Chapter 10: Good Help is Hard to Find

Blue hair snorted. “Well, looks like we get to do this the fun way then.”

“Lady Via…” I could practically hear Rel trembling behind me. “W-what—”

“Why don’t you go back to the warehouse.” I shook out my hands as the men drew their weapons. “It appears negotiations have broken down.”

Blue jerked his head. “Kill her.”

My hand snapped up, focusing on that feeling of mana as I channeled my new skill. “Demon-itize!”

A crackling bold of black leapt from my hands as I felt my MP take a precipitous dip. Blue hair’s eyes widened as he threw himself to the ground. My skill raced over his head, splashing harmlessly against a building on the far side of the road.

I bit back a curse as Blue sprang back to his feet.

“Don’t just stand there, you imbeciles! Get her!”

Dee and Dum shared another glance, before turning back towards me.

I growled. “Demon-itize!” Another black bolt leapt from my fingers, Blue swore explosively as he ducked.

This time, it left a discolored streak through his hair—mind the spikes, gents. He howled as he saw a strip of it fall out to the ground. “I’ll get you for that! Bitch!”

“Why don’t you come and make me?”

Dee and Dum charged.

I turned, sprinting after Rel into the collapsed building. My MP was over two thirds depleted now. Whatever my new skill actually did, it was clear I couldn’t just go throwing bolts around like party favors. I bit back a hiss as I saw my MP bar tick up slowly in the corner of my vision.

Wasn’t this what… Int or Wis was supposed to help with? Why did this stupid system have to use stupid nonstandard stats as well!

I sprinted through the broken doorway of the warehouse, ducking as a piece of metal cut through the air above my head. “Not me! Hit them!”

“Ah!” Rel jumped, voice going high pitched in surprise. “Sorry.”

I snatched the rusted sword from his hands. “And if you’re going to use it, hit them with the other side!” I shoved it back into his hands by the rusted sheath. And he blinked up at the pommel for a moment before the sound of footsteps jerked him out of his stupor.

I need to summon another one of those demons!

There was a moment’s pause as I cast out with my skill.

Then. “Hmmm?” The voice sounded bored, “What was that?”

I raced deeper into the warehouse. “Computer, activate self-defense protocols! Assign all new encounters, Designation: Adversary!”

My spider bot beeped once as it came online again, interrupting whatever diagnostic process it was undergoing. It skittered into the shadows.

Another one of those demons from two days ago, same deal!

Dum ran through the doorway, only to get clocked in the head by the hilt of Rel’s ‘sword.’ The man staggered backwards, clutching at his face.

Unfortunately, while it drew blood, Rel didn’t exactly have the best upper body strength. The big man didn’t go down and managed to block the second swing with his own club.

“Well.” The voice clicked it’s tongue. I paused; did it even have a tongue? “Normally, I’d say that based on your previous actions I can’t find anyone willing to take your contract…”

I glared, raising my hand as Dee and Dum forced their way through the door, Rel stumbling back in shock.

“Buuuuut hobblefiends are too dumb to think about any of that stuff.”

Great. My eyes narrowed. Then get me the same kind of demon I summoned yesterday, for the same deal.

I felt more than heard the smirk in his voice. “Coming right up! Oh, and they are actually called hobblefiends.”

I pushed the rest of my mana into the summoning circle forming in front of me. It expanded, growing big enough for another one of those red imps to fall out of the air with a chittering screech.

As one, every occupant of the warehouse froze.

“Demon!” Dee (or was that one Dum?) shouted.

“Get the big ones!”

The hobblefiend gibbered gleefully at my command, dashing forward on its lumpy arms and legs. It leapt over Dum’s first swing and sank his claws deep into his leather jerkin.

I grinned as the man screamed in alarm, jerking around in a panic until he tripped and hit the ground with a massive thud.

Right on top of my demon.

The creature gave a piteous cry as it was smushed beneath his immense bulk. A single visible arm flailed, three fingered hand clawing at the air, before it stiffened and vanished.

I blinked. Come to think of it… I had killed it with a single stab the other day.

“D-did it die?” Dum pushed himself to his hands and knees.

Dee tilted his head. “I think you got—”

Rel slammed his sword into the back of Dee’s head. The man collapsed with a dull moan.

Rel blinked. “I… did it?”

Dee roared, turning and swinging at my minion. Rel meeped, holding up the sword in front of him, for all the good it did. Dee still practically tossed him across the room into a pile of bricks. Then the man turned towards me.

He slapped his crude club against a meaty palm. “Gonna have fun with you.”

I laughed. “Try it and I’ll rip your balls off.”

I raised a hand, and he flinched back. “So why do you take your friend and get out of here, before I have to get serious.”

For a second, it almost looked like he’d go for it, then Blue shoved his way into the warehouse. “She’s obviously out of mana! Get her already!”

I clicked my tongue. Everything was so much easier when my enemies were idiots who overestimated me. It was the main reason I did so well against heroes.

I leapt back as Dee charged, running behind a collapsed pillar.

I didn’t have any weapons; they were all integrated into my armor, which, for those of you who weren’t paying attention, I’d stashed back in the cove on the other side of the damn island.

