Chapter 2: Chapter 2

If it had been cold in the High Lady’s office chambers, it was a level just above damnation here. The room was fairly dark with a concrete floor and stone walls laden with two glow-lamps on each. Their light barely pierced the veil of darkness in front of me, and for the most part they revealed only wet stone that preceded the sound of dripping caused by Sheena’s efforts to ‘cleanse’ me. She stood there just at the edge of the darkness in the company of another servant girl named Kayla. They both held dented tin buckets in their hands, now empty of the cleaning solution they had devised from ingredients found in a wooden cupboard just outside. 

“Are you certain we can do this?” Kayla asked her, as I stood there naked, my arms crossed over my chest in a vain attempt to thwart the cold that was working its way into my very bones. 

“By the High Lady’s leave,” Sheena assured her. “And, at the request of the former Master Lavoric. Tell me, Master Lavoric, what name would you choose for yourself now that you have been stripped of title and livelihood?”

“Name?” I said through chattering teeth; it took everything within me not to charge for the exit, toward the warmth of the next room. 

“You have chosen to live your life a servant girl, have you not? Surely you cannot be Micah Lavoric, Heir to the Throne of Axock. Or perhaps we should name you?” The words came from the girl beside her, Kayla. I looked from one to the other; the solution clung to my skin, presumably ridding me of any impurities that I might have carried into the manse with me. Lice, was apparently of their chief concern. 

“I would name her cupcake, perhaps,” Sheena suggested and then barely stifled a laugh. “Come servant girl, you made your choice, now make another. By what shall we call you?”

“Perhaps we should call her Little Brat,” Kayla offered up another suggestion. “She thinks herself too good to speak to us.”

I opened my mouth to speak but the very breath was stolen from my body as a splash of freezing cold water washed over me, a strained gasp escaped my lips as I stumbled backward and sprawled across the stone floor. There was no reprieve; a second bucket was launched and another wave of water bathed me, causing me to lose what remained of my balance and sent me crashing to the floor as I made vain efforts to restore myself to breath. 

“I will say that this does not seem impromptu,” Sheena stepped from the darkness and stood over me. If she’d seemed confident in the High Lady’s office, she now seemed like the personification of the Goddess herself. “The hair is of length, the body is free of blemishes, smooth shaven. This one considered herself female long before she came here.”

“I would honor such forethought,” Kayla stepped forward as well. 

“Regrettably,” Sheena said, looking down at me. “our charge is not to torment, but to instruct. Rise girl, and speak your name. I will not ask again.”

I was somehow exhausted, but that could be explained by my long journey from Axock, the confrontation with the High Lady Jenwise, and of course the rigorous decontamination process that Sheena and Kayla had subjected me to. My body was raw from the bristles of rough brushes, and my skin burned from the solution they had tossed on me, even as the last remnants of it crept from my body and made haste toward the drain at the center of the chamber. Defying the throbbing of my muscles and deep exhaustion of the mind, I forced myself to my feet and stood before the two girls. Sheena was my height, but Kayla stood perhaps two inches beneath me. Still, both still exuded their authority in this space and it was more clear than ever before that mine had been stripped from me.

“Your name,” She said insistently. “You must have one in mind. You’ve grown your hair in an almost feminine fashion, you have clean shaven your body, and you have made this unorthodox request of the Lady. Clearly this was your intention from the start. Speak your name.”

“My name,” I said in a rhaspy voice as I tried to overcome the cold. “My name is Lyra.”

“Then, Lyra,” Kaya smiled. “Let us not tarry in the cold, come.”

“The High Lady Jenwise demands and expects that all of her staff would be presentable,” Sheena said as she led me down a well-lit hallway. She opened a door and waved me in where I found what looked like rows of narrow lockers lining the walls and down the center. Each wooden enclosure was doorless and comprised of a thin lattice, forming an upright cubby perhaps three feet in height. Most of the cubbies were occupied by hanging clothes, dresses pressed tight together to make the most use of the waning space they were afforded. “much, I presume, as you expected the staff at your Lavoric Manor to be.”

I couldn’t disagree with that. With Sheena in front and Kayla behind, we walked past several rows of cubbies until we reached one near the back. 

“This one is unoccupied,” Kayla observed as she left us and passed through a door a door at the back of the room. She returned with a bundle of clothing; the standard gray worker dresses that were worn by servant girls throughout Fadraiye. It occurred to me that Kayla was also dressed in gray, and that Sheena’s black and white uniform was reminiscent of an authority position among the servants. “You will dress in a manner befitting your station.”

I was mostly dry now, and the cold had subsided; the inside of this dressing room was moderate at the very least. Still, even though I was comfortable I couldn’t help but look at the bundle of clothing in disdain. I had asked to be the Lady’s cup bearer - a respectable position, even if a little low for my station, and she’d relegated me to be a common servant. Worse yet, I had let her! Scenario after fantastical scenario rushed through my head in the same vein as the water that had washed over me in the decontamination chamber. What if I had argued? What if I had strove to convince her otherwise? Why did I simply let her dictate that my life would take such a ridiculous course and what recourse did I have now? I took the dress from Kayla’s arms and the two of them watched as I pulled it over my head. I winced at the snugness in the waist area, and stood there devoid of any dignity as she straightened out the lapel and tied it in the back. 

