A very thin line spreads between sanity and the side we don’t want anyone to see. There are times when we go through things that aren’t easy to convey to others. With such dreadful memories, just how eroded does our mind become, and just how much does it sink into the ground? Sometimes we’re able to regain ourselves to the best of it, to find hope once more, to be able to give life a second chance. We thrive, survive, persist, yet rarely achieve our dreams.
There was this one man who had absolute faith in his deity. But despite such an outstanding belief, when life threw his body into a pool of quicksand, he couldn’t help himself but suffocate slowly and painfully, eventually disregarding everything else. All he needed then was a bit of despair, to shake him enough to take a step through the string one mustn’t go through. To this, he came to a realization: Life is painful and exhausting. The world is condemned. But still, we find hope to keep on with our own feet.
If we go at it objectively, then how much can we endure till there’s no more reasoning left inside of us to keep living?
And how troublesome would it be if we were in the poor girl’s shoes?
Slowly, let us unveil the answer.
After a long silence, my eyes opened.
“Hey! Hey! Hey! Don’t kill me! Please!” Loud words escaped my mouth as the darkened sword almost finished me off.
“Sorry...” He retrieved the weapon from my sight, placing it inside the sheath.
I coughed twice; shrugging the snow that had accumulated on top of my shoulders and hair.
‘It took me longer this time,’ my memories compared both meetings with Keru. In the first one that I remembered, my eyes had seen him appear out of nowhere and coming closer, but now it felt like something had changed.
He turned his back to me, lowering himself for me to climb.
“Let’s get out of this place before the blizzard catches up to us.”
“Yes!” I eagerly got hold of him, placing my arms on his familiar neck, embracing him with respect, and my tail cheerfully shook.
“So... uh... what were you...”
Noticing his struggle, I added similar words from back then, “I’m Yuki, and I lost myself in these woods, eventually growing too weak to continue.”
I wasn’t aware of the reason I was there, despite absorbing the previous soul this body contained. There hadn’t yet been a surge of her memories, but at least a few hints remained.
“You’re Yuki, uh?” He chuckled, finding it peculiar.
“Is my name funny?” I turned my face slightly to his, hitting my left cheek on his right ear softly.
He laughed, “hey now don’t tickle me, I’m trying to walk here.”
“I’m sorry,” I distanced myself a bit.
“It’s alright. And, it’s not that your name is funny, it just has a familiar ring to it,” a sigh escaped through his lips, showing some sort of mist flowing through the air.
I mumbled a sound in accordance with his answer, feeling my body gradually getting tired. Once again inside of me, there was a seed about to sprout, unknowingly to the two of us from the name he naively gave me.
“I need to rest... but please... take care... of me...”
A while later, a sensation passed through my body as I felt myself shaking, hearing a familiar manly voice.
“Wake up Yuki. Hey girl, wake up!”
My hands tenderly rubbed my eyelids before opening them. In front of us, similar to the last time, we arrived at the mansion gates, where a guard stood watch on each side.
“It’s been a long while, Keru,” the man on the right waved at us, wielding a broad grin.
“You’re sure right about that,” his expression matched the guard, looking up at the dusk.
“Here to see the master?” The other one questioned with a serious gaze, keeping his composure at all times.
“Yes. Is lord Astal home?”
“He returned a few days ago from a meeting with her highness,” both of them pushed the gate doors, walking us to the mansion entrance through the greenery. With some hours’ distance from the white plains, this territory was a bit warmer, enough to retain its grass intact and lucky enough to avoid snow falling. A powerful kingdom ruled by a queen regnant who held all the power. Thus, her word was the rightful and only supreme law.
“Speaking of which, how’s milady doing?”
At my savior’s question, they looked into one another with eyes full of pity, shaking their heads to the sides in silence.
“If only I could awaken it...” he mumbled with sympathy, gripping his hand from feeling powerless.
From the last time I was here, I got to know that Astal’s wife Selena was a very sickly woman and that the eldest child of theirs, Theresa, was out there in this nameless world looking for a cure to save her.
‘I wonder what Keru meant by that...’ My puzzled mind attempted its best to keep track of information. After dying a few times, every hint could potentially turn out to be helpful, or so I hoped.
The friendly guard stole a glimpse in my way, “you found a girlfriend?” The man chuckled, causing me to lower my gaze, twitching my ears, embarrassed.
“Yuki’s a kid I rescued from some snowy plains to the west.”
At those words, I smiled faintly, appreciating his gesture.
“Plus, she’s too young,” the three of them laughed, causing me to feel bullied, in a good way.
“How’s the famous sword going?”
