Chapter 15: 15

“You’re the cute one, not me!!!”

 

In my room at the royal castle, after I finally came to my senses, I shouted at the top of my lungs.

After that incident, I stayed frozen like a stone statue, the lunch break was over, afternoon classes were finished, and then before I realized it I was already back at the royal castle.

 

After a while, my heart, which had been frozen like a stone, finally began to move. As soon as it began to move, the stone cracked, and the raging feelings overflowed, quickly evolving into a raging waterfall, which traveled through my body at an incredible rate.

I’m on the sofa, trying to push the limits on how small a person can curl up, just like the other day.

I’m sure that my face is absolutely red.

To tell the truth, I know this situation. I have a good sentence to describe this situation, my state of mind, and my despair, in just four words.

 

(I can’t take it…!)

 

I couldn’t take it anymore.

It was the first day. First day of going to the academy with Mika accompanying me. And yet, if he showed such a blinding smile at such a close distance, people would melt. That’s right, humans will surely melt. Humans aren’t equipped with that kind of functionality.

Not confident if I’m able to refrain from melting before him, I could only hold my knees in my arms, just muttering, “What do I do?” over and over.

I have to work hard on many things for my brother, but my head was already full of Mika. My vision started to get blurry with tears. But I’m a man, so I won’t cry over something like this. I just don’t know what to do, and it makes me quiver.

At that moment, I heard a knocking on the door. Since Marie never knocks on the door, I feel confused and tilt my head. But then—

 

“Nagi?”

“Eek-”

 

My body flinched when I heard Mika’s voice.

Wait, wait, I said to myself as I held out my palm, even though I knew there was no one in the room. A chill runs down my spine in the presence of the last person I want to see right now, just on the other side of the door.

“Please give my heart time to rest!” even if I thought of that, I had no choice but to answer him, “What is it?” I opened the door, then Mika’s face peeked in. That alone already pushed my heart to the limit.

 

Thinking it wouldn’t be good if he sat next to me on the sofa, I stood up and walked over to the bookshelf. My strategy was to show him that I was busy by pretending to rummage through the books and get him to leave quickly.

And yet, Mika muttered, “You see…” in a carefree way and suddenly said something outrageous.

 

“Wh-what? Y-you want to stay here?”

“Yeah. There’s a room for a personal knight, right?”

 

At his dreadful suggestion, my body shuddered and I’m visibly flustered.

My living room is followed by a smaller room where a personal knight can sleep there.

I don’t know how much time the first king and knight in the myth of the country’s beginning spent together, but that’s usually for each prince and princess to discuss and decide. So it’s not required to use that room, but if Mika wants to use it, he can. That’s certainly the way it is.

However—

 

“You don’t have to be with me all the time. This castle is well-guarded. You also must want some time for yourself, don’t you?”

“Why? Wouldn’t you feel safer if I’m closer to you?”

 

I flipped through a book and spoke while trying not to look Mika’s way.

But, as he kept persisting, I thought long and hard wondering how I could refuse him.

Since I distanced myself from Mika, in my timeline… it feels like at least eight years have passed. In Mika’s timeline, it probably has only been less than three years. But perhaps because we’ve been apart for so long, just the idea of being in the same space makes my heart feel like it’s going to explode.

And yet, as I was flipping through a book, something heavy digs into my shoulder. I flinched at the reflection of his auburn hair on the edge of my vision. Even though Mika must have noticed me flinching, he continued, talking in my ear.

 

“You’ve appointed me, so I want to protect you, Nagi. Let me protect you.”

“…….”

 

Mika’s clear voice resonated throughout my body, even the smallest of it.

His breath hit the nape of my neck, just as much as the words that he uttered. My heart was thumping with intense speed. Worried that he might hear the sound, sweat was forming in my palms.

I glanced to the side, and my eyes met with his jade-green eyes. And then he asked me.

 

“Can’t I?”

 

Before I knew it, Mika’s arm was around my stomach again, and I felt my shoulders tense up involuntarily. No matter how close we were, even if we were childhood friends, this distance is too close. In my first life, five years ago, I had already distanced myself from Mika. All he did was complain when we saw each other, so this distance frightened me.

Unable to do anything with the book in my hand, my body just stopped the function of moving while I was in a position to be hugged from behind.

