Looking outside her window, she could not stop the tears that fell in her eyes. Her heart broke again into a million pieces, but that was ok. She would get over this just like before. She would move on.
This incident was not the end of the world for her. This pain would eventually disappear in time. She would be back to her old self in no time.
But in the meanwhile, she would allow her heart to grieve for losing again. She permitted the water in her eyes to rush down her face like a waterfall. It was the only way to release the pain gripping her soul.
Amelia could still hear his voice in her head, “I want you so much.” He had said to her as their bodies entwined while he reveled in her body as if he could never get enough of her.
She never felt so alive underneath his skillful ministration. She believed he was doing a great job introducing her to the world of sex and passion. Who knew this was how great it was to be with a man?
He kissed with an intensity that had her craving for more, and when his lips created a path across her chest and down her body, she knew she was burning with desire. Her lips formed sounds she had never heard her utter before.
Her hands imitated what he was doing, hoping to elicit the same response from him. She also wanted to know how to pleasure a man like him. So far, she could tell that she was on the right track as he hissed with satisfaction every time her hands wandered on the right spot.
.....
“Please!” She begged him repeatedly, moaning uncontrollably. Honestly, she had no idea what she was asking for, but she knew her body was yearning for something.
“What do you want?” He asked her as his hands glided down her supple skin and lips touched and kissed all the sensitive parts of her body, teasing her to submission. But she had already surrendered.
All he had to do was conquer her. What was he waiting for as she twisted and turned underneath his body? She wanted more. She wanted him to show her what it was like to be one with him.
“I want you.” She demanded, feeling her body release the tension that built inside her, shivering underneath his skillful hands. She felt great, but she knew it was not enough. She needed something else.
Then, he stood up and grabbed his pants.
She suddenly felt alarmed, thinking he was about to leave. But felt relieved when he returned to the bed and on top of her. She realized that he was only taking precautions.
She did not even think of that. She could have easily been pregnant without any protection. She was certainly not on a pill. She could have ended up in the same boat as her friend, Eida. Luckily, he seemed prepared for this kind of situation.
Suddenly, fear gripped her, making her stiff on the bed as she felt him at her entrance. “What is wrong?” He suddenly asked her as his eyes searched her face for answers. He abruptly stopped, probably sensing her hesitation.
“Nothing.” She tried to calm herself down. She had nothing to fear because Evan would not intentionally hurt her. She believed that. She trusted him. “Please, don’t stop. I want you.” She whispered as fear and pleasure mixed inside her.
Besides, it was not very likely she would get pregnant because he was using protection. She had to stop overthinking everything and learn to enjoy the moment. She reminded herself she wanted this to happen.
Then, he repositioned himself on top of her, feeling his desire at her core. It both excited and scared her, unsure of what she would expect.
Well, she was not completely clueless about sex but experiencing it for real was a different ballgame. It was not just fantasy anymore, but something that involved a lot of feelings.
“I won’t.” There was a promise in his tone as he plunged into her. But he did stop midway inside her as she winced in tremendous pain. Her eyes automatically closed, and her fingers balled into a fist at his back.
She could see that he was slightly reluctant, probably realizing that this was her first time. How would he know when she hardly told him? And in this day and age, who would have thought she would still be untouched?
“This will hurt, but I will try to be gentle.” He said in his low guttural tone. She could sense the control he exerted on himself, but as he said, he was beyond stopping now.
He paused, but only for a second, adjusting himself before plunging fully inside her, breaking down her walls. She bit her lip to stop herself from crying, but tears still slid down the side of her eyes.
She felt his full size inside of her, filling her up. Although pain still dominated her body, she felt her body relax under him. She wanted this to happen as much as he did. She was finally one with him.
“I promise the pain will be over soon.” He said as he groaned, visibly with pleasure, closing his eyes as he started moving inside her again. Slowly at first, she believed he was letting her body adjust to his size. He was lessening the pain from his thrusts.
Soon, she sensed a different sensation inside her. The friction was creating a different reaction in her walls, arousing an intense desire inside her that demanded gratification.
Eventually, his movement increased their speed as he sank into her body deeper and faster. He was right. The pain gradually decreased as pleasure overtook her body.
She believed she could never have enough of him. She did not want him to stop. She hungered for more, wanting something she never thought she needed before.
“Aaahhh! Evan!” She could not stop the moans that escaped her lips as he lifted her higher and higher, making her want more of it. “Evan!” She kept calling his name as she floated to the heavens.
Finally, she hit her climax as she exploded inside, releasing the pressure she had kept for a long time, the sexual tension between them from the beginning until now.
“Aaaggghhh!” He groaned loudly, like a lion that just had his prey. She felt him become stiff inside of her body, realizing he just had his release just after her. Then, he dropped down on top of her, sweating and breathing heavily like her.
She believed it was one of the greatest moments of her life. A memory she would cherish all her life. To finally be with the man she loved and be one with him.
After a short while, he moved to the other side of the bed and lay silent while she stayed on her side. Suddenly, all her doubts came rushing back into her mind. Was he starting to regret sleeping with her? That was crazy.
Then, Amelia felt him pull her to his body, cradling her in his warm embrace. Suddenly, she was confused, or maybe she was wrong. But one thing, she should stop jumping to her conclusions.
“Go to sleep, Amelia.” She heard him behind her. She wanted to say something, but what?
Should they not discuss what just happened? She had questions. But she had no idea how to talk to him. What to tell him as she stared at the blank space before her?
She also waited for him to say something else, but he remained silent until she felt his breathing become steady. He must have fallen asleep while her eyes were still wide open, mauling over what happened.
She could not wake him up, so she stayed steady, not moving while her thoughts ran wild with possibilities. However, exhaustion finally won over her as her eyes succumbed to the darkness, as she also fell asleep.
But her confusion was cleared up when she woke up this morning with the other side of the bed empty and cold, meaning he had been awake for some time. There was no sign of Evan anywhere in the room.
He did not even leave a note or a message as if he was not there last night. Was he just a figment of her imagination? Of course not! He was real because she felt sore all over her body. She saw the only evidence that he was with her last night.
Now, she was flying back home. She quickly grabbed her things and booked herself on the next available flight. She could not stay a minute longer in that hotel room. It was just too painful.
Why did he leave without even saying a word? Did what happened to them mean anything to him at all? Or was all of this just a game to him? But she only had herself to blame. She knew what and who he was. Still, she took a risk with him.
Now, she had to accept the consequence of her action.