Chapter 9: Volume 1 - CH 7

“….Are you okay, Alya?”

“….”

At a public park near the ramen shop, Masachika timidly called out to Alisa who was sitting on a bench listlessly.

But there was no response.

It seemed like she had used up all of her energy to put up a bold front, and now had been reduced to a corpse.

Masachika scratched his head wondering what to do as Alisa rested her elbows on top of her knees and pressed her forehead against her linked hands in silence, looking completely like a scholar lost in thought.

But before long, she slowly raised her head and looked around with empty eyes.

“….Where’s Yuki-san?”

“Yeah, she said she wanted to buy something and went somewhere, remember? And she’d meet up with us later, she said”

“….I see”

In some respects…. Or rather, she took advantage of Alisa being in a daze and went to Animate to splurge. Even though they were friends from the sme student council, she still didn’t want to reveal her otaku-ness at this stage, it seemed.

“….Are you okay?”

“Okay what?”

“No, I mean….”

Apparently, even after being exhausted to this extent, she still didn’t want to admit she had been defeated by extreme spiciness. Actually, she surely did finish that ramen with willpower, so I can’t say that she lost…. No, I’m not sure what she’s fighting for in the first place.

“Ah, umm… you wanna eat some ice cream?”

“….I want”

When Masachika looked around the park he spotted an ice cream wagon and asked Alisa about it, then Alisa nodded with an unusual frankness. The two then bought some ice cream and came back to the bench. But….

“….”

Masachika licked the chocolate ice cream he had bought, while staring fixedly at Alisa’s ice cream next to him.

Unlike Masachika who got one in a cone, hers was in a cup one. And on top of that, it’s vanilla, choco, and cookies & cream.

Make eeeverything~ splendidly sweet. Powdered green tea? Chocomint? Ice cream doesn’t need to be bitter or refreshing! No, it doesn’t even need a cone!, she said, as if to say it’s a very aggressive choice.

Even the clerk was a little surprised.

“This… is because I ate spicy food, okay”

“….Alright”

Noticing Masachika’s surprised and astonished eyes, Alisa spoke up as she everted her eyes, looking slightly embarrassed. Masachika nodded while thinking, “Well, but even so, you know”, to himself.

Although the reason was unknown, there were occasions where Alisa tried to hide the fact that she had a sweet tooth.

Perhaps she thought it didn’t fit her character.

(When there was time saying something like, sugar for the brain and energy for the body while chugging down sweet red-bean soup, what’s the point of trying to hide it now)

Even so, he wouldn’t go out of his way to expose what the person in question wanted to hide. Even if it’s obvious, if the person in question was trying to make it stay that way, he believed it needed to be respected.

(Geez, what a difficult personality)

Obstinate and ostentatious to the bitter end.

To Masachika, the figure of her continuing to work hard alone, earnestly trying to make herself be her ideal-self she wanted to be, was extremely dazzling and at the same time, somehow charming.

When he saw Alisa trying to work hard alone, it made him unconsciously want to help her. It made him want to help make her hard work worthwhile.

Was it due to self-conceit of desiring to protect, or was it no more than just a form of consolation to comfort his erstwhile father and himself.1 Even Masaschika wasn’t sure of it himself.

(either way, it’s all worthless motives)

While mocking himself this way, Masachika suddenly became curious about something.

“Say, Alya”

“What?”

“Alya, why do you want to be the student council president?”

“I want to because I want to be one. If there’s a higher place, I’ll aim for it. Do I need a reason for it?”

The answer returned for Masachika’s question was so simple that it was hard to judge whether it was an answer or not.

However, Masachika clearly understood that it was Alisa’s true feelings.

The person in question perhaps didn’t know the exact reason either. But, she couldn’t help but run.

If there’s a higher place, she couldn’t help but aim for it. That was the kind of human being Alisa Mikhailovna Kujou was.

(Yeah, she’s really amazing. I’m really envious of her)

He thought so from the bottom of his heart. How beautiful was a person who persisted to work hard, pursuing to be her ideal self.

How noble and precious was the figure of her, who kept on running on her own, without relying on others.

