Chapter 28: A Decision of Heart

"How about a dessert? I can think about it if I like it."

The gravel in his voice sent jitters down her spine. Her heart thudded erratically; his warm body pressed to hers made her unbearably hot.

"Too much, too soon.." her heart dithered.

"Too little, too late!" his voice chirped. She licked her parched lips. It was getting difficult to think straight. She hadn't expected to be put to test so soon after her confession. But then he was right. He had earned her love and had proved himself worthy, while she had done nothing to deserve it. All she had done was to be rude, to push him away while clinging on to her demons. She had let them take over, and rule her life, choosing to live in their shadow. He was right. She had been unfair to him, ungrateful, living her life in her own cocoon, never really giving him a proper chance. But this man deserved better. He deserved a chance, her respect, her love, and much more. He definitely didn't deserve to suffer from her past. He had his own burdens to carry, and she had no right to dump hers on him.

Bracing herself, she calmed her nerves. Sooner or later, she had to conquer her demons, and she'd rather do it sooner if it meant proving her love for him.

"Do you trust me?" He rested his brow on hers, his dark gaze reaching for her soul. She closed her tired eyes. There was no question - trust, love, she had crossed those hurdles already. Now there was one last left, and she'd do it gladly if that meant proving her love for him.

"Yes." Her heart calmed as she raised her eyes to look at his handsome face. Yes, she'd do it for him, for them. She would look forward and not let her past haunt their future.

Darsh smiled.

"Thank you, Princess. Now let me take care of you."

*****

"You are too hot, Princess. Take this jumper off."

Nuzzling her face, he murmured his first order. Her heart raced miles an hour, her throat went dry. He was close - so close she had to step away to move her arms freely. Her fingers shook so badly, she was stuck in the middle and he had to help her out of the garment.

Once she was just in her cotton t-shirt, she felt much better. The cool air fanning her skin brought her some respite. His dark gaze raked her body snagging at the right places yet never lingering for too long. His eyes blazed with appreciation. She felt her cheeks heating.

"Beautiful!" He murmured as he hugged her from behind to plant feather-light kisses on her neck. His warm breath fanning her bare skin sent sweet tremors down her body.

"Now close your eyes and follow me." Wrapping a giant arm around her shoulder, he used his other hand to cover her eyes for good measure. They walked a few steps. She realized they had crossed the threshold into another room.

A thin sheen of perspiration covered her skin. The heat coursing through her body reached such fervor she was surprised she was still on her feet and not dissolved to the ground in a pathetic, mushy puddle. Her feet felt laden, a heavy weight pressed on her stomach that she was unable to shift. It could be fear or fatigue or anticipation of what was to come, she knew she was not up to it. Maybe this was a terrible mistake. She was going to fail him and she would fail herself.
Her eyes stung as one after another miserable thought pierced her heart. So much for her bravado, so much for her claims of love. Apparently, she was not up to it.

"This way, Princess." His arm around her waist, he guided her gently. She followed his directions meekly, her fingers curling into fists to stop them from trembling. A tear trickled her eye down her cheek and disappeared into her shirt. She felt a gentle finger wipe the trail away.

"Don't worry, Princess." His soft voice murmured in her ear. "Nothing will happen that shouldn't happen."

Startled, she whirled around to stare at his face. That assurance...What did it mean?

"I mean what I said, Princess," he said calmly. "You have nothing to fear."

Bending down, he pecked her lips again, then turned her around to lead her in. She sighed and followed. Her fiancé was a puzzle, and it was high time she started picking pieces to figure him out.

*****

"Keep your eyes closed, Princess." He stood her somewhere and moved away, but not before pecking her cheek again. She heard some shuffling, the sound of a drawer sliding open and shut.

He was back in a jiffy. She felt something sliding around her neck.

"Now open your eyes."

Aditi stared in the mirror at her own reflection staring back at her. She looked as pathetic as she thought, although with one exception. Something golden sparkled in the mirror, resting snugly against her bosom. It was small, heart-shaped, beating gently against her own heart.

Her face paled as her fingers closed on the golden heart. His eyes watched her in the mirror.

"This is my last surprise for this evening, Princess. Your neck is always bare, I thought this would help."

Her lips quivered as she opened the pendant with trembling fingers. There, in the little heart shape, sat her parents, smiling serenely as ever. It felt as if they had never left. It felt as if the night had never happened. Maybe it had never happened, or was she in a dream?

Her heart grew heavy, eyes brimmed with tears as she looked at him puzzled. How did he...?

