-Epilogue: Together Forever-
The church bells rang out overhead, their thunderous gonging demanding the attention of all the faithful. Or, at least all the tourists. Anna and I certainly numbered among those, but we were leaving Notre-Dame when the bells started, and the core-rattling noise inspired more discomfort in me than awe. I covered my ears to block out the echoing booms, and Anna promptly chuckled at my contorted expression as we walked across the pavilion.
Once we were far enough away that the droning of the bells no longer hurt to listen to, Anna held her hand out, shooting me an expectative glance. I've never been one for pda, even in the most subdued fashion, but Anna never seemed to mind, and I was in a good enough mood that some innocent hand holding sounded nice. So, she took my hand in hers, and I followed her along the cobblestone roads. The sounds of the Parisian streets reverberated around us, the voices of the crowds forming a resonant murmur as we made our way past the many storefronts. The soft summer breeze blew the hem of my dress against my legs, Anna's gentle grasp of my hand guiding my way. Despite the hectic bustle of the streets, and how busy we had been, there was something deeply soothing and peaceful about the whole experience.
It was early in the afternoon, and we'd planned to grab something to eat before we got to our evening activities. Anna spied a little cafe on a street corner that seemed to pique her interest, so we ducked through the entryway, slipping away from the crowds outside, finally affording us a chance to talk to one another without having to shout. Anna made sure I was okay with eating there, which I was, and we placed orders for a couple lattes and crepes. Well, Anna placed our order anyway; unlike mine, her French was actually intelligible. The young woman behind the counter gave us our pastries and went to fix the drinks, and Anna and I sat ourselves at a small table by the window. Watching the foot traffic pass outside, we made small talk.
"So," Anna inquired, taking a bite of her strawberry crepe, "was the cathedral everything you thought it'd be?"
"For sure! The inside was beautiful, don't you think?"
"Yeah, it puts the photos to shame. A bit too quiet, though. I bet a rave in there'd be crazy!"
"You don't like those kinds of parties though…?"
"No," she retorted, "but I would totally go to a rave in Notre-Dame cathedral!"
"Well, I don't think they're having one of those any time soon."
"Yeah, it's a real shame…" she said, feigning disappointment.
"But, it is historically and culturally significant. I think that's impressive enough in its own right."
"Oh, for sure!" Anna beamed. "So much has happened in and around that place! Just building it took over a hundred fifty years. It's survived so much change and so many conflicts. The site even started out as a Roman temple back during antiquity!"
"Well, you can get your Roman fix when we go down there next week," I said. I felt like I was calming a kid down at an amusement park.
"I know, I just think it's really interesting! History's so fucking cool!"
I couldn't help but laugh. She really did look like a jubilant child.
"Hey, I might not be as… enthusiastic about it as you, but I'm into history, too!"
"Well," she said with a playful smile, "I'll make sure some of my enthusiasm rubs off on you before our trip's done!"
"Heh, I don't doubt that. Seeing you so excited's definitely been fun for me these last couple days."
Anna giggled, making me smile in turn. I couldn't get over how cute she looked.
After a moment, I turned the conversation back to the business at hand.
"Anyway, we don't have anything planned for the rest of the day, right? Just walking around the city?"
"Yeah, I just wanna get to the Eiffel Tower a little after sunset. It's about an hour's walk from here, though, so there's no rush."
"Why do you wanna see it after the sunset, specifically?" I asked, cocking my head to the side.
"Because the lights are pretty, duh."
"Hmm…" I mumbled, resting my chin on my palm. "Not as pretty as you, though~"
Anna stuck her tongue out in jest. I was about to give her a poke when the waitress came with our coffees. We thanked her and sipped the warm, foamy drinks.
"Oh my," I said, licking away the foam mustache I felt on my upper lip, "this is delicious!"
Anna smiled warmly as she set her cup down.
"It's no Double Tap, but it is pretty good."
"Hehe… I remember when I told Lisa I was saving up for this, she tried to give me a raise."
"Hmhm, that does sound like her…" Anna said.
She took a breath, propping her cheek upon her hand. Anna glanced out the window for a moment before taking another sip of her coffee. I took a bite of my own crepe, looking back up from the plate to see her staring at me, smiling warmly.
"I still can't believe you did this…" she sighed contently, "I swear, I've got the best girlfriend in the world~"
I found myself blushing at her compliment;
"Hey, I didn't pay for all of it. And besides, like I said, it's a gift for us both to celebrate our third anniversary!"
"Still…" she said, taking another small sip of her drink. "I'd dreamed of doing this for so long, but getting to do it with you… It's better than anything I could have hoped for…"
Anna reached up, gently caressing my blushing face;
"I love you, Sophie~"
"I love you too, Anna~" I whispered, gently touching her hand as she stroked my cheek. She quickly leaned across the table, planting a small kiss on my lips.