Masachika saw it clearly in Alisa, the radiance of her soul that only those who lived their lives to the fullest with pride were able to emit.

Yuki and Touya too were carrying the same radiance. But, Alisa’s looked stronger than those two’s, and yet, more fragile.

“If you’re going to run for the student council presidential candidacy…. Is there a candidate for the vice-president?”

In response to Masachika’s question, Alisa’s eyes shook for an instant…. she turned to the front as if ashamed of herself and answered with a firm expression.

“There’s none. But, it’s not particularly a problem. Things like vice-president, it’s unnecessary”

“No, saying it’s unnecessary is…. As long as there’s a rule to run the candidacy in pair, it’s not unnecessary”

“It’s fine as long as the vice-president’s name is on the paper, right? I’ll find someone to bear that role for me at random”

Those words made Masachika feel terribly lonely. This was it. This was why Alisa looked helplessly fragile.

Not relying on others. Not expecting anything from others. Not seeking recognition nor praises from others, only trying her best to pursue the results she envisioned.

No, perhaps it was precisely because she was thinking everything was for her own self-satisfaction that she believed she shouldn’t be relying on others.

Masachika just couldn’t leave such Alisa alone.

It was because he knew the limit of what one person could do. And because he knew the sadness, the pain, and emptiness one felt when their efforts were not rewarded.

(Efforts…. Should be rewarded. Human beings who truly exerting efforts with their all should seize the results they want)

Precisely because of this belief that Masaschika had been able to considerably help Alisa until now.

He even tried to ease up Alisa’s unapproachability by involving the people around her, getting her to cooperate with the people around her, and taking the initiative to call her by her nickname.

Looking at this girl, it didn’t seem to have much effect, though.

“….I see”

“….”

Alisa didn’t say anything. Without showing any emotion, she silently carried the ice cream to her mouth.

Was it.. Masachika’s conceit that he felt the silence as some kind of silent appeal. Yesterday when they parted, the words Alisa was about to say was….

At that moment, as if to affirm Masachika’s guess, Alisa who had finished her ice cream muttered.

【Together with you….】

Alisa stopped her mouth there, as if she was afraid to say anything anymore, even in Russian. However, for Masachika it was more than enough.

“But I….”

He didn’t have the radiance of soul that Alisa, Yuki and Touya had.

Neither the initiative to set his own goals, nor the passion to continue exerting efforts, facing forward.

Always leaving his goals to others . Always relying on the passions of others.

Even in the past, when Masachika was at his brightest, nothing had changed.

“Become a worthy heir to the Suou House”, such a goal was given to him by his mother and grandfather.2

The passion to reach that goal was given by his mother to her child. He didn’t make that decision on his own.

Just doing it to get his mother’s recognition, to get that girl’s praise.

Just running on the rails given to him by others, with fuels given by others.

And now that he had lost both of it, not moving anywhere, just standing still.

(I.. am not worthy)3

Masachika was.. grateful that Alisa’s words had been leaked out in Russian. If.. even if it had been said in Japanese… Masachika still.. would have had no choice but to choose cowardly remaining in silence.

And there, as if to change the mood, Alisa raised her voice.

“Kuze-kun, do you have an errand to do later?”

“Hmm? No, Nothing in particular”

“How about Yuki-san?”

“Nn~~… Well, we can just meet up later”

“I see, then come with me on my errand”

“Errand you said… Didn’t you say you were buying clothes?”

“That’s right?”

“No, what do you mean with ‘that’s right’… Things like a guy accompanying a girl choosing clothes, I think it’s an event that wouldn’t happen without a fair amount of intimacy, don’t you think?”

“Is that so?”

When he saw Alisa tilting her head, Masachika suddenly realized something.

(I see…. Alya doesn’t have any friends she’s close enough with that she can go clothes shopping together, so she doesn’t understand the subtleties of the situation, huh……!!)

Masachika, whose eyes involuntarily became hot due to a surplus of pity for her, suddenly bit down his molars and showed an expression somewhat full with affection.

“No…. I suppose not. I’ll go with you”

Alisa frowned at Masachika, who suddenly became more kind.

