Ethan looked at his family, happy to see them all together. However, he could also feel the tension between his son and his son-in-law.
He was sick, not senile.
He noticed how Alex refused to shake Gerald’s hand, a very unusual behavior of his son-in-law, so he could tell he must have his reason. A solid one.
Still, he enjoyed hearing his wife laughing at Gerald’s stories. He also loved hearing that despite what happened to his son, he still had some good memories of his childhood with his mother.
He still could not help but blame himself for what his son had gone through because he was not brave enough to face what he had done. He did not clean up the mess he made and allowed his son to suffer in the end.
“Do you need anything?” His daughter asked, standing by his side while his wife and Gerald returned to their seats, continuing their exchange of stories.
On the other hand, Alex just stood behind his wife, probably waiting for an opportunity to talk to him.
.....
“I think I have everything I need in this room.” Ethan finally answered, smiling at his daughter, who moved forward to hug him. But she was careful not to hurt him as she gently kissed him on his cheeks before moving away from his hold again.
He hoped that he could spend more time with his family. Enjoy more similar scenes like this. But, he could feel that his time was running out.
It was like the universe was telling him to get his shit together while he still had the chance. He might never get another one. But he wished it was enough because he doubted fate would grant him another extension.
“Anyway, how are Fred and Katherine?” Ethan asked, hoping to divert the attention from his condition. At the moment, he needed to think of how he would resolve the issues he might be leaving behind.
Alex was surprised by his question, but he quickly bounced back. “My parents are well. They sent their good wishes for your fast recovery.”
Of course, he was glad to hear that. He did not want to leave his family without anyone other than Laura looking after their kids. He was confident that the Duke and Duchess would always be there to guide these young ones until they were ready to be on their own.
But, he did worry about Gerald. He had been on the wrong path for so long that changing his ways would be difficult. But he was hoping that it was still not too late.
“I am glad to hear that,” Ethan happily answered. Still, his eyes kept wandering to his wife and his son. “When you visit them, please also send my regards,” Ethan told Alex and Dani.
“I am sure they would appreciate hearing that from you once you see them.” Alex countered, appearing still hopeful that he would recover from this.
“I am sure they will.” He also answered, but he doubted his words.
“Do you mind if I have some time with Gerald?” He knew he was tired and would rather sleep, but he needed to make an effort to talk to his son.
He could tell that his wife, daughter, and even Alex were anxious to talk to him. But he felt it was Gerald who most needed his undivided attention. He was the most lacking his time compared to the rest of them.
“Of course,” Laura was the first to answer, standing up and moving toward him. Well, she understood him the most compared to his kids.
She kissed him on the lips before stepping away. “Dani and Alex, come on. Let us leave them for a while.” His wife encouraged the couple to go with her.
Dani was reluctant to leave him, but he could tell that she understood him. But Alex’s eyes showed him he still did not trust Gerald, even one bit. He understood his son-in-law’s concern, but it was the risk he had to take.
Gerald was still his son and would always be a part of him. Now that he was part of his family, he would never forsake him again. It was unfortunate that he would not be there for him for long.
“This is odd.” Gerald was the first to break the silence as he stared at him when the others had left the room. “I thought that you would ask me to leave.”
Gerald moved closer to the bed, studying him, probably trying to read his intentions. But he would be disappointed because he had no other agenda.
“Well, I need to talk to you first,” Ethan answered his son.
He was ready to die because he had already seen that his family would survive without him. But when Gerald came into the picture.
He realized his son was the last missing piece he still needed to fix. He had to glue him into the puzzle so his entire family would finally be complete.
“I am here, so what do you have in mind,” Gerald answered him casually as if he was talking to a client rather than his father. But that was only natural since he could not force him to accept him as his father.
“I love you, son.” Saying it repeatedly to him would not change the fact that he robbed him of his identity all this time. But he swore he would make up to him until his last breath.
“I wish I could tell you the same thing,” Gerald responded with regret. Well, he hoped that was what he read in his eyes before he casually changed it to indifference.
At least, it gave him hope that his son still had a heart. That someday, he still might change for the better. But for now, he understood that it might take more than his proclamation of love to make him see that there was more to life than hatred.
“But if that is all you wish to tell me, I guess we have nothing else to talk about,” Gerald spoke again before he could find the words he wanted to say to him.
“No, I want to discuss something with you.” He breathily said. He realized that talking was already taking a toll on his remaining energy, but he still had a few things to tell him.
He was glad that Gerald kept silent, just waiting for him to finish. He was both impatient and curious about what he had to say.
“I wish to shout to the world that you are my son. I do.” Ethan continued, watching his son’s expression that remained stoic. “I wish to tell everyone how much I love you.”
He could feel the tears threatening to flow down his cheeks, but he held it as much as he could. “But I am leaving that to you. The decision is yours if you wish to acknowledge me as your father.”
Ethan wished he could say some profound words that would convince Gerald that he had a family he could depend on, but no word came into his mind.
At the moment, all he could wish was to have his son in his arms. But when he turned around without saying anything, he knew he had missed that chance.
As he watched his son’s back walk out that door, he knew somehow he had failed as a father to him. He would be his one regret he would have to carry to his grave.