This is heaven…
I should probably fill in the timeline here. After that first night together, Anna and I were practically inseparable. We spent the rest of my week off with each other. I helped her unpack and settle into her apartment, and she gave me some more of her old clothes. We spent a lot of time just hanging out like we always did, but there was also plenty of flirting and cuddling mixed in now. That just made everything so much better. Even when I went back to work, and eventually when Anna started school, we spent all of our free time together, either at her place or mine. During those first few months, every moment we were apart was spent thinking about getting to see each other again.
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I told my family everything the next week. This might come as a surprise, but my parents were as taken aback by my announcement that I was trans as they were by my SIS diagnosis. Maybe even more so. But, after a few weeks, and them coming home and seeing how well I was doing, they quickly came to support my decision. They did not, however, need any convincing of my relationship with Anna. They were both over the moon when they heard the news, and both independently asked what took us so long to finally start going out. But, I don't mind how long it took. It was more than worth the wait.
When I told Lisa Anna and I were a thing, I thought I'd never hear the end of it. I think she was as excited we were finally going out as we were. Okay, so that's a bit of an exaggeration, but I was fawned over for a full week and a half of shifts. I love Lisa, and she's a great boss, but she's definitely a handful sometimes. Over the months, Anna and I also met up with some of our old friends from high school every now and then. Those get-togethers were filled with a lot of "Is that really you, James?" and "It took you two long enough to get together," comments, but it was still good to see everyone, regardless.
About six months after Anna and I started going out, my parents mentioned wanting to downsize. I agreed with them that it was a good idea, and decided to move in with Anna. Fitting both of us into her one bedroom apartment was tough at first, but we managed. Some might have thought it uncomfortable, but we made it cozy. It wasn't like either of us had too much stuff to begin with, so it wasn't as hard as it might seem. And, on an important side note, every time I see that black and white stuffed sheep sitting next to each other on the bed or around the apartment, it brings a smile to my face. Winston and Watson were almost as cute together as Anna and I. Almost.
It was also around that time that I finally got to meet Anna's sister, Madeline. We all met up at a restaurant for the first time, and the timid little girl I'd seen a few times when Anna and I were teens had grown into a mature young woman. Definitely more level headed than her big sister, anyway. We got on well, and at one point, when Anna left to use the restroom, she told me how much Anna used to talk about me, which was very touching and sweet to hear. In a way, Maddy and I had a kind of solidarity; we were the only people there for Anna when she was at her lowest. She and I both know just how special Anna really is. We probably know her better than anyone else does. After just a couple meetings, Madeline started calling me her sister. I was genuinely moved. I'd never had a sibling before, but, honestly, she felt like one to me. And, true to her word, Anna went to her graduation, and I went with her. It took every ounce of my self control not to explode when I saw Anna's family there, but I kept my head on. Fortunately, they didn't see Anna and I, so there wasn't any issue. Maddy was genuinely elated when she saw us there, and I'm really glad I got to go. She really is family to me.
Anna kept at her studies, and after a couple years, she got her degree. Studying psychology helped her start working through her own trauma, and she even started seeing a therapist. I always went with her as emotional support, and, after a lot of work, I think she really has moved past what happened to her, after hurting for so many years. After Anna earned her degree, she ended up working as the school psychologist at our old high school. I'd listen to her happily tell me when she made a lot of progress with one of the kids, and I'd comfort her on those hard days when the weight of her role got to her. Ultimately, however, Anna really took to her work as a counselor, and it was wonderful to see.
Meanwhile, I kept working at the Double Tap for some time. It was mundane, but it paid the bills. After a few months together, I realized something I wanted to do; I would save up and get Anna her trip to Europe. When she got busy with school, and after having spent a considerable amount of what she'd saved on me, Anna mostly stopped setting money aside for it, so I decided to step in. I couldn't spare much cash for it, but every paycheck, I'd squirrel a little money away. One year of saving turned into two.
By that time, I'd decided to go back to school, myself. After pinballing around potential career ideas for years, I finally settled on trying to become an English teacher. As of now, I'm about halfway through my master's degree. I also decided to try my hand at writing a novel, but progress on that's been… slow. But I'm gonna get there! Regardless, even though paying for school left me with even less money to save up, I finally managed to get enough together to surprise Anna in time for our third anniversary. The look of genuine joy and those happy tears on her face when I told her are gonna stick with me forever. We planned out the trip, and she used the little bit she still had from her own savings all those years ago to add on a couple extra stops.
Throughout those three years, as Anna and I finally settled in together and the seasons changed, so too did our relationship. Those first sparks began to fade, but… isn't that the point? Sparks aren't meant to last forever; they light fires. And fires can help you survive. They can keep you warm and safe. They can nurture and comfort. Over time, those dazzling sparks came and went, but the fire kept burning and smoldering. So, being together wasn't always the exciting thing it had been at the start. Don't get me wrong, there was still plenty of excitement, but things became more normal. More comfortable. We were a part of each other's lives. She became an irreplaceable piece of me. We share a constant comfort with one another. I'm never more at ease than when I'm with her, and there's nowhere I'd rather be than by her side. She's my home. She's my family. She's my heart. And she means everything to me.
