Chapter 29: 27. Ehh? All humans can do that…?

-----Mi's POV-----

Yaaaaawn... So sleepy... I want to cuddle with Ru...

 

"Alright, you bastard! If you do that again, little Ya over here, will use her trusty club to make you unable to leave offspring, are we clear?" Granny Mara was threatening a wimp.

 

Ya was holding her club over her head. The wimp was laying on the ground covering his balls...

 

"Hehehe! This will hurt!" Ya was preparing herself to hit the man with all she has.

 

"No! Please wait! Let's talk about this...!" The wimp was looking at my little sister with a terrified expression.

 

A pity. The wimp will surely die if Ya hits him with all of her strength... Sigh... She's too loud... There's no way I can take a nap like this...

 

"Then fuck off outta here! I swear... You guys think that we ♦♦♦♦♦♦ ♦♦♦♦ ♦♦♦!" Granny Mara said with annoyance.

 

The wimp only nodded before quickly crawling towards the door. Ya was laughing at the sight.

 

Ya and I were keeping Granny Mara company. Ru was out with Silvia and Elise. They went to the temple or something like that. The rest of my little sisters are playing outside with some children... They said that it would be good practice before having our own kids with Ru. I'll try join them next time.

 

"Good job, Ya. Here, have some candy." Granny Mara gave some sweets to my little sister.

 

I want some too... But I also want to nap... This is difficult...

 

"Whoa! Thanks!" Ya was completely excited... In that instant, she let go off her club. The sound of a loud impact reached my ears... It was the sound of Ya's club hitting the ground.

 

Candy wins obviously... I want to taste some more again!

 

I opened up my eyes and stood up from my chair. I walked towards Granny Mara and showed her my hand. Ya already had an expression of delight...

 

"Can I have some candy, please?" I looked at her with pleading eyes.

 

She smiled at me and pulled a ball covered in paper from her pocket.

 

"If you show me a wide smile, then I'll give you some. Hehe!" Granny giggled.

 

I showed her my teeth just like she asked... She then started pinching my cheeks...

 

Ah... It hurts a bit... Why do Silvia and Granny Mara like to do this...?

 

"Jeez! You all are so adorable! You remind me of Lara when she was little! Here you go!" She stopped pinching my cheeks and gave me the candy.

 

I removed the paper and threw the piece of candy into my mouth... A sweet taste was spreading in my mouth. Granny said that these candies were made out of honey.

 

I don't know what honey is, but I cannot describe how delicious it is...

 

"Tasty." I was satisfied.

 

I like sweets so much...

 

While I was enjoying the candy, a muscular bald man walked towards Granny Mara. He seemed a bit annoyed.

 

"Mom... What did you say to Lara? She has been ♦♦♦♦♦♦ for a while now..." The man spoke...

 

So he's the son of Granny Mara huh... He looks strong... I mean, not as strong as Ru but he still looks strong.

 

"Rigant... Lara was rude to a precious guest... Sigh... I told you that it was a bad idea to move from the capital..." Granny looked really annoyed.

 

Capital? What's that? Is that also a town? I need to ask Silvia about this... Human culture is confusing...

 

"Mom... Again with that? We talked about this over and over again..." The man called Rigant looked frustrated. He was scratching his head with frustration.

 

"Rigant, you and Orella might have talked a lot about it, but you certainly didn't talk with Lara and I enough... The poor girl is ♦♦♦♦♦... I get that. But she can't be rude to customers just because ♦♦♦♦♦♦ ♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ her friends! She needs to be a grown up and get over that incident!" Granny had a serious expression.

 

"Sigh... I'll talk to her later... There was no future for us in the capital... With the future ♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ of the highway to Sholukhur, we will gain enough money to ♦♦♦♦ ♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ ♦♦♦!" Rigant said with a smile.

 

Ngn... It is getting difficult to follow their conversation... The human language is also difficult...

