Chapter 26: 26

Chapter 26. The Inner Desire For The Real Thing (3)

“Lusi.”

“Yes?”

“We’re a family, right?”

“Huh?”

Why did he suddenly talk about marriage, when had he talked about marriage before?

Elusiana stared at him, wondering what this meant. Is something really going on? Even when she faced Astein’s face, she couldn’t understand what he was thinking.

Elusiana gave up rolling her head and replied, “Of course, we’re a family. The only family in the world that will never be replaced.”

“Yes, Lusi and I are family.”

Astein’s lips, who rolled the word ‘family’ into his mouth, were finely curved. But why did his smile look cold, like frosty ice? Sure enough, Astein added a few words.

“But it’s not ‘real.’”

“…what’s the point of that? We’re a family that is more real than a real family. R-Right?”

“No. You’re wrong, Lusi.”

Elusiana’s lips closed tightly at the sharp tone that had been waiting for that moment.

“Because ‘fake’ cannot be ‘real.’ But I want to be a ‘real’ family with you, Lusi.”

“…?”

For a moment, a golden light shone ecstatically in his red eyes. Then it disappeared like a mirage after Elusiana blinked once.

“So answer me, Lusi.”

Astein’s hand, hovering in the air, touched Elusiana’s cheek. His red eyes somewhat emanated a strange heat. As their eyes met, Elusiana somehow felt tingly inside her heart.

“What do you think of me?”

“…W-What do I think? It’s just that I—”

“I like you.”

Elusiana’s scarlet eyes trembled slightly at the low voice.

“Elusiana Loti Waieos. You.”

The sunset-like gaze reached her. Her lips, which had been pouting, had already hardened like plaster. Astein, who was still looking at her, smiled faintly and withdrew his hand. Then he looked at the red sunset as if he had never done anything.

“…”

She knew. That those words couldn’t be a passionate confession of love. Astein was a person who wasn’t only insensitive to himself but also to other people’s feelings. So, if she had to explain the meaning of his words that sounded like a confession—

It means that he likes me as a family. Wanting to be a real family also means wanting to be closer than now.

It must be like that. But why, right after hearing the word ‘I like you,’ her heart… was running like crazy. Her mind was so messed up that she couldn’t even think of anything. It jumped as if it would pop out from her chest.

Haa… This ungrateful Astein. Why are you setting fire to my silent heart!

 

* * *

 

The light breeze blew once again. Astein made a sad smile as he savored the scent of lisianthus that drifted to the tip of his nose.

His light. My Elusiana. Her brown hair, which hung down to her waist, fluttered as if dancing to the wind. Astein looked at her back as she hurried down the hill with a faint gaze.

 

“I’m warning you, don’t ever read romance novels again. Does everything written there look real? No, it’s full of crap. You will get a slap on your cheek if you act like a character there. And you! Astein! That… t-the word ‘I like you’… you should never overuse such words. You can’t say it to anyone, understand? Never!”

 

Unable to cover up the blush that stained her face, she fired her words all at once and hurriedly turned around and ran away, wondering what was so urgent. Even when he said that he would stay here a little longer, she quickly left her seat, leaving behind the words, “Do as you please!”

Is it really embarrassing to hear that I like her?

Astein turned slowly away at the blurry sight of her running dangerously, she was about to fall. His face, which had a gentle smile, had returned to an expressionless face.

“What is it?”

Obviously, there was no one but Astein, but someone appeared behind him.

“Young Master, how have you been?”

“I should have warned you not to look for me until I called you.”

Astein, who leaned his back against the tree as if he was annoyed, closed his eyes, and the man who bowed his head added a few words.

“The first young master is back.”

Astein sneered, opening his closed eyes in irritation.

That Genoyer?

Astein was only 5 years old at that time. After chasing her mother, who was taken by an assailant, he visited the Grand Duchy Sestain. However, he was locked in the cold dungeon, not in the arms of his mother, whom he longed for.

He still remembered. The eerie voice of a man called ‘Father’ who was smiling gently with cold eyes. And his fair hands stretched out like shackles.

 

“Don’t worry. I will let you see your mother soon. As long as you hold out as promised.”

 

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For the next seven years, Astein had to survive all kinds of experiments.

That day. The day he ran away from the Grand Duchy dungeon. If it hadn’t been for the ridiculous kindness of his half-brother, Genoyer, he would have already disappeared from this world.