“Get back here!”

“No, you!”

I ducked beneath some crumbling masonry, a club crashing through it a moment later. One of the walls half collapsed behind me, taking a chunk of the roof with it. I staggered out, coughing. My instincts screamed at me.

I ducked.

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Dee’s club ripped through the air right above my head. I could feel the wind from the strike. Given that the oaf outmassed me by a factor of two, if his hit had connected it probably would have taken my head off.

But there were advantages to being so small.

I rabbit punched him in the junk.

Dee howled, staggering backwards.

I rolled to the side as his club hit the ground, nabbing it as I jumped to my feet. Choking up on the haft of the club, I reared back and put my best golf swing right up between his legs. He let out an agonized wheeze, the ultimate expression of agony, and toppled like ten-foot oak.

I grinned. And here mama always said schmoozing with execs at Aegis Corp was a waste of time.

I mean, she was right, but I had learned my way around a club.

“Blade Flurry!”

I jerked back, holding my club up in front of me like a shield, just in time for blue hair’s rapier to cut it to pieces. I staggered backwards as a line of fire cut into my cheek.

Blue grinned at me, showing off his nasty teeth again. “Got you.” He flicked his rapier, sending a line of my blood across the floor of the warehouse. The blade glinted in the dusky light of the warehouse. And here I was without weapons.

Blue took a step to the right, circling me. I moved back, eyes casting around the warehouse frantically, looking for something I could use to turn the fight back in my favor.

My stupid little spider bot hadn’t made an appearance either. Its combat protocols were probably half corrupted from the salt water. I was of half a mind to just turn and run, but… my eyes glanced over towards Rel. That would mean leaving him here, at the mercy of this little gang.

And that tasted even worse than defeat.

I came to a stop, flipping the remains of the club over in my hand.

Blue grinned. “Finally decided to stop running away?”

I swallowed. Had to get him talking for just a moment longer. “Maybe I’ve decided I want to just beat your face in and get it over with.”

He chuckled, twirling his sword, pansy ass. “Oh, you’ll have a hard time with that. Get her.”

I blinked, eyes widening. There was a roar behind me, and I spun—

Only for Dum to catch my arm in his massive hand. I swore, pulling away, but the man pulled me into a bear hug and lifted me off my feet.

“What’s your skull fucking made of?” I kicked at the air. “Titanium?”

Blue laughed again, walking closer. “Oh, you’ll have a long time to learn about skull fucking when I’m done with you.”

“Really?” I glared at him. “That’s your best material? Fucking hell, and here I was starting to think you were half competent.”

Blue glared. “Beat the shit outta you well enough.”

“Oh, look at the big strong criminal!” I simpered. “It took him two whole thugs and himself to take out a woman and a little boy! I’m so scared!”

“I’ll show you scared you little cunt—”

Then my spider dropped from the ceiling onto Dum’s titanium skull.

He screamed, grip loosening. “Get it off! Get it off!”

I jerked my arm free, grabbing onto Blue’s jerkin.

“Demon-itize!”

This time the oily black bolt sank right into his chest. He gasped, staggering backwards, hands flying to his… undamaged shirt.

Blue let out a laugh. “Well, that wasn’t so—”

His left arm exploded. He screamed.

I blinked.

Well… it hadn’t really exploded, now that I took a second glance. Instead his pink human skin had more sort of… popped like a balloon to make room for a new scaled arm with massive talons.

He caught the scaled with his other hand, arm straining to hold back the new demonic appendage.

“Wh-what did you do to me?!”

I tilted my head. “You know, now that I think about it, the name Demon-itize is actually pretty obvious once you get past the pun.”

He blinked stupidly at me.

Then the rest of him popped too.

I took a step back to dodge the blood splatter.

Left in his place was a hunched over lizard-like thing, with dark green scales and a scrunched-up face. There were two extra arms coming out from the middle of its chest—kind of like a T-rex—and a short mane of blue hair in… homage perhaps, to the man who’d spawned it.

I felt a connection spring into place between myself and the demon the moment we made eye contact. But, unlike the hobblefiend or the little jellyfish demons I’d summoned before, this creature felt more like an extension of myself than a living, thinking creature. I narrowed my eyes, willing it to move to my side.

It bounded forward, claws carving divots into the dirt floor.

I jerked back, shrieking.

Then it landed next to me, sitting down and staring at me. Almost like a cat asking why the human was being so stupid—it did what I wanted it to, didn’t it?

Maybe I was just projecting…

With a shake of my head, I turned to face the other two thugs. Dum was cowering in the corner as my spider bot menaced it with its forelimbs, and Dee was still lying on the ground, moaning softly as he cradled his jewels.

No, he was sobbing.

I sighed, walking over to Rel. He looked at me with his large eyes, blinking slowly as I pulled him to his feet. I gave him a nod. “You did well.”

He blushed slightly, glancing to the side with a shrug.

Then I tuned to face my newest… acquisitions. “Now then.” I crossed my arms. “I trust there will be no further problems?”

Both men nodded violently.

It was a start.

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