.
The kids in the class actually looked at the girl while tapping and whispering to each other and began to offer words of encouragement that she also did well in the test.
Someone asked mischievously, ‘Hey, how dare you think about winning Yeo Ryung at the test?’
It could sound quite unpleasant since the girl tried hard to get better scores than Yeo Ryung. However, she just scratched the back of her head and smiled willingly.
‘Since this is our last exam in elementary school, I think I was nervous, but now I come to think of it, I agree that I’ve been so greedy,’ replied the girl.
Then she raised her head and called, ‘Hey, Ban Yeo Ryung!’ who was putting her report card in her backpack. Yeo Ryung directed her eyes to the girl in surprise.
Lifting her thumb, the girl uttered, ‘You are indeed the best! Show what you’ve got in middle school too.’
Ban Yeo Ryung looked bewildered, but she soon showed an awkward smile, nodding her head. The girl gently pulled Yeo Ryung on her shoulder.
‘Let’s go grab some snacks out there. It’s on me,’ she said.
Resting my chin on my palm, I watched the girl and Ban Yeo Ryung leaving the classroom through the backdoor. Then I turned my head, giving a snort, and thought the girl would soon bring Yeo Ryung back to the class after having some short quality time.
After a while, I stepped outside the class to wash a mop in the bathroom for my weekly duty, and there I bumped into the girl. Throwing a glance outside the bathroom, I asked her–
‘Where’s Yeo Ryung? You two went outside together.’
‘She’s with other friends. By the way, you…’
With a twisted smile, the girl tossed a question.
‘How well did you do in the test?’
Holding the mop, I hesitated for a second, then replied–
‘I got the third-highest score in the class. Why?’
‘I’m the second-highest.’
‘So, what?’
Blurting out apathetically, I tried to leave the spot and walk away from her. If she didn’t grab my wrist so tightly, I would have definitely done that.
My brows met in the middle. I turned around to look at her.
‘What the heck are you doing? It hurts!’
‘It hurts? You grabbed mine harder than this.’
‘Hey, that’s because you ch… I mean you did something suspicious…’
I tried to use the word ‘cheat’ but quickly changed it into something else since Ban Yeo Ryung wanted to just move on anyway. I grumbled in my thoughts–
‘Come on, you cheated on the test a hundred percent! How could you dare behave so confidently and say to Ban Yeo Ryung that you admit her as the best student in the class and want to buy her some snacks? How shameless are you…?’
That was when I shouted those things in my mind. The girl suddenly pushed her head out right in front of my eyes. Being taken aback, I took a step back.
Just as Ban Yeo Ryung described, she was much taller than average elementary school kids. So were her shoulders, broad for a girl her age.
She uttered in a dark voice–
‘Hey, honestly, I thought Ban Yeo Ryung’s the worst in our class, but I was wrong.’
Pushing me all the way to the wall, the girl tapped my shoulders and continued–
‘You, you’re the worst as*hole!’
‘What??’
‘I mean, to think of it, suspecting me of cheating on the test is, in the end, the same as doubting my academic performance. If it was Ban Yeo Ryung who did that, I’d rather just tolerate her, but you…? Who do you think you are to butt in?’
The girl jabbed her index finger into my shoulder. Even though the memory of this moment flashed before my eyes, it was so vivid that I seemed to feel the slight pain around my shoulders.
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She added with a fierce expression–
‘You said that I did it to win Ban Yeo Ryung at the test, but wasn’t it actually you who wanted to have better scores than me, and therefore, drove me to the corner, talking crap that I cheated on the test?’
‘Excuse me???’
‘Why do you act like an as*hole when Ban Yeo Ryung says she’s okay. Your scores are lower than me, aren’t they?’
The girl then murmured how ridiculous I was. She swept her hair back and smiled.
Now it was me who became speechless. Regardless of the truth, she was the one who acted suspiciously, taking out a piece of a summarized note during the exam. So, why would I have to hear such a thing from her just because my test scores were lower than her?
At that moment, the girl spoke determinedly–
‘Hey, you think you’re doing good, right? Kind and righteous… Since Ban Yeo Ryung is too timid, you think you’re supposed to interfere in all situations and solve things out on behalf of her, huh?’
The girl continued her sarcastic remark.
‘You know, I’ve kept an eye on you from the beginning of the semester, so let me give you advice. DON’T FLATTER YOURSELF. Ban Yeo Ryung doesn’t need you. Instead, you were able to withstand because you had Ban Yeo Ryung beside you. Get it?’
‘What the hell are you talking about?’ I asked.
Looking frigid, the girl crossed her arms.
‘As I said, other kids treated you right because Yeo Ryung was staying next to you, or else, they would have never paid any attention to a person like you. Didn’t you see it yesterday? No matter how desperate you were to insult me that I cheated on the test, no one was doubtful about it when Ban Yeo Ryung said she was fine.’
After her words, I was blanked out. The girl pressed my shoulders against the wall firmly again.
‘See? Now you get it? You’re a parasite!’
The girl kept on speaking with a sneer–
‘Let’s be honest. I have no idea why Ban Yeo Ryung lets you stay beside her. She’s pretty, sweet, intelligent, just perfect… utterly incomparable to you. If she has the same personality as you, I’d understand, but no, she isn’t. You don’t deserve it.’
Pushing my shoulders, she quietly added, ‘She’s way out of your league,’ but that voice sounded so real that I, in the real world, rubbed my nape that had goosebumps all over.
‘Please know your place!’
After striking the last retort, the girl left the bathroom. I grabbed the wet mop, dripping with water, and walked after her.
My heart pounded harder, the closer I got to my classroom. It was a fear that I’d never experienced before. Through the open backdoor, Ban Yeo Ryung and the other kids laughing came into view. Watching the sight, I repeated to myself what the girl said to me earlier–
I’m a parasite.
It was indeed true. The pretty, sweet, intelligent, and perfect Ban Yeo Ryung deserved to be the center of attention in the class. So, maybe it was me, clinging onto Ban Yeo Ryung and nagging the kids when I was actually no one without her.
That was the day I became doubtful of myself for the first time.
The little Donnie in my memory and the real me were now combining together. The feelings within the two individuals were becoming one. At first, only the scenes and voices became obvious, but the thoughts I had in those moments were gradually delivered to me right now.
The little Donnie shook her head determinedly and came out from the whirlpool of thoughts. Me in the past then murmured–
‘Who cares about being pretty and intelligent? At least, I don’t. Ban Yeo Ryung is Ban Yeo Ryung, and I am who I am. I deserve the world, so I’d give it to myself.’
I’m fine…
The voice, calming down myself, spread out in my mind like ripples, but at the same time, I noticed that doubts had been already growing in those self-encouraging words.
It was inevitable.
If there wasn’t a big difference between my true nature and myself in this world, the reason why I grew up as a straightforward and confident person was utterly for Ban Yeo Ryung, who was reserved, silent, and likely to become easy prey.
Since young, I grew up, having that trust in my mind, and therefore, no signs of hesitation existed in my action. I was assured that it was all for Ban Yeo Ryung.
However, for the first time in my life, the truth was rocking me to my foundations. Everything that I did for Ban Yeo Ryung, was, in fact, being presumptuous with her at my back. That would be how others have actually perceived me.
I didn’t deserve to stay beside Ban Yeo Ryung–like Beauty and the Beast or Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
I was fourteen when I shifted to this universe, but the insensitive words I sometimes heard still hurt my feelings. The little Donnie was much younger than the teenage me, so I couldn’t even imagine how heartbroken she would have got back then.
Not knowing what to do, I just pouted my dried lips and stared at Ban Yeo Ryung in front of my sight.
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