Chapter 49: Volume 2 - CH 8.2

I was in front of the room as usual. A room in an apartment. I rang the chime as usual. But my state of mind was different from usual.

The outside light was illuminating the darkness. Silence surrounds the area. I told her that I was going to visit her today. It was a special day, just like any other.

The person I am looking for comes out right away, as if she has been waiting for me. She waits for me with a familiar smile on her face, smiling and smiling kindly, just as she always does.

But today is different from usual, the beginning of a human being named Yukito Kokonoe

It all started here, in this apartment, where I am now.

“Yuki-chan. I’ve been waiting for you! Come on in. Let’s get some sushi.”

“It’s been a while. But first, may I have a word with you?”

“What’s wrong?”

“You’re the one who did this to me, aren’t you, Sekka?”

“Yuki-chan, Have you finally noticed?!”

Pupils widen. Her expression is a mixture of surprise. Joy and loneliness.

It’s like a complicated mixture of opposite emotions. That’s what it looked like to me.

Sekka Kokonoe. She is my mother’s younger sister, and to me, she is another mother. Sekka-san spoils me a lot.

It was after I ran away from home that I began to have serious contact with Sekka-san.

After being pushed away by my sister and not returning home, I kept walking in the opposite direction from home. The urge to disappear was the only thing that drove me.

I found myself in police custody. I vaguely remember my mother and sister crying in front of me.

I was hospitalized with a broken bone.

On the day I was discharged from the hospital, Mom and Sekka were fighting a lot at home. However, it was mostly Sekka who was blaming her, and Mom was in a state where she could not say anything.

In a fit of rage, Sekka said, “If you can’t raise him, I’ll do it myself!” All I could do was to watch in a state of stunned silence.

I remember one thing. At that time, I wanted my mother to deny it. No matter how much I said that Sekka-san was my mother’s sister, she was not my mother.

I wanted her to argue that she wouldn’t let that happen. I wanted her to protect me.

But my mother couldn’t say anything because of Sekka-san’s argument, so Sekka-san took me in and I lived with her for a month.

The look in my mother’s eyes when we parted ways. At that time, did my mother feel relieved that the troublesome me was gone and think, why did he come back? Would she have wished for me to disappear then and there? Such emotions kept swelling inside me.

Rejected by my sister and abandoned by my mother, I have no value in existence.

I must disappear. Sekka saved me from such a situation.

“Yuki-chan, did you really notice? To my hint.”

“Yes. I noticed it when I was looking at the album. I lost my emotions when I came here.”

I questioned my thoughts. Some kind of limitation on my thoughts.

I don’t need to know the details of what they are. There is only one person who can do that for me. Sekka is the only one who could have inspired me to become the Yukito Kokonoe I am today.

Sekka majored in psychology at university. She often talked about it with me.

If that is the case, then she knows everything. She never lies to me.

I was confident that if I asked her, she would definitely tell me.

“Why …… why did you do that?”

“Do you remember when we went to Skytree together?”

I knew it. That day, that’s why Sekka was–.

“Right after I was taken in by Sekka-san, right?”

Yes, that’s right. I saw Yuki-chan at that time and thought, If I don’t do something, Yuki-chan will give up his life again. I was sure you would try to disappear again.”

“I don’t think that was wrong.”

“I was scared. I was scared that Yuki-chan was going to disappear again. That time, Yuki-chan just happened to be lucky and survived. If it happens again, I might not make it in time next time.”

“Did you twist my thoughts with that?”

“No. What I did was not that big a deal. I just cast a little spell on Yuki-chan.”

“A spell?”

Sekka-san laughs to herself. In the living room, I just repeat words as if trying to figure out the answer to everything she has said so far.

“Yuki-chan had a weak sense of self. You thought your own existence didn’t matter. So first, I guided you to strongly recognize yourself as Yukito Kokonoe. I intended to make it so that I could reset before it became unbearable when you heart overflowed.”

Hearing this, a question was cleared up in my mind. I had been repeating to myself that I was Yukito Kokonoe, but had it all been because of Sekka-san?

“But the truth is, you should have been able to figure that out in no time at all.”

The tone of Sekka’s voice dropped a notch.

“My sister loves Yuki-chan too, and Yuuri-chan does too. So if that love could be conveyed to Yuki-chan, it should have been a simple spell that could be solved easily. It wasn’t supposed to be something serious or professional, just a really simple spell. But…”

“?”

“Yuki-chan had bad luck with women in general. After that, things kept happening to you that were meant to hurt you. The time in junior high school was terrible. Each time, the spell I cast on Yuki-chan became stronger and stronger.”

