Ch10 - How to Use Human Computers

Mochi came to patrol

Editor: Vez 

Sparta then asked, “Since this thing called the internet can’t be seen or touched, how can we find it?”

Mochi shook his whole furry body with pride, raising his chin he explained to Sparta, “This is due to our great ancestor. He discovered the secret of the internet, pushed the evolution and development of our cat written language, and established a modern school with one paw! His name is Wang—Te—Qu!

 

 

“According to legend, Wang Tequ was a giant black cat with a thick and shiny black coat, and his tail was as white as snow without any trace of impurities. He was known to be a type of needle hidden in the ink cat. What was more amazing was that he had four ears that could eavesdrop on heaven and picked up sounds at the deepest parts of earth and a pair of amber eyes that could see thousands of miles.  

“As a domestic cat, Wang Tequ had successfully solved the problem that had plagued the cat race since the dawn of time—humans—and created the course on The Science Behind Raising a Human as well as written excellent works like The Seven Thousand Days of My Life Spent with My Human, all very beneficial for our future generations. He was proficient in the research of human society,  making use of his studies to establish the cat education system, improved the cat written language, made the spread of cat culture possible and creatively adopted the new area of internet classroom in which ‘all cats can be educated’ through human scientific and technological means. 

 

“He is also the first and only Chinese cat who got a doctoral degree in nearly half a century. In order to commemorate Wang Tequ’s outstanding contribution, the Cat Education Association had set up the Meow Meow Meow Award for Lifetime Achievement Award to encourage and honour all the cat scholars who share same vision, ambition and abilities as Wang Tequ.”

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

Sparta gawked as his tongue hung out unconsciously, looking extremely stupidly cute. “A doctoral degree, that must be amazing.”

Zbmtl ilmxfv tlr qjk. “Rjaegjiis. Cr ojg jr P xcbk, cb mja tjr jmtlfnfv remt jc jmtlfnfwfca joafg Qjcu Kfde.”

 

Qjcu Kfde kjr gfjiis j vlnlcf mja. Lf kjr atf olgra mja ab ajxf cbalmf bo atf lcafgcfa, bcf rafq fjgilfg atjc wbra tewjc yflcur. Lf vlrmbnfgfv atf gfijalbcrtlq yfakffc mbwqeafgr jcv atf lcafgcfa jcv mgfjalnfis vfnfibqfv j rfa bo lcafgcfa geifr relajyif obg mjar. Cmmbgvlcu ab Zbmtl’r vfrmglqalbc, j mbwqeafg lr j obeg-vlwfcrlbcji bypfma atja mjc fwla iluta, jcv wbra mlas tberftbivr rffw ab tjnf bcf. Lewjcr jgf mgjhs bnfg atlr atlcu. Zbmtl erfv tlr ogbca qjk ab nlrejiis fzqijlc. Vqjgaj gjmxfv tlr ygjlc jcv olcjiis mbccfmafv Zbmtl’r vfrmglqalbcr klat atf rqfmlolm bypfma. 

“To master the mysteries surrounding the internet, you need to connect with computers. Computer is just a general term. Tablets or phones work as well.”

A large amount of fresh and obscure words were poured over the confused Sparta who sat there with his head tilted. A two year old cat was considered already too old to be starting their education. 

 

“It is very easy to get in contact with the computer, just move with your paw, but you can’t move blindly. We need to remember the essentials. This is the same as catching a mouse, it requires skill and a lot of practice.” 

When mice catching was mentioned, Sparta was clear headed in an instant. He was the best at catching mice. Meow! He swished his tail through the grass twice, expressing his determination. 

“Very good, you are halfway to success with this attitude. I will tell you all the tricks, so you can start practising once you are back home. I will not keep you in the dark about it and it is very difficult to succeed.” Mochi stared intensely into Sparta’s eyes as he meowed an octave lower, “In fact, a large percentage of adult cats fall at this step when they start. If you cannot complete this task, you cannot proceed to the later learning plan. Usually, it takes two to three weeks for cats to familiarise  themselves with this process, but I can only spare you a week. Because after one week is when Jiang Dabao, the most famous lecturer in cat education, will start his class. I managed to squeeze you into the roster so you better give me your all!”

Mochi was full of enthusiasm and dignity. The residents nearby probably must have thought of it as a cat in its estrus cycle. Under such strong expectations, Sparta was embarrassed to reveal his lack of confidence, so he had to hold his head up and meow out a few responses. 

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Before leaving, Mochi suddenly remembered something and asked Sparta, “By the way, what is your name? I don’t remember you telling me last time.” 

“My mother called me A-Li.” Sparta replied honestly. 

“Did your human not give you a name?”