 

"Open your eyes, Rigant! There's no way that they will build that highway with so many bandits around! Those two adventurers died! The adventurer's guild and the kingdom are not going to do anything! This was a mistake!" Granny Mara got angry.

 

I have several questions... What's a bandit? Is it food? Or is it a weapon? Also what's a kingdom!? More things I will need to ask to Silvia...

 

"I'm not going to talk about this again. We just need to be ♦♦♦♦♦♦, mom." Rigant pulled out some sort of stick and placed it in his mouth. He then used magic to lit on fire the end of that stick... The stick was now producing smoke...

 

What the heck is that!? Why would he make fire so close to his mouth?

 

"I'll be outside... Tell me if someone orders anything..." Rigant went outside the building with that burning stick in his mouth.

 

I looked at Ya and she looked as confused as I was... She didn't care for long and she continued to enjoy her candy. With Rigant outside, only Granny Mara, Ya and I were in the room.

 

"Sigh... What a stubborn son..." Granny sighed.

 

She pulled a chair and then sat while having an annoyed look.

 

"I ended up raising a fool for a son... What a pain..." She said in annoyance.

 

I pulled a chair and sat besides her.

 

"Why is he a fool?" I asked.

 

"Ah! Don't worry about that, Mi! It is just a family matter." She said while smiling at me.

 

"Is that so?"

 

I'm getting sleepy again... I want Ru to come here quickly to take a nap together...

 

"Mi, tell me more about your relationship with Ru!" There was a strange expression on her face.

 

"He's our man. Silvia said that we were going to go to the temple soon to get married." I said.

 

Marriage is a strange concept for me... I don't fully understand it yet... Silvia said that is something that people do when they are in love. I don't really get why is it necessary a ceremony... Ru said that he loved us and we love him back, that should be enough, right? We are his and he is ours, it is a simple as that.

 

"He's your man huh... I'm so envious! You have been living in the forest nearby, right? All of you must be extremely talented hunters!" She said with a lot of enthusiasm.

 

"We're the best!" Ya answered before I could. She was smiling brightly.

 

But she's right. There are no better hunters than us!

 

I nodded in agreement.

 

"Ah... The sweet youth... I miss those days... What wouldn't I give to go back to when I was young..." Granny Mara was smiling bitterly.

 

She suddenly grabbed one of the candies and tossed it into her mouth.

 

"Strange... I don't remember the candies tasting like this... Ah... It must be the old age..."

 

She was savoring the candy...

 

"Where was I? Ah... My youth, right... Sigh if only I was young again... I could spend a night doing ♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ and ♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ and also ♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ ♦♦♦♦♦ ♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ with that handsome Ru. Sheesh... You ladies are extremely lucky! I have never seen such a beautiful man..." She smiled bitterly again.

 

I didn't really understand what she wants to do with Ru... I'll have to ask Silvia to translate those strange words for me. I hope that I remember the words by the time Silvia and Ru return...

 

Suddenly, something strange started happening to Granny Mara... She was getting a taller... Her white hair was starting to turn red...

 

Ya and I looked at each other with a puzzled look...

 

What kind of weird magic is this? Can all humans do the same thing?

 

"My husband was also good looking but not as much as your future husband... He and I used to go on adventures all the time... We almost died a bunch of times, but that's what makes an adventure fun!" She smiled warmly.

 

She was missing some teeth... Those teeth were coming out again...

 

"I remember that we once challenged a dungeon... The entrance was in a forest... We ended up getting lost and we found a different dungeon... It was filled to the brim with undead. Ah... The face of terror of my husband was priceless! Hahaha!" Granny Mara was now laughing loudly.

 

By this point, half of her hair was already red again... It was also getting longer.

 

"Do you know how we completed that dungeon? We just went straight towards the boss room despite his protests and pitiful screams! I gotta admit that him blasting some zombies with his magic was really hot!" Her voice was becoming even more youthful.

 

Humans are scary! Can all of their elders do this!?