"I found it... where you lost it," he said hesitantly. "That day on the mountain, the way you reacted to Lover's Point piqued my interest. I couldn't stop myself from probing."

He looked sheepish. She didn't know what to say. Her heart was filled with joy, yet shame and embarrassment came knocking at its doors. She had never felt so naked, was there anything that escaped this man?

"I've had it for some time, but never had the courage to return. You always looked so eager to escape me, I selfishly decided to keep it for myself."

Her lips quivered as her eyes lowered, clutching at her heart. His arms went around her, hugging her in a gentle embrace.

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"I think you need it more than I do. I'm sorry if I've hurt you, Princess, but I only want to see you happy."

Leaning into him, she let her tears roll as a soothing calm spread her heart. It felt as if she was home, safe, warm, loved, with her parents, and now this man to take care of her.

This was his love, he had proved it again. His actions spoke volumes, there was no need for words. She had been truly naïve to pester him for it.

"Why are you doing this?" She asked tiredly, lifting her eyes to him. "You said it was my turn to make up to you, right? How am I supposed to do it when you won't give me a chance?"

He smiled.

"You made it up already, Princess when you gave me your decision. It's enough for me. And it was just this morning that I promised I'll take care of you, right?"

She stared at him, once again left speechless.

This morning. Yes. She had nearly forgotten about it. It was just this morning that she'd told him she wasn't ready, just this morning that she'd felt trapped. It was just this morning that she'd wanted to run away, somewhere far, never to return.

Now it was the evening, and everything felt different. She had her parents back, and she had her fiancé. No one was trapping her and she was free to fly, yet she wanted to stay here, with this man, in his arms.

"Thank you, Darsh!" She couldn't think of anything else to say. Words failed her, but not emotions. Her heart leaped with insane joy, she reached his neck, lacing her fingers in his hair to pull it closer. Raising on her tiptoes, she tilted her face to kiss the man she loved.

There were no inhibitions now, no need for any appearances. No pain could stop her; no shame or embarrassment could hinder her path. She was finally free of her demons as she moved ahead to embrace her future, which was with this man, this man, and no other.

*****

Two hours later, Darsh dropped Aditi back home. Balwant Sharma stood on the front steps waiting for her on the dimly lit porch. The wind was howling; the sky looked to be bursting at its seams. Wrapping his shawl around him tighter, Balwant let out a sigh. It was going to be another dreadful storm.

"Stay here tonight," he told the boy who'd gotten down to greet him. "It's dangerous to drive in this weather."

Darsh obliged as a servant ushered him to one of the guest rooms. Balwant turned to his study, as expected Aditi followed him.

"So." He smiled, hoping to break the ice, but it didn't help. He had been pretending for so long, trying to hide his guilt under the guise of his anger that he didn't know what to say, how to face this girl. For all his power, he had failed to protect her. He had let her down, he had let his dead son down, in this old age, he had let himself down too.

"I am sorry."

The words were spoken in unison. Startled, they both looked at each other. Aditi swallowed.

"I am sorry, Dadaji. I know I should have told you but..." Her face turned ashen as she looked down, unable to meet his eye.

Balwant shook his head. He knew the reason for her silence. It was his fragile heart. She didn't think he could take it, and she was right.

"Don't be silly, girl. I understand," he said tiredly. "And forgive this old man. I was too shaken, and I took some decisions..." His breath hitched as a sudden coughing fit took him over. Aditi shot to her feet.

"Dadaji!" She hurried towards him, helping him with a sip of water, rubbing his back in panic. His fit receded slowly as he held on to her trying to get his bearings. A little more time was all he needed to finish the remaining tasks. He had been finalizing his will with Dawar for the past two days, and all he wanted now was to finish this last one before it was too late.

"So, about the marriage. I know you were against it before. I forced you into the engagement and you agreed to it for me. But I want to ask again, do you like the boy?"

He watched as the girl turned pink. Her eyes lowered as her answer came gently. "Yes."

"Do you like him enough to marry him?" Balwant wanted to confirm. The girl nodded again.

"Yes, Dadaji."

Balwant smiled a relieved smile. At last, some things were falling into place. The burden of guilt on his heart could now ease a little, he could go to meet his maker with a slightly cleaner conscience.

"Good girl. Now go to sleep. I have some more work to do."

The girl went to the sideboard to get out his blood pressure tablets. He smiled and chugged them down. Not that they were going to help, but he would do anything to set her heart at ease.

***** *****

 

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