 

In my first life, when I was with Machina, that room was only used a few times.

The castle is well-guarded, and there was never any inconvenience in my first life even if there was no personal knight there. There is no reason why Mika should be there.

Anyhow, if the man who expresses his affection at this close distance lived in the room next door, my heart won’t be able to rest.

There was only one answer.

 

“No.”

 

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I closed the book and pushed Mika’s head backward. As I said it, I nodded my head in my mind, thinking that it was a perfectly valid answer. I’ve never been good at getting involved with other people. It’s impossible for me to go to school with him every day and come back to the same place as him. If it’s with Mika, it’s all the more impossible for me.

—But, a strangely low and disturbing voice rings in my ear.

 

“Then, if something like this happens, can you handle it on your own, Nagi?”

“What?”

 

His arms that were around my stomach started to slide into my waistcoat. With the opposite right hand, he smoothly opened the buttons. Mika’s warm hand touched my skin directly. The book that was in my hand dropped to the floor.

 

“Huh, wait! Wh-what are you-…”

“This is no good. You’re so beautiful, but you’re too defenseless, Nagi. Everyone is after you.”

“Th-that’s not true!”

 

I couldn’t help but grab Mika’s wriggling hand from over my clothes. But Mika’s hand didn’t stop, it kept stroking my stomach and then went all the way up to my chest. I tried twisting my body, but he didn’t budge at all. I want him to stop breathing on my neck, it makes me shiver.

 

“Come on, resist me. The castle is safe even without me, right?”

“No, you’re the one who’s doing this…!”

 

Mika’s logic was messed up.

I don’t know what he’s thinking. But in actuality, I panicked because I can’t break away from him in the slightest. Now both of his hands are touching me under the clothes, and it made me almost lose my mind. I feel like I’m going to let out a pant, so I bit my lip.

Then, at that moment, Mika’s tongue slithered up my neck.

 

“Ha, ahh-”

“…….”

 

I shuddered at the voice I had let out. I was so embarrassed that heat gathered on my face all at once.

What’s with that sweet voice…?!  I tried desperately to retort back in my head, but Mika fell silent, and I just felt more and more embarrassed.

As I stayed frozen with my body still stiff, Mika hugged me tightly from behind. And then, he exhaled a sigh, and said.

 

“No. I knew it, this is no good at all. I won’t know when someone might come after you, Nagi.”

“I told you, there’s no one like that…”

 

Just as I said that, a hand came around from behind, grabbed me by the chin, and turned my face back. Mika’s face was at a distance where his breath could hit me.

My heart skipped a beat.

I felt the usually fresh jade eyes of his flickering softly. I couldn’t help but notice Mika’s lips, which were too close to mine. His lips, which always smile like the sun, slowly opened. His eyelashes, the same color as his hair, were pointed at me.

I was trapped by his unclouded gaze.

 

“Is it okay?”

“Huh?”

“…if I continue?”

 

Continue…? I wasn’t quite sure what it meant, but when Mika rubbed the tip of his nose against me like a courting animal, I finally understood. By continuing… did he mean… a kiss…?

 

(No, no, no. No way. I can’t take it, what’s this situation?)

 

Mika carelessly narrowed his eyes and whispered, “I’m totally fine continuing this,” so close that his lips almost touched my ear. It made me shiver.

 

“Eh, ah, wha-” as I was panicking, Mika’s request descended on me. He seemed completely unfazed even though he was doing such a thing.

 

“Quick. Give me permission to use the room.”

“Huh…. ahh, ….yeah.”

 

I was not calm enough at the moment to realize that it was the worst of the worst choice.

Then in a soft, gentle voice, Mika said.

 

“Thanks, Nagi.”

 

I didn’t even want to notice that Mika’s eyes were squinted with delight as he left.

When I said, “That’s too much…” he retorted back, “You won’t understand the sense of danger unless I do that, Nagi”. To be honest, I don’t understand why I should feel the sense of danger that he’s talking about in my room in the royal castle. But I didn’t want to think about anything anymore, so I abandoned the thought.

In the end, I could only watch in dismay as Mika told me he would pack his luggage and come back tomorrow. Then, I spent the rest of the night fainting in agony.

 

“AAHHH”

 

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