Chapter 791: Subduing Salted Fish (Part 1/2)

Under the bodhi tree, Fangzheng lacked the mood to start reading Buddhist scriptures. There were many sentient beings in the monastery to begin with, and now there was a new member in the form of a salted fish which could speak. This vexed him a little. After all, this fish was obviously quite a piece of work. He needed to think of a way to take Salted Fish down a peg or two, so as to make him abide by the rules. Otherwise, if he were to jump up and demand people to call him ‘Ancestor’ the moment he saw anyone, who could accept that?

Therefore, Fangzheng got up and walked out One Finger Monastery. He saw Salted Fish making poses in preparation to jump into the Heavenly Dragon Pond.

Fangzheng coughed dryly and said, “Wait a moment!”

However, Fangzheng had underestimated how shameless Salted Fish was. Despite hearing him, the fellow had no intention of stopping. He stretched and jumped up into the sky, doing a 720° turn in midair. While in midair, he even posed like a sleeping arhat before diving straight towards the Heavenly Dragon Pond.

When he could see that the Heavenly Dragon Pond was inches away, a huge hand suddenly appeared behind his head and grabbed him in midair!

Salted Fish raged. “Who is it?”

He turned his head and saw Monkey’s half-closed eyelids. He looked completely indifferent as he said, “Master told you to wait, but you still jumped. From the looks of it, you don’t plan on having dinner.”

Monkey was agile to begin with, having honed his agility with his frequent thievery in Baiyun Monastery in the past. Furthermore, the present Monkey was no longer the Monkey from the past. Under the nourishment of Crystal Rice, Unrooted Clean Aqua, and Buddhistic aura, he was already more of a demon that just didn’t know any divine powers or transformations than a normal animal. In terms of speed and strength, he was already far more capable than his peers. It wasn’t difficult for him to capture this self-important, smug Salted Fish.

Salted Fish thought nothing of it as he said, “I’m a fish. If I don’t jump into the water, do you expect me to live on the land like you?”

The moment he said that, Fangzheng spoke up. “Amitabha. This Penniless Monk can tell you are leading quite a comfortable life even without water. In that case, continue living on the land in the future.”

“What!?” Salted Fish instantly turned flustered when he heard that as he hurriedly shouted. “No way! I’m a fish! How can I live on land? I’ll die! This is murder! Murder is a grave sin!”

“Master, don’t listen to his nonsense. He’s a sentient demon, an old salted fish who has lived for 90,000 years. He wouldn’t die even if he was struck by lightning,” Red Boy said.

The moment that was said, Salted Fish suddenly held his neck and cried. “Ahhh! This won’t do. I can’t breathe any longer. I’m about to die! I’m about to die! Oh no, oh no! I’m doomed… Ahh…”

Monkey looked helplessly at Fangzheng as the latter stroked his chin. “Jingfa, dig a hole. If he stops breathing, just throw him in there.”

The moment that was said, Salted Fish opened his eyes and struggled out of Monkey’s grip. He jumped onto the ground and fished out a pole from god knows where. With the pole in front of him, he bent his back as he walked to Fangzheng’s side while coughing the entire way. It looked like he had aged considerably almost instantly. Salted Fish looked pitifully at Fangzheng. “Master, I’m already so advanced in my years. All I wish is to return to my roots. Can you let me return to the pond?”

Fangzheng looked at the fellow who was like a joker in speechlessness. He silently took out a white handkerchief.

Salted Fish asked out of curiosity, “Master, what are you doing?”

Fangzheng sighed. “This Penniless Monk is afraid of being too ruthless and staining his hands with blood.”

Salted Fish’s expression froze as he asked, “Who are you beating?”

“Guess?” Then Fangzheng raised his right hand high as he circulated his Dragon Elephant Body Tempering Art. An immense strength surged to his right hand as his arm thickened. His huge palm turned crystalline like pure white jade! Anyone could tell that the delivery of that palm strike could kill.

Salted Fish naturally wasn’t afraid. Although he was weak, he had lived for 90,000 years. Even as a salted fish, he was still a sentient demon! He wasn’t someone a dabbler like Fangzheng could kill. However, he looked at the young brat through the corner of his eyes before raising his hand, subconsciously touching his body which was still devoid of scales. He hurriedly shouted. “Hold on!”

“What did you say?” Fangzheng asked.

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Salted Fish’s eyes darted around before he knelt down, wailing. “Master, I had a tragic life… Boohoohoo… I’m already tens of thousands of years old. Please show pity on me.”

Fangzheng finally understood what kind of person this fellow was. If his posturing failed, he used his age as an excuse, and if age didn’t work, he put on a tragic act! From a certain point of view, this fellow was quite talented. Unfortunately, he was born in the wrong place. If he’d been born a human, he could definitely participate in entertainment programs such as King of Tragedy and probably be crowned champion.

If this were anywhere else, Fangzheng wouldn’t have bothered with him. However, not here. This wasn’t an alternate world of Mount Numinous where demons ran amok. Every world had its own rules. Fangzheng could not allow this salted fish to destroy his peace and quiet; therefore, he needed to clamp down hard on Salted Fish and let him understand who was the master!

With this in mind, an idea came to Fangzheng. He thought of Red Boy. He could seal off Red Boy’s Dharmic powers at any moment, then could it be possible that he could seal off Salted Fish’s Dharmic powers as well? With this in mind, Fangzheng made an attempt.

“Hey! What happened to my Dharmic powers!?” Salted Fish suddenly jumped off the ground and exclaimed.

Fangzheng and Red Boy laughed when they saw this.

This was especially amusing to Red Boy. All this while, he had felt aggrieved from having his Dharmic powers sealed. Now that there was another person enjoying the same treatment as he, it was quite a refreshing feeling! Indeed, suffering alone is never the same as suffering with others.

Seeing Salted Fish stripped of his Dharmic powers, Fangzheng chuckled. “Salted Fish, if you wish to regain your Dharmic powers, perform well. If This Penniless Monk is in a good mood, your Dharmic powers can be returned. If not, humph.”

“You took away my Dharmic powers? I’ll kill you!” Salted Fish instantly turned flustered when he heard that. He “pulled up his sleeves” and charged over with raging killing intent!

Fangzheng pricked up his brows as he clenched his fish and punched Salted Fish—Shoryuken ¹ !

The next moment, Squirrel, Lone Wolf, Red Boy, and Monkey looked up into the sky.

They saw the salted fish fly up more than a hundred meters like a cannonball with a dragged out shout.

“Wow, fish can fly,” Squirrel said with a sigh.

Before he could continue speaking, Salted Fish fell from the sky, cursing. “Darn baldy, have a taste of my phlegm!” As he spoke, Salted Fish opened his mouth and was about to spit out his phlegm! Fangzheng turned his body to the side and slapped him with a backhand slap.

Bam!

Salted Fish flew out once again!

Red Boy was instantly amused when he saw this, crying. “Master, I’ll wait for you outside!”

Then, Red Boy ran out.

Squirrel, Lone Wolf, and Monkey were dumbfounded. What are they doing?

When Salted Fish came falling with his dragged out screams, Fangzheng changed angles and slapped again.

Pa!

Salted Fish flew over the monastery walls and over the Heavenly Dragon Pond!

Outside, Red Boy saw this and shouted. “Nice shot! Try my Spin Serve!”