Chapter 40: 39: A Healthy Diet

You spend a couple of minutes summarizing to Pythia what has transpired after you entered the catacombs. How you bravely rescued prisoners from the evil bandits, how you fought together with Ariadne against the bandit leader and his henchmen. You describe how Xi conjured flames around him and Ariadne to escape in an unknown direction—possibly the capital, but, for all you know, it could also be the nearby forest. You also tell how—after witnessing the horrific deeds of the bunny man and recognizing your great strength—you’ve managed to convince over a dozen bandits to join your side. You make sure to never mention your relation to Ariadne.

Pythia listens to you patiently, though she frowns when she hears that Xi got away. When you’re done talking, she finally asks, “So he got away?”

You really hate her attitude by now. Since when am I some lackey reporting to you? Feeling foolish for even bothering explaining this to her, you simply ask, “What do you want?”

“Hm,” She pauses and measures you up. Then she smiles and says, “I have been traveling for quite a while looking for… interesting people. Someone like that minotaur girl’s father but not a disappointment.”

How full of herself is she? You wonder, but try to speak as politely as possible, “That doesn’t really answer the question of what you really want.”

“True, true, haha! You’re so perceptive!” she laughs with closed eyes and waves her wing in a gesture that’s meant to say ‘oh you!’.

You can’t help but feel that she’s making fun of you and you are seriously considering whether to kill her outright or teach her a lesson first.

“Well?” you push out a single word, nearly grinding your teeth as you do it.

“Watch your tone!” Twinkle says loudly at you.

“Don’t test my patience, you little furball!” you snap back at the bird and he covers his head.

“Oh, easy, tiger, easy!” Pythia laughs. “We mean no offense! Just having some fun. Learn to relax and enjoy yourself.”

“I can enjoy myself in many ways,” you say to the bird-monster in a thinly-vailed threat.

“Oh, so do I,” Pythia smiles and her left eye sparkles for a split second. “Tell me, do you enjoy eating the same thing over and over again?”

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“Eh?” You’re caught off guard by such a question, but quickly regain yourself and give a straight answer. “No, obviously, not. Everyone enjoys variety. It’s what makes for a healthy diet.”

“I know, right!” Pythia exclaims and leans toward you with way more excitement than is warranted. “I’m the same! I like to eat different things too! Humans, bunnies, elves, lizard-men—of those have a special flavor to them that I love! But I can’t stand eating the same thing! And I want to try out every living being in existence! Do you know how rare some have become?”

 “… No, I do no—”

“Very very rare! Nearly extinct! And if they’re going to die out either way, I might as well be the one to finish them off, as long as I get a bite! They have to be alive, of course! I’m not into cold corpses! That’s for those vultures! We don’t like those!”

“I see,” you say when Pythia seems to have calmed down and is not likely to interrupt you again. “I suspect some rare ‘creatures’ are not easy to get to?”

“Oh, yes!” Pythia nods with a comically serious face. “It was fun with Graf Wilhelm! In all my life I’ve never had a more varied diet. But, unfortunately, he got absolutely savaged in quite a spectacular fashion before we reached some of the rarities.”

“How unfortunate!” you cross your arms and adjust your pose with a smirk. Assuming the damn bird is serious this time, you finally have some grasp on what she wants.

Make her a willing ally? She does have a command over an impressive—though simple-minded—force, which you could find too many uses for to pass on. You were considering temporarily abandoning the fortress in order to not split your forces too thin. But keeping it would much more preferable! Considering how much time and energy you wasted clearing out the fortress, it would be a waste to let some asshole to just walk in and claim it without a fight.

Though you yourself have to return to your base anyway, and the sooner the better. Before the damn bunnies starve to death, or worse!

But can you risk resting together with the troglodytes? Going out in the night, already tired seems like a bad idea, but it is more preferable compared to being attacked while you sleep.

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