To my surprise, the bells rang as if the weapon had decided to give a sign of its own well-being. It was to think that through moving that the chimes would make noises all the time, but truth be told, such was not the case. Almost like they had a mind of their own, they decided when to do it, and from what I understood so far, always when its owner was in some sort of danger.
“Quite sturdy as far as I can tell and a tad more chattery than the last time I dropped by.”
“Sounds like you’re making some progress.”
“Yeah, you could say that.”
I pulled Keru’s left sleeve softly, grabbing his attention.
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“What’s wrong, kid?” He halted with a concerned look.
At that I pointed my right-hand index finger at his scabbard, “does it really talk to you?”
“Yes, but through the mind. I’m not sure how to explain it...” To his doubts, the chimes rang, causing him to add some extra words, “telepathy it says, something like using our thoughts to convey messages to one another.”
“That’s awesome!” My eyes gleamed merrily at it.
He gripped the pommel with a smile, “it was one of her gifts.”
With a completely different conversation than last time, whereas I remained mostly quiet, questions and answers flowed through, inciting my curiosity to spike every time.
As I was about to ask for more, the guard spoke, “lord Astal, guests have arrived.”
I stared at the long silver hair of a man whose back felt sturdy and reliable, whose attention was currently directed to Sofia, a beautiful young lady, one year older than me.
At her sight, my memories and emotions riled up, causing my body to shiver, and her to take notice. She ran inside of the house, leaving Astal to direct his gaze at my savior.
“Oh?” He crossed his arms with a smirk, “look who we got here!”
“It’s been a while sir,” Keru took a few steps forth, exchanging a greeting with him. I saw that it was different from a normal handshake, to be exact. They grabbed each other’s forearms.
“Indeed,” his gaze quickly fell on the guards, “go take a break, you two.”
“Yes, sir!” They replied in unison, heading inside the mansion.
“So, how did it go?”
“It was quite rough. A war between two clans broke out.”
“Oh?” His eyebrow raised.
“The wolf and the fox kin...” Keru directed his gaze at me, causing Astal to follow in the same manner.
From the door Sofia went through, walking close to me with a towel in her hands.
“A survivor, eh?”
“Yes. I found her in the middle of the battlefield,” with a lower tone filled with pity Keru went on, “an unfortunate soul.”
“And now you want us to take care of her?” The fancy-clothed man crossed his arms, displeased.
“Just till I’m back to retrieve her,” Keru shrugged, as she carefully used the yellow towel to dry my ears and hair.
“Kid. How old are you?”
Remembering the fierce and eerie outcome of last time, I lifted the towel off my eyes and looked at him seriously, “I’m fifteen, my lord.”
It came with a shock as he didn’t expect my mannerism, causing his eyebrows to furrow.
“To think...” his voice halted, possibly pondering on what he wanted to convey next.
Yet, before he could, I took a step further in his direction, wielding determined eyes, allowing my hair and ears to free themselves from the soft sensation.
“Please take good care of me, lord Astal.”
He replaced his displeased expression with a confused one as he returned his look to Keru, who was unexpectedly grinning at my words.
“This brat has guts,” his tongue scolded me, ending up in a smirk.
At that Keru laughed, “indeed. Who would have guessed?”
Our eyes followed the peculiar sound of the golden chimes.
“Hum... that might not be a bad idea,” he looked back at Astal with a grin, and before he could talk, words escaped the man’s mouth.
“Kid, follow me.”
Sofia shouted nervously at her father, “my lord, you don’t mean!?”
He glared at her, causing her to shake and grow silent.
‘Uh?’ In my mind, I felt confused at the way she addressed him, but as much as I wished to take her side, there was nothing an outsider like me could add. Thus, for better or worse, I followed him, finding myself inside a smaller house, a training building similar to the dojos from my past world.
At first glance, it looked like a small house, or I swore to myself it did, as I could see there was nothing more, but my senses couldn’t partake of the strangeness I felt from being inside it. After all, across the room, in the complete direction from the entrance where we went through, there was a door. And despite me not being a genius, I knew that the dimension of the building couldn’t possibly have such a thing. Thus, it could only be a different entrance or an exit. I wanted to think that, if it wasn’t for the entry we went in being made of simple wood, and yet, the one that laid before my eyes, was grand, a silver gate with two doors and symbols imprinted in them, whose meaning I couldn’t perceive.
“Beyond that lays the king’s trial.”
“What’s that?”
“An extremely arduous challenge for men and women to thrive themselves, and the survivor becomes the next ruler of this kingdom.”
He walked halfway, halting near a long table where weapons remained on top.
'That sounds amazing, I wonder what kind of place it is...'
Realizing I was behind, his eyes glanced at me, “what are you waiting for?”
“Ah, yes!”
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