“What’s wrong? So suddenly like that”

“Well, we’re friends after all. Yeah”

“I still somehow don’t get it though?”

“Don’t worry about it”

After coaxing a dubious Alisa, Masachika returned to the commercial building.

They moved to the floor where the clothing & accessory stores were clustered, and randomly strolled around.

On the other hand, Alisa had a misunderstanding regarding Masachika, who suddenly became so kind.

(Don’t tell me…. He thinks I can’t become the student council president? And that’s why he suddenly became kind? Tsk, Don’t make fun of me!)

She gritted her teeth inwardly as Masachika completely acted as if he was a parent comforting a child or something.

For a long time, Alisa couldn’t stand this attitude of Masachika as if he was watching over her from one level up. However, opposing it head on now was what a child would do.

(Something… just something.. I want to get back at him. I wanna rip apart that leeway!)

Grrrrr, she groaned inwardly while racking her brain…. Alisa just now.. recalled the incident that happened the other morning.

(Now it’s come to this, I will show you my full power fashion show that will make you flustered!)

Under an incomprehensible determination born out of misunderstanding going completely in a different direction, Alisa entered a store that piqued her interest, and grabbed various clothes in the store then got into the fitting room.

“Then, I will change now. Let me know your opinion, okay”

“Sure”

She let Masachika wait in front of the fitting room, pulled the curtain and closely examined the clothes.

(First will be… this one)

The first thing she picked up from the clothes she brought inside was a summery pure white one piece dress.

(If it’s this one it shouldn’t be a miss. And Masha said boys absolutely love something like this!)

In contrast to her challenging determination, she was unaware that she’s playing it safe and chose a clothing according to her older sister’s information, who was shoujo-manga-for-brains had told her, which she wasn’t sure of if it’s accurate.

And then, as she reached for the button on her blouse to change…. suddenly she stopped her hands.

(….Wait a moment? Won’t.. the sound of me changing be heard outside?)

Currently, the only thing separating herself and Masachika outside was a single curtain. Moreover, there was a little gap at the bottom. Once she became aware of it, a sense of shame immediately welling up inside Alisa.

“Kuze-kun! Move away a little!”

Unable to endure it, she called out from the other side of the curtain and, “Yeee~”, an unmotivated voice returned together with audible sounds of footsteps walking away.

Feeling a little relieved after hearing that…. Alisa grew impatient as the sound of footsteps walking away was clearer than she had expected.

(Eh? If I can hear the sound of footsteps in the distance… the sound of rustling clothes can also be heard too, then?)

Somehow she felt like she was doing something unbelievably embarrassing, and she couldn’t calm down. She felt like she understood what Masachika had said earlier, “Things like a guy accompanying a girl choosing clothes, should be a fairly intimate~~”, but it’s too late now.

(No, it’s okay. There’s music playing inside the store…. The sound coming from here should immediately be drowned… in)

Alisa was so embarrassed she wanted to run away, but her own pride wouldn’t allow that.

She firmly suppressed her shame and began to undress with determination.

Trying not to think of the boy outside, she quickly changed her clothes and, knowing it’s meaningless, she listened carefully to get a glimpse of what was going on outside.

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(It seems… okay)

Convinced that there was no particular reaction, once again she turned to the mirror.

On the other hand, as for the person who was being listened to, the older ladies from the surrounding turned to him, saying, “Oh my, a student couple? I wonder if he’s waiting for the girlfriend. So cute~”, and the lukewarm gaze of the older ladies were met with a blank expression, “this, is the thing common in love-comedy….”, and he tried to escape from reality.

He wasn’t conscious of such things like the sound of rustling clothes, so Alisa’s worry was unnecessary.

Although it might’ve been disappointing for Alisa, he was more concerned about the stares from the people around him than the sound of Alisa changing clothes.

(Yeah, it looks good on me if I say so myself. Good job, me)

Posing in front of the mirror, she praised herself. Then, as she was about to pull open the curtain certain of her victory (Not sure when it became a contest though), suddenly she felt uneasy.