“Is that why my mentality is the strongest?”

Ah, I had it all wrong. It’s not that I don’t get hurt because my mind is the strongest. It’s that I don’t get hurt, because I’m broken. Not getting hurt and breaking were a trade-off.

The strongest mental fortitude, that was the cause of my insanity.

But if I didn’t have it, I probably would have given up on life at some point.

“Yuki won’t get hurt. But you know, every time you do, little by little, Yuki-chan breaks down. By that time, there was nothing I could do about it.”

“Why didn’t you tell Mom or Sis?”

“I can’t stand the two of them always being so close to you, Yuki. The sight of Yuki being broken is unbearable.”

“Then Sekka-san–“

Sekka-san was crying. She is my Mom’s younger sister, and she has a trace of my Mom in some way.

I made her cry again. I didn’t want to make anyone cry anymore.

Why do I always, always—-

She hugged me. Just like Mom. But the smell was a little different than my mother.

Thinking back, I was always hugged like this by Sekka-san.

I know now that Sekka-san must have been pampering me in her own way, since I could not be pampered by my mother.

“So you finally realized that you are loved. I don’t want you to disappear. Yuki-chan is loved by everyone. Everyone thinks so.”

“Yes. Maybe …… I’ll make you sad if I do that, I guess.”

“I’m sorry …… for giving you such a hard time. …… I’m sorry!”

Sekka was crying as if to wash away everything that had been done to her.

How much have I worried this person?

She has been so devoted to me.

Even though she is my mother’s sister, she is supposed to be a stranger to me.

“Why does Sekka-san do so much for me?”

“I think you can understand that now, Yuki?”

“…Because you love me?”

“It’s natural. I love you. I love you too, Yuki-chan!”

The feel of it on my lips. So sweet and soft.

Aah, why are people so, so warm?

“I just wanted to ask you one thing. Yuki-chan was always the same in front of me all the time. The mindset I put on Yuki-chan had progressed to the point where it was out of control. Why is that so?”

Yes, the usual silly thoughts. It rang out in front of Sekka-san.

I had never thought of such a thing before. It’s strange to think back, but the answer was so succinct and clear.

It must be–

“Because Sekka-san never once hurt me. “

Yes, this person had always protected me. She had saved me from the very moment I was about to die. She had always given me love when I thought I had been rejected by everything. She gave me a place to stay. She told me it was okay to stay.

From that time until today, how much thought and care has she given to me for my sake? It can only be called devotion.

You are reading story The Girls Who Traumatized Me Keep Glancing at Me, but Alas, It's Too Late (LN) at novel35.com

She has always offered it to me. I naturally bowed my head.

“Thank you very much.”

“Yuki-chan……Yuki-chan!””

Sekka-san was smiling. The tears were shining so brightly that even I could tell they were not caused by sadness.

“You are not full, right?”

“Speaking of which, I’ve learned how to make sushi.”

“Really?”

“The owner taught me how to make sushi. I’ll go with you next time, Sekka-san.”

Sekka-san and I were taking a bath together. It is a habit that has continued since then.

Every time I come to Sekka-san’s place, she forcefully invites me to join her, so I don’t feel shy now.

However, my gaze was wandering in the void. Look, I’m an adolescent, you know.

“The spell is broken, Yuki-chan, you may get hurt in the future. Are you still okay with that?”

“I’m fine. It seems there are many people who can help me.”

“I see. I’m relieved.”

“Sekka-san will still help me, right?”

“Aah, mou! Yuki-chan is about 50% more adorable and cute today, Nee-chan, I can’t take it anymore!”

There were always many allies. As much as there was malice, there was also goodwill.

I just didn’t notice it. Instead of not getting hurt, I kept getting broken.

That’s over now. Even if I get hurt, I don’t want to break in a way that makes anyone else sad.

The strongest mentality, like a super hard nanotube, is gone. I don’t need it now.

But that’s okay. Maybe I can finally start to feel again.

My invincibility ends today.

“But—-

I couldn’t help but laugh.

Somehow. I’d gotten used to it.

It was only natural, come to think of it. It had been too long. I have known it for more than ten years now. No matter what I say, it is already a part of me, it is me.

“I like the old Yukito kokonoe as well. I don’t want to lose what Sekka-san has done for me”

“Yuki-chan……?”

Pang,, I get up from the bathtub. Pow!

“I, Yukito Kokonoe, am the one who buys dollars in case the yen depreciates excessively!”