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“Shoes,” Sheena handed me a pair of cloth shoes. I took them and turned them over in my hands. There was a disappointing quality about them; they were not sturdy and they certainly were not made for running. They came to a point at the toe and pressed mine together when I pulled them on. I could only wince at the pain that continued to manifest as I practiced walking in them. The shoe was a little snug in the back, and each step pressed my toes further together. 

“They’re tight,” I looked at her, hoping for some sympathy. 

“That would be how they stay on,” She said coldly. “We will discuss your tasks today in part, though the hour is growing late, and you will sleep before the light fades. Our day begins early tomorrow.”

I didn’t like the idea of rising early, but the fact that I would sleep soon, that thrilled me. Exhaustion had rocked my body more than once since I’d been led from the Lady Jenwise’s chambers and down the narrow staircase that eventually led to the decontamination chamber. I had dreaded every step into the darkness with only dim glow bulbs to guide us. Every stride was a measure further from my previous life and title, time that stretched out and away from the damning decision that I had made. If but I could go back and make a different proposition! But, as I stood there in the gray dress of a servant girl, with Sheena and Kayla inspecting me, I knew that I had made my mistake and that there was no correcting it. 

“Now I must ask you a pressing question, Lyra,” Sheena stepped back from me and looked into my eyes with what I almost perceived as concern. “Are you afraid?”

“What?” I frowned in confusion. What was she asking me?

“You find yourself in a perilous situation and while it is not unique to you, the uncertainty can be overwhelming, so answer me this. Are you afraid, Lyra?”

“Yes,” I answered truthfully.

“Then,” Sheena said. “it is my duty, as the first among the servants of the House of Jenwald, that you needn’t be. Your fear is justified but unfounded. The days ahead of you will be difficult, and the need to prove you worth will loom as a daunting shadow, but for so long as you are in my charge, my protection extends to you, as it does to the other girls in the service of the High Lady. Do you understand what I am saying?”

“I…I think so,” I frowned again. What was she saying this? Wasn’t I beneath her? Why would she care about me?

“Permit your mind to ease, servant girl, and follow me.”

I followed her from the room, through the back door with Kayla following closely behind. My heart nearly tore from my chest in the panic I experienced as we passed into a room filled with beds stacked atop one another. Bunks, of course, we had them in the soldier’s barracks back home. There were at least one hundred bunks in this vast space, and there were other girls, most dressed in the same gray uniform, and others in their undergarments walking to and fro. For such a highly occupied space, it was fairly quiet, with only the sound of muttering here and there. All in all, the conversation within the room could have been described as a dull hum. My heart began to beat quickly and my body tensed as one by one, the conversations stopped and the girls began to stare at me. I felt as if I were on display as Sheena led me through the room, every eye upon me, casting judgement before I even spoke. Did they recognize me? No, probably not; it was doubtful that anyone would recognize a noble out of context, even if I was no longer a noble. Some of the girls we passed looked stunned, others looked annoyed. A few were downright uninterested. At some point, my shock at the situation transformed into shock at just how many servants there were. But then, of course there were. The care of the Lavoric estate, my home, had called for the attention of nearly four hundred servants but I had never met them all; to me they had been but numbers in a ledger. But these were not numbers, these girls were real and while I wanted to despise them for being of a lower class, I was now among them and I had allowed it. I had allowed it!

“I call you to attention!” Sheena shouted, bringing the room to absolute silence. “And I call you to heed my words as though they were the words of the High Lady herself, for it is on her behalf that I speak to you! I give you, Lyra, a servant of the house of Jenwise. Despite her male status, she has made the choice, and the explicit request to be considered a servant girl within the House of Jenwise. You will treat her as you would any other servant girl as befitting of her station. Discussion of her former male status will not be tolerated! Gossip does not become us! These are my words and they will be heeded! Lyra, my word is given that you will be treated as, and regarded as any other girl here so long as you act within that role. Step outside of it, and punishment will be swift. The path you have chosen will be difficult, but you did choose it, and you will be reminded of that, should you forget. Am I understood, Lyra?” 

“Yes,” I said, practically choking on the words. 

“I am the First Girl of House Jenwise, you will address me as such,” She told me firmly.

“Yes…first girl,” I said reluctantly. Sheena nodded and walked away. Kayla led me to an empty bunk where a small foot locker sat at the end.

“Change into your bed clothes,” She instructed me. “Do what needs to be done before you sleep, and remember, we meet the morning swiftly.”

As I laid there in bed swaddled by a stiff, scratchy blanket in an unfamiliar environment, pitch black as the glow-globes were extinguished, I thought of my father. Somewhere, far off in Axock he would be taking his evening brandy, and he would be reviewing troop movement reports. He would be holding meetings with the occasional advisor, and he would be speaking with his general. He would be preparing for bed, and in the morning, when he rose, he would conduct official business with my older sister, Robin alongside him. Though I had made a mistake, he would be anticipating my return - the return of his son. But, what was left of his son now? 

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