What if.. he’s completely not responding? What if he said “Ooh~ isn’t that fine?” such an indifferent line while fiddling with his phone? …..if that really happens I may cry. Just thinking about it makes my heart tightened.

(Fu, fuun! If you do I’ll slap you with my all!!)

However, Alisa mustered her fighting spirit, holding down her faintheartedness. She then pulled open the curtain strongly.

“What do you think?”

Hands on her hips, putting her weight on one leg, posing like a model Alisa looked at Masachika challengingly.

In fact, the combination of her exceptional build and beauty made her look stunningly good-looking.

For some reason, the older ladies inside the store leaked out a breath of admiration when they looked at her.

(This is the kind of thing boys definitely love!!)4

While shouting strongly in his heart, he swung down his fist on top of his imaginary desk. Apparently, Masha’s information was correct this time.

However, being too obvious here would definitely be what Alisa had wanted. He would lose if he acted embarrassed at times like this; Masachika was well aware of that.

That’s why I’m not going to defend, I’ll go on the offensive!

“Yeah, that looks good on you. Alya’s white skin perfectly matched the pure white dress. Your neatness and girlishness have been emphasized, and you feel like cuter than usual”

“U..eh? I.. see…?”

Alisa was flustered by Masachika’s counter. Being praised directly with a straight face made her feel somewhat restless.

“Then, I’ll try the next one….”

After mumbling like that, Alisa pulled back the curtain as if to run away.

The curtain obstructed their eyes…. immediately afterwards, Alisa and Masachika, both of them crouched down at the same time inside and outside the curtain.

(Eh? Eh? What? Eeeh? Somehow I was praised so much!)

(Embarrassing! It’s too much! You did well saying all that without laughing, me! This is bad. Fawning5 like that head-on was damn embarrassing! That girl, how can she do this all the time. Well, she can because she thinks they don’t get the message in Russian though!)

Not even having the leeway to mind the pleasant gaze of the older ladies from the surrounding, he’s holding his head, enduring the shame. Right close to him, Alisa also was holding her cheeks with both hands, enduring the shame.

(Eh? Wait, eeh? N-no way, cute he said… cute, he said!! ~~~~! Aah! Geez!)

Still, unable to take it anymore, she repeatedly hit the floor of the fitting room and hurriedly stopped after hearing the sound that was louder than expected.

Clearing her throat for no reason, she turned around and saw the reflection of her broken smile in the mirror. She then unconsciously pressed her forehead against the mirror with a thud.

Pressing and grinding her forehead against the mirror, the pain and cold sensation forced herself to regain back her bearings.

(Fuu~~~…. It’s okay. Come to think of it, isn’t it natural for him to be saying the obvious. Yes, Kuze-kun is surprisingly someone capable of praising girls, I see. I’m impressed)

While mysteriously passing down evaluation with a condescending attitude, she swept her hair to the back with a fwoosh, and the impression of “used to it” came to her mind.

(He’s used to it? To what?)

Thinking was unnecessary. It was.. about Masachika praising girls. Then, whom did he get used to praising, she wondered. There was nothing but only one answer coming to her mind.

(With.. Yuki-san….?)

All of sudden her head grew cold. Just a few hours ago, she saw it. The appearance of the two of them happily window shopping emerging in her mind, and a fuzzy feeling spread across Alisa’s chest.

“….”

Slowly pulling herself away from the mirror, Alisa shifted her attention to the clothes she’d brought in. And then from among those, she slowly took out jeans and a shirt, and started to change again.

That combination, especially the male-style choice of a black shirt with something written in English on it, she had an inkling that it was something she’s doing consciously, but it’s just her imagination.

If Alisa said she had no other intentions, then so it shall be.

“As for this, what do you think?”

Alisa opened the curtain with an expression full of confidence seeming to say, there’s nothing to be ashamed of, okay?

However, as expected Masachika wasn’t so insensitive to the extent of not being able to guess anything by looking at this outfit. But he wasn’t so tactless to purposefully point it out. It could be said that he was not fearless.

