Chapter 1 – The Girl Who Tried to Kill Herself
“See you later, Chinatsu.”
“Bye-bye Nacchan.”
“Yeah! See you tomorrow!”
When the sun had already set and it was dark, there was a boy walking with his back to the pair of man and woman. His name was Honda Chinatsu, and he was just a high school boy you could find anywhere.
“Damn, never tag along on a couple’s date.”
As Chinatsu just mentioned, he was hanging around with his friends earlier. He had originally planned to go home alone, but was invited by the couple.
Of course he refused, but since they always talked so closely at school, that was nothing new. Thus the three of them hung out together, sometimes Chinatsu nearly vomited sugar as he watched them interact.
“Oh well, let’s go home early.”
Chinatsu then proceeded to walk.
Whenever he walked home and felt lonely walking alone, he always thought about getting a girlfriend. But alas, although he had a good number of friends, male and female, he had never been able to have that close a relationship with the opposite s*x. In other words, his age equaled his virginity.
“…I do have someone I’m interested in, though.”
However, it didn’t mean that he wasn’t interested in love, as he was also in love. It was a woman who lived in the room next door to Chinatsu’s flat. She was a beautiful woman who exuded a mature sexiness.
She had long, beautiful black hair and a well-defined face, but what was most impressive was her style. She had a violent charm that would invite men’s lust, and she was so attractive that high school student Chinatsu had a faint feeling for her.
The sweet sound of her voice emanating from her pouty lips and her beautiful sapphire-blue eyes were so beautiful that one would feel like being sucked in.
Living next door, they saw each other and made small talk to a certain extent. But even so, Chinatsu never got close to the woman in question…because she also had a boyfriend.
“You must’ve done a lot of good deeds in your previous life to have such a boyfriend, I envy you!”
Even as a teenager, he had a certain longing for adult women. The gentle way she spoke, and her voluptuous style, were all things that he couldn’t help but follow with his eyes… Anyway, Chinatsu was interested in this woman.
“…No. This makes me even sadder. Let’s just go home.”
Chinatsu couldn’t help but laugh at the fact that she lived next door and yet, he had no chance from the very beginning.
But lately he had been a bit concerned. The woman he sometimes saw looked somewhat pale. It wasn’t that she didn’t look well, it was more like she was mentally trapped.
“I don’t know what’s going on… I barely know her, and I don’t know if I should stick my head in too much. What is her boyfriend doing…?”
I wouldn’t have made her look like that, so Chinatsu thought as he was still a child. With these blurred feelings in his mind, he returned to his flat and was about to go into his room when…
“……?”
Halfway through, he noticed that the door to the room next door, the room where the woman he had a crush on lived, was open. It was already nighttime, and Chinatsu was bothered that she was being careless, so he called out to her.
“Saiki-san, your door is open.”
When he said this in a voice that echoed through the room, there was a loud sound like something falling, accompanied by a surprised voice.
“!!! …Are you okay!?”
It was an unusual sound, so naturally Chinatsu was surprised. At the same time, he had a bad imagination. Was there a burglar in the house? Thinking about it, Chinatsu couldn’t sit still and barged into the room.
“Saiki-san! Is there something…wrong?”
Chinatsu was already prepared to be scolded and hated by her… And as a result of that, when he came into the room, he saw…
“Chinatsu-kun…”
“……”
She, Saiki Madoka, was on her buttocks when the chair fell over. No, it would’ve been okay if that was all there was to it. The problem was the rope hanging from the ceiling… Yes, it was a rope she had prepared to hang herself.
“…What…were you thinking of doing…?”
“……”
Madoka looked down at Chinatsu’s words, who asked her why she did that with incredulity. And the next time she looked up, she said this with tears streaming down her face.
“…I was thinking of killing myself… Ahaha…”
“!?”
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When she told him that she wanted to die, Chinatsu felt as if time had stopped. The words that he did not want to hear the most made even Chinatsu feel sad.
“…Ah, why is Chinatsu-kun crying?”
“Why you ask…?”
Naturally, Chinatsu had never come across someone trying to end their own life. That was why he was confused… And at the same time, Madoka was the person Chinatsu was in love with. Such a woman was about to end her own life, how could he not be sad?
“Because…because I…”
Chinatsu’s emotions were a mess.
Of course he didn’t know what to say. But he was sure that if he didn’t say anything, he would regret it.
“I think of Saiki-san as… an important neighbor. I like the smile that comes to your face when we meet face to face, the calm atmosphere when we talk and…and…and!”
Seeing the frantic Chinatsu, who was unable to think straight, Madoka’s gloomy expression changed and she smiled a little. Even so, the negative feelings in her eyes had yet to disappear, so it seemed that she still had not given up the thought of ending her life.
“…Chinatsu-kun is really kind. If you think like that, surely the person who becomes Chinatsu-kun’s girlfriend will be happy. I envy her so, so much.”
Chinatsu understood that it was not such a noble thing, it was just a selfish attempt to bind her to this world. There must have been a clear reason for her suicide attempt, and yet, he interfered with her attempt to die of her own volition.
But even so, Chinatsu wanted her to live.
Only that, only that, was all Chinatsu wished for.
“…Have you calmed down a little? I’m sorry, Chinatsu-kun, I’ve been such a–“
Madoka stopped for a bit, but then she dropped her phone. The screen had just brightened and Chinatsu could see everything. What was there was an exchange with Madoka’s boyfriend, and Chinatsu saw a series of words denying everything about Madoka, along with a terrible outburst.
“…Could you listen to me for a bit?”
“Of course!”
Chinatsu nodded at the question, a little desperate, but he would rather take action than do nothing and regret it.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
[I really think you’re disgusting.]
[I told you I don’t know. Stop contacting me already, okay? Let’s break up already. I’m tired of you.]
[I’ve hooked up with a nice girl. She’s a much better match for me than you are. I don’t want you anymore, so I’m cutting you off.]
For Madoka, these words easily tore at her heart.
Part of her longing for love led her to date a man she met at university. At first he was kind and Madoka was immediately attracted to him, but it was only recently that his seediness came out.
He would spend a lot of money, didn’t listen when she asked him to stop smoking indoors, and was violent if she would give him the slightest attention. She wondered why he had changed so much.
It was the moment she realized that if you have some familiarity with someone, even a little slander would be hurtful.
More than that, she had never heard such clear malicious statements before, so she didn’t know what to do.
[Madoka, just break up! I’m sure there are a lot of better guys out there!]
Despite being encouraged by the words of friends, the relationship continued somehow.
However, even Madoka was mentally disturbed by such piercing words. In such a state of being undermined by the words and brazen cheating, she was sick and tired of thinking about it.
“……”
She wanted to hang a rope from the ceiling and die, but to be honest, she did not have the courage to do so. It was all just for show. In the end, she was disgusted with herself for not being able to do anything, and just when she thought that she was pathetic, a voice–his voice–called out to her.
“Saiki-san, are you okay?”
“Eh? …KYAAA!”
Surprised, the chair wobbled and Madoka fell to the floor.
Then the person who called out to her, a kind boy who lived in the next room–Chinatsu–appeared in front of her.
Chinatsu appeared and tearfully opened his mouth to speak about his feelings for Madoka.
All of them were very pleasant and seemed to shed light on Madoka’s dark heart… In the first place, she had thought about how things would have been if this boy had been her boyfriend instead of that lousy guy more than once.
As he appeared to protect her nearly crushed heart, Madoka’s heart was pounding at the sight of him.
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