He sagged against the bedside, relieved. As she stared at in him astonishment, some embarrassment crept over his face. He leaned down and tucked her in once more before hobbling back to his bed. He worked hard at a natural smile as he explained: “I had a nightmare, I thought...”
Feng Zhiwei understood.
All those days and nights as she lingered on the edge of death, he must have stayed by her side just like this. All those long, dreadful nights, he had watched and waited in fear and anxiety. He had dreamed that she no longer breathed, and he had rushed over so many times now that it was already an instinctive reaction, and even now that she was recovering, he would still wake from the nightmare.
How many times had he woken like this and how deep and heavy his concern until he had formed such a compulsive habit?
Feng Zhiwei silently stared up at the ceiling, blinking.
Tears dripped down her face.
...
“Here, medicine.”
“Oh... Yi, Ning Yi, look!”
“Stop playing. Ning Cheng won’t come; Yan Huaishi won’t come; there are no assassins; Hua Qiong is fine... Really, Feng Zhiwei, this trick is already old. Stop messing around and take the medicine.”
“Oh.”
The failed trickster obediently accepted the bowl.
“Let me.” Ning Yi said, ignoring her hand. “Or else you’ll play some other strange trick.”
“Your eyes are not well, how will you feed me.” Feng Zhiwei replied, dodging aside. “I’m afraid you’re going to feed it into my nose.”
“I can see you.” Ning Yi replied simply.
Feng Zhiwei hung her head in silent defeat; she was no unruly child and understood that good medicine tasted bitter, but this medicine was really too terrifying. She bet Child Urine[1] tasted better than this, and even after drinking this medicine everyday, she still could not get used to it. Every time she drank this medicine the more afraid she became.
Some time had passed since she had woken, and other than this horrible medicine, Feng Zhiwei was taken care of better than she had ever been — surrounded by close friends and attended by His Royal Highness. While Feng Zhiwei was too weak to refuse anything, Ning Yi had helped her patiently and delicately, and by the time Feng Zhiwei’s strength grew enough that she could push him away, certain matters had already solidified into habits. To refuse to let him feed her seemed almost ungrateful.
Intimacy was the best method of grinding away hostility and washing away deep rooted resistance. After returning from the edge of death, survivors were more willing to relax and soften their hearts; Ning Yi and Feng Zhiwei had always thought similarly and been able to cooperate, but now after the disasters of this trip, the distance between them fell away and their guard against each other was lowered, leaving in their place a new degree of gentle warmth.
The silver spoon clicked against the porcelain bowl as Ning Yi calmly sat by her bed and fed her. The medicine not only tasted horrifying, it also smelled incredibly pungent, but Ning Yi acted as if nothing could phase him and first brought the silver spoon up to his face to smell its quality before accurately feeding it to her.
Feng Zhiwei stared down at the faintly steaming spoon and then looked up at Ning Yi’s dimmed eyes, so different from his previous brilliant gaze. She felt a weight in her throat and chest, and she obediently opened her mouth and swallowed the medicine.
The courtyard was quiet, and the only sound was the faint whispers of a mouse up above — Young Master Gu was eating his walnuts again. Peace reigned.
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After a persistent Ning Yi had fed her the entire bowl of Medicine, Feng Zhiwei let out a long breath; but before she could speak, a snowy handkerchief was brought over to her mouth and gently pressed against her lips.
“Don’t move.”
The last dredges of medicine were wiped away and Feng Zhiwei opened her mouth again, and a sweet fruit was placed on her tongue.
“Longxi’s Pickled Sweet Plum.” Ning Yi mumbled through his own. “I quite like it.”
“I’m being treated like a child.” Feng Zhiwei smiled, “But when I was sick as a little girl, I never had care like this.”
“Then I’ll make up for the past.” Ning Yi chuckled, his hand on her hair.
Feng Zhiwei’s heart quivered and she turned away, looking out at the autumn sun. “Today’s pretty nice.”
“Let’s go sit outside and you can have some fresh air.”
Young Master Gu floated down, a hand lifted the patient and a hand lifting the soft bed, helpfully carrying Feng Zhiwei to spare His Highness the trouble, and the Highness who had just been looking forward to carrying the beauty in his arms could only follow, sad and angry.
Young Master Gu clumsily set up the bed and then buried Feng Zhiwei under three layers of blankets. Feng Zhiwei struggled valiantly under the thick cloth, only her eyes peeking out from them as she struggled to say thanks.
A satisfied Young Master Gu returned to his rooftop to continue eating his walnuts as Feng Zhiwei called out for Ning Yi’s rescue: “Quick... I’m suffocating.”
Ning Yi smiled as he moved away the two outer layers and rearranged the messy bed, somewhat gleeful as he announced: “See, you need me.”
Such a narcissist, but Feng Zhiwei had to admit: “For now.”
“It’s nice even if it’s temporary.” Ning Yi replied, sitting down beside her. “I hate it when you push yourself too much.”
Feng Zhiwei fell silent and they sat together quietly watching the autumn wind. The dappled red maples lined the yard alongside an assortment of chrysanthemums ranging from shades of purple to yellow. It was beautifully lonely as a flock of migrating northern goose arced through the high, clear sky, scattering wisps of cloud with their dark wings.
One lay as the other sat, and they shared the quiet peace of the late autumn day. The listened to the flowers and leaves fall from branches and little birds rustling while dew dripped from lotus leaves. It did not matter what they could or could not see, for the view was in their heart, and they were in each other’s hearts.
The quiet lasted for a long time, and then finally the hurried patter of anxious footsteps neared. Feng Zhiwei looked up and slowly smiled.
“Take care.” She said.
Ning Yi slowly lowered himself, his breath warm against her ear. Feng Zhiwei tried to move aside, but there was nowhere for her to go as his lips neared and neared and finally touched her ear. He whispered quietly, voice as gentle as his lips against her skin: “Wait for me.”
Feng Zhiwei did not reply, and he gently bit down on her earlobe, neither hard nor light. She felt herself prickle and itch, but for some reason the feeling did not come from her ear.
His breath was gorgeous and cool like an autumn cloud gently curling around her. His gaze twinkled like a floating boat, as if here to capture a heart and bring it away.
She could not reply, but he refused to leave without her answer. He breathed gently beside her, his breath calm and shallow and light, afraid that he would startle her weak body. But still, her refused to let go, and Feng Zhiwei could only smile helplessly, pushing him aside and clutching her ear before finally saying: “I have to wait for you so we can return to Dijing together.”
[1] According to the Compendium of Materia Medica 本草纲目, Child Urine is urine from any child under ten years old, and the best Child Urine is a boy’s first morning urine the day before his first month. Lol
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