After all, given the current world situation, I am not sure how long I can remain at ease in Japan. It is one of the splendid asset building to exchange your savings into dollars little by little. This is not the time for peace and tranquility.

It’s absolutely hilarious. Yes, I’m like this, too. It is not a fake personality. It is not a fake. I am different. This me is me, too.

“Yuki-chan, you are admirable! And that …… person down there is admirable, too.”

The cheeks of Sekka-san are flushed with red. Eh, wait a second. What am I showing off to Sekka-san? Isn’t it too imposing? It’s true that Sekka-san and I have been taking baths together since I was a little kid, but I’m such an adolescent myself. Paoong.

“Don’t worry! I’ve prepared a rubber for you. I’m fine without one if you want!”

“No, that’s not it!”

“I’ve got reverse bunnies!”

“What did you say! Thank you for the worst answer I’ve ever heard in this situation!”

Could this be the Hikaru Genji Plan!? [TL: The Hikaru Genji Plan refers to a proposed project in Japan to increase the birthrate by promoting romance and matchmaking among young people, named after the romantic hero of the classic Japanese novel “The Tale of Genji.”]

[Sekka PoV]

Pow!

Yuki-chan is sleeping adorably. Finally, this day has arrived.

For both of us, today was the “promised day. I have been waiting only for this day.

I wanted Yuki-chan to realize that he was loved by me as I watched him break down all the time.

Yuki-chan said that I had never hurt her, but in reality, that was not true.

I had hurt Yuki-chan the most. If only I had not done what I did, things would not have gotten so complicated. Still, at that time, I had no choice but to do what I did.

I had only one wish. I didn’t want Yuki-chan to die.

But that was the only thing that kept Yuki-chan suffering.

And yet, he said thank you to me. I felt as if I had been rewarded.

Yuki-chan affirmed what I had done.

I felt as if the fog had finally lifted, and I couldn’t stop crying.

It’s all right now, Yuki-chan. You’ve already realized it yourself.

I met Yuki-chan when he was much younger than I am now. He probably doesn’t even remember.

At the time, I was troubled by many things. I was in a period where I was unsure of what I should do.

It was during this time that I had the opportunity to take care of Yuki-chan at my sister’s house.

Yuki had been an outgoing child since then, but one day he called me “mama”. I’m her sister. I look like my sister. It’s easy to make a mistake, isn’t it?

Yuki-chan came to me in a daze, and when Yuki-chan called me that, he would fall asleep with a clatter. Yuki-chan’s face was even more innocent than it is now.

At that moment, my hesitation was gone. I was blown away by how trivial I had been worrying. My worries were insignificant.

There are more important things in life, I thought to myself as I watched Yuki-chan’s sleeping face.

I couldn’t bear the thought of Yuki-chan going through such a tragedy.

For the first time, I felt strong resentment toward my sister. What I had not expected was that Yuki-chan was just bad luck. Yuki-chan was always getting into trouble. Perhaps it was his nature, but at least in his childhood, Yuki-chan’s heart could not endure it.

I wanted to do something about it. It was a trivial little help. A little symptomatic treatment.

It was a spell that could be quickly broken, and that was how I felt at first.

I never thought it would last this long. ……

But it’s finally over. Yuki-chan said he has someone who can help him. So it’s going to be okay.

I don’t need any more spells to protect Yuki-chan’s heart.

No more need to reset her mind.

My meddling in your life is over. I’m sure that from now on, Yuki-chan won’t come to me like he used to. I’ll miss you. ……

“……Sekka-san……”

Is he talking in his sleep? Yuki-chan is mumbling softly.

Don’t, don’t, don’t. I can’t tie Yuki-chan up any longer!

I am the one who has been tormenting Yuki-chan all this time. I am the one who has destroyed you.

That’s what I think, and yet my rational mind is making that decision, but when I see Yuki-chan, I can’t stand it. I feel the urge to spoil him.

Because I love him so much.

I was sure that when Yuki-chan realized the truth, he would hate me.

No wonder. I am the cause and source of everything. Yuki-chan had every right to hate me.

And yet, on the contrary, he thanked me for it. I hadn’t seen Yuki-chan smile since the day he called me “mom” when I was much younger.

Until then, I had felt guilty and obligated to do something about it.

But if Yuki-chan forgave me, then from now on—-

What a year and what a waste of time. If I told my friends, they would doubt my sanity.

The age difference between us is a stark fact that cannot be covered up.

But even so, I cannot suppress it.

I can’t put a lid on this feeling.

—–I am in love with this boy.

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