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"The boss was a real problem though. No matter how many time I managed to hit the bastard, it simply refused to go down... My husband had turned into paperweight by that point. He tried to impress me blasting some more zombies and he ended up using all of his mana... He did manage to impress me. Hehe!" She smiled bitterly and then giggled. She had all of her teeth back...

 

Her nightgown was now too small for her to wear. It was being teared apart while Granny Mara was getting taller... Most of her hair was now bright red, just like Ya's hair...

 

Both Ya and I looked at each other while being completely shocked and scared.

 

"That! That's the same expression that my husband had when the boss sent me flying against a wall! I laughed a lot when I saw it! Luckily for us, I managed to find the weak point of that bastard and managed to destroy it with my trusty warhammer!" Granny Mara nodded to herself confidently.

 

Ru! Come back! I'm scared!

 

"Hmmm... Something feels a bit off... My body doesn't hurt at all... You two also look a bit smaller. How curious." She rubbed her chin.

 

I couldn't answer to her... The sudden change in her appearance left me speechless...

 

Her hair was long and completely red coloured. Her nose was full of freckles. Her face no longer had any more wrinkles. She looked just as young as her granddaughter... Not only that... Her breasts are bigger than mine...

 

That irritated me... Why does everyone have bigger breasts than me!? It is so unfair!

 

"Ah, nevermind about that! You must be eager to hear about the rest of our adventures! Sit on tight! Because you two girls are in for a ride!" She said with a wild smile.

 

Her body stopped changing... Granny Mara was no longer a granny... She was a beautiful muscular young woman... She was as beautiful as Silvia! Are all humans able to do that once they are old!?

 

Granny Mara continued to tell us stories while Ya and I were looking at her dumbfounded...

---

-----Astera's POV-----

"I'm back Tomoko! How are you doing? I hope you weren't too lonely without me!" I said to the black haired beauty in front of me who was wearing an apron made out of silk. Underneath that apron, she's wearing a black dress similar to mine with some high heels.

 

(Ah! Lady Astera!) She looked at me and smiled. I was reading her thoughts.

 

Hehehe! I'm also happy to see her!

 

Tomoko and I are currently staying in a town called Alorari, in the Kingdom of Bilna. The town is a three days away on foot from the town of Norvek, where our little goblin hero is currently staying.

 

Per the request of my sister, Arrat, I have been gathering some necessary materials and money to help out on her plan... That's my punishment for playing a prank on Electra and Ru...

 

I know it has been a short time, but thanks to the marvelous skills of Tomoko we have gained a lot of money! Not enough to help with my sister's plan, but just enough to cover our expenses while staying here. We have been selling some small figurines made out of Tomoko's silk.

 

We are currently renting a small house in the outskirts of the town.

 

Hmm? What was I doing before? I'm glad that you asked! You see... I was tasked by Arrat to give a sweet grandma that lives in Norvek a Chaos Candy. It was apparently important for Arrat's plan.

 

What's a Chaos Candy? That's a good question! The Chaos Candy is a marvelous thing! It has the ability to return any mortal to the prime of their youth! For gods it is just a normal candy though. This wonderful invention was made by my dear grandpa!

 

So, that sweet old lady must have returned back to her youth. She should be around 18 to 19 years old by now.

 

Why did Arrat wanted that to happen? I dunno. Didn't ask her why and didn't plan to ask. It is none of my business.

 

Anywaaaay!

 

(Lady Astera, I made some meat stew! Do you want to eat some?) She asked with a warm smile.

 

"You bet I do!" I ran towards the table and took a seat.

 

Tomoko just served me a plate of hot beef stew with a warm smile. She really looks like a very mature housewife! Well, she still looks like a loli but she's still taller than our beloved goblin hero.

 

(Here you go! Please enjoy!) She smiled warmly.

 

Why is she acting like this? Well... Her mind is currently filled with very mature scenes with said goblin hero that I won't talk about during our meal... Thanks to those scenes, she's determined to become the perfect housewife in order to take care of him and their future spiderlings.