We're always there for each other. We run errands. We go on dates. We cook for each other. We trade chores. We go on day trips when we get the chance. We hold each other when we're hurting. We watch shows and movies together, and get competitive when we play video games with each other. We cuddle together and watch the rain. We make love. We share stories and laugh and cry together. Sometimes we argue, but we don't really have fights, and we always find a way to talk out our differences. We know when to give each other space. We push each other to be our best.
Some days, we stay up into the small hours of the night talking and laughing, just enjoying being together. Others, we wake up early in the morning and banter and joke over breakfast. Many nights, we lay in each other's arms in bed and whisper to one another as we fall asleep. I'll write little love poems for Anna and hide them around our apartment. Sometimes she'll tease me for being corny, but she keeps them in a booklet, and reads them when she's having a bad day. From time to time, when life's stresses get to me, I'll rest my head on Anna's lap, and she'll gently stroke my hair and sing to me. And, like right now, we share our dreams with each other.
We complete each other.
And, when we travel to other cities, we go exploring together. We like to wander around and see what kinds of shops we can find, and what local events we can stumble across. So, after Anna and I finished our midday snack, we did just that. We wandered with no particular goal in mind, other than simply seeing what we could find. We would slip into odd little shops tucked away between multinational chains. We would stop and watch as people simply went about their days; the lifeblood of the city pumping through veins with street names. We trekked along the sidewalks and snaked through alleys, seeking out tourist spots and local curiosities alike.
There was something so enchanting about being willfully lost in a place like that. Old and new architecture mingled; history and modernity intertwined in a subtle but remarkable way you might not notice or think about if you weren't paying attention. Every city has its own culture and atmosphere, and a place as old, vast, and significant as Paris was a sight to behold simply by virtue of existing. A kind of majesty that could be understood by a local, but still admired and appreciated by an outsider. Like Anna had said, being able to walk through a place with so much history woven into its streets was an experience unlike any other, and we still had plenty more cities to see, each with their own intricate and rich stories. I think I really did share her excitement for this trip.
As the sun began to dip, and the blue of the sky slowly shifted toward a deep orange, we began to make our way toward the Eiffel Tower, as Anna had requested. Yet, despite her apparent eagerness to see it, she grew increasingly quiet as we drew nearer. At the time, I chalked this up to a sort of nervous excitement I couldn't fully understand. As we reached the gardens in front of the tower, the lights began to show, each twinkling faintly amid the intricate, massive wrought iron structure. We stood there in silence for a while, and I felt awed by the appropriately famous landmark. Eventually, I glanced at Anna, who seemed distracted.
"You were right!" I proclaimed. "It really is pretty!"
"Heh… It really is…"
She seemed tense, but I pressed on;
"It was definitely worth coming to see in the evening!"
"Yeah…" she said quietly, avoiding eye contact.
Okay, so, she's very tense, for some reason. Well, I thought I could try to lighten the mood with a joke, and see if that would help.
"Hey," I bantered, gently elbowing her in the side, "Why don't we make like all those couples in the pictures and get engaged in front of the tower?"
"Pfffft!"
Anna did a spit take, before suddenly bursting out with laughter at my not particularly funny joke. I mean, I was glad to get a laugh, and that she wasn't upset or anything, but it wasn't that funny, right? So why was she-
"Hahaha! Oh god, that really is cliché, isn't it?! Ha!"
She let out a whimsical sigh.
"Ahh shit... Oh well, it's fine. I, uh… I need to ask you something."
"Huh…?" I stammered, somehow oblivious to what was going on. Maybe 'in disbelief' would be a better way to describe it.
Anna reached into her purse, grabbing a hold of something before turning to face me. She looked at me with the sweetest, most innocent shine in her eyes, and an uncharacteristically shy smile.
"Sophie… I love you with all my heart, and… I want to be by your side forever, so…"
She withdrew a small felt box from her purse, and presented it to me, opening the lid to reveal a thin gold engagement ring.
"Will you marry me?"
I looked at her. At the beautiful, wonderful woman who'd been at the center of my world for so many years. Suddenly, my heart took flight, and I couldn't hold myself back;
"Oh, Anna! Yes!"
I threw myself onto her, wrapping my arms around her as joyous tears ran down my face. We held each other, and after a moment, we kissed, and I was in heaven.
And, when we broke off our kiss, I looked at her. At her gorgeous eyes, and her beautiful, loving smile, and I whispered,
"Oh my god… I'm gonna be your wife…!"
Those words were like music to me, and, somehow, I couldn't believe I'd actually just said them. But I had, and it was true, and it made me so, so happy, all I could do was cry, and look upon my perfect now-fiance.
Anna was beaming. She cupped my cheek with her free hand, gently wiping a tear away, and she answered me;
"That's right. And I'll be yours too… Always~"
And Anna leaned in, and kissed me again. We kissed, and I don't even have the words to describe how euphoric I was. I don't know if I'd ever felt as happy to be alive as I did at that moment. And, I remembered something. A feeling I'd experienced three years ago suddenly resurfaced with clarity. It resonated within me, and settled in the depths of my heart,
I really am the luckiest girl in the world.
~Fin~
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