“This time you looked a lot cooler. Alya is more of a beauty type rather than a cute type, so I think you’d look good on something like this too, you know? And when you’re wearing jeans instead of a skirt, it really highlights your style too”

“Fu, Fuun~. You think so? Thanks”

This time, Alisa accepted the second high praise without problem. Not even trying to hide her smile, she even showed an unusual smiling face and thanked him.

“Well then, the next one”

“Kaay~”

Thus, she had completely forgotten her original aim of making Masachika flustered and started to truly enjoy the fashion show.

She changed clothes one after another, and even posed in front of the mirror and showed it to Masachika. Masachika, on the other hand, made full use of girls-killing-praise sayings that he had studied in 2D world to praise her.

Gradually, Masachika’s sense of shame was becoming numb, while Alisa was feeling better and better.

Like Masachika had guessed, Alisa didn’t have any friends she could go clothes shopping with, and her sister, with whom she sometimes went clothes shopping with, would always say “Alya-chan so cute~” no matter what she wore. That’s why it’s the first time for Alisa to be praised in such a specific way.

(Next is~~nn~~ ♪ next, one, is~~♪)

Completely in a good mood, she was humming in her heart while choosing clothes.

If Yuki was here, she’d definitely say something like, “so simple”, but the person in question wasn’t aware of that.6

Then, in a light-hearted mood she thought to herself, “I don’t think I’ll wear this but well, just in case”, while reaching her hand for the clothes she’d brought with her.

(This is not a little too bold…. Is it? But if it’s Kuze-kun, I’m sure he’d praise it)

What she chose was a camisole with exposed shoulders and a mini skirt. The amount of exposure was rather high, especially the mini skirt. When Alisa, who had long legs to begin with, put it on, it became a state that made her want to say “Hmm? Above the knee? Isn’t this much more like below the groin?”.

The usual Alisa would never wear it and if she did, she would never show it to the opposite sex but, Alisa had completely been swept in by Masachika’s killing praises. So she ignored the few remaining voices of reason and opened the curtain.

Yes, she didn’t even realize that the presence on the other side of the curtain had increased to two unnoticed.

“What do you think.. of….”

She leaned her upper body forward, and decided to make a wink while holding his right index finger to her cheek…. At that moment, Alisa noticed Yuki standing next to Masachika.

Their gazes met head-on, and Alisa froze with one eye closed.

On the other hand, while holding paper bags packed with otaku goods in her hands, Yuki looked at such Alisa and blinked her eyes, and….

“Uwaah, Alya-san so booold”

“….Right”

Yuki whistled with a simple expression and Masachika averted his eyes with an indescribable expression.

Looking at those two, Alisa cooled down at once.

The blood drained out of her, and immediately afterwards rose up to her face with a burst.

“….I guess so”

With flushed-red and cramped cheeks, Alisa gently closed the curtain and she quietly crouched down on the spot.

【….I want to disappear】

She then reconfirmed her current appearance in the mirror and muttered in a voice that sounded as it was about to disappear.

“Alya-san, what did she say?”

“….I want to disappear, she said”

“Fuh, what an innocent babyyy yeee”

“Who the hell are you”

However, even her murmurs were transmitted to the siblings.

◇

Afterwards, Alisa, who had become completely quiet, bought two of the clothes she had tried inside, and left early together with Masachika and Yuki.

Her mood didn’t recover even after getting on the train. Perhaps out of consideration for such Alisa, Masachika and Yuki were fiddling with their phones without talking.

“Then see you on Monday, Alya”

“Today was really fun. Let’s go out together again, okay?”

“Yes, see you”

Shortly, Masachika and Yuki got off the train first. After Alisa saw off those retreating figures, she sank limply into the train seat.

【Unblieveable….】

Remembering the foolishness of exposing (Alisa’s standard) herself earlier, she was assaulted with the urge to writhe in agony.

【With such a.. short skirt.. I definitely appeared like a vulgar woman…】

She buried her face on the paper bag on her lap, and for a while, Alisa was burned with shame and regret but then… she suddenly noticed something strange.

“….Huh?” 

Yes, something strange. Why did those two, just now, get off on the train station together, she wondered.