 

Yep... She has fallen even more in love with him in the last day... She's a lost cause now... I dunno how she reached the conclusion that she had to become the perfect housewife...

 

Tomoko simply sat in front of me with her plate and waited for me to taste it.

 

"Itadakimasu!" I said before I grabbed my spoon and started eating.

 

Hmm? Why did I say that? Several of my grannies are Japanese, so I'm used to saying that. Speaking of them... I should give them a call when I have some free time.

 

(How is it, Lady Astera?) Tomoko asked with a charming smile.

 

"Very good! Thank you!" I answered.

 

Tomoko then tasted the stew herself.

 

(Hmmmm... Something is missing... Maybe a couple of flies or maybe a frog... Yeah... That would add more flavour to the stew...) She rubbed her chin while pondering.

 

Ah... That's one of the consequences of her life as a spider... She likes eating a lot of strange things...

 

"Tomoko... Don't put strange things in your husband's food, okay? It is fine if you like it, but goblins don't like to eat insects..." I said to Tomoko.

 

We don't want our beloved hero to get sick after all... The stew is actually delicious as it is.

 

(I guess I'm still not used to eating actual food... I should relearn how to cook... Thanks for the advice, Lady Astera!) Tomoko smiled warmly.

 

"You already are a superb cook... I'm just asking you to not put any insects on food that will be eaten by other people." I said after taking another spoonful of the stew into my mouth.

 

The seasoning is just perfect. She really did a great job!

 

She nodded in understanding.

 

We then ate everything without leaving any leftovers...

 

We left the table and I sat at the couch.

 

"Phew... That was tasty..." I was rubbing my belly.

 

I had forgotten how good was actual food compared to instant ramen...

 

(Ah, Lady Astera. I forgot to mention that I made more figurines while you were out. I left them in your room.) Tomoko smiled before leaving with our plates to clean them up.

 

Jeez... She has turned into quite the industrious girl... She used to be almost as lazy as me. I guess the cure for lazyness is being reborn as a spider. I won't do that though... I'm fine being lazy.

 

The figurines that she made to sell are representations of the Gods. In other words, my relatives and parents. They are really popular because they look very very realistic. Well, the people in this town are also very religious.

 

Tomoko is a great artist! I just showed her a couple of photos of my siblings and she was able to make small idols of them with silk!

 

Hmm? The first figurine she made? There's no need to be a genius to know what was the first thing she tried to make...

 

She made a life-sized doll of our dearest goblin hero... That doll is currently on top of her bed. It looks exactly like him... Well, minus the golden skin but it really does look like him.

 

Hmm? How does she know how he looks like right now? Simple! I showed her! She was quite delighted to see it.

 

Anyway, the second figurine was based on me... I was completely flattered by that!

 

That figurine of me is really beautiful! I actually kept the figurine and it is currently on top of my nightstand.

 

Tomoko then sat besides me on the couch... I was still rubbing my belly... I think I might have eaten too much...

 

(Lady Astera... Can you tell me a bit more about him?) She asked with a flushed face.

 

Sheesh... This spider maiden in love... She really is desperate about meeting him again...

 

"Fine... What do you want to know?" I said.

 

(Would he find me attractive!? How many kids does he want to have!? Would he be okay living in a nest!? What's his favourite food!? Is there something he's afraid of!?) Tomoko then started bombarding me with questions...

 

Oh boy... This will be rough...

 

"Tomoko... Slow down... I can't answer all of those questions at the same time..." I said to her.

 

Well, I actually can. I can just insert that information directly into her brain, but honestly that's very annoying and it would hurt a lot for her. So, I prefer not doing that.

 

(Sorry! I just can't help it... I just think about him and... Ahh...) Tomoko was suddenly lost in thought... She started making another life-sized doll of her loved one.

 

Sigh... We really lost her... I don't think there's much we can do to help her now...

 

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