 

“Don’t you know? If you’re lucky, you will be able to get out of here on your own two feet. Aah—Of course, you will have to crawl, but that way, you’re still using your feet, right? Hahaha.”

 

The man approached Astein, who was recalling the past.

“There will be a party soon to celebrate the birthday of the first young master.”

As Astein pretended to listen, the man continued.

“There will also be several key figures from the family.”

Was it because of the thick sunset? The man’s eyes, originally resembling the sun, flashed terrifyingly with a dark red light.

“So are you saying that I have to decide quickly what to do?”

“It’s already very late.”

“That’s a presumptuous inference, Louis.”

The elderly gentleman with gray hair looked at Astein with a sharp eye. “With all due respect, I can’t guarantee what will happen next if you miss this opportunity. Think carefully, even for the young lady’s sake, young Master.”

What a cunning fox. Astein clicked his tongue briefly. But what Louis said was right. Since Genoyer, the legitimate successor of Grand Duke Sestain, had returned, he couldn’t delay any more than that.

Genoyer left his long study abroad and visited the Grand Duchy to solidify his position as a successor. However, if Astein didn’t return now, he didn’t know when the family would gather again. It could be one year later, two years later… or longer than that.

 

“From now on, we’re family, As. We’ll be together forever.”

 

Elusiana, who was speaking kindly, came to his mind.

That’s right, if it’s to become a real family with you, being apart like this wouldn’t be a big deal.

Astein sighed quietly as if swallowing a bitter drink.

“Two days later. Let’s move then.”

“It’s a wise decision. Then, I will see you again.”

A gentle smile formed around Louis’ mouth and disappeared. And when he looked back, Louis had already disappeared.

Astein looked up at the sky with an indifferent gaze. Through the red sunset, many dark clouds resembled gray. As if to foresee a bleak future for oneself.

“It’s going to rain soon.”

Astein rose from his seat, frowning. He really didn’t have much time left.

 

* * *

 

Astein, who came down from Windy Hill, stopped for a moment at the crossroad.  

“The timing is exquisite.”

Just then, a drop of rain fell on his shoulder. Astein sighed dryly as he looked disapprovingly at the drizzling rain.

He hated rainy days. Because the damp air used to bring out memories he didn’t want to recall. The day they took his mother from him while he was playing in the unknown forest, the first day he visited Grand Duchy Sestain in search of his mother, the day he was locked up in a dark dungeon by his father, who promised to let him meet his mother. It all happened on rainy days.

 

“If you listen to me, I will take you to your mother.”

 

However, after a long period of patience, what he faced was the death of his mother. The loss of an indispensable existence, the only one in the world. It was as terrible as if the world was falling apart for the five-year-old child to bear. What was even more shocking was the fact it was his father who killed his mother.

 

“I’m sorry to tell you this. Your mother is dead.”

 

With wicked consolation, he hugged him with a sorrowful face. It was the first day in his life that he lost a loved one, and at the same time, he realized how trivial and meaningless faith was.

Astein took to the streets as if to shake off unpleasant memories. The cool air and the raindrops collided with him, making him feel even colder. As he passed the familiar streets, he casually looked around Windy Hill, which he couldn’t see well in the distance.

She should have gone back to the mansion by now.

On the day of her visit to Angel’s house, Elusiana returned home after lunch with the children. But now it was already night when the darkness had settled down for a long time, and the lights were on. She would have gone back to the mansion if nothing had happened. Maybe she would be worried about him if he didn’t return when it was already this late.

She must be staring out of the mansion while suppressing her anger.

With her little head completely full of me.

Astein felt a little better. Thinking of her stamping her feet while waiting for him made him feel satisfied. But… that’s it. Suddenly, bitterness spread on Astein’s smiling face.

The woman who was unnecessarily kind and affectionate. He knew that she saw him just as a little brother for a long time. She was trying to take care of him because she felt sorry and pity for him. However, Elusiana treated everyone like that.

Astein, who stopped walking, swept away his wet hair. Wrinkles caught between the eyebrows disappeared, leaving a deep mark like a scar in his heart. As if he was trying to hide his accumulated anger by forcibly suppressing it.

“It’s okay. I will be ‘real’ from now on.”

He would monopolize those kind eyes and warm hearts. His red eyes, full of obsession, shimmered with a strange light. Then, something caught his attention. 

 

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