Masachika and Yuki’s house should’ve been three stations away from each other. Thinking about it normally, they shouldn’t have got off at the same station.

“….Eh? Eh?”

Then, there’s only one thing to be considered. Those two have no intention of going home yet. No, what if, perhaps they’re planning to go to either of their houses…..?

“Eeh—–?”

In fact, her conjecture was correct. Yuki couldn’t bring the otaku goods back to the Suou house, so she planned to enjoy the spoils of war at the Kuze house.

However, such circumstances were not known to Alisa.

“As expected, those two are….?”

A doubt rose inside her chest, but she somehow managed to suppress it from above.

(No. Perhaps, they just have other shops they want to go to)

After convincing herself of this…. suddenly she remembered something, and Alisa took out her phone.

(What did she say again, I wonder… I think it was, wither shirt(kare shatsu/boyfriend shirt)?)7

Doing a search relying on her memory, Alisa opened her eyes wide at the image shown.

“Wha–!?”

Her sudden strange voice drew the attention from the surrounding but Alisa didn’t have the leeway to mind that.

It was an image seemingly to be a cut out of a scene from a shoujo manga.

A man and a woman were sitting on a single bed, facing each other. The woman was wearing an oversized shirt and smiling shyly, and the man was…. naked on top.

(wha-wha-wha-wha-what’s the meaning of this!?)

The doubt she had forcibly suppressed from above brushed aside her hand, and broke through the ceiling.

(Eh? Eeeh? Eeeeeeh—-!?)

Alisa was gazing at the image wafting a really obscene atmosphere in wonderment. The man and woman in the image was converted into Masachika and Yuki inside her brain, and she hurriedly denied it.

(What’s really going on~~~~~~!?!)

Alone in the train, Alisa agonized over the unanswered doubt.

Chapter 6

ToC

Chapter 8

TL notes:

^1. The original JP was “それともかつての父親や自分を慰めるための代償行為に過ぎないのか” I’m not sure of it myself, it probably means the act of comforting himself growing up having a father, who was ONCE acted like an actual father. So TLDR: the act of comforting himself for not having a father figure when growing up, I guess? I’m reeeeeaaaaallly not sure with this one. But I couldn’t really think of anything else either.

^2. Aight hear me out. With this line here I’m 100% sure their mom didn’t remarry into money but rather originally from the Suou house. Their father is a diplomat while Suou house has been taking a diplomat role for generations and their parents attended the same Seirei, both met and married because of that, and now everything makes fucking sense!! That also means he was under the care of his grandpa home after their parents divorced confirmed. I seriously had this enlightenment few hours after I passed this line and in the middle of shower at that. All hail shower!!

^3. Luckily, you aint having any hammer you must use yea? No biggie then

^4. Ye, suddenly went back to Masachika

^5. Actually the word in japanese is “Dereru”. And for some reason the word fawning for Dereru never popped up in my mind until this point. It’s the same word “Dereru” in the title but, I really think I wouldn’t describe the “Dereru” in Alisa’s case as “fawning”. I mean, so far it’s more like the icy/harsh personality of hers had melted instead of fawning(this is after I looked up the meaning of the word on google), right? So the current title stays. And I could be wrong on this and “dere” is such a mysterious word to me, yee. I got the gist of it, but nyeeeeehh

^6. Alisa isn’t aware of her being a simple one

^7. She used this kanji “枯れシャツ” when saying “Kare Shatsu” but the kanji’s meaning isn’t boyfriend, rather withering, maturing, and stuff like that. and “Boyfriend Shirt” was read the same that “kare shatsu”.

Other changes/opinion:

1. Chapter 5 at the end:

“Stupid bastard!! It’s fine because they’re blood-related siblings isn’t it!!” to “Stupid bastard!! It’s good because they’re blood-related siblings isn’t it!!”.

In my head “Fine” and “Good” have different meaning here in the context. Similar to how yuri fans in 2D world would react to yuri stuffs happening before their eyes with “oooh good!!, this is really good!!”, I suppose Yuki’s leaning more towards this. If it’s before the change it’s heavily implied of her being brocon imho (I guess she’s still one? Or they’re just a really close siblings)

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