“I do feel that my human has been calling me using the same tone every time. Maybe that is the name he gave me?” Speaking of this, Sparta was feeling sad again. He could not understand what Miwu was saying. He assumed responsibility over this human but could not take care of the human’s emotional and physical needs. What a failure of a cat. 

Mochi patted Sparta on the arm and comforted, “Don’t feel down. After you go to school, you will soon understand human language. I will call you Xiao Lihua for now. Tell me your name once you learn of it.” After bidding goodbye to the Dragon Li cat, Mochi calmly trotted back the way he had come.   

Sparta immediately felt better after receiving such encouragement. That was right, although he was still a country cat who knew nothing about this divine cat, he was not afraid of hard work. He will study hard, and one day, he will understand Miwu and become a good cat! He unknowingly smiled at the thought of Miwu. Mochi said that Miwu did not abandon him, and he knew how knowledgeable the other cat was and would not lie to him. Since Miwu did not abandon him, he could go back home soon.

If Miwu wants me to take a bath, then fine, I will take this thing called bath. As a responsible cat, I will try my best to meet my human’s requests, even if that means getting my fur wet and uncomfortable. Oh, my fur…At the thought of his fur, Sparta instinctively licked the fur on his back. Of course, only Miwu could wash him, he did not like those rude humans at all. 

 

But after he cleaned his entire body, Miwu was still nowhere to be seen. Sparta could not stop feeling anxious. He circled twice, anxiously chased his tail, once he had it between his mouth, he stopped and sniffed deeply. There was no trace of Miwu’s scent. 

Bored to death, Sparta lay on his stomach under a blooming osmanthus tree. Small golden petals fell with the wind and stuck to his head, back, and the gap between his paws. Meow, it smells good. He licked his paws and began to remiscene his life in Quliu Town. During that time, he was a carefree cat without worries and very content with his ways. Now, he had this inheritance and assumed responsibility over this nice human, his cat heart suddenly became greedy. He did not want Miwu to give him away to another human, he did not like Miwu leaving his sight, he wanted to live together with Miwu in the house he had slowly become familiar with. Miwu would gently caress him, feed him food, and hold him firmly at times when he misses his mother.  

Sparta meowed towards the sky and suddenly remembered his little bundle wrapped in cloth. At ordinary times, Miwu would not let him go out. Now it  was the perfect time to grab it. He had stuffed all of his treasures inside. He had prepared them as a gift to Miwu. 

Meow—Sparta stretched his body before dashing towards the depths of the flower bed. 

After searching around the pet beauty salon twice, Xin Qin came up empty handed and in an even worse mood. Most frightened cats that escaped would not go too far if they were in an unfamiliar environment. As long as the owner could find them in time, there was still hope. But with the passage of time, this warm hope slowly turned cold in Xin Qin’s heart. Like a walking corpse, he walked inattentively back home with a heavy heart. 

He thought of the Dragon Li cat as well as himself.  

Under this careful thought, he realised that he had known Sparta for only three days. He picked up a wounded cat and took him to get treatment. In the vast sea of people, everything has a distinct spiritual essence, and their fate started so shallow. But Xin Qin had been filled with joy. For the first time in his two decades of life, he was responsible for another life. Before that, no one had ever counted on him. No one had ever looked at him like that Dragon Li cat. Looking at him, only him. He had even planned a series of life goals, and was determined to work hard to bring a better life to Sparta. He did not want to live by going through the motions. He did not want to stay lonely forever, spending his last years as a disappointment. He knew what he did not like, yet he could not find what he should like or should do. The Dragon Li cat to him was like a faint light that had let him see himself in the fog.

However, light always dissipates and darkness always returns. 

Others are perpetually in a hustle. There are endless roads and countless appointments waiting in the world. That is how their lives go about. If one of them was to be stopped at this moment to lister to  him pour out his worries, he would most likely get questioned and ridiculed in return. In this world, how could a human be anything less important than a stray cat? A cat? Nothing but an animal. They didn’t understand people’s emotions and hardships, and they didn’t even know of repaying their owner’s worries. 

During Xin Qin’s moment of wild thoughts, he had unknowingly returned to his neighbourhood. When he passed the osmanthus tree with golden flowers just outside of the building, he suddenly smelled a strong fragrance, and then a weak call broke his train of thought. He lowered his head to see his Dragon Li cat sitting upright under the blooming osmanthus tree. He was sitting attentively, four paws gathered together and a small bundle in strawberry patterned cloth perfectly fit around his neck. He held his head up and stuck his flurry chest out, and the corners of his lips rose slightly, as if he was smiling at Xin Qin.  

Miwu. 

To lose something and then regain it, it was as simple as that.

 

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