I could see a happy house and a lot of kids chasing after their uncles. I bet Ton would spoil your kids and I would be hiding under foliage’s, scared, because of your damn kids. Your kids would inherit your cheapness, I am sure of that and it would be a miracle if they aren’t.”

“Hah, if my kids are like that, then you better prepare, shit, that’s a good world, a really good world, I like that lot, sounds nice, and peaceful, just family, laughing around, having no care about the damn world. We fight for family, we do things because we want good things for our family. Nolan, you are family, Sir Gil, and Ton was my family, and everyone who fight with us. Everyone can a guardsman of throes, but they will never compare to the hardest sons of bitches, which is us. Sir Mac, Sir Gil, Ton, and obviously the best of them all, me. We complete the guardsman of throes and I say never in a thousand years they would surpass us.”

“For once, I agree with you. Every single one of you is the best. Even though I was some retard. You accepted me. You taught me. And you give me a circle of bastards that were good to me.”

“I’m glad you think that, Nolan,” Fez said.

“Fez?”

“Uh, yeah, if there is another life, and if there is another time...brother, would you be friends with me?” Fez asked.

“It’s stupid that you even have to ask that, Fez.”

“I see. Please don’t forget about me, you’ll regret not remembering someone as handsome as I am.”

“How can I forget someone like you? Your balding head would be impossible to forget. Not to mention that the disgusting face you make when you see Sheen? Nope, never going to forget you, my friend.”

“That’s nice...you really are a weakling, Nolan. I want to hate you for that, I really do. But even all these years, I still can’t...really, did you put drugs on that...beer?”

“Fez?” Nolan turned to look at Fez. He could feel the pool of blood that wetted his bottom. He looked at the cavern ceilings, his eyes staring blankly.

“Sleep well, brother,” Nolan said.

“...”

Nolan left